Xaph @xaphs - Tumblr Blog

With that last episode City Council of Darkness may have surpassed Never Stop Blowing Up as D20’s season most likely to have had a gas leak in the dome

#city council of darkness #ccod #d20 ccod #dimension 20 #d20 #d20 city council of darkness

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twizzlesarefake

something they don’t tell you about becoming a figure skating fan is that half your for-you page WILL be in Russian, a language you famously do not speak.

another thing they don’t tell you is that being a figure skating fan will make you seriously consider learning Russian.

knucklecurve

the issue of banning russians/belarussians was always going to end like this because the war on ukraine was being used as pretext for what they should have been banned for in the first place (the doping). isu dug themselves into a hole because obviously russia is not the only country ever to wage a war.

cornercritter

my self-indulgence. happy fucking pride.

bevsi

more Alysa Liu!! ⛸️ ✨

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haleyusesherwords

epicscizor

mythmagicetc

if your mutuals are watching a hockey game you will NOT be told:

who is winning

the score

what goalie interference is

you WILL be told:

everyone involved needs to die

sidney crosby is older and more beautiful

ode-on-a-grecian-butt

scottishstoner

Amber Glenn | Prague 2026 | Triple Axel | Triple flip into Triple toe |

sun-stardustt

"they hate to see two woke bitches winning"

amber glenn x too much

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apolloendymion

since mrs, ms, and mr are all descended from the latin word magister, i propose the gender neutral version should be mg, short for "mage"

apolloendymion

some people think this is a shitpost so i want to clarify that i am dead fucking serious. make mage the official gender neutral honorific NOW. i want it on my passport. i want it on my bank account. i want doctors and judges to use it for me. i don't care if it sounds a little silly. people thought "missus" sounded crass at first. call me mg.

apolloendymion

benefits of mg:

easy to pronounce, even for children (though kids 4 & younger may pronounce it more like "mayd" or "maygh")

ONE SYLLABLE!!! ("individual" is too goddamn LONG.) you have to be able to say it quickly and casually

ends in a soft vowel sound, so it'll flow right into the next word ("ind" halts the whole sentence)

fits neatly into the existing structure as a relative of master/mistress that can be abbreviated down to an m and one other letter

distinct enough that it can't be mistaken for either gendered term (if you call me mix I'll kill you. it sounds like miss with extra steps)

wizard.

drawbacks:

there aren't any

yes, i know about milligrams and magnesium. i don't give a shit. ms can also mean microsoft. who cares.

deadskincellsonyourpillow

Mg. [lastname]

See it just works

themaddyningtruth

I love this.

wodania

irri, doreah and jhiqui ☀️🐴

hyliaphora-cecropia

worst part of using discord with a lot of fun custom emotes is that they become an instinctual part of your texting vernacular. what do you mean i can't just drop an :ashbaby: or :bergentruck: wherever i choose. these glyphs are central to my twisted version of the written english language; communicating without them is like casting a yet-fledged angel from the heavenly balusters and commanding it to soar

jerreeeeeee

This is. Montgomery Lamontgommery. adventurer of, (coughhh coughh) gaaaaath.. i'm stranded,, here at. [COORDINATES]. This message is for Comfrey MacLeod. ........ im scaaaaaaaared.. i'm so scahahared.. i, i, hwohuh i found... yyour power station at raman.suuuuuuuuuu and i.. i saw that "montgomery knows the wayy," IIIII, I'm montgohomeryh, but i cannot find the wayhuh!! i'm, i'm on, your old shippp, with a weak crew, uhi'm, they were the weakest people i could fiiind, there's one named mmaxwell gotch with the teiniest fistss, AHEUHHsorry, i've been bitten by a crebb 🦀 AUHAHAHAHA i have to pee, i haven't eaten, hueeh comfrey find me–Faster? fa, wait, which one? (more pee!) more pee?I HAVE TO PEEEEEE,, I HAVE TO PEEHEEE!!

violentoffender

redfagdiver

I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna be scrubbed I wanna b

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little-miss-rasputin-pageant

in almost every other children's book where the main heroine is swept away to a land of whimsy she's shown having a lovely time; braving dangers occasionally, trying to find her way home, sure, but ultimately delighting in the magic around her. meanwhile alice spends her entire time in wonderland like

roach-works

look, here’s the thing: alice in wonderland’s enduring fucking charm is that it perfectly captures the vibe of being a very tired and annoyed child who is nonetheless required to play along with adult nonsense.

alice is dragged from place to place without warning, forced to play stupid games with no good prizes, grilled over her schooling and manners and recitation and dress, scolded, judged, insulted to her face, sent away, given gifts she didn’t ask for and doesn’t like, corrected incorrectly, been subject to shifting and arbitrary rules, and then when she gets snappish with all this bullshit everyone acts like a little girl’s temper is the end of the fucking world.

alice in wonderland isn’t a drug trip or a nightmare or a metaphor, that’s just what being ten years old is LIKE. that’s why kids love it so much. even if they can’t quite articulate how, they recognize themselves in it.

trans-pickles

I'm gonna go ahead and add - the reaction image is barely even a joke. This is the original illustration of her at the Mad Hatter's tea party.

look at how fucking angry she is

reineydraws

they're gonna be the coolest customers at marya's toys and trinkets and other drivel to distract you from life's tragedies: a toy store.

marya shirt closeup:

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