So I asked my best friend (a non-reader) to explain the All For The Game characters to me based SOLELY on pictures of them, and it was the most accurate one yet…
Seriously, look.
Gotta love jenson…
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
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@ultimatebookworm13
So I asked my best friend (a non-reader) to explain the All For The Game characters to me based SOLELY on pictures of them, and it was the most accurate one yet…
Seriously, look.
Gotta love jenson…
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

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neil abram josten being the most unhinged narrator of all time: a compilation
IVE BEEN WAITING ALL YEAR TO POST THIS YOU DONT EVEN KNOW
I’m crying.
i scheduled this a year ago..
Scheduling for every year
October can’t come soon enough
This has been in my likes since last year. It is time.
This is the 21st night of September skeleton. He only appears once a year.
October can’t come soon enough
This has been in my likes since last year. It is time.
This is the 21st night of September skeleton. He only appears once a year.

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The only reason there are pyramids in Egypt
is because they are too heavy to be carried to the British Museum
jeff this isn’t a joke this is legitimately true
sorry I'm not trying to make fun of you I'm just neurodivergent so I copied all of your speech patterns and mannerisms subconsciously. do you still like me
"why are you always talking in different accents?" I have adhd, brian
"Why do you inflect like you're giving a speech on tv?"
Because I learned tone and inflection from tv
literally every time i spoke i sounded like an exaggerated disney character 🤚😔
shoutout to all the people in the notes who are realizing they might be neurodivergent
I unintentionally picked up a ton of Mulaney mannerisms and idk how I feel about it
One driver already quit and NASCAR responded with basically “we had to google you because nobody knew who the fuck you were”
Nascar started because they said fuck cops and its nice to see they havent lost their roots completely.
That is the sexiest thing a corporation ever said.
Strange I am begging where is that one shitty story about vampire romance where the girl is a virgin so she’s “too pure” and she burns the vampire’s pp when they do it. I cannot find it and my friends don’t believe it exists.
type 'crucifix nail nipples' into google like i did, coward.
uh
@thebibliosphere
i think
Here, anon: https://thebibliosphere.tumblr.com/post/140364171806/crucifix-nail-nipples
“why bother writing bisexual characters if they just end up in a m/f relationship”
my dude
my guy
my pal
stop talking forever
Oh I have never reblogged faster in my life
Watching my bi friends’ identities get erased when they‘re in m/f relationships makes me think it’s even MORE important to write bi characters in m/f relationships and then be REALLY BLATANT about the fact that one or both of them is bi.
I had a bi friend who was dating a girl and when he said anything about being bi she would laugh and say “that doesn’t matter cuz you’re with me”. Never been so happy to hear a friend broke up with a partner
As a bi woman who’s in a m/f relationship, who’s favorite oc is a bi man in a m/f relationship. This is very important to me!
husband kissed me this morning and murmured “mlm/wlw solidarity[1]” which is frankly the entire point of bi folks of different genders ending up together
[1] pronounced mlem and wooloowoo
oh my god the Owl and the Pussycat were bi

