Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things
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@xanaduwu
Dahling you simply must read this book! It’s all about this devious little caterpillar who simply gorges himself on all manner of divine things

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This is the best ad for Project Hail Mary I have ever seen. Like if I was on the fence about watching or reading it, this would convince me to do so.
hey (with the intentions to assemble all of your ikea furniture for fun while you drink a glass of wine and admire me)
we’re really at that point in the year where no one cares about anything huh
My psych professor mentioned swaddling in lecture so I emailed him a picture of me being swaddled in my dorm room and asked if I could get extra credit because it was really hot in there and I got really sweaty and he was like “fabulous, sure”
I’m going to miss the Honors Advisor from my university.
This is definitely my favorite email i’ve recieved from a professor, with the subject line “back at it”.
one of my all-time favorite emails
hard cider was invented when someone decided to make beer that tastes good instead of bad
stupid fuckin post. People have been making beer since before they even knew how to write and you think that they don’t like the way it tastes?
damn all that time and it still tastes really bad. huge L tbh

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small town diner waitress voice: Omelas? Oh, oh no, easy mistake, you're in oh - MAY - las right now, with an A. Plenty' people get the name mixed up. Nope, no utopia here, just our small little town. *face gets really grim* We do still.. Okay well we do still have a kid that we... I mean it isn't working but- well- You know. It- It's fine. I'm sure it'll start working soon.
ALSO..some more masturbation facts about me. theres a nonsexual scene in a book where a kid gets spanked for some reason. it was set in like the 40s and he was in a boarding school i forget. but i think i either misread the scene . or maybr the author actually did write this and theyre just fucking weird. and i thought the protag got hit (with like a ruler or something). on the penis instead of on the arse. and i remember my 11 year old brain being like. i wonder why i think that would feel good.
and so my first ever "experiment" with masturbation was. slapping my dick with a ruler. and when that felt good. my first ever way of masturbating was. stacking heavy books on my penis. and then hitting the top book. so that the force was distributed down the series of books. into my penis. and of COURSE it didnt work i was punching books into my dick but it laid a strong foundation for a great gooning career . hey everyone PLEASE pretend you didnt read this post
Googled something about quick hydration and it suggested big jug of water, couple tbsp pickle juice, dash of lime juice.
Its surprisingly tasty????
Pleased to report that after a day of this i am not longer craving caper brine and my mouth is not dry as usual. There's some good suggestions in the notes too that I want to try.
-ancient roman posca: water, red or white wine vinegar, honey, salt, herbs (coriander, mint, thyme)
-switchel: water, ginger, vinegar, sweetener, lemon, salt
-ayran: yogurt, water, salt, mint
-Agua pepino: water, cucumbers, lime, sugar, optional mint.
I have been reminded of:
-shrub: vinegar, sida water, elderberry (or other berry), sugar.
I have now been informed of
-sekanjabin: honey, vinegar, mint, water.
"Wow, I wonder why this post was popular this week."
-sees the reports of the heatwave in Europe-
"... ah."
The (European) sun is a deadly laser, stay safe everyone
☝️🤓 it’s because the further you move toward the earth’s poles, the lower the angle of the sun is at the hottest parts of the day, meaning the radiation hits your whole body, causing it to feel 10-20 degrees warmer than the thermometer reading will tell you. People from tropical climes, aka close to the equator, are used to the sun’s radiation hitting a much smaller target- their head and shoulders.
Also the further you move toward the poles the more pronounced the difference between the length of day and night is. Worst part of a far-north (or south) heatwave is it doesn’t get dark long enough for meaningful cooling.
It’s not the heat. It very literally is the sun.

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nurse spottedleaf
Awesome cartoon otaku tweet
this is our pet dog and yueus she bites. get closer. go ahead. she bites
Game show called "What's Wrong With You" where a bunch of doctors compete to see who can diagnose a mystery illness (chronically ill patient whose lab results keep coming back normal despite obvious symptoms) first and most accurately. Pros:
Doctors paying off their medical loans with prize money
Chronically ill people getting free testing (MRIs, CAT scans, X-Rays, bloodwork, etc) and possibly a diagnosis
You can ding points for 'anxiety' and 'you just need to lose some weight'
Doctors are incentivized to find an answer, not just find something billable
Cons:
HIPAA
Wrong Diagnoses made because they were rushing
You can ding points for
‘anxiety’ and 'you just
need to lose some weight’
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
The term "book of the dead" doesnt really give you perspective to how big a lot of Egyptian funerary texts are.
Imhoteps book of the Dead is 64 feet long.
Okay, but a lot of books would be that long if you laid the pages out
the average printed page is 6 inches wide. so if a book is 128 pages, its 64 ft long. I dont think I own a book with fewer than 128 pages.
It's honestly not that impressive at all. Fuck Imhotep and his pathetic short book.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Forgot to close a parenthesis and now spirits enter me like a waterslide