Just another writer

The aching sadness in my chest never fucking go away.

People will empathize characters they see on screen, in movies and tv show. But they forget to empathize people who are in front of them, real humans who display real emotions and deteriorating mental health signs. Amazing, isn't it?

Why is my sadness not important? Why I get constantly overlooked, as if I am a ghost that people see right through. Why does only my voice gets drowned in the sea of others. What even is the point in being alive if I get always ignored, brushed aside.

When I say that nobody loves me or cares for me, I am not saying it for seeking attention. I am merely stating the truth. No matter who, everyone has ever only used me for their own gains, family and friends both. They have wanted me around because I am a good listener, because I give the best advice, because I can never say no to any thing no matter what cost I have to pay, personally or else. They have disappear as soon as their purpose was fulfilled.

My heart feels homesick for yours.

I won't find peace in this life.

The truth is, I miss him. More than I should. More than he deserves. I read somewhere that sometimes you meet someone for the first time and recognise them immediately like you knew them from before, you love them even when you don't know them. The reason is these people have met before as souls and have known each other. That's why you love someone for no reason and hate someone for no reason. I guess this was that. I loved him when I didn't knew who he was. I did not know anything , just that my heart knew his from centuries and he feels like home. I'm afraid I won't feel that feeling again with someone. I'm afraid I won't find home.

Its so heartbreaking to know that I can go a whole day without talking to anyone or meeting anyone and having zero human contact and still I won't be missed. Nobody would think twice why I haven't been online since 24hrs or why I am not picking up anyone's calls.