lauren

smoking the shit that turned the clock wise

"you don't like mpreg?" i don't even like fpreg

OK so im a frog and the water is warm now. i swear it was cold a while ago but now its warm and i dont know when or why. But it's probably not gonna get any warmer

If you become friends with someone they might offer you shelter or sources of protein

washing machine time to human time converter online

this is why everyone on this website is a virgin

I’m not gonna fuck the telemarketer man

“make friends” who am i doctor franking stein

it was nice seeing you at the devil's sacrament

just another long hard day of contributing to low birth rates

careers.com/creepingaroundquietlyinthedark

Bahh. I see how it is. When the dangerous crow boy eats plastic he's 'doing great' and 'doing his job', but when I, the humble housecat...!

Fuuuuck dude I got drunk last night and tried to take down the villain on my own and now he’s texting me some ‘I’m the only one allowed to defeat you’ shit bro what do I do

Man he just yelled ‘I want him alive’ to his goons, it’s so over.

thinking about the character a lot today. call it pondering my blorb

I think all computers should have cd slots and all phones should have headphone ports send tumble

the thing is.. it is the humidity that gets you...