woketopus

Both of these

I know adverbs are Controversial, but “said softly” means something different than “whispered” and this is the hill I will die on.

Iceland is fucking bizarre my name change made the news

With a little legwork we can make more people on Tumblr see this than the entire population of Iceland.

executive dysfunction be like *wants to do something* *doesnt do it* *feels bad* *wants to do something* *doesnt do it* *feels bad* *wants to do something* *doesnt do it* *feels ba

I recently learnt that executive dysfunction can be broken down into two main categories: anxiety that your attempt won't be satisfactory, or confusion about where to start or how to break it down into steps. As much as we feel bad about it, it's extremely important to remember that it is NOT laziness and we in fact shouldn't feel bad.

hey reblog this instead

let me put this in terms you can fucking understand. our toddler, Falco Mewtwo Martinez, “wavedashed” straight into a “stage hazard” because you weren’t fucking watching him.

I think it's very sexy when a fictional character knows they're doomed but makes the conscious choice to keep trying anyway

op are you defending macbeth right now

Assume I'm doing whatever you think will bother everyone the most

what the fuck is this post for. its not even funny or even a meme its literally a middle school math lesson. fuck you and fuck this website

oh you don’t get it? your loss ig

It's like Mitch Hedberg said about corn on the cob. Why do we call it that, that's its natural state. That's like if you cut off my arm and called it Mitch, but then you sew it back on and call me Mitch Altogether

Is this site nothing but birdsite screenshots

okay but can i eat that

Forbidden cake

This is not a cake of honor.

No esteemed goodies are baked here

Outta the way, I'm getting me some fuckin tiramisu.

My body has been severely poisoned by radiation.

Nothing is edible here

Minimalism is just propaganda to make people accept souless surroundings

Just because something is utilitarian, doesn’t mean it can’t also be beautiful.