MJ

Sunny Day Jack

Just Trust In Me, Sunshine.

Let Me Take Care of You!

He'll Never Bother You Again.

I am also going to try posting these works on AO3, too. Just filter the Sunny Day Jack Visual Novel tag to latest works and it should be there!

The Freak Circus

Judgment Has Come (Pierrot x Reader Angst Oneshot)

A Very Normal Reaction (Pierrot x Fem! Reader Oneshot)

"Yes, I will never leave you, just as you will never leave me. We will be together, from now until the end of time."

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Two Days Later

Recovery, from anything really, is a strange thing. It's a common idea, perhaps obtained from the books and movies we consume, that recovery is a consistent, stable process -- like a linear graph that only moves upward over time. However, once someone is truly in the throes of recovery, it is terribly, terribly different.

Sure, you had been sick or injured before, but nothing to this extent of course. Few people ever have been. You have officially joined the small "Beaten within an Inch of Your Life and Survived" club, and it's not a fun place to be.

Unfortunately, you were smart, and always saw the bigger picture, so you knew the path would be torture. Your body would even feel worse, like you were in the pits of hell, before feeling better and then back down again. It was the body's way of healing after such a great trauma -- going up and down and back and forth until the nervous system could regulate itself from the shock, the aggressive healing process stopped, and eventually... everything leveled out.

And yet, there was nothing you could do except mentally prepare.

Thankfully, you felt like you were in good hands. From the moment that you woke up in Doctor's tent, Pierrot has been with you over 75% of the time, only leaving for periodic breaks mostly during the night. In fact, you haven't even left the bed. Because you were so weak, you had to use a bedpan, to which you cried your eyes out at the complete loss of dignity while Pierrot stroked your head and sniffled quietly at your distress.

However, Doctor did quickly prove to be a true expert in his field -- professional, quick, and never even flinching while changing and cleaning you up. After all, this was nothing to him, and, as he so simply put it, "just the body's normal functions." You were able to convince Pierrot to turn around while he did this, but still failed in getting him to leave the tent.

You couldn't even take a regular shower. Doctor strictly forbade it and would use his strength to gently lift you and clean with body wipes while Pierrot gently raked waterless shampoo into your hair.

Yes, recovery isn't pretty. In fact, it is awkward, gross, and sometimes utterly repulsive, but this was the truth, and you could not run from it.

You also couldn't eat regular food, either. Doctor meant it when he said a "liquid diet" for a couple of weeks while your jaw recovered, and while the mixtures you ate had all the nutrients you needed, and Pierrot made delicious shakes, it was never enough. 

You were so, so hungry.

And you were existing, but barely. 

These two days have felt like the longest and most painful of your entire life, and there were times... not a lot, just small, fleeting moments... that you wished the men that beat you had succeeded in their end goal. After all, if this was only the first two days of many more, you weren't sure how much you could take.

You would never tell Pierrot that, of course. If you did, you knew he would lose his mind.

Speaking of Pierrot, you wondered how he was even able to stay with you 24/7 if he had his performances scheduled, to which he replied like it was the most obvious thing in the world, "My dear, why would you worry about such a thing? The only thing you should worry about is getting better. My shows have been canceled for the rest of the week so that I can take care of you, meu amor.” 

That was only partially true. What you didn’t know was, while you rested in the silence of Doctor’s tent that Pierrot so carefully protected for your concussion and damaged ears, you were left peacefully unaware of the chaos that happened outside as the circus prepared an exhaustive emergency departure following Pierrot’s brutal rampage of those four men.

All shows were abruptly cancelled, all attractions shut down, and anybody who tried to enter the circus was immediately escorted out by Ticket Taker, whether it was peaceful or not.

While it was less than a full 48 hours, one of those four men was already reported missing, and it would only be a matter of time before the others were reported as well.

They had to flee before the police connected the dots. 

Before the public became suspicious. 

Before all that they worked for, everything they sacrificed, was exposed and came crashing down.

This urgency had everybody stressed. Jester and Ticket Taker, whom you knew of but had never met properly, had not once entered into your tent to check on your status. What you also didn’t know was, while you were unconscious, they accompanied Pierrot to properly “clean” and “dispose of” his mess.

