awooga

loud warning

Rolling on the floor sobbing and crying and losing my mind at “GET INSIDE THE VAAAAAAAAAAN”

today I found out my mother doesn’t know what dandelions are and now I’m wondering what other strange secrets she’s been quietly harboring

Where do you live that you don’t have dandelions?

we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation

See, folks in the southern US will tell you up and down those are buttercups, actually.

Wait I thought those bigger cup ones were Easter Lillies???

They’re marigolds and I know a bitch when I see one!

….we need to start taking the phrase “go touch grass” more literally. go outside and examine a flower i beg u

*squints* is that a motherfucking EVENING PRIMROSE?!??

#amazing work everyone hit the flowers

hey patrick can you see my feet

Yeah spongebob look at mine I’m facing the toilet

Patrick we have penises and were peeing with them

Excuse me ladies, everything you’ve just said about being spongbeob and Patrick and having penises you pee pee with has been echoed and amplified down the hall, were we are holding a Sunday school class. We all have heard what you’ve said about peeing towards the toilet with your penises, and I am just letting you know.

proposing a new genre of fiction called an anti-romance where u r presented w a couple at the start & the story is about their emotional journey towards a catastrophic break up

will they won't they (end this farce). there's only one bed (but for some reason they don't really want to share it). out of context eavesdropping (that paints the relationship in a better light than it deserves). chasing after them to stop them getting on that plane (and stopping them from finally being free)

nobody understands my vision i don't mean any old story where a relationship fails and it's tragic or w/e i mean a story where the intention is for the audience to root for it failing the same way u root for it succeeding in a romance. & when the relationship finally implodes at the climax of the story it's all very cathartic & everybody cheers.

like have u never wanted a fictional couple to break up so badly it hurt?

thinking about the plur lifestyle

thinking about the plur lifestyle boys

whats plur

PEACE LOVE UNITY RESPECT: THE RAVER’S CODE

*thinks about the plur lifestyle*

transmasclemore. is this anything

is anybody out there?

Who’s trying to be the transfeminem to my transmasclemore? #tf2

gotta love people immediately backpedaling when they realise that there are Consequences To Being Mean

I genuinely believe that part of why it has become so normalized to be openly callous and evil in politics is that customer service culture has trained affluent people that they can treat everyone they consider beneath them however they want and still be treated kindly.

every time someone realizes they dont have to pick between being a boy or a girl an angel gets its wings btw. and also extremely loud cheering can be heard in the distance from me specifically