Different Queer Journeys: Mike vs Will
As many people have pointed out, the discussions around Mike being misunderstood or villainized by the fandom arise from a lack of understanding that
he is not oppressed for being queer (at this point in canon at least);
he likely does not even recognize his own queerness.
Unlike Will, Mike's queerness is deeply hidden, even from himself.
His character is built on subtextual hints that foreshadow his queerness, which will later serve as narrative evidence for the audience and inspire discussions on "How the show hinted Mike is gay." These hints are intended to illustrate that he is grappling with feelings and desires he has not yet consciously recognized. The cues are deliberately subtle - they aim to create confusion for the audience, mirroring Mike's own confusion. The narrative intentionally avoids explicit statements about his sexuality at this stage, allowing the audience to experience this gradual reveal alongside him.
Will's queerness is apparent even before he fully understands it himself.
He faces bullying and punishment for "breaking" gender norms at the hands of his abusive father. He is called slurs and labeled a "freak" by his peers, and even adults are not surprised by his disappearance in season 1, as we remember Troy's comments about it. This environment has created a persistent shadow of fear, shame, and self-doubt that Will must confront in Season 5.
His struggles run much deeper than his "unreciprocated" feelings for Mike. Unlike Mike, whose repressed queerness remains largely unconscious and influenced by internalized societal norms, Will's difference is forced upon him by an unforgiving environment. He must navigate both his internalized fears and the external pressures simultaneously, all while the constant threat of supernatural danger heightens the stakes of his journey toward self-acceptance.
Will's emotional arc is tied to the supernatural events around him. His queerness is not just a personal discovery - it acts as a survival mechanism woven into his heroic journey. Embracing his desires and identity becomes essential for reclaiming agency over his body, mind, and powers, ultimately positioning him as a crucial player in saving the world.
Mike is not bullied for being queer.
Mike's queerness is currently latent and subtly hinted at rather than being directly addressed as socially unacceptable. In the first episode of season 1, we don't have Karen pointing out that Ted was calling Mike slurs. Instead, we see Mike being exceptionally protective and affectionate with Will during their childhood. The script for season 2 illustrates a moment where he squeezes Will's hand to comfort him when Will is possessed by the shadow monster. This suggests that Mike is crossing the boundaries established by society, though he may rationalize his actions as being a protector and a very close friend.
When Mike starts dating El, their preteen romance feels natural to him. He admires her strength and bravery, and he genuinely cares for her. Since she "sacrificed" herself to save him and his friends in the past, Mike feels a sense of obligation to offer her care and loyalty. This makes it emotionally challenging for him to take a step back or even question their relationship at first - why would he do that when a superhero girl wants to be with him?
His intensity with El in season 3 is obviously overcompensation.
It serves as subconscious proof to himself and the world that he is "normal." Kissing can be enjoyable, and El likes it, so Mike likes it too. However, deep down, he knows that it doesn't feel like it should, and for the first time, his subconscious reveals itself with the infamous, "It's not my fault you don't like girls." This raises the question of why he would say that if he isn't projecting. Mike feels cornered - his relationship is under attack, first from Hopper and now from Will, leading him to defend it aggressively. He hurts Will not out of malice, but out of fear of looking inward and facing his own truth. Puberty hits him hard, and his body begins to betray him, undermining his ideal boyfriend persona. It's easier for him to lash out at Will with accusations like "you don’t like girls" than to confront the same possibility within himself.
At the end of season 3, there's that strange kiss that leaves him shocked. He finally gets what he thought he wanted, but it doesn't feel right. Instead of considering that he might be queer, like a lot of people believe, he thinks, "What’s wrong with me?" which feels like a safer option for him. As a result, he struggles emotionally with El later in season 4. He finds it difficult to be vulnerable and even hesitates to write "Love, Mike", because deep down, he doesn't feel what he believes he's supposed to feel. Something just doesn't click for him.
On the contrary, he knows that being around Will stirs feelings he doesn’t want to confront. His unconscious attraction to Will is revealed through soft glances, his "Will voice", and vulnerable admissions - Hawkins is not the same without Will. In fact, he is literally flirting with him, and it happens unconsciously, as it feels natural to him, and he doesn't even realize what he is doing.
But he doesn't have the time to sit and contemplate these feelings. He is too focused on his self-loathing and his obsession with El and her need for him.
He says that he feels useless and powerless in comparison to superpowered El, fearing that if she doesn't need him, he will feel like nothing. Mike doesn't believe he is worthy of love as he is. He thinks he must earn it by being the hero, the leader, the savior, or the perfect boyfriend. This mindset, along with his guilt and savior complex, is what he needs to confront in Season 5. He should realize that his role is not to "rescue" or fix El or Will, but to stand as an equal in those relationships.
Mike's journey toward acknowledging his queerness is one of self-discovery, largely internal and shaped more by social and familial expectations than by bullying. On the surface, he appears socially competent, coming from a "perfect" middle-class, Reagan-era family. No one knows or suspects he's gay. His journey focuses on self-recognition, learning to separate guilt, romantic desire, and duty, while uncovering feelings he doesn't consciously understand yet.
In season 5, I believe Mike learning that Will is gay will be a game-changer for him.
He will begin to recontextualize all their interactions - the coded conversations, the way he feels when Will is near, and the emotions he experienced when Will gave him the painting. Mike will feel a mix of attraction, fear, and relief all at once. Since he hasn't faced the same bullying that Will has, his initial reaction won't be self-hatred or shame as some might think. Instead, it will be longing. While he will surely panic about being exposed, the emotional focus will shift from "What's wrong with me?" (the culmination of season 3) to "I want him". This realization is both frightening and freeing.
He may not label his identity right away, but finally understanding what was wrong all this time will be powerful - he wants Will not just as a friend, but as someone he could kiss. Once Mike allows this subconscious truth to surface, there's no turning back. He can't unknow his desire anymore.
So Will's pain is visible - the bullying, the broken home, the town labeling him as "different." Mike's conflict, however, is hidden beneath denial and pressure to conform. Their experiences are not the same, so why diminish Will's suffering by projecting it onto Mike? Both struggles are profoundly different yet equally valid!