While they certainly weren’t happy that you were lying in Doctor’s tent, they knew better than to ever disagree with Pierrot when he was in this state. He was the strongest out of all of them; the most impulsive as well. When he said he wanted his show to be canceled the day he brought you in, eyes wide with frenzy and a primal possessiveness that stopped at nothing, they agreed without hesitation. 

And when he said you were now his, and he would take you with him anywhere, there was no convincing him otherwise. 

If it kept him sane, kept him placated, there was no choice but to obey his demands. 

It was the smartest thing to do in such a tumultuous situation.

While he never tried to show it, the poor red clown was stressed beyond belief. Once everything else was packed and ready to go, Doctor’s tent would be the last to come down, and ultimately, getting you ready for departure. 

How would he tell you? How would you react? How will they transport you in your precarious condition? 

He knew that leaving was the last thing you wanted to do. While you had no family of your own, and therefore avoided being labeled missing, you were stable in your job and life and were definitely not looking to uproot it any time soon. 

You even texted your boss within the first day that you were “in an accident” and were at the hospital recovering, and should hopefully be back within a couple of weeks. Thankfully, he had already hired a new employee, so he wasn’t left to scramble too much. 

But to you, once all this was over, you were certain you would go back. 

…………….…….

……………………………

If only you knew this would be the last time you ever lived in this town again. 

You would never return. 

Pierrot knew what he had to do.

And he knew that your fondness of him was only growing, and you were even growing closer to loving him.

Even through all your pain, all the torture of recovery, you let him stay, let him care for you, and hung on to his every word.

He knew that what he would do next would break your trust in him, perhaps to an irreparable degree. 

He only hoped you could find it within yourself to forgive him. 

…………………………………………….

It was evening on the second day, and you were staring up at the canopy of Doctor’s tent motionless as he reapplied bandages across your body and ice to your knee, ribs, ears, and jaw.

You were practically inside an ice block, or at least it felt that way.

You had splints on your knee and jaw to immobilize it, thankfully nothing too invasive, and you had just completed your breathing and coughing exercises on the spirometer to measure lung capacity too. According to Doctor, it was crucial you did not develop pneumonia from your fractured ribs, and thankfully, you have been doing well enough to avoid any immediate concerns.

However, you couldn’t cough too hard because of your eardrums… ugh. It was so many injuries piled on top of one another, all so difficult to manage. 

You wondered how Doctor even managed everything without seeming bothered. If you were him, you would’ve just left your ass in a ditch somewhere and hoped for the best. 

You chuckled at the thought, which grabbed Doctor’s attention. 

“Is something funny, sweetie?”

You looked back down at him and gave him a tired smile. “No… not really. I was just thinking how you even manage to do all this without feeling overwhelmed. Or maybe you are, and you just don’t show it.”

Doctor hummed and tilted his head. “I don’t know why I would be. I am a doctor, and this is what I do.”

You fell silent and left it at that. 

Suddenly, the flap to the tent swung open, and Pierrot practically flew inside as he made a beeline towards you like he hadn’t seen you in years.

He was only gone for 20 minutes.

“My dear! How are you feeling? Is everything alright? Is doctor taking good care of you?”

You opened your mouth to reply before Doctor answered.

”Yes, the patient is fine, I was just finishing changing bandages and reapplying ice.” Doctor stared at Pierrot.

A very polite way of saying Get out of my way until I am done. 

Pierrot thankfully understood the hint and moved away slightly to let Doctor continue. “My dear, I brought you another milkshake to eat. Would you like me to hold it for you while you drink?”

Ugh, this was so embarrassing, but he is so sweet, even though your arms do work. 

“Sure.”

He seemed to blush at that and sat at your bedside while holding up the shake to your mouth and letting you sip on the straw.

”My dear, it pains me so that I cannot give you more than this. I see the way your eyes falter, how hungry you must be, that this isn’t enough, even with Doctor’s mixtures. Meu amor! I would do anything to take your suffering away. I would take all your pain and suffer for a thousand years if it meant you could have peace for even a second. I would do anything, I WILL do anything for you! Just say the word, I am yours to command. Even when you lay here in such agony, left to our care, you still look at me with those eyes, eyes full of love and forgiveness for me even when I could not save you in time.”

That final thought seemed to finish him as he shook and dropped from the chair to his knees in front of you, much to your dismay.

