._.

There's a stairway to heaven and a highway to hell, but the midnight train goes anywhere. Trains are clearly the superior transit method.

she's a 10 but she wants to stab me so that makes her an 11

ppl who hate sparkling water are wrong

hey guys im making french toast sticks in the oven. I’m gonna take a quick nap wake me up in 5 minutes so i can flip them over

Randy its been five minutes flip your sticks

snnnnzzzzz

Y'all can't handle the truth for thou art a whippersnapper ass bitch

yeah sorry I crushed your boyfriend with the flat side of my knife to release his aromas. yeah he’s in the soup now

5 ibuprofen 2 garlic

Try my recipe boy

the fact that disobeying authority is listed as a symptom of several mental illnesses is concerning LOL

do u ever miss your own energy. like damn what happened to me

no google docs you don't understand this is a sexy, necessary grammar mistake

some tabs have been open on my phone for literally 2 years they r like brothers to me

you are all sick in the head

sorry for getting attached to the white chocolate cheesecake recipe i opened in february 2020. as if its my fault