Random's Blog

Sometimes you get a brief glimpse into the American worldview and decide that you don't want to know.

I cannot stress enough that this meme is entirely literal. there's no reference or subtext you don't know. these are simply the objectively most popular works of art from each denomination.

honestly for all we know it probably feels good as fuck to have sex

I am shocked at how many people don't have an actively hostile relationship with advertising

why hasn't no one posted the kringlefucker yet. you guys used to love the kringlefucker.

Mrs. Claus is less a person and more a sort of extension of Christmas itself. She's like the Plain Doll in blood borne but for Christmas. You CAN fuck her, but she is mainly there to be a Christmas mentat for the current Santa.

Being Santa gives you superhuman powers but it DOESNT make you immortal. And if you kill Santa, you become Santa. But if you EAT Santa, you get his powers without his responsibilities. But Mrs. Claus will hunt you.

If you bite Santa without finishing him, you become a Christmas renfield. You become addicted to the taste of Cringleflesh and unable to sleep until you have either consumed all of Santa, or died.

does anyone want to see a really good picture of my kitty cat

not a cat, first off

snale

does anyone want to see a really good picture of my kitty cat

Not yet bro

oh sorry

maybe being loved and cared for would fix me

nevermind. crow army

What they don't tell you about Crow Army is that it's a lot of effort to maintain. Earlier today I went out in the freezing rain with a screwdriver to tighten up the screws on the platform so it stops wobbling when it has multiple crows on it. Here I am in the kitchen cutting up apples and grapes at 10pm to put in the feeder before I go to bed because it's going to snow overnight and I want my army to have a nice breakfast ready when they show up at dawn. They eat five pounds of peanuts a week. The pet store down the street has been giving me a 10% discount on peanuts because I'm buying so many. My neighbors want to know what their names are.