”I do not deserve you or your kindness, and yet you give it. I deserve nothing, yet you are my salvation. How beautiful you are, my dear, even laying here now— you are perfection incarnate! Even through this pain, you endure so beautifully. But I—“

He gently, but firmly grasped your hand as he stared at you with desperation and many other things you couldn’t name. 

“I will never let this happen again.”

He was starting to spiral, you could tell, so you put your hand on his to end his monologue. He often went on these dramatic, theatrical rants ever since he brought you here, with words full of love and gospel, and while you adored him deeply, it was often too much to process. 

Fortunately, he didn’t expect you to reciprocate.

”… Thanks, Pierrot.” You had to speak quietly and not move your mouth too much. “I….am so thankful for you. You did save me, though. If it weren’t for you, I would have died. I am indebted… and I couldn’t do this without you.”

Your words practically broke him. At the mention of your death his face was overcome with agony, and later whiplashed into obsession at your mention of gratitude.

He has a lot of big feelings for a big guy.

Surprisingly, he didn’t respond, just watched you like a hawk as you sipped. Doctor, who was there the whole time and just finished tending to you, seemed to filter out Pierrot’s crazed love rants and moved back without a word. He seemed to send a sharp glance to the red clown, to which Pierrot looked up and his face filled with understanding.

What was that about? 

It was probably nothing too important. 

“My dear, Doctor is going to inject more painkillers into your IV, and then it will be time to go to bed. Don’t worry, I will be here the whole time, and I will protect you.”

You were confused but nodded. Didn’t Doctor just give you more morphine a little while ago? At this point, it would replace your bloodstream entirely. 

But you are not the expert, so who are you to question? 

Doctor moved away to grab it while you looked at Pierrot. 

“I hope they catch those men who did this to me.”

Your face was filled with heartbreak. Oh my dear, you had no idea. 

Pierrot’s face hardened in a moment so fleeting it was imperceptible to you before looking at you with his usual dopey smile. 

“I’m sure they will, my love. I’m sure they will.”

Doctor came back and quietly as he injected the painkillers into your IV as you stared into Pierrot’s eyes. 

He meant so much to you. 

He—

You blinked before trying to finish that thought. What were you… 

It was like all semblance of coherent thought immediately left as you were immediately hit with an unscalable wall of drowsiness. You tried hard to focus on Pierrot’s face, only for him and your surroundings to blur into shades of red, black, and white as your eyes began to droop. 

You couldn’t think. You couldn’t speak.You couldn’t move. Why….?

You knew what being tired was like. Even on your first day, as Doctor gave you pain meds, you fell asleep right away, exhausted beyond belief. 

But this… this was different. It was unnatural.  You could sense it deep within your bones, your instincts screaming. 

What was happening?

As you faded into the world of oblivion, you heard one last thing, a simple sentence before you were pulled under completely. 

Two words. 

In a language you couldn’t understand. 

“Me desculpa.”

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Translations!!:

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UGH.

That seemed to be the only word fitting for your situation right now. Well, the proper word wouldn't even be a coherent word, more like an EEUEUEUAAHGGHH, as that seemed to convey the agony a little bit better.

Your period started this morning, and it came full force and without mercy. So naturally, you were huddled up in your bed, heating pad turned to the max setting, and yet, your bed  -- hell, your whole ROOM -- felt way too hot and stuffy, but you can't exist without the heating pad. It's like accepting one form of torture for the sake of easing another that's much worse, but of course, the heating pad can only do so much.

You had already taken the maximum amount of painkillers recommended, and are waiting for the hours to finish up until you can take more, so there's only one thing left to do--

Sit there and bear it.

Thankfully, it was your day off, and even if it wasn't, you knew your boss would be more than accommodating, even if he doesn't understand completely what's going on. No man really truly does, but the more sympathetic they can be, the better.

Speaking of men...

Pierrot.

You knew he had a show tonight, and the night before when he came to visit you, you told him you'd be happy to attend his show for the umpteenth time, as you basically had a free pass and you and Pierrot had grown extremely close ever since his time here. You knew he looked forward to seeing you there, and you'd be sure to shower his pure art and athleticism with endless praise, which always made him red as a cherry and clingy in that way you absolutely adored.

He was a big, strong man, literally swinging effortlessly from swing to swing in his acrobatic stunts and throwing kunai knives with unimaginable force, but yet...

