[Insert Blog Title]

statements like "It's wrong to masturbate about a person without their consent" and "It's wrong to do something that quietly arouses you while you are in public even if no one can see it" show that a person's understanding of morality basically involves magical thinking. like I wrote this post on the toilet. That's not the same thing as me literally shitting on you

you guys do realise walking doesn't actually move you anywhere right? it just destroys you entirely and places a perfect copy of you right in front of where you were standing

You know how we call things "pseudoscience"... the media analysis that's being done on twitter and tumblr should be pseudohumanities

they got married btw

sometimes you just gotta listen to music at a volume that you know will be part of the cause of your hearing loss at the age of 28

hey yall. im 25 now and i already have tinnitus <3 dont do this. LOL

oh btw for those saying “i already have tinnitus haha it cant get worse” YEAH IT CAN BITCH! if you want to listen to music loud do it on speakers at least. headphones will Beam Pain Waves Directly Into Your Cochlear Hair Cells and a 10kHz Tone Loud Enough Will Give You Psychic Damage Forever

hey im in the last week of being 28 now and i dont believe this no more i think we should all passivey hurt ourselves for fun

press the teleport button to come over to my house and eat a bagel on the porch with me rightnow and you will earn 5 gems

I may be late, I have to watch this king free himself from some sort of jail by matching 3 gems and it’s going poorly

i suggest training

Whatever you do, don't do it alone. Organization and training are needed.

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears