Personal Gains

y'all will circlejerk yourself to the mysticisms of faeries and elves in european countries for centuries and take it as fact but the second native americans ask you to respect our spirituality and culture suddenly you're all aetheists

non natives can, should, and will reblog this.

same goes for african rooted religions.

goes without saying, but also Asian and Pacific Islands' indigenous spiritualities and religions.

They get misted with water throughout the thing, and it results in fewer injuries than the 'ladder' method. Also, it's a fish. It never knows what's going to happen to it at any point in time throughout its life.

"a mammal"

The other day I went to McDonald’s with my family and the guy who took my order was really loud and was basically like “HAPPY HOLIDAYS WHAT CAN I GET YOU” and I was like wow I can’t let this guy outmatch me so I yelled “I’LL TAKE A HAPPY MEAL WITH THE NUG NUGS IF I MAY” you know, like a natural well-adjusted epitome of adulthood 19 year old and he was like “CERTAINLY WOULD YOU LIKE THE MIGHTY KIDS MEAL INSTEAD WITH EXTRA FRIES” and I was so sleep deprived I essentially blacked out and apparently leaned over the counter like I was robbing the place, raised my eyebrow like a suave robin hood and said “HECK YES I WOULD GOOD SIR” and then I sat down and he yelled from across the store “WOULD YOU LIKE THE PURPLE OR BLUE SPIDER-MAN” and since purple is the more superior color that’s how I answered and long story short my parents think college changed me and that I’m now the poster child for being social and I’ve only been asked once why I’m not in a relationship yet but I know it’s gonna be brought up again and how do i tell my parents it’s because whenever I eat in the dining hall I spend the entire time playing bumper cars with the wheeley chairs and all I eat is pixie sticks and the last time I was in the library (where I’m supposed to work next semester, deAr GoD) I ripped my leggings in the bathroom pulling up my pants and I walked the entire 20 mins back to my dorm with my neon underwear peeking out from the holes like a 17th century harlot with a cocaine addiction and I’ve essentially been living off jars of peanut butter and the soundtrack to the bee movie for the past year

there’s more information in this post than there was in the library of alexandria

op did you breathe typing this because I didn’t while reading it

That’s all you need

Bananas, tomatoes, watermelons, coffee, cocoa, pomegranates and pumpkins are also berries.

W-what????????’

WHAT DO YOU MEAN POMEGRANATES ARE BERRIES????

You know what isn’t a berry? Strawberries. Fuck fruit scientists.

hey is everyone ignoring the part of the dream where bees and beekeepers fucked

once i had 2 let it rip so bad in class like i could not hold it in any longer . so i was like ok . it feels like a slient one . no1 will notice . so i did it n damn  .. man ive never smelt one so bad .. i couldnt believe it came from me . n u could trace the smell bc evey1 was looking back at me .. n the teacher was like ok . who farted . damn  why are u asking . u kno no is going 2 say shit just shut up n open the window  im abt 2 die .. n every1 turned backk 2 me n so much shit was going thro my mind then.. i was like the hell am i going 2 do . so i turn back 2 the kid sitting behind me n im like “clyde . thats so fucking nasty im abt 2 die. “ that was os evil of me .. damn i felt bad for clyde bc he was getting the worst of it . sitting behind me .. in the area of danger

World Heritage Post

my econ teacher has been trying to teach about scarcity by having a limited amount of graph paper available for students who don’t have any (she has the last few pages in a pad and when it’s gone, it’s gone) but it’s very undercut by the fact that i have a whole pad and i’ll let people have a piece whenever they need it

she’s teaching scarcity, you’re teaching the value of sharing a resource when you have enough to spare

YES EXACTLY!!!!!

She's also the person that creates the need for the paper for assignments in the first place

I’m a dude, LMAO. :p

this post makes me thankful that the world didn’t end

self care is drinking directly from a puddle in the taco bell drive thru

One time when I was like 7 I was eating a baby bottle pop and I inhaled the powder and I was suffocating so my mom made me get out of the car and drink from a puddle in a Walmart parking lot

your mom needs to be arrested

I just alternate between ‘maybe I’m smarter than I give myself credit for’ and ‘maybe I’m dumber than I realized’