He looked at you with a gentleness and vulnerability that made your heart squeeze, carried with a heavy undercurrent of adoration (and obsession) that you have never seen in a gaze before. 

You would be lying if you said it didn't do anything to you.

Of course, lacking the oversight to remember your period and just how much it affected you, and saying yes to attending his show without hesitation, you felt immensely guilty that you couldn't go (there was just no way), and it was made even worse by the fact that you had no way to tell him.

You didn't have his phone number or any contact information, but yet, a part of you almost wondered if he even had a phone at all. Perhaps he did but wasn't allowed to carry it while working? But what about emergencies?

However, he did give off major home-schooled vibes, so you really are unsure if he does.

You groaned and rolled around on your abdomen to put direct pressure on your abdomen and hopefully force the heating pad to penetrate deeper. At this point, you didn't even care if you got toasted skin syndrome -- it was a small price to pay for any kind of relief.

Why did we women have to get cursed like this? What was the point? Why does the body do this every month? Seems like a very insufficient and flawed design system. Fuck you, evolutionary process.

Suddenly, you heard a tap-tap-tap against your window. 

Ah.

It was still a couple hours until his show, so you should have anticipated he might come. In your state, you just couldn't think about it, let alone think at all.

You didn't even get up, just lifted and extended your arm back and waved for him to come in while your face was squished in the pillow. You kept it unlocked now pretty much all the time. That was probably a bad thing, getting used to this, but Pierrot was just so sweet and adorable and damnit, if he wanted to come in through the balcony, he can come in through the balcony!

He came in right away and slid the door shut, zipping across the room right away and immediately kneeling at the foot of your bed while taking your extended hand in his, and you turned to look at him.

What you saw made you unsure of whether to laugh or cry.

He looked so concerned it was actually unreal. His whole frame trembled and shook, and his eyes were big and watery as he frantically stroked your hand while breathing erratically.

Did he think you were on your deathbed?

What you didn't know, you poor dear, was that to Pierrot, you practically were. You had just no idea how "homeschooled" this man really was, and all he knew is that when he came in, he immediately caught on to the scent of blood that permeated the air and grew stronger as he drew closer to you. That, coupled with your obvious distress, made him almost undone with anxiety.

He suspected that something was up, but he wasn't sure. After all, the night before, you did smell different, but not of blood or anything, just... different. He couldn't put his finger on it. You also seemed more tired as well, with more specific food cravings as well as a little grumpy, so he just assumed you had a tough day at work (of course, not without asking if anybody specifically caused you trouble, to which you laughed it off).

However, this smell was unmistakably blood, but it was...different. Deeper. The scent profile was muskier. He did faintly recognize it, maybe when closer to some of the fools at the circus, but truth be told, the entire circus reeked of blood at every corner and there was no concern nor reason to investigate it.

But for you, he was very concerned.

"My lady?! Are you alright, meu amor?! What's happening?! Do I need to take you to doctor?! Are you in a lot of pain?!  What ails you?!" his voice was cracking with fear, almost unconsolable at the fact that you were experiencing pain and he had no idea how to help you. While panicked, he didn't want to give away too much with his words, letting you know he could actually smell the blood itself, making you suspicious of him and -- God forbid-- see him for what he was. He would never let that happen.

You stared at him, unblinking.

For a good, long time.

Oh my God.

Is this guy serious?

Your blank stare actually made him shake even harder.

Oh no, something is truly wrong with my lady!

You blinked, and then...you laughed.

Actually laughed at him.

You laughed so hard, you got tears in your eyes as well, and Pierrot looked completely dumbfounded as you laughed at this poor man's cluelessness. But how could you help yourself?

"Pierrot, it's alright? I am okay! Everything is fine! I don't need any help. I am just on my period" you chuckled while letting out an exaggerated sigh "Uuuuughhh... always the hardest time of the month, am I right? But Pierrot, do you... do you seriously not know what a period is?"

His void-like eyes boring into your soul only confirmed your suspicion.

"Uh okay, uh... wow. Really? I mean sorry, I don't mean to be rude or anything, but uh... did you ever learn? Nobody ever told you? I mean, you never met a girl who does? Uhh..."

You were truly befuddled.

This man was more sheltered than you thought. What, was the circus part of some sort of religious fundamentalism? 

