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cursed

why are there 5,000 people on this site holding back from doing something with literally zero repercussions for anyone in a world that will never remember the chances you didn’t take? don’t waste your time on this earth live your life slap some rice

Hi my job is literally to reset the shelves and honestly?? Slap that rice. Slap it good. patting down the bags makes it easier to stack more, which means when I have to do it it’ll be flatter and more settled and more likely that I can just slide it along without it slidin’ around. You are doing me a FAVOR by slapping that rice.

rice man approves

Slap that rice.  Slap it good.  Slap that ricebag just like you should.

Slap that funky ricebag white boy

forever that girl that gets really excited when the sky is in pretty colours

I thought it wasn’t possible to crack an egg in your palm like that how to fuck did he

This is a good one 12/10

this is legit my favorite vine compilation ever, i’m crying

#Erin your friend Jackie is in it and it’s a different vine than usual! – lmao omg elvira your tags are the best

Put this in the MOMA

a year later this is still the funniest video on the internet and i can’t even adequately explain why

wow

It’s a perfect blend of several major kinds of comedy: confessional, relatable observation comedy (who hasn’t had someone make an incorrect presumption based on your appearance?), absurdist prop comedy, and character comedy revolving around her looks, voice, and mannerisms. And reclining (almost) out of frame is the perfect button on the skit. It’s comedy genius.

do dogs know that they’re cute?

A while back I heard my friend (male) insult another dude by saying, “You look like the kind of guy who wouldn’t go to Wal-Mart to buy his girlfriend a box of tampons” and I still think about that crowning insult sometimes

My dad once called another guy “someone who thinks loading the dishwasher once in a while makes him less of a man”

I like your dad already

one time my dad’s boss was giving him shit for always leaving work early so he could get home and help my mom with me when i was a newborn and his boss said “i’ve never changed a diaper in my life” really proudly and my dad responded “i’d be ashamed to ever admit i was that worthless of a husband”

oh WOW

This is by far my most popular post.

$50 maybe

a dropped money clip from some clumsy, unobservant capitalist shithead with in excess of $5000 in it

a thrown silver money clip with $50 in it and an empty aladdin wallet

She was poetry, but he couldn’t read.”

His name was jarred hes nineteen

When your hair is wavy/curly sometimes there is a fine line between “messy romantic waves” and “evil witch who lives in the woods.”