are you five nights at fucking kidding me
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@tomb0y-ish
are you five nights at fucking kidding me

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Okay. I finally watched all 3 of the tobey mcguire Spider-Man movies
here is why they are good
Spider-Man saves people. These movies were refreshing because they reawakened the understanding of a superhero as someone who serves their community and does good in a way that an ordinary person could not do.
Spider-Man is part of a community. Spider-Man's relationships with others are absolutely central in each movie, whether that is with Aunt May, MJ, his acquaintances and friends, or random strangers he interacts with. The relationship of reciprocity between the people of New York and Spider-Man is an especially important theme in the second film, exemplified in the scene where the passengers on the train carry an unconscious and unmasked Spider-Man to safety and give him his mask back. Spider-Man is strong enough to stop the train from crashing, but he collapses in the aftermath, and his wounded body has to be supported by the hands of the many anonymous people whose lives he saved.
I just absolutely adore how "weakness" is treated in these films. There are many scenes where helpless people are threatened or held hostage and have to be saved by Spider-Man, but these people are almost always given some level of agency, and sometimes help Spider-Man in a crucial way. For example, Aunt May hitting Doctor Octopus with her cane, the New Yorkers on the bridge throwing objects at Green Goblin, and the people on the train protecting Spider-Man with their bodies when Doctor Octopus threatens him. In the second movie there is a scene where Peter Parker, having rejected his identity as Spider-Man, is trying to save a little girl (barely older than a toddler) from a burning building. When he nearly falls through a collapsing floor, the little girl, who has been carried in Peter's arms the whole time and was paralyzed with fear, reaches out to grab onto Peter's hands and tries to help pull him up, even though she doesn't have the strength to. This scene is so good, it makes me want to cry.
Spider-Man is actually dorky and awkward in a way that feels genuine.
Spider-Man messes up in ways that feel realistic and goes through genuine character growth. He actually has character flaws and has to work through them.
The way socioeconomic class affects the characters is shown.
There's something just very campy and dramatic and Shakespearean about the plots. MJ breaking up with her fiance on her wedding day and meeting Spider-Man in his apartment in her wedding dress. Harry preparing to kill Spider-Man with a dagger and then stumbling back in shock as he unmasks him. Eddie in the church looking like death warmed over begging God to kill Spider-Man. The love triangles, the hidden identities, Dr. Osborne hallucinating in a room full of creepy masks and then Harry having hallucinations of his dead father... everything is a little over-the-top in a way that is like we're not self conscious about the innate silliness of this story.
I love the way Harry pouts and broods and has such a bitchy Byronic hero look.
Y'all know I love a character who is a science experiment gone wrong and these movies delivered beautifully.
I appreciate the way it's sort of implied that Aunt May knows Peter is Spider-Man but there's not a big reveal, you could really interpret it either way.
in a lot of these my mind is just contrasting with tom holland spider-man because tom holland spider-man was a complete fumble of the character in comparison
Emos & scene kids got this close to abolishing gender for real. I try not to think about it too much.
The idea of a popular teenage subculture where girl & boys pretty much all dress the same feels impossible now but for a while it was reality and it was beautiful.

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superbat is a bad ship name. it should be manman
apparently my boss who is a professor at my school doesn’t have a cell phone and his coworkers were upset by this so they bought him a childs toy phone and labeled it “David’s jitterbug” (for those of you that don’t know jitterbugs are phones made for old people that have like massive buttons and shit) so the other day I walked into his office to ask him a question and he pressed a button on it which made it start loudly playing the ABCs and he said “excuse me I have to take this” and then started singing along to the ABCs while shooing me out of his office
this is the phone. he apparently was in the middle of a meeting with the department the other day and got annoyed so he pressed a button, said “I have to take this” and left
David’s co-workers probably: “This is a valid tactic to embarrass him into buying a mobile phone, right?”
David: “Bold of you to assume that I get embarrassed.”
how it feels to message a friend who's having Problems that you can't do anything to help with.
#i appreciate how genuine and non-judgemental this comic feels #like left one is not upset at right one for caring while being powerless #and right one seems genuinely distraught and not performative
I'm glad the facial expressions are coming across accurately! It can feel so absurd to say gosh I hope the torment maze removes some fire and rusty nails soon, but alas, sometimes that's all one can do.

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all roads lead to road dude. and when in road do as the rodents do.
Here in the great cosmic mistake we call western civilization, vast swaths of ppl are utterly convinced that terrible misfortune either only happened in the past or only happens in other places. This is an article of faith which supercedes the evidence of their own eyes and ears. I dunno what to do with these people. Trying to talk to them about current events that are currently eventing right in front of them is like trying to talk to a cartoon elf from a tv show for babies. They're like "[thing that was literally on the fucking news a day ago] could never, ever happen here in Happyland where bad things never happen, and talking about it makes me sad. Why do you want to make people sad? :( Nobody's sad in Happyland. :)"
A second Dollar General has hit the server
Further update: Greg is trapping goblins in the Dollar General
“What if poor people abuse the system?”
The system intrinsically abuses poor people.
Hope this helps.
"What if poor people abuse the system?"
Rich people abuse the system far more and out of pure greed, not necessity or desperation so idrc about that
message to all bitches
please survive

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Ok like. Imagine life without ads. You wake up, check your messages across a variety of apps, no ads. You get up and put on the tv while you prep your breakfast, no ads. Maybe you drive somewhere and switch on the radio, no ads. Maybe you drive a long distance, yet somehow, not a single billboard on your path. You pick up a newspaper or magazine to pass the time, no advertisements only articles. You turn on your game console, the home screen is just about your games, no ads to buy more. You open a streaming app, you don't pay extra for no ads, there's just no ads ever.
Think about how much of your time is spent looking at ads. "Download ublock" yeah I know, I have. But that doesn't change that the world is covered with endless advertising. Imagine never seeing that again. How much better our lives would be.
"Tattoos are becoming unpopular", "piercings are unpopular again", "keep your hair natural never dye it again, it's the trend now" literally fuck off I know what y'all are doing