everyone can see that ive had too much to think

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

im sure if i move far away from home to somewhere no one knows me my whole personality will suddenly change and everyone will love me and everything will be better im sure im sure im sure

some of the best tropes: divorce, cheating, cucking, weird love triangle, breaking up making up, breaking up never making up, pining for your ex, pining for the person you're nominally in a competition with for the third end of the triangle, infidelity, emotional infidelity, fucking someone and imagining they're someone else, toxic soulmates, toxic codependency, proxy sex, exes with benefits, cheating, divorce

hello my name is Stray Hair snd my big dream is to play the itsy bitsy spider on broadway. doyou mind if i practice on the side of your head.

I like when construction workers spray paint their strange sigils on the pavement

maybe your cat is meowing bc it wants a cigarette

they should let me listen to music while looking out the window of a train for my entire life

Instead of going to work tomorrow why don’t we all just dig a really deep hole

if i don't lock in they'll kill me. if i don't lock in they are going to kill me. not in an honourable way. like a dog. afraid