17, She/Her, Queer, Passionate Ramblings about Everything, Textiles & Sewing, Punk Adjacent, undiagnosed but thereās something, I love art & THEATRE, does not know how to social media.
Iām Wayward Wonder Witch (she/her). Iām a high school student, Iām always between being so busy I canāt breathe and having so little to do I lose my mind.
Iām new to having a Blog but I have been in the shadows of tumblr for the last year. I am not that tech or people Savvy so a grain of salt is needed.
***Also! The best way to experience social media is to forget it exists, and I regularly forget that social media is a thing. So I do not post often if at all.
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Shows Iām into:
School Spirits
Welcome to Nightvale
The walking Dead (recently started)
Criminal minds (recently started)
CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Hadestown
Guys and dolls
Final destination
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Music Iām Into:
Sarah and the Safe Word
P!nk
Vial
Destroy Boys
Crane wives
Amazing Devil
No Doubt
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Here are some things that Iām interested in:
Punk Culture
Queer history
Disabled history
Fashion and textiles
Fahrenheit 451
Apothecary & Gardening
Theatre & Theater Tech
Sewing, Embroidery, Crochet
Dungeons and Dragons
Rollar Derby (there are none in my area tho)
Puppetry
Physical media
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*Also I may repeat the same words, sentence or idea over and over again. Though I try to revise myself well!
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I definitely think people need to be around more people that they donāt agree with. Honestly.
(TLDR: build up your tolerance to inconvenience and anger in order to build community, no one is truly your enemy, the more steady you are in uncomfortable situations the more strong your boundaries stay)
Itās obvious that people are more likely to surround themselves with people they have similarities with. But with the way that our online world/constant connection vacuum acts itās obvious that people donāt know how to deal with opinions.
Not even in the āitās just my opinion that you donāt deserve basic respect way.ā But like simple opinions.
Like. Honestly the more people spend online thinking in the same sphere that they can hide behind a screen, which has started bleeding into the world and that cyber bullying has become sort of a part of the world has caused a large intolerance for people.
I have social anxiety, sometimes itās an active battle for me to leave the house because the idea of being outside, being watched, ect.
But also I have seen that this is slowly becoming more and more of a thing. People wonāt go out and be uncomfortable, be inconvenienced, when that is something intrinsically tied to making community.
I donāt see people give kindness and patience to one another. I see people like teens being vested only in their comforts and flipping out when unsettled.
And itās not good because flipping out and being unable to know how you react in situations is not going to help. Since the separation though the screen, the separation of flipping out or avoiding others just makes things more difficult. People around me donāt seem to be able to communicate properly with others, especially when it comes to issues. It is very much a me vs world thing and it is very odd.
Like, when I was in a history class in HS, there was this kid who had this militaristic, proud, a little too into certain aspects of history, personality. He would be on the devilās advocateās side more often than not, and kids would absolutely lay into him. He was disliked, maybe even bullied, he had ADHD and loved to talk about history, often not even voicing his supposed opinions on the history. Though that didnāt matter, people deemed him a threat.
The more people lashed at him, the more he thought he was right, that he was being persecuted in that good ol southern way. But every day, every project, I would seek this kid out. Sit next to him, talk to him, ask him about his interests and opinions. I am very very openly Queer, and we do not have similar views at all. But I sat next to him every day when he recited BS that he had been taught by his parents, by his history books and podcasts.
And I was the only person in that class to actually be able to call him on his BS. To make him stop antagonizing others, and he listened to my counter arguments. Sure. It was frustrating and we would piss each other off. But that just built up my tolerance, I was able to empathize with him. I knew he had no control in his life from his boot licking, children are not people only soldiers religious family. And I taught myself how to not pick a fight, how to not cry when I feel like something is in-just. How to talk to someone like him, and win the argument.
I was able to see him as a person instead of an enemy. He changed his idea of the disability rights movement when I framed it to his point of view. He stoped saying slurs around me when I educated him. He showed off his action figures and I showed off my embroidery. He was able to laugh and talk about things that didnāt fit in his world view, since he didnāt have someone to talk to that wouldnāt be a fight.
We wernt friends but by building up my intolerance I was able to care for him anyway, im now able to take a step back and see otherās misconceptions and be able to live and talk alongside someone that no longer views me as a enemy. And building up your tolerance to small things, youāre able to have more hard, fast, and steady conversations and boundaries. You know where to draw the line, and where to talk out disagreements.
What to put on punk patches when you have no ideas!
"1312"
"Dead men don't rape"
"Trans rights"
"Nazi punks fuck off"
"Someone on tumblr told me to write this"
okay now that i've got your attention listen to me, what you're gonna do is you take your little phone, camera or notebook and you go outside and you look at the graffiti in your city and you look at all the stickers that are on lamp posts, and you're gonna photograph or write down the ones that evoke the most emotions - both positive and negative. You will then go home and look at the photos and either copy the local slogans you agree with or come up with counters to the things that made you uncomfortable or mad. You don't need five vauge anti-police patches when you can have some specific to your area and community. If you live in Poland you don't nees an "ACAB" patch, what you're looking for is "HWDP". It is instantly apparent to scene regulars if someone is an internet punk or an irl scene member just based on what wording if the same sentiment they have on them.
