Hi im homu

happy pride month guys! you know what that means @the-real-list-of-ominous-threats !!

Do you. Do you want me to make gay threats? What?

im a gay threat!

B. Backup?

on a road trip with my dad. he’s blasting 5sos’s Entire Discography at insane levels and and singing every song word for word. Every Song. the rocks. kiss me kiss me. don’t stop. wildflower. voodoo doll. talk fast. not ok. she’s kinda hot. he knows them all. there are no skips. he’s drumming on the steering wheel.

tried to tell him we were passing the historic spot where the suspension infamously broke on ted nivinsons 2002 toyota tacoma during the rainforest cafe road trip and his response was to crank up the volume on youngblood

accusing people of lying for clout on this website is so funny this is literally the most useless platform to be popular on. the only reward is hate mail

a car you used to drive can also be a kind of dead wife

all i need is a sweet treat. and six thousand dollars

yo mr white can you sign my permission slip so i can go to the aquarium bitch

jesse. you need money to enter jesse.

yo mr white can i have $5 to go to the aquarium it's for school bitch

jesse. do you want some money for the gift shop jesse.

yeah mr white. can i have money to get lunch there too please. bitch

of course jesse. bring me back a cuttlefish plush jesse

you got it mr white

thank you jesse

You guys ever see a DNI that makes you break out into laughter and almost cry

i was meant to be a 500 year old tree

it's meee I'm your guardian angel hiiiiii 😇 okay🙏 so. in about six months, you're gonna die of starvation. 🥺 and if I don't protect you, I will get: #fired! 🫢 and that is No Good 🙅‍♀️ hahaaa So. 🙏 I looked into causes of starvation, and it turns out: Your death is totally preventable! 😯 Uh oh! 😆 There's more than enough food to sustain you without interfering with anyone else's survival, but you're not allowed to have it! 🤨 Whaaat? 🤷‍♀️ Apparently, your death is premeditated by thousands of things called "shareholders." So. 🙏 I've been killing people,

gar field? that’s not where they’re supposed to be

oh wow… how serene…