kidnapper: i have one of your children
steve: which one i have seven
kidnapper: the loud, annoying, rowdy kid who never shuts up.
steve: which one i have seven
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@looopylupin
kidnapper: i have one of your children
steve: which one i have seven
kidnapper: the loud, annoying, rowdy kid who never shuts up.
steve: which one i have seven

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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sirius: this is harry, my sole reason for living besides my hot werewolf boyfriend
mcgonagall: this is hermione, sheβs a smarter than all of you combined
snape: this is draco and he has rabies
sirius: hey harry how old are you?
harry: i'm 15
sirius: ha at your age i was 19
harry: what
Hermione: Why are Harry and Draco sitting with their backs to each other?
Ron: They had a fight.
Hermione: Then why are they holding hands?
Ron: They get sad when they fight.
*after accidentally losing eleven*
dustin: mike calm down, we made a map of where she might be
mike: this is a map of the entire world
dustin: yeah we have no idea where she is

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joel: i've noticed you often use humor to deflect trauma
ellie: thanks!
joel: ..that wasn't a compliment
ellie: what i'm hearing is you think i'm funny
joel: i cant tell if this is water or nail polish remover-
ellie: *shots it*
ellie: it's nail polish remover
Joel: *smashes window*
Joel: vandalism is wrong ellie
Ellie: okay
[watching James and Lily argue]
Remus: this is bad
Sirius: i know..
Sirius: I wish we had popcorn
harry: is this water or nail polish remover?
ron: *downs the entire bottle*
ron: it's nail polish remover

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*at the alter*
harry: uh, can we change the "till death do us part" line?
draco: yeah, he's not getting rid of me
harry: name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. i'll wait.
ron: you and me!!!
harry, tearing up: ok
mcgonagall: you often use humor to deflect trauma
harry: thank you
mcgonagall: i didn't say that was a good thing
harry: what i'm hearing is, you think i'm funny
harry: *seductively takes off glasses*
harry: wow
draco: *blushes* haha.. what?
harry: you're really fucking blurry
Ron: what do you call a fish with no eye?
Hermione, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons.
Ron: ...
Ron: Fsh

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*after accidentally losing Harry*
Ron: Hermione pLEASE stop yelling
Ron: here, Gin and I made a map of where Harry could be *unrolls map*
Hermione: !!!
this is a map of the eNTIRE WORLD
Ron: yeah we have no idea where Harry is
i can be funny sometimes
Yes i do plan to die on this hill