I'd rather waltz

Dont ask me whats up i have done nothing since we last talked 3 years ago

"My head hurts so BAD when will it STOP" i cry out as i scroll harder down the headhurter9000 rectangle in my hands

who up wasting their only shot at life through complete and utter inaction

i just wanna do nothinggggg 😭😭😭😭😭 which is like what im already doing but i wanna do it in a way that doesnt actively ruin my life 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I MISS THE HEADPHONE JACK FUCK YOU!!!!!!

the problem is i really do love staying up until one billion o'clock. it just cant be helped

one thing about me is i’m gonna go lay down

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

remember in p.e. when they'd take a bunch of insecure teenagers & be like "today we're going to play basketball" and then not teach you how to play basketball. and then put you in a group with guys who were obsessed with basketball and would get mad at you for not knowing how to play basketball. why did they do that

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

crossfaded somewhere between "there has to be more to life than this" and "every mundane thing is beautiful when you're with people you love"

sorry i can’t go out tonight i’m at home sitting down

it should be illegal for people to be in the kitchen at the same time as me