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Remember when Neil and Andrew first met? And how Andrew had hit him with a racket and Neil had fallen?
In a way, you could say Neil had fallen for him
HAHA, IM SO FUNNY
i hate when people say “tell me about yourself” like bitch my personality changes with whatever book i’m reading because i absorb the personality of the protagonist idk what to tell you
David 'dad' Wymack things
"how did you get into my house?" (said in varying levels of pitch, at various times of the night)
"why did you get into my house?"
"yes you can spend the night" or alternatively : "please, make yourself at home" said sarcastically after child has already made themselves at home
not paying attention to the foxes conversation until he realizes that he was just used as an example of bad fashion choices by the team for Neil ("what's wrong with this shirt?" "er-nothing coach. it's just...not Neil's style")
having a record player in his office and getting made fun of for his music taste
"the kids"
"coach do you like my new haircut?" "hm?" "my hair?" "what about it?" "it's new" *stares hard* "yeah...yeah it's very pretty"
being caught off guard in the midst of a speech by one of their comments that was actually funny and breaking character
on that note- finding out that it's something of a game between them to get him to break whenever they can
"for the last time guys, no we cannot change the team color. yes i asked, multiple times, yes i know it messes with your 'aesthetic', it does mine too, no there's no one else I can talk to"
*stumbles through three other names before he gets the person he's actually trying to talk to*
"coach we brought you those chocolates you like" "really? i- no we're not cancelling practice today, nice try. go get ready. leave the chocolate"
*examines kid closely* "are you high?" "no coach" "your eyes are bloodshot" "yes coach" "...why are they bloodshot?" "long story short, it's exams season and i haven't slept in nearly sixty hours" "minYARD-"
hearing one of the kids casually mention something that happened to them when they were younger or catching a glimpse of scars he had forgotten about and remembering just who they are and what they've gone through and getting angry all over again
*furrows brows*
dressing up for sports banquet and getting "coach? is that really you?" from the boys and "aww coach you look so nice" from Dan and Renee and *stands up, walks over to him, straightens his tie, brushes off his shoulders, wipes away a pretend tear, fake whispers an "I'm so proud"* from Allison. every single time
"[FIRSTNAME MIDDLENAME LASTNAME]
holding his breath every time one of the kids doesn't get up right away after getting knocked down on court
worrying about them 25/7 but keeping his distance because he never wants to overstep (and asking Abby or bee to make sure one of them is okay instead, if he feels like something is wrong)
"DO I NEED TO SEPARATE YOU TWO?"
recognizing more pop culture references than he'd ever think himself able to, thanks to one Nicky Hemmick
"coach when you were younger did you have..." "how fucking old do you think i am?"
but still uses "back in my day" stories and just gets blank looks and polite nods back
*to himself while the monsters are arguing furiously* "i thought they spoke Spanish..."
"hey coach so i was wondering-" "get your ass back on court"
also literally just "get your ass" for everything: "get your asses showered and on the bus in half an hour" "get your ass out of my office" "stop bleeding all over me and get your ass to abby now"
getting offended by the increasingly transparent attempts at bribery
so. goddamn. many. #1 dad/coach gag gifts (he keeps them all)
"above my pay grade above my pay grade above my pay grade above my pay grade above my-"
additionally: *sees some kind of conflict* *turns around quickly* "not my problem not my problem not my problem not my problem not- oh fucking hell"
visibly thawing whenever he sees the kids bonding or having each others backs at banquets or getting over something or just showing any signs of healing
pacing in front of Abbyy for half an hour while ranting either about the kids or for the kids or on their behalf
"hey you, YOU. come here. how do I take a...a screenshot on this thing?"
replaying "that is enough" and every moment like it that came after in his head
pretending to have a frozen heart but tearing up out of pride on so many occasions: every graduation, giving Neil a side-hug and realizing after how far he came, seeing Neil and Kevin's faces the first time they have a proper holiday, watching Kevin walk out with his queen tattoo for the first time, seeing all the foxes packed together in the lounge freshly showered and exhausted but quietly brimming with happiness and pride after winning at the end of tkm, etc, etc, etc. and, whenever he gets caught: "aw coach you do care, you're a sap" *aggressively wipes face* "shut your bitch ass up, you terror"
*gruff voice* I'm proud of you, kid
*choked up* thanks Coach
You know what is absolutely hilarious about aftg?
For the first half of the series, Andrew - noted pop culture nerd who loves dropping film and book references - flirts with Neil like he's the villain in a villain-hero dynamic, filled with all the sexual tension and romantic undertones that are hallmarks of the trope. But Neil - poor, oblivious, demi Neil - is just. Not. Picking. Up on it.
And Andrew is so frustrated, because HOW can Neil not realize that Andrew has been flirting with him like every queer-coded villain flirts with the protagonist in every movie?? Doesn't Neil understand the subtext?? The innuendo?? The tension??
No, Andrew eventually realizes. Neil does not understand. And so Andrew finally cracks and just tells Neil up front that he'd like to suck his dick like the disaster gay that he is.
Andrew put a thumb to the corner of his mouth and dragged it along his lips to erase his smile. “That sounds like an accusation, but I didn’t lie to you.”
That scene in the first book at Wymack’s apartment
(pt 1/pt 2)

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yOu KnoW, i GeT iT
Choose your fighter
Um I’m choosing the second one bc Perry the Platypus is a skilled fighter and the other one is??? Some platypus with a beard???
I’ve never seen this show but from the jokes I think I’ve learnt enough about it understand them. Like:
1. Perry kicks this dudes ass
2. This scientist dude had a shitty childhood, his parents missed his birth, but he treats his daughter well
3. He also trauma dumps onto Perry
4. Off the last, Perry might just be a strange type of therapy tbh
5. Perry has an alter ego, but I can’t tell which one is the alter one (like his true self is the smart one and the the dumb one is a cover, but idk)
6. There’s a big tower which I’m 83% sure the scientist lives in.
7. The scientist once made perry pay for his broken door he kicked down, which leads me to conclude Perry is strong as fuck and the scientist is stingy (aka smart).
8. Idk the scientists name but it has doof in it, which might fit is character considering he seems to be beaten by a platypus enough to make a show about it.
I honestly don’t know any other characters than Perry, the scientist and his daughter
why is this so funny to me fhsjfbskdn
ONG ITS FROM PHINEAS AND FERB??!
I knew of the show, and I knew some stuff like they make things, annoy Candace, the quiet guy got the hottie.
I just never knew they were the same shows. I even remember seeing these screenshots of phineas and ferb buying Perry but I assumed it was a crossover for some reason. Idk why, they just seemed to have too much going on to fit into one show.
why is this even funnier jfhdskjhfas