Was Pierrot raised by monks?

Truth be told, before Pierrot met you, he had NO interest in anything to do with humans or their fragile ailments. Doctor did try to sit him down for lessons to teach him about human anatomy and biology, but every time Pierrot told him he was not interested and Doctor eventually gave up altogether. Pierrot was never really the type to try and push or convince. Even Jester mentioned to Doctor that he had no need to know, after all, it was better to keep him safe from humans and their inferior processes.

"My lady, are you sure? I must admit, I have never heard of a "period," but you say it is normal? Then why do you look so in pain?" His voice wobbled. He moved from his kneeling position near your bed to sit and stroke your hair out of your face.

"Yeah, sorry, haha, I know that must look bad," you moved to sit up, and you winced a little. You could have sworn you heard a small, deep whine from the back of Pierrot's throat at your action, but perhaps you were overthinking it. "But it's normal, well, at least for me and a lot of women."

Good thing was Pierrot seemed to have calmed down significantly, but he was still on edge. He wrapped his arm around you as he climbed into the bed fully and you leaned into his side, much to his happiness.

"Why are you apologizing for, my lady? You should never apologize for anything," Pierrot looked at you with a deep, irreversible obsession. "Please, do tell me everything."

Ugh, he was so good and such an eager listener. 

"Well, I guess I should start from the beginning, ha. Basically -- Oh God I'm gonna explain this so bad--" you rubbed your hands over your face. "It's so complex, and there are many variables, but basically, when a woman is just letting nature do its thing, not on any birth control or meds or anything, or doesn't have any hormonal imbalances or disorders, the body prepares each month for pregnancy after it releases an egg, which causes a thick, bloody tissue called "endometrial lining" in the uterus, er-- womb so that the environment is conducive to having a baby. Think of it like 'Hey! We prepared and did all this work and we want you to get pregnant!' But here's the kicker, if nothing happens, if the egg isn't fertilized and doesn't turn into a baby and go into the womb, then the body's like 'Well, what the fuck? We did all this work for nothing, gotta get rid of it now,' and then the tissue and blood come out through the closest exit, which is..."

You gestured down, shy.

"Well, there."

It looked like major gears were turning in Pierrot's head, and you fully expected to see smoke from just how hard he was thinking about it. Slowly, things started to click into place, and Pierrot looked at you with such surprise that it looked like he found the meaning of life.

"My lady... and this happens every month?"

You nodded.

"Yes. The pain comes from cramps from the uterus contracting to expel the tissue, and for women, the pain varies all across. Some women don't experience any, lots do, and for some it's completely debilitating."

He looked at you with both fear and determination, like he wanted to fight off the pain himself.

"My lady, is there anything I can do? I swear to you, I will do everything in my power to make this pain go away, or at least diminish as much as possible. Whatever you need, my lady, I am here, at your service, at your feet. I am willing to move the stars in the sky, should you ask for it. Anything, meu amor! I will do anything. What do you need?"

Your heart felt like it was about to burst.

He doesn't understand it fully still but yet, he wants to help so badly. He wants to understand.

How many men can you say even want to do that, or even try?

"Thank you, Pierrot. You are truly a gem, you know that? Right now, I have a heating pad on to help with the cramps, but I would love for you to cuddle me close and maybe just gently rub my stomach, if that's alright with you."

You didn't even need to ask him twice. He immediately scooped you in his arms and laid down with you as a big spoon, wrapping his arms around you and beginning to gently run them over your stomach.

"Oh, my lady, you need not worry or ever ask again, to touch you like this... what bliss! To feel the warmth of your skin, your presence, and your kind words... you are the one blessing me! Please, let me do this for you forever. It is a joy to be close to you like this, to be the one who eases your pain! To think you go through this every month, and yet you endure so bravely, so beautifully, my lady, you are divinity!"

He shuddered from behind you.

Wow. Oh boy.

"Oh, haha...thanks Pierrot. It's so great having you here too and being with you. You are the best." Is that enough? You didn't know if you could process all his intensity right now... In the past, you wondered if it was even performative just from how unbelievable it sounds, but now you know Pierrot, and the truth is unmistakable.

His words are, without a doubt, 100% sincere.