Look at photos of people at protests you stand for (or if you can and there's one happening soon - attend it). What's written on their banners? What slogans are short yet succinct and to the point? What's catchy? Can you make it shorter? Can you add a pictogram to visualise it? What's the sentiment? How would you carry the same meaning in your style of speaking?
Open spotify and set your location as the nearest decently sized city (or google, but google doesn't have your taste profile in mind when showing you results). See what alternative bands play there soon. Give them a listen, if you enjoy their music and can afford to, go to the concerts. While at the venue try to look for other event posters - it could just be a music spot that holds all kinds of events but it could be an actual alternative venue. Is it a bar? Maybe you can frequent it and make friends with other local scene members. Maybe you can learn what your local community issues are from them. If you can't afford to go or are underage, listen to the songs while following the lyrics. Is there a line that hits hard? A title that's a banger? An album that's super cool and just so happens to have a simple cover? Here are your next patch ideas.
If you would like to break out of the bubble of online punkism into the actual scene you gotta log off and go into the real world. Punk is about breaking from the heard and non-conformism, and by copying every cool patch you see on pinterest or tumblr you are accidentally outing yourself as someone who doesn't have their own voice. Try to find it, I bet it has some unique things to say and I wanna hear what! It should be at conversation with things happening in your immidiate community. If you live in Bosnia you won't do much to defund the LLPD, but you can make change in the enviroment you actually live in.
Punks not about repeating the same sentiments like a broken record, it's about embodying them. And I mean actually embodying not just in fantasies of heroically beating down rapists. It's calling out weird behaviour of your friend's partner or helping a survivour of abuse get safe shelter so she can report her brutal husband without fear. It's donating that 2.5,- that you saved buying soda on sale to a local lifeline. It's making life safer and better for the people in your community before you focus on oversees problems.
Omg I want to tell the world Iām so excited, I finally figured out why my knee hurts so freaking bad.
Everyone thought it was just my low pain tolerance.
Turns out my kneecap has been dislocated from anywhere from a year to a month, and I have been walking, running, going upstairs, standing for hours.
It was a struggle since I have panic attacks at the idea of being injured or (god forbid) being sick. Being Ailed and actually going to the doctor about it was a big thing.
I also believe that the majority of the time I hallucinate pain and ailments, like I think the majority of the time that everything is just in my head. Which is so scary.
And it was actually a relief that the doctor was immediately saying that there was a difference between my knees and their fluids.
I had to go to multiple doctors tho in order to get a x-ray, which I completely humiliated myself, but my legal guardian says that everyone feels dumb on a x-ray table.
And I was able to cry, have a full (kinda cathartic?) panic attack, and listen to my music all the way home. And now I have to go to a physical therapist. Which keeps getting re scheduled. Iām so happy it wasnāt in my head! Wish me luck.
I love thrifting I love ebay I love second-third-fourth hand clothes I love garage sales I love diy-ing and crafting I love giving clothes new life I love outfit repeating I love visible mending I love wearing/repairing the same item til its threads I love patches I love customization I love local libraries I love physical media I love burning cds for my friends I love shopping small!!
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As an older queer, allow me to say: the walls of the closet are load-bearing. It is our job as a community to stand in front of that door and tell everyone who wants to peek inside to fuck off.
There are so many reasons a person may choose not to come out and there is no reason a person would owe the public or a stranger that information. Certainly it's not owed simply because someone is famous.
We have fought for decades to make it safer for people to be open and authentic about themselves, but we are not yet there. And even if we were, the closet would still be something we need to maintain for those who are not ready to reveal that part of themselves.
It was really really fun to make!!! And I made sure it fit into the window (mostly)
the great thing about putting it in the window is that it gives a rainbow glow and it wonāt get the Christian south Treatment, ie: stolen or burned.
But also, I know it seems like the south is this big monster that will eat queers alive, but I am telling you that, at least Texas, is not as scary as you think.
Everything is going to be ok, I know that the media says that if you are so much as holding hands w/ your partner that you will be run out of town but honestly, I believe that these are a scare tactic to separate us and make us hide so they donāt have to be uncomfortable.
People will not look twice, and those who do are looking twice are not worth your time.
Still stay safe, but you are loved by the trees and the clay, by the cows and humidity, by the water and the sun.
We have always been here and no rocks or stolen flags are going to change that.
God it is so freaking hard to translate what people expect socially, especially online.
In the real world I can focus on the way people do or donāt respond, or like Iām ok with them thinking Iām weird, because everyone gives people a little bit of grace if we fumble socially. But online?
In texting and discord and tumblr and all the other social medias, there is unreadable subtext. And I try to search online to see how to convey to the masses, and at most I get a business explaining marketing, marketing that I already know.
Like Iām this close to starting a like blog? That is āhow to peopleā because I feel like I am so behind when it comes to being social, because I canāt socialize online, and my peers canāt socialize in person.
And I feel like even though I want to just put my thoughts and be weird on this app like most peopleā¦ I just canāt? And it sucks.
