a harry potter au where potions is taught by gordon ramsay
neville: *messes up his potion*
gordon ramsay: *holds neville between two slices of bread* what are you
neville: an idiot sandwich
no no no!
Imagine that this is Gordon Ramsay a la Masterchef Junior
Neville: *messes up the potion, realizes it, starts crying quietly*
GR: Whatâs going on?
Neville: *explains how he messed up*
GR: Oh gosh okayâŚwe can fix this, donât cry, see, itâs fine now? Just be more careful when youâre adding the Newtâs eyes, all right? Drop them in gently. There we go. No more tears.
Neville: *giggles wetly, wiping eyes*
Yes, he only screams when heâs dealing with people that claim to know what theyâre doing and clearly dont, when heâs teaching heâs very kind and patient because theyâre still learning.
Heâd probably do the bread thing to Malfoy.
nononononono. I get that Malfoy is a bit of a twat, but heâs still a kid. Itâd be the teachers fucking up that heâd have trouble with.
Ramsay: All you had to do was treat it with a fucking Beozar!Â
Slughorn: It was a stressfu-
Ramsay:Â How long have you been teaching potions?!
or
Ramsay: So youâre going to raise this boy SPECIFICALLY so he can die as part of your twisted little scheme?Â
Dumbledore: Itâs for the greater good, professor.Â
Ramsay: The greater fucking good?! *holds two slices of bread either side of dumbledoorâs face* What are you?Â
Dumbledore: Am I, per chance, an idiot sandwich?Â
Ramsay: Yes, you fucking are.Â
Okay, now I can reblog it!
@marauders4evr
Fantastic!
@alrightanakin
Iâm in love
I MUST HAVE REBLOGGED A THOUSAND TIMESSSS
My favorite Gordon Ramsey moment is from the latest season of Master Chef Jr.
Gordon had run in to help a group of struggling kids with a team challenge and one of the older kids, a 12 year old boy, wasnât passing attention while taking a pan out of the oven and not only spilled all the food but scalded Gordon.
Itâs clear Gordonâs leg is in pain. Heâs been badly burned without warning. But he doesnât scream. He doesnât yell, not even in pain, and he doesnât go off on the child who is now frozen in fear. He calmly tells the child to set the pan down and to close the oven, safety first. Then tells him to go restart the food he was making, calm instructions.
My husband and I grew up in abusive homes where any mistake meant parents getting angry (my husband is terrified of spills or broken glasses because that meant beatings growing up, for me, anything going wrong, that could upset my mother, even if it wasnât my fault meant screaming and emotional abuse).
I didnât know someone could be so calm. That someone could not get angry, and put aside what theyâre feeling (in this case a lot of physical pain) and not take it out on those around them, even when someone around them had messed up, because that person is a child.
Gordon Ramsey is a survivor of child abuse himself and as an adult, the most non-abusive person ever when it comes to kids.
im going to cry can gordon ramsey be my parent this sound so beautiful
Please take a moment to picture Gordon Ramsay taking over Potions when Snape becomes the DADA professor (instead of Slughorn) and not only being horrified when he realizes how terrified the students are that heâll verbally abuse them when they mess up in Potions class but when he overhears how Snape treats students. Like can you IMAGINE the level of RAGE and CONTEMPT that Ramsay would harbor towards Snape? The asshat wouldnât have made it to the end of HBP. Ramsay wouldâve hexed his ass to kingdom come.
Rebloging ALL of this because Chef Ramsay is THE MAN!
-HC
Chef Ramsay would have become the kidsâ favourite teacher and you canât take that away from me.
Imagine him dealing with Umbridge
GR: WANDS AWAY??! How are they meant to pass exams without actually performing the charm theyâre meant to do??Â
Umbitch: a theoretical knowledge will be sufficient to get them through their examinationsâŚ
GR: you fUCKING DONKEY!
Gordan Ramsay is a god and no one can tell me otherwise
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Where the fuck has this been all my life?
