WORDS

After re-reading a few chapters of SNK, I began realizing that Ymir and Mikasa have a lot of similarities: primarily, their belief that they are enslaved when they love. And in both cases, Eren is the one desperately trying to free them.

In Ymir’s case, we got a better glimpse of her back story in chapter 122 and saw through the narration that to survive in a harsh world, one must be good and loved by many. This was understood by helping others. So we see Ymir setting the pigs free perhaps with the understanding that she was helping them. When everyone pointed to her that she was the one who let them free, the King then did her the same favour and set her free, which led in her persecution. 

It’s been a day since SNK 138 was released and I’ve read up on a couple of theories about an alternate universe, time loops and what not. From how I understand the manga, I will argue my case for how SNK could be intertwined with time loops. 

In the first chapter of SNK, we see Mikasa saying, “See you later Eren.” Her hair in this panel is short and even. The scene then turns black and in the next few scenes, we see Eren waking up from a dream and Mikasa, but Mikasa with layered hair. Her hair is still relatively short, but is slightly longer than the first panel with Mikasa. 

One of the most important things God has taught me to do is to always ask Him, “Lord, what are You trying to teach me?”

This summer, I spent 21 days helping out with a Revelation Seminar that my youth pastor was holding. A few of us had flown out to the Philippines to assist with this evangelistic effort and there, we became quickly acquainted to rainstorms and “brownouts”, a term used to describe a power outage. Almost everyday, at around 5 PM, we would experience massive downpours of rain, which would cause relatively short periods of brownouts. However, once it would be time for the seminars to start, the rain would stop, the power would return, and we would be blessed to witness such beautiful sunsets. This almost became our expected routine, until one night, the electricity did not return.

Our team was already set up at the venue, but we were unable to run the powerpoint or even turn the mics and lights on. People from across the city were already filing into their seats and still, no power had returned. To pass the time, the leaders requested me and a few other ladies to sing hymns until the electricity was restored. And here, I prayed silently to God, “Teach me a lesson.”

So there, in the murky darkness, we began singing various hymns---ones that resonated deep with my heart and others that ran joyfully throughout the congregation. We were beginning to run out of ideas for songs when someone suggested to sing “To God be the Glory.”

To God be the glory, great things He hath done,

So loved He the world that He gave us His Son,

Who yielded His life our redemption to win,

And opened the life-gate that all may go in.

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord,

Let the earth hear His voice;

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord,

Let the people rejoice;

Oh, come to the Father, through Jesus the Son,

And give Him the glory; great things He hath done.

It was during the chorus of that song that the lights flashed back on. As the audience sang “Praise the Lord” in such melodious harmonies, the power that was once gone came back in full force, the darkness that once reigned vanished as the lights gained their glorious victory. It was a beautiful lesson that God taught me that evening: to learn how to praise Him even in our darkest moments, when the world around us seems to be thriving in His light, and we ourselves excluded and left alone, when it seems as though everyone else is being blessed by God and we instead are given a thorn to bear, those are the moments we ought to learn how to praise our heavenly Father. And in those trying moments, when we learn to praise Him above, a joy is given that nothing can steal---an everlasting joy.

“Let everything that has breath praise the Lord.” Psalm 150:6

Let me tell you about my first year in university. It all began in May, a month just before my high school graduation. I had finally mustered up the courage to tell my parents that I had prayerfully decided to dedicate my youthful years as a missionary for God. I remember eating dinner with my mom and dad and told them my “amazing” scheme.

“Mom, dad, I am not going to get post-secondary education, because I know that God is calling me into full time ministry as a missionary.”

You should’ve seen the look on their faces, but they were quite confused and perhaps displeased with the words that spilled out of my mouth. And although they were a bit puzzled with my choice, there was one more person who was even more so; me. Being able to read the looks on their faces, I began to explain myself, trying to thoroughly describe my grandiose plan of how God had called me to do His missionary work. Now that I look back, I sounded very foolish and disorganized, because I had no idea where, when, and how I would serve; but all I knew was that I wanted to. By now, I had began to tear up, realizing how I knew nothing about what my future would hold. I realized that my life was in shambles---that while my classmates were off to attend schools in different countries, study at our local universities/colleges, or even take time off to work, at least they had it all laid out before them. And here I was, watching my dreams fall apart in my very own hands, with only a month left until graduation.

My ideas didn’t sit so well with my parents, because after hearing my sudden appeal to not attend university, my mom said, “Che, you should go to university first. That way, with a degree, you can better equip yourself to serve God.”

As logical as my mom sounded---in my mind, those words translated to: Che, you ARE going to university first, because your dad and I did not raise you to simply throw away your education. You are so privileged to have an opportunity to advance your learning. Education gives us the assurance that you will get a job, which lets us know that your future will be taken care of. As parents, we’d rather place our trust in your worldly positions than to place your future in God’s hands. Working as a missionary? Do you even get paid? Will we be paying for you forever? What about when we get old? Who will take care of us? Why can’t you become a nurse or have a career in the medical field?

So with my thoughts spiralling downwards, I attempted to reason with them, “Why can’t I go to the mission field for a year and find out their need? If they need a nurse, I’ll go back to school to become a nurse, if they need a teacher, then I’ll take on education, if they need an evangelist then that’s what I’ll become. Why do you want me to go to school now?”

There was silence in the room for a few minutes. I didn’t know what to say and neither did they. It was clear to us all that I didn’t have my things in order, that I had no plan, because my plan was to simply trust in God. While that plan was the best plan in my eyes, it appeared as though my parents wanted a better explanation from me---and that, I couldn’t give.

So as time lingered on, my mom just looked at me and said, “We’ll talk when you’re ready,” which to me means: You are not ready, because you don’t have a solid plan. Talk to me when you’re willing to submit to our authority and go to university. And with that, she left the kitchen.

Now it was just me and my dad, staring at our empty plates. My dad told me to talk when I was ready and he waited. I began sobbing, wondering what the Lord had in store for me. In that moment, I remember being so lost and so unsure about God’s calling for me. I remember questioning my parents’ faith, wondering why they were so hesitant to let me follow what I thought was God’s plan, why they were preventing me from using my youthful years to serve Him at the best of my ability. I began to tell these things to my dad and he continued to listen.

After hearing my innermost thoughts, he told me something that I have never forgotten. “Che, it’s okay if you’re confused, because that’ll allow you to practice faith. Many people who don’t know what lies ahead begin to fear. But why fear when we can trust the One who already knows the way?” This right here was so powerful. I don’t know if he noticed, but as soon as he said that, I pulled out my phone and typed it into my notes.

He went on to ask me what the 5th Commandment was, which is obviously honouring your parents. Blegh. I thought, he’s probably going to go on about how I need to honour them, but why should I honour them if what I want to do is God’s will? It’s as if my dad read my thoughts because he said, “Children should follow this commandment as long as what their parents command them to do isn’t against God’s commands. But when mom and I tell you to go to University is it against His commands? I know you want to become a missionary, but who are you to tell God and limit where He uses you as a missionary? Even the university you attend can be a mission field.”

Those words sealed the deal. As much as I didn’t want to step foot on a campus or take on any mode of institutionalized higher learning, I knew that what my dad said was right. But unfortunately, since it was already May, it was too late for me to apply for the universities in my area. And it just so happened, that the only school I applied for and got accepted into was the Adventist university in my home country.