Chaotic Dumbass

I missed my chance to reblog this in 2019, so I googled the next day Halloween would be a Thursday and Godbless if I’m still active on Tumblr in 2024

hey girl your pussy is awesome, where did you get it installed?

between my thighs

if an app pauses my music under any circumstances I should be sent a written apology from the developers

instead of killing myself i will watch documentary about the ocean

some big guys down there. Huge. they don't know about the economy

Yup im just another homo loser with no hope for future i guess i should just wash my ass all day,like a stupid fuck

god i'm so tired of everybody's bad faith interpretations of everything. where's the trust. where's the forgiveness. where's the understanding that most things are complex and most people have many layers. and like the black eyed peas once said. where is the love

Comforting a drunker person while drunk feel like what I imagine it would be like to comfort a dying soldier on the battlefield

Yeah you're right. It WOULD be pretty fucked up if you were a swan but you were raised by ducks and you grew up never seeing another swan or even knowing that such a thing as a swan even existed so you just thought you were a duck with something super wrong with it.

i love the specification of "alive" in the people magazine "sexiest man alive" award. clearly they're worried about ötzi the iceman sweeping the competition. as they should be.

forgot my night time garlic bread in the oven for the length of 2 mythbusters wpisodes and when i opened the oven door it was so thoroughly cremated that i was blinded not by smoke and ash but what surely must have been its Soul as well

Hey weather app quick question what does “106% humidity” MEAN

i don’t lose hyperfixations they just go dormant until I hear something about it like a sleeper agent