"Please, do not thank me, my lady. It is I who should be thanking you. Now rest, and I will protect you and hold you in my arms until the morning, and then you can tell me more about this "period" -- I wish to learn everything for you, meu amor. But for now, please--"

He gently kissed the top of your head.

"Sleep."

You almost felt like crying from how sweet it is. You couldn't see his face, but you wondered what it looked like then. You nodded, hoping he could see it, and nestled further into his muscular embrace as he enveloped you from all sides like a grounding, nurturing force. Your eyelids grew heavy, your movements slow, and you breathed in relaxation as Pierrot watched you with hearts in his eyes.

And soon, with you safely nestled in his embrace, you both drifted off into a comfortable, peaceful sleep.

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Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it! I actually proofread this time!

Judgment Has Come (Pierrot x Reader Oneshot

(Please assume for this story that the reader never encountered Carol as a fool, was never kidnapped by Pierrot, and knows nothing about the circus. Just an innocent, naive soul lol)

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.

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For a little while now, you have felt as if you've been on the precipice of an all-consuming tension, waiting for the minute you stumble and fall as it pushes you down in its impenetrable wave. You are not unaware of the rising vitriol your beloved Freak Circus encounters every day that it stays in your town -- and it's already been three months.

Three months, and people are starting to get more aggravated than ever.

More people have gone missing. Not a lot -- just one or two, but enough for the already open wound of distrust amongst the townspeople to fester into something much more sinister. Something only driven by hate -- blaming it on the circus and its "satanic rituals."

You have seen this and many more on the internet as people post about the Freak Circus on your city's main page on Facebook. Truly terrible conspiracy theories, ideas, and calls to "fight back" against the evil -- to drive them once and for all.

You have been scared. Truly scared. And yet, strangely enough, nobody has attacked Pierrot physically since the day you stood up for him. But people watch, cruelty and aggression in their body language as he and the other performers continue to hand out flyers. Some people shout things, truly terrible obscenities, but that's only happened when you are not around and you found out from Pierrot after the fact (he was reluctant to tell you, as he knew you'd be devastated).

Despite all this, the growing primal fear you cannot shake has not stopped you from continuing to form a bond with Pierrot. Every night, he visits you at your house, and you spend quality time together. He loves to cook for you, bringing you all sorts of confectioneries. He professes his undying adoration to you, wishing to serve you in every aspect possible because, to him, that is now the goal of his existence. You both watch movies together, talk about all sorts of nonsense things long into the night, and end up cuddling in each other's arms as Pierrot stares at you with golden sparkling eyes.

You always seem to fall asleep first, much to your annoyance. And, by the morning, he is gone.

Truly, you couldn't anticipate just how much he would grow on you, and the fondness that creeps over your heart every time you see him has started to feel less platonic and more... more?

You're not sure what it is, but you can tell your feelings for Pierrot are developing, hinting at the possibility of more. You want him to stay longer, cuddle him tighter, open more of yourself to him without the fear of being perceived as strange or off-putting.

And oh, Pierrot can tell too. The tremors of excitement whenever he sees you, how he cuddles you closer without fear of rejection, bringing you more things, slowly inserting himself into your life piece by piece -- he knows. And this man is in heaven knowing that his pursuit is working.

Because of this, you have begun to attach yourself to his hip more often than not-- and recently, that includes while out in the public area. It doesn't matter if he's busy with flyers or a performance -- you will walk over to him without restraint, hug him, and hold his hand as he so sweetly offers to escort you to where you're headed.

It's innocent, sweet, full of love and joy. You never thought, walking with him, that anybody else could perceive it as anything different. How someone's biases could distort such a simple picture into one so warped and befouled you couldn't comprehend it.

You are an accomplice. You are part of their evil. Their devil-worshipping, human-trafficking satanic ring. You lure people in. You fool people into thinking they are kind, harmless. You help them.

you

yOu

YOU

YOU ARE EVIL----

And evil must be eliminated.

To you, Pierrot is a just a kind, shy, quiet, emotional, somewhat peculiar man. Yes, you understand how it can be creepy -- but you've always been good at seeing past the surface, looking into people's true selves. Pierrot was not allowed to talk, and that didn't help his case, but he was just a sweet individual who wanted to be lovedd.

How could people not want to take the time to see him for who he truly is?

....

Oh, you poor, empathetic soul. How could you have possibly known what was coming?

