Inimitable_Original

“You don’t get ace people killing themselves because of aphobia”, Tea on canvas (2018)

If you ever see this please reply with @@@thetrevorproject . They are for aces to use, they have trained specfically because aces were calling. 

so confused

so lost

“I don’t know what’s going to happen if they begin to let women in baseball. Of course, they will never make good. Why? Because they are too delicate. It would kill them to play ball every day.”

Next up was the Iron Horse Lou Gehrig, who swung through the first three pitches to strike out. Jackie Mitchell became famous for striking out two of the greatest baseball players in history.

A few days after Mitchell struck out Ruth and Gehrig, baseball commissioner Kenesaw Mountain Landis voided her contract and declared women unfit to play baseball as the game was “too strenuous.”[5][10] Mitchell continued to play professionally,barnstorming with the House of David, a men’s team famous for their very long hair and long beards.[11] While travelling with the House of David team, she would sometimes wear a fake beard for publicity.”

They gave up.

They couldn’t handle it.

Losers. 

So I have recently got up to speed with My Brother, My Brother and Me, it took me about 5 months to do it but I did it! Along the way I made notes of all the best episodes I listened to. I thought this would be helpful for new fans who want to get into MBMBaM but find the extensive catalog daunting.

There’s a lot of premium goofs and I’m sorry if your favorite didn’t make the list.

39 Peepum’s Nastygum

89 Grab the Merkin 

104 I Hate You Ron

108 The Garfield Monstrosity 

109 Flapjack Nickelsack

147 The Legend of Corn Cob Boy

151 Orb is Horse

164 Gaperboy

174 Starbucks Castle Doctrine 

175 Torsey

193 Journey to the Center of the Bear

204 Bait Kids

206 Thank Travis for Travis 

211 Mrs. Doubtfire 2

215 Glass Shark

219 Pizza Delivery Clone

221 Jareth Defense Tactics

222 The Rich Kids Camp

228 Sex Draculas 

229 A Premium Swallow

234 The Legend of Cracker Barrel

242 In the Mouth of Mango

251 Cycle 2.0

253 Bye-Bye Boy

257 Swag Dads

258 OOH, MOMMY!

259 Birthday Surprise Hole

261 Island Boy Begins

261.5 The McElroy Family Fun Hour brought to you by Totinos 

265 The Ballad of Tit Liquid

269 Face 2 Face: Loose Gravy

281 Sisterball of the Dribbling Shorts

286 Coyotes Ate Our Dad

300 The Three Hundredth One 

302 Honkin’ On Bruno

304 Chicken Soup for Boys

309 Here Comes Ray Donovan

321 Which One Vapes?

326 Open-Source Burger King

333.5 The MBMBaM Guided Sleep Experience for Spiritual Harmony

340 Doritos-Blasted Crow

every girl has that little pouch of fat on her lower tummy, despite what magazines try n show u, you have important organs there that need to be protected don’t try and get rid of ur pouch

ur body is smarter than u think and it knows what to do when u eat more than normal. one bad day, or even week, of eating poorly isn’t gonna ruin anything at all I pinky promise

if u think u look good up until u try taking a selfie, it’s not ur fault - our faces are asymmetrical and when u see ur face flipped it will look unnatural to u, since u don’t see it that way when u look in the mirror. to everyone else it looks perfectly fine

no one’s stomach looks the same at 8pm as it does at 8am. no one has a chiseled six pack after a day of eating, not even the super fit people u see on tumblr, because ur stomach naturally expands after eating and expecting to have a flat tummy before bed is very unrealistic

no one notices if the bags under ur eyes are bad today. no one pays attention to the bump in ur nose or the zit on ur chin or the piece of hair that u missed when u were straightening. literally no one notices these things except you so stop worrying about it ur gonna be fine

doctor: time of death-

friend: hold on lmao i got this fam

friend: plays yorktown

me: jerks up

Humans learn foreign languages just because they can. Humans bake cookies. Humans knit sweaters. Humans ask permission to pet other humans’ dogs. Humans argue over whether ghosts are real. Humans write stories they’re too embarrassed to show to anybody. Humans eat food so spicy it makes our noses run. Humans do google searches to find out what kind of bird is making that noise. Humans build pyramids, or travel thousands of miles to look at other humans’ pyramids.