Also????? The cultural differences of online spaces are always combining and merging, one second something is a big No and then the next itās funny? And it is like:
āYour mom kicks puppies. She also snorts candle wax.ā
And it will be like saying someone is a murderer bring them to the square we will burn them like a witch.
THEN THE NEXT SECOND IS:
āYour mom kicks puppies. She also snorts candle wax.ā
Omg so funny, same platform, but this is so funny, even though there are no big differences between the people and they have the same wording.
ā¦
People give me some irl third spaces rn, please get off thou phone and just talk to someone random.
keep thinking about how I wrote in my dissertation about how every time a new form of public/social space emerges it's immediately popular with kids and teenagers who see it as a chance at freedom and then adults colonise it and kick them out. this happened with malls in the 80s and diners in the 50s and pool halls in the 20s. my dad was doing research on this trend in like 1975. and I was like "yeah so this is going to happen to the internet" and then five years later every government suddenly decided to ban kids from everywhere online. I hate being right especially when I don't even get paid for it
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Been housebound since I got home from the hospital so ive been making a blanket to kill time. Crutches arrive tomorrow and i hope that'll do enough for the pain to let me out of the house.
Im one ball of yarn in and im increasingly worried I might not have enough but thats an issue for future me. Never done a project this big, hoping ill actually see it through instead od abandoning it and leaving it to rot in the WIP bin.
undiagnosed autistic people will be like "I don't get upset when my routine changes though!!" and it's because they've built a set of if-then loops in their head to pick from one of 6 different strict routines and they do get incredibly upset when they're unable to keep to any of the 6 scripts. I'm john normal
Maybe my one week therapist, close friends, teachers, neibors, special ed paras and random kids in my school were right about meā¦ Nahhhā¦
ill just do my same 3 projects I do everyday and freak out when I finish one of them until I find another project, and continue to eat the same 3 lunches I have ate since 4th gradeā¦ hmmmmmā¦ maybe Iāll even spice it up and do something āspontaneousā and do something I had thought over for a week in advance and completely planned out the steps forā¦
Post is so relatable, even though I am completely neurotypicalā¦ perfect way to phrase how I actively think.
Listen to me. I am grabbing you by the face. You can. I need you to lock in. You can do it. You don't need expensive or brand new pants. Thrift a pair of pants. Get a pair your friend doesn't wear anymore. Ask around to see if people are getting rid of their clothing. There are pants. I promise. Okay. Get a plain shirt. Get some plain fabric. Same routine. Old shirts. Friend shirts. Old sheet. Cheap thrift shirt. Promotional tote bag you got two years ago. Hey. Look at me. You're doing great. You do not even need paint and a paint brush. You can get an acrylic paint pen. Write something on the fabric. Anything. Fun saying. Pronouns. Political opinion. Song lyrics. Anything. Cut out the fabric. Slap it on the pants. The hardest part is the sewing, but you are being so brave. It is thread through hole, then needle in and out of fabric. YouTube is your friend. Don't have thread? I've only ever used dental floss. The kind you can get at any store. It doesn't have to look good. It's not supposed to. The point is that you did it. You can do it. Hey, look at me. You can do it. Make the pants.
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I have gotten absolutely OBSESSED with CSI: Crime Scene investigation (2000-2015) once again!
Iām re watching the series since I havenāt actually watched the whole thing back to front! I started with the miniature killer and have jumped around the series a bit but Iām pretty sure Iāve watched all the episodes (except afterlife but Iām saving that until Iāve fully watched it all back to front)
It has ABSOLUTELY taken over my life! Iāve been watching it 24/7 and itās actually a joke in my family that instead of doing things in hours I do it based on episodes,
(I.e if I want to get a lot done in the day I will set a timer for 45 min or start a episode and by the time itās done I should be done with my project or if I have to wait a long period of time I dumb it down from 3 hours to 4 episodes ((it actually works wonders when Iām trapped between projects/procrasting)))
I have been trying to talk about it FOR EVER but everyone I know doesnāt even know about the show :(
Iām planning to make a series of zines about CSI to spread at my local library, since why not yell into the void! (Post zine photos eventually)
I actually have like doubled down on my interest in it like I found the comics and ordered them today and me and my mom got matching T-shirts a few years ago, which we spiced up with some bleach to look like blood splatter! (Canāt find photos)
And I have a lot of plans to make little stuff like how I made this jack-oā-lantern CSI themed.
me, reaching into my dresser drawer for black pants: I hope this isnāt the pair with big holes worn in the inner thighs
Marie Kondo, gently over my shoulder: why is a pair of pants you find unwearable still in your dresser drawer
me: oh shit thatās right!! The dresser is for clothes that under some circumstance I might conceivably wear!!
Marie Kondo, beaming proudly: Yes, thatās correct!! These pants must have been your favorites. How wonderful that they were so comfortable and practical that you wore them out. But now since they no longer function as pants, you should move them from the drawer where you keep your functioning pants!
me: Yes thanks I got it theyāre in the fabric basket now
Marie Kondo, fading back into the darkness: I love what youāve done with the kitchen!!