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.

.

For the past two weeks, you decided to attend his show every night the circus was open. Part of your growing adoration for him, of course, included his art -- something that inspired and awoke within you a fire of passion for his pure dedication to the beauty of performance art. Watching him soar in the air as he performed acrobatic stunts, staring into his soul as he danced hypnotically, as he threw the knives at the human "props" -- oh, how it ignited you! He was perfection! You sometimes even envied his grace.

Yet, of course, Pierrot only performed for you, and his gaze only found you in the crowd as he felt that same fire raging within him. A desire to do his best, be his best, for you. And his best, he was. His performances were second to none. It was unlike anything his family had ever seen before. Your pure obsession, unbridled attention, and deep love for his craft that went beyond simple adrenaline rushes convinced him you were truly meant to be together. No matter when or where, you would always have a front row seat at his show for, well... forever.

You, of course, didn't know that yet.

For now, you only kept attending, and on an unassuming night like any other, you closed the cafe and made your way over to the circus, using his glittering red tent as a beacon for your journey.

Lately, you've been crossing through an abandoned alley to make your way over. You knew it wasn't very smart or safe, sure, but it was quicker and there was never anybody there. You knew Pierrot would be paranoid, so you never told him.

And thought you would still never have to as you took that familiar turn down into the dark path.

.....

Who is... what? It was so dark, yet you felt like you saw an outline of something that wasn't there before. What is that?

You kept walking.

The dark shapes began to take form. What was once a dark giant blob transformed into four smaller blobs, and those blobs grew heads, arms, and legs as your vision began to focus.

And the minute you realized, it was already too late.

"There you are."

Before you could react, before you could even tell yourself to run, run away, because there are people in this abandoned alley, you were surrounded by all sides by figures donned in all black with matching ski masks.

Your breathing grew rapid from sheer adrenaline, and you began to shake.

"What- what... what do you want--"

"You're that fucking piece of shit who hangs around all those monsters, huh?! Do you THINK we wouldn't fucking catch on? Fucking kidnapping people and sacrificing them?! And you, YOU-- " the voice sneered. It was the voice of a man. Why did it sound familiar? "You're a plant in this city that's been helping them. You've been helping them fucking kidnap and kill our women. We have TOLD you all to get the fuck out, but you NEVER listen! How many more people have you killed?! HOW MANY MORE?!" The man's voice rose to a yell so loud it rung your ears.

You couldn't breathe. Your shaking was uncontrollable now, and tears were now flowing down you face. "Please, sir please, just let me -- I don't know what you mean --"

"Of course you'd say that," he practically snarls at you. "Of course. But we know. And if they won't listen--"

He gestured at the others with a sign you didn't understand.

"Then we will leave a warning."

You watched the others advance. By their height, they all looked to be men.

In the dim light, you saw the eyes of the man who was speaking to you, and it finally clicked. Those words, that tone-- this was the man you defended Pierrot from that fateful day. Ever since then, has he watched you, plotting this ambush with others who support his cause? Were those the men on the internet forums you saw?

How could you have been so stupid?

With one simple sentence, he seals your fate.

"Do what you want, but kill them after."

The men lunged at you, and you saw the glint of a gun in one's hands for a brief moment. You screamed as loud as you can, a piercing, bloody scream that shook your eardrums and destroyed your voice as they tackled you down and began beating you with such force that it was impossible to process all the pain. One started kicking you in the mouth, and then your nose --CRACK! -- as another landed blows to your abdomen and the one with the gun began pistol whipping your skull. Not enough for you to pass out or be deadly-- enough to torture. To prolong the pain.

The gun itself was the end goal. That didn't mean they wouldn't make you suffer first.

Your screams turned into whimpers and then bloody gurgles as their violence grew relentless. Your eyes, which were closed, could no longer open because of being beaten, and you were sure you lost a multitude of teeth. Your ears rung from being boxed in, your head ached with an agony too terrible to name, and your ribs cracked with every sickening blow. They made sure to get your legs, too --kicking and punching wherever they could. Was your jaw broken? You didn't know.

You could hear the painful squelches, crunches, the feeling of bones giving way.

Just as you thought it would continue beating you forever, they stopped. And looked toward the man in charge, that same man you knew, as he sat there smiling the entire time. 

