Man, did you buy anything for yourself today? Yeah, I got this pack of socks. Plain white socks? That's not a treat! Donna! Get me away from him.
PARKS AND RECREATION | 4.04
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Noah Kahan


PR's Tumblrdome
cherry valley forever

shark vs the universe
almost home
noise dept.

Kiana Khansmith


romaā
Cosmic Funnies
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bliss lane

pixel skylines
The Stonewall Inn
Interview Vampire Daily
ā
KIROKAZE
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@tkdanosaur
Man, did you buy anything for yourself today? Yeah, I got this pack of socks. Plain white socks? That's not a treat! Donna! Get me away from him.
PARKS AND RECREATION | 4.04
Bonus:

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a girl at the club last night was trying to show me a diy video for an accessory she made and i lost it because this was the most recent video she had in her watch history
i like how the ^_^ emoticon doesn't even have an upturned mouth. goes to show a smile is all in the eyes
Screeching
same energy
You should be able to say ādonāt touch meā to anyone ever in any context and not have it be considered in the realm of surprising or insulting imho if we ever needed to normalize something itās this

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i miss everyone
Iāve been reading about werewolves on Wikipedia and I just have to say. āWerewolves are warriors that descend into hell to fight demonsā kicks unbelievable amounts of ass as a concept
this takes āall dogs go to heavenā to the next level
"We know it looks like a butt plug, just drink the water, it's hot outside"
Seriously though he's right, stay hydrated
"Fill up," he says.
some hyper famous artists like Van Gogh transcend overratedness and become underrated because they're so normalized. Like I'll look at a van Gogh and I'm like wait this really is amazing you guys don't get it
Shakespeare is like this
Every time I see a Van Gogh thatās not one of his better known pieces it absolutely blows me away
Have you seen this shit my liege? smh unreal

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Story Time:
Working in retail is really fun, and the times when major fuck-ups happen, they can be either anxiety-attack inducing, or make it possible to get through the rest of your god-awful shift with a smile depending on the customer. My all-time favorite absolute fuck-up is as follows:
This kind woman is just doing her thing. She scans her membership card from her keychain. The register beeps to acknowledge the scan. We continue as usual. Neither of us notice right away, but after Iāve scanned a few more items, I hear a very quiet, āUm,ā from the lady, very polite. I look at her. She is looking at the screen of my register, blinking. I, too, look.
And lo and behold. There is a charge of over four-thousand dollars ($4,000) worth of garlic bread staring us in the face. There are no words for a minute. Weāre just⦠in awe. How did this happen? How the hell did this happen?
She didnāt even have garlic bread in her cart.
I sputter a partial apology - I was incapable of forming actual sentences in the moment - and try to void the garlic bread. Since there was no garlic bread to scan, I try to manually remove $4,000-some from this transaction.
Well, the registers donāt like it when you try to void off more than five dollars ($5) from a transaction, so naturally it pings my manager for confirmation, but sheās not by her pager.
At this point, both myself and the lady are just⦠dumbfounded. Sheās not even mad. Iām not even all that embarrassed. Both of us are just looking at the screen. Thereās a bit of laughter, but itās mostly just⦠confusion.
I have to call through the whole store for my manager on the intercom because sheās not answering. She shows up, ready to override and void it, when she too, sees what exactly is being voided.
āWhat⦠did you do?ā
āI genuinely. Have literally. No. Idea.ā
She voids it, and I go to finish the transaction and tell the woman her total (minus the garlic bread). My register pings. It tells me that she hasnāt scanned her membership card. Odd. I distinctly remember her doing that. The woman goes to scan her card again, and I notice that her library card is stuck to her membership card. I tell her gently, and she separates the two and scans her card.
My manager, hovering nearby still, sees this and says, āI think it mistook the barcode of her other card for garlic bread, and the remaining digits were read as the price.ā
And thatās when the laughter really came over us. There were no hard feelings at all. In fact, the woman was incredibly glad that the receipt still showed the garlic bread and the voiding of. I will remember it until the end of time, my only regret in the entire situation being that I didnāt take a damn picture, because she has proof and I donāt. But I swear to God it happened.
TDLR; Library Card Charged $4,000 of Garlic Bread.
thatās just how valuable library cards are. each one is worth at least $4000 of garlic bread
A picture is worth a thousand words, a library card is worth $4000 worth of garlic bread, if we can figure out how many words the average library card can check out at once, we can probably work out a picture-to-garlic bread conversion here, too.
I love the implication that, as Larry is an "unpaid trainee", the dog is paid.
Some great additions from the comments.

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I love this scene so much, because it means 4Kids thought that young children would
Know what an insurance policy is
Be able to extrapolate that Giovanni is planning to commit insurance fraud
Understand that insurance fraud is a crime
ā¦but they didnāt think those same kids would be able to comprehend rice balls
oh to be a slightly ridiculous looking sea monster on a geographically inaccurate medieval map