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@town-without-me
please don't follow if i don't follow you first.
if we are mutuals, please tag suggestive / nsfw posts including sex jokes. i have all of the possible tags filtered but you can go with "suggestive" or "sex mention".
pfp source: blue archive
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no one cares that you shave your legs because of sensory issues shut the fuck up forever
really galling amount of people misinterpreting this post so i'd like to clarify. i'm saying that when discussions about patriarchal beauty standards and the way women are heavily shamed and coerced into eschewing their own natural state of being (hairy) are occurring, it is unhelpful (AT BEST) to interrupt and say that the reason YOU remove the hair from your body is because of sensory issues. that's not what we're talking about. stop asking for validation for doing something that society at large wants you to do. stop derailing the conversation because you feel uncomfortable about being made aware that you, for whatever reason it is, adhere to harmful, unfair and ridiculous beauty standards. you're stepping into the middle of an important conversation that needs to be had and making it all about you. shut the fuck up forever.
also quite frankly i think a lot less people would experience sensory issues if they let their hair grow out so that it isn't bristly and rough and irritating. and i cannot help but wonder why these sensory issues aren't as predominant in men. maybe you're uncomfortable with the hair on your body because you've been taught to be uncomfortable with it. just a thought.
"It doesn't matter if you're autistic, people will dislike you if you don't act normal-" yeah we noticed. The problem at hand generally isn't that we don't know that people judge individuals who fail to fit in, it's that fitting in isn't always a choice people can effectively make
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Like I just feel like a concerning amount of social skills advice for autistic people is written with the fundamentally incorrect assumption that 1) all autistic people could learn how to socialize normally if only they knew it was important and put in a bit of effort, and that 2) thus it is actually fine to judge the autistic people who don't
okay, you know what? Running away shouldn’t be a crime. It shouldn’t be dangerous, either. Any kid should be able to leave their parents if they want, for any reason. No I’m not kidding.
“But Rue, where will these kids stay? Do you want them on the streets?”
of course not. In an ideal world, a kids would have multiple adults other than their parents they could look to for care, but I recognize that that will never be a reality for every single child. So: youth shelters, if they have nowhere else to go. There should be clean, warm shelters where anyone under 18 can stay for as long as they need, no questions asked. (And of course shelters that aren’t just for kids, but we’re talking about youth rights right now)
“But Rue,” I hear you say, “what if some moody teenager runs away after an argument?”
First of all, I’d rather a thousand moody teenagers run away than one abused child be trapped. Second, so what if one does? A kid needs time away from their parents, so they leave. The vast majority of them will get some time to cool down and then go back home, and if they don’t want to go back, period? Then nine times out of ten, they have a good reason. (Because yes, as hard as it is for you to believe, kids are humans who have common sense.)
“Okay, but what about the one time out of ten the kid doesn’t have a good reason?”
Then the kid doesn’t have a good reason. It doesn’t change anything. If someone wants to break up with their partner because of something stupid, you wouldn’t say they legally shouldn’t be able to. (And if you would, then you’re just a bad person.) No one should have to be in a relationship, romantic or otherwise, that they don’t want to be in.
I feel like people are really conflating the idea "suicidal people deserve better social support that is non-carceral and non-institutional" with "if someone in your social circle is suicidal or commits suicide it is your fault for not being a good enough support for them" when that's not what the first idea means at all. Being non-carceral doesn't mean that we're replacing the cop/shrink with a friend who is bound by duty to take the gun out of their hand - they're your friend, not your subject, not your patient, not your social case. You can and should set boundaries and accept that their life is ultimately their choice.
Yes! It's okay if you personally cannot or do not want to take responsibility for helping a suicidal person for whatever reason. That's WHY we need communities, resources and options for suicidal people which are actually helpful, so that it doesn't always come down to the cops locking you up vs your partner breaking themselves in some attempt to keep you alive.
a danger of talking about diagnosis as though it legitimises xyz functional struggle is that it always carries the implication that people w/out a medical chart designation are not entitled to experience the same difficulties, or more specifically are not entitled to the accommodations for it. this has obviously shitty consequences for people who cannot afford encounters w/ the medical system, but also for those who simply don't fit or don't use specific professionally legitimated nosological taxonomies. this is why it's interpreted as a threat to recognise & accommodate disability w/out requiring a specific diagnostic term or process as a mediator. diagnosis can only grant access to certain resources for certain people by virtue of its antithetical power to gatekeep them from others; and ofc the access it does grant is always & therefore limited and precarious in nature
for my Mutuals…i love u 💗
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i understand that suicidal people need a place to go but as someone who had to talk various friends down from suicide attempts or got abused into staying with bad people due to them suicide baiting me from ages like 13-18, I feel bad for having trauma reactions around seeing people talk about feeling suicidal. they absolutely deserve a place to go about it but it just can't be me anymore. i can't be responsible for that anymore
Okay so. "Suicidal people should have safe places to discuss their experiences" doesn't actually imply "suicidal people don't have to respect other people's boundaries" or "you don't get to establish boundaries with suicidal people." You don't have to feel bad for not wanting to personally save suicidal people, nor do suicidal people have to feel bad for being suicidal. Both are allowed and none of you are bad (as long as no abusive behavior is being excused).
So can non-disabled people stop doing that thing where they act like it’s morally righteous to force yourself to work while you’re sick and assume taking sick days automatically equates to laziness. Any time now. That’d be great
The leader of the scout group I help out at approached me out of hours while I was walking to work to tell me that people have been talking behind my back because I missed more sessions than I attended this term (on account of having Covid twice) and was like “We all show up when we’re sick because we take responsibility” and I felt really shitty and guilty and cried the whole workday then I got home and told my mum and she was like “So they want you to throw up on the kids? That’s dodgy. They don’t even pay you. Stop going” and a wave of serenity hit me like a bus
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Level 1: Asylums are scary because there's crazy people there.
Level 2: We shouldn't treat mental health facilities as objects of horror because it stigmatises mental illness.
Level 3: Asylums are scary because there's psychiatrists there.
"it would be so good if it was good" will haunt you but "it's extremely good, except for the one or two parts which are so bad it's genuinely kind of insulting" will straight up drive you insane
one has you making posts like "okay but if the author UNDERSTOOD the POLITICAL IMPLICATIONS of the story they were telling, and leaned into it, it would actually be a really interesting exploration of..."
the other has you pacing your bedroom at one in the morning going "why. why would you ever in a million years do it like that. genuinely what possible thought process was involved. was the writer possessed by a fucking ghost or something."
