Marauders

remus lupin who hates being seen as it makes him feel anxious. remus lupin who writes to his parents every week because he's worried they'll get worried if he doesn't. remus lupin who dresses in his own knitted jumpers and cardigans and wears his dad's old brown corduroy trousers and muddy boots. remus lupin who studies so hard in fear of never being able to get a job. remus lupin who listens to old 40s and 50s jazz records because its what he grew up on. remus lupin who let's his friends do whatever they want despite his own judgement because he's worried they'll leave him and he'll be alone. remus lupin who always dreamed of travelling like his parents did when they were his age, but he was never able to. remus lupin who takes care to never be angry and always only takes the defensive. remus lupin who finds comfort in sheep and wool so much that his patronus was a sheep. remus lupin who always tried to look his best and put together, sewing the holes in his clothes and polishing his shoes, but gave up during the war. remus lupin who wants nothing more than to fit in but never quite manages to.

Imagine hearing the name Sirius Black and only thinking of Harry Potter's Godfather instead of leather jackets, crop tops, electric guitars, vinyl collections, fabulous hair, chains, rings, tattoos, piercings, motorbikes, huge black dogs and hearing 'caviar and cigarettes, well versed in etiquette' play in the back of your mind. I could never.

Ao3 is down and honestly I don’t know what to do with myself. 10 months of quarantine and I’ve always had this one constant. This one rock upon which to stand. Tonight I’m learning a hard lesson: you can’t rely on anything.

I simply could not