Poof

48 years ago a girl said “oh fuck me” to her best friend while walking in the street, a guy who randomly passed by answered by “let me at least buy you dinner first”. I present to you my grandparents, in love since then and celebrating their 47 years of marriage today.

grandpa got game

I never wondered what they looked like before. Wow. I literally just gasped. How neat!

Which is another reason you shouldn’t pick them up by their top shell

Everyone knows that you shouldn’t pick up a tortoise or turtle by their shell since their backbone is fused with it, but often it’s not really an easy thing to visualize how that works. Here’s a really cool image for that… 

Almost NOBODY knows this, because people don’t bother to simply show you a fucking image like this in school so before i saw this on tumblr i thought a turtle was simply a loose animal in a shell like a snail

did Harry Potter really have a currency called a knut??? how did preteen (and let’s be real twenty year old) wizards deal w that??

This is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen I’ve been laughing for 5 minutes please send help

why would a candle thats already lit want to be with a match

also her being lit is going to eventually melt her and reduce her to nothing match guy is an abusive sadboy who thinks he’s the victim when candlegirl just wants someone who will keep her alive

im here for this analysis

if you wake up while McDonald’s is still serving breakfast then you’re doing good

doesnt mcdonalds have all day breakfast now?

if you wake up at all then you’re doing good

That point in a piece of fanfiction where you can tell something embarrassing is about to happen so you start fucking around on tumblr because you’re a huge baby with a crippling overabudance of empathy.

I do this with every media I consume. I pause movies and have to walk around and prepare myself for second-hand embarrassment sometimes.

This is mE

I TOTALLY DO THIS.

she put her glasses on so she could read Kim properly

im kourtney

I’m Kourt but I’m also Kris and also Rob

“I’m married for 72 days, really? that was normal” like how did Kris just murder her own daughter like that