invented by the chinese

she opens with an outline, and says she’s giving info because she thinks the community deserves to know, and specifies she’s only talking about her experiences and emphasizes that the victims coming forward are the ones who deserve empathy, not him.

aug 2017, ryan makes instagram, she’s 17. she dm-ed him how much she admired him, they had a casual back and forth until he checked her instagram and saw her pictures and changed his tone to flirty. she says she tried to play off his first couple of flirty messages as just him being awkward, but he keeps leaning into it. (he tells her he’s alone in his room at pax and he asks “what kind of package” she wants and she jokes about “what’s the dad package?” still trying to play it off and he says “hugs? it’s a bit different from the daddy package ;)”

she stops trying to play it off at that point and asks what’s the situation with him and his wife, he gives her a sob story about how he loves her but their sex life is dead, michelle says “i am so sorry to laurie” and says her reasoning was if that she was fulfilling his physical needs, their marriage could continue, specifies that she knows it was stupid but thought it was a solution at the time

she asked him if he slept with fans, he said once a long time ago, but he didn’t anymore. she says her reasoning is that if she did it, he wouldn’t risk his career by asking a different fan, or risk his marriage. she says they started sexting consistently and in sept all of ah was in la and ryan had his own room, say on sept 23 she lost her virginity to him and posts a timestamped photo of him walking around his hotel room where you can see her legs on the bed, mentions he seemed to be into the virgin thing and “teaching” her.

he never asked for her age, just asked her if she was in high school or college, and she was in college at the time as a 17 year old.

he told her that whenever she was ready for sex to just tell him, she told him, he immediately ripped off her dress, put on a condom w no foreplay and went straight for penetration, which she says “obviously didn’t work”, and his solution to make it go smoother was to take the condom off, finger her for a minute or so, and then penetrate her again condomless. she says it lasted for hours and was pretty rough.

november she entered a relationship, so she ended their sexual relationship but he continued to check in on her every few months to ask about her life and school and if she was single. she says she really thought he cared about her because he supported her a lot, but after tessa came forward she found out there were other people with stories pretty much identical to hers that she realized that it was wrong, and she wasn’t special, or a one time thing, but a part of his pattern of young fans who admired him with little experience. 

she says she doesn’t think it’s a coincidence that many of the people he engaged with had mental health issues, or were virgins,

she says that he noticed she was insecure about being naked and he said “i hate that you don’t see what i see, but on the other hand, i guess i’m glad because if you weren’t so insecure, if you didn’t know how hot you were, you wouldn’t be sleeping with me.”

she says they started things back up after awhile, and she told him that she had been underage when they had sex, and his response was “well, i trust you more than anyone.” and she says his “i didn’t do anything illegal” statement is bullshit.

she says she was very conflicted and initially wasn’t going to reach out to anyone or come forward because she wanted to protect him as someone she cared about, but it’s become clear he’s not a good person who does not deserve anyone’s trust or empathy.

she emphasizes that being careful of the power dynamics of boss/employee means we should also be careful of age gap power dynamics and celebrity/fan power dynamics.