asleep or dead

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

when i was younger i had a really bad fear of danny devito when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i was asleep and he told me it would confuse danny devito and he would think it was daytime and get scared of the sun and leave me alon

Your brother is the best

Who the fuck changed this from vampires to Danny devito

the real question is why I was completely ready to accept that this person had a debilitating childhood fear of Danny Devito

World Heritage Post

the part of adulthood that no one ever warns you about is the amount of surfaces you need to acquire to put your things and trinkets on

we can’t talk here contact me in my dream tonight

they're called human rights because you get them by being human. No ifs no buts. Everyone gets them. Yes even those people

whatever needs to be said was said in iris by the goo goo dolls

brought nothing to the gun fight. whatever man