Neighborhood Bridge Troll

the paper is warm because the printer just layed it

ship of theseus bumper sticker that says my other ship is this ship

I had a dream that a bunch of people were making jokes about how the economy was so bad that gay people couldn't afford closets and were just "in the corner"

this sucks so bad i need to [remembers suicide jokes only worsen my mental health] put on the best talent show this towns ever seen

why he posing like hes willem dafoe doing a photoshoot

Fictional Vic Michaelis from VIP is unironically one of my favorite characters at the moment. They’re an asshole. Every night they’re visited by a merchant of death in their dreams. That’s the only form of therapy they seem to get. They have a complicated relationship to their ex-step grandmother. They wear the same suit to work every day. They’re not great with inflection. Interviewing is all they know how to do. They wish they were doing more important television. They share a two-bedroom apartment with their husband and their step daughter. An alien is living in their guest house. They cry frequently. They kissed a sentient puppet. They’ve fired so many employees. They’re trapped in a time loop (possibly). Truly the person of all time

welcome back to gamechanger, the only gameshow where the game changes every show! players, you will notice that we are standing in a prison, and that some of you have been designated as “guards” while the rest of you are “prisoners.” over the next few months y

my favourite button ever is "open link in new tab"..

staying close w people long distance really is about the mundane stuff. i get texts like "made quesadillas" "spilled mop water all over the floor :(" "lady on the bus has not one not two but three tiny dogs in her purse" andits like wow. i love you more than words can express

they shouldve made it impossible to post new videos to tiktok after this one was made and also they shouldve made it so every other video was just this video