AAAAHHHHHHHHH

JackHoltz AU they booked a couples cooking class on a whim and are still stubbornly going despite having been broken up for months because A. the instructor’s short & competent & therefore very hot so Jack’s into him and Holster’s a good wingman (ha) and B. there’s another guy taking the course, except his girlfriend has mysteriously stopped showing up, and Holster desperately wants to oh sorry accidentally brush fingers as they reach for the last bottle of olive oil

#exes who wingman each other is a very funny dynamic#Holster: hey I need some help over here my burner’s too warm#Bitty: oh! Okay let’s get that checked out#Holster: oh jk. It’s just Jack ;) but while you’re here you could check him out#Bitty (internally): are they. looking for another chef in the kitchen or—#meanwhile Jack: my ex wants to crack your eggs for you#Rans: is that an innuendo or ?#Jack: one would hope so

so glad year 5 (frogs) is going to feature HOT WILLIAM POINDEXTER. huge day

something something about how maxwell needs the rules of gentleman fisting and The Max to keep his identities separate and torse literally has two different hearts that keep his personable side and his violent side separate

10-year check please fandom reunion happening at the heated rivalry

ransom and holster samwell golf course lawnmower summer forgotten storyline I am in your walls

i think all the time about the lardo/shitty smut n wrote for one of the huddles where lardo was like “can you stop being such a fucking feminist and just FUCK ME ALREADY”