Wezzazlin'

ask your doctor what the fuck

sound up.

This is one of the funniest goddamn things I’ve ever seen.

Slenderman is a tall good boy and there’s nothing wrong with tormenting and killing amateur filmmakers

What did amateur filmmakers ever do to you

I live in New York City

instead of saying “i want to kill myself” whenever something bad happens to me as a result of circumstances beyond my control i’ve started saying “i’m going to kill god” and it’s honestly done wonders for my self-esteem

you know what? 2019 mood

not to be racist but i can’t tell customers apart

The truth hurts so much, but it cannot be denied - 2 minutes after you leave my line of sight, I have no idea who you are, you’re just another arm I’ve stabbed with a needle

god I hope you work in the medical field

cronch

oh to be a round little bird and to say beep from time to time

this close to putting hot sauce on my toes

i. forgot to give context for this

what context could you possibly give that would make this any better

my cats biscuit and gravy are aggressive toe biters and they will stop at nothing to attain the experience of feet in their mouth

holy shit i have the best idea

my line of logic was “well if i put the sponge in the blender, when i turn it on the sponge will spin around and scrub the blender for me so i dont have to spend ages cleaning it”

thats not what happened though :•(

please princess™… i require your stability and happiness

People who promote juice cleanses and like Consuming charcoal literally sound like “doctors” in Ancient Greece who thought people could get “hysteria” when their uterus moved around the body at will towards and away good or bad smells like stop trying to get me to go on a liquid diet I know it’s you Pliny The Elder

Finally listened to all music! My favorite song was an untitled file called “ssssddsdrt66677888.ogg” that I found on a flash drive that I found in a landfill in Tunisia