Procrastination Station

tank top that says “i ❤️ armpit hair”

imagine if misogyny and homophobia didn’t make mens fashion so boring. imagine if

boy, I dunno what I expected after the first paragraph, but it wasn't what I got

I’m running a DnD campaign with my siblings and mom, who are all big MythBusters fans, so obviously I made Jamie Hyneman and Adam Savage NPCs. Adam is a human and Jamie (JAM13) is a robot. Adam claims to have built JAM13, and is not satisfied with his inability to emote properly, but is very satisfied with his walrus-like facial hair. JAM13, however, claims to have grown Adam from a test tube and named him after the biblical figure, and says he is “clearly a very primitive approximation of a human being.” Insight checks on who is lying are useless because both of them fully believe they’re telling the truth.

You’re doing the Gods’ work my dude

what’s the truth op

"that kiss was awkward" "it has a bad angle" "they look so off" my brothers in christ they are two emotionally repressed middle aged men who had never known what romantic love is, did you think they would immediately be experts at making out 😭😭😭😭 this is actually perfect 😭🙏🏼🏴‍☠️

david jenkins looking at the skeleton stabbing the heart on blackbeard's flag and going "that happened because blackbeard had a really bad breakup with his boyfriend" is the best thing to happen to screenwriting in decades

Taika Waititi MUST complete the trifecta and give us a show about gay cowboys alongside the gay vampires and gay pirates

never in a million years would I have thought a PIRATE COMEDY SHOW SET IN THE 18TH CENTURY would have a scene where a gay man sits down with his wife and has a conversation without her about what it means to be in love and then he comes to out to her and tells her he's in love with a man and then she hugs him and helps him fake his fucking death so he can leave his old life behind and wholeheartedly pursue a new life with the man he loves without guilt or shame and yet our flag means death gave us that. I didn't think I'd ever get to know what the opposite of queerbaiting looks like but I saw it today

my cat hates taking his pills. the only way we can get him to eat them is to turn it into an elaborate pantomime - we take the packet out of the cupboard slowly and hold it up, saying “oh!! what’s this? what’s this? a TREAT? a TREAT for louis????” while making surprised faces. we offer him a pill… then, before he has a chance to sniff it, we wag our fingers at him and replace it in the packet so it becomes a Tantalising Forbidden Mystery. we continue doing this until he’s so confused and excited that he will eat the pill as fast as possible, just so he can find out what it is before we can take it away from him again. as soon as he’s eaten it he looks utterly disappointed and betrayed, like a child who just ate a delicious sweet only to find it was a chocolate-coated brussels sprout. it never gets old

Op this is the funniest thing I’ve ever read