You tried to crack open your eyes a little and saw their blurry figures. Your ears rung, but could still make out muffled sounds.

You watched as they looked toward their leader for the next direction, as if to say "What do we do next?"

He seems to rather enjoy watching you writhe and curl in upon yourself.

"Bite the curb. Then finish them off if you still have to."

They came and started dragging you over to the curb of the sidewalk just outside the alley. It was dark, so dark, there was nobody there. Why?

I am going to die. Is this how I die?

For a fleeting moment, you thought of one more thing.

Of one more person that had no idea you were here, who thought you were coming, and who couldn't find you or help you.

I'm sorry, Pierrot. I'm not able to make it to your show.

As they lined your mouth up with the curb, you only could pray that they would make it quick.

You cried as you heard one man go behind you.

It's over for me now.

.

.

.

?

Perhaps you thought you were hallucinating, perhaps not. But suddenly, in those torturous second as you awaited your violent end, you began to hear a roar. A roar so terrifying, primal, and ancient. Was it one of the men?

That roar was so incomprehensible in its rage, so loud, it shook you to your core. How could something like that even be real? Where is it coming from?

You felt the presence behind you shift, as if turning around. And just as soon as he did, they all began to scream.

The roar didn't stop. You heard screams of terror as the man was yanked from behind you to face the source of that terrible sound. 

They only grew worse. Their screams turned into pleading, begging -- only into more screams, this time truly excruciating.

You heard sounds of snapping, ripping, tearing, bones from bones, limbs from limbs.

What was happening? Were you next?

Warm liquid seeped from the ground onto your clothes. The screams became choked, gurgled -- and slowly, ever so slowly, faded into nothing.

.

.

.

"My dear, oh God, please, please, please, por favor, eu imploro, fique comigo, eu estou aqui, oh Deus, não, não, não me deixe, eu não posso te perder, meu amor, meu tudo, POR FAVOR --"

You could recognize that voice anywhere by now. At least, the voice of the first half of that sentence -- the second half didn't even sound human.

Pierrot. 

He is here.

He is crying, sobbing uncontrollably.

He immediately pulled your head away from the curb as gently as he could, trying his best to keep your body and spine aligned without causing any further injuries.

"Oh Deus, o que eles fizeram?! Eu deveria ter matado eles mais devagar, aqueles monstros, aqueles bastardos imundos --!!"

He gently, oh so gently, turned you over in his arms and picked you up to hold you in his chest. He didn't seem to realize, in his frenzy, that he switched over to his native tongue.

And you... you smiled at him. You, in all your pain and fading consciousness, weakly smiled with your bloody mouth, which only made him cry harder.

He was shaking so hard. I've never heard somebody cry like this before. It's okay, I'm okay. How can I tell him that?

Pierrot tried to compose himself, to stop his shakes and hysteria to keep you steady. Snap out of it.

"My love, my love, I am here, don't worry, I am taking you to doctor now, I swear, those bad men are gone, you are safe now, I will protect you with my life."

You leaned into his chest. He was so warm.

"Please, keep your eyes open, my dear... 

So warm. Like it was inviting you into a deep, peaceful slumber.

"MY DEAR!"

.

.

.

There was nothing. And in that nothing, it was peaceful, and from that nothing, as your consciousness stirred, the first thing you felt was pain.

Pain

PAIN--

You couldn't speak. Couldn't open your eyes. Are you alone? Did you die? Are you in hell?

You felt bandages covering you from head to toe, almost like a mummy. What happened?

You managed to focus enough to hear distant voices in the background. One was emotional, the other calm and calculating, and the other one... agitated.

"Pierrot... need to leave...again...rampage...blood...killed...men...injuries...broken...recover...stay...

You heard only certain words, floating in your mind like word soup.

You decided to wiggle your fingers. Surprisingly, it worked, but just barely. Your eyes fluttered underneath your eyelids, and you decided it was time.

Open your eyes.

...

"MY LOVE!!"

You were immediately consumed by irises of gold and black.

"Can you hear me?! Are you alright? Oh God, I was so afraid, it's okay, it's okay --"

"I will need you to back off from the patient, Pierrot. They have just woken up, and need time to adjust to their surroundings without you overwhelming them."

The man with the crow mask -- you've met him before a couple times, and have come to know him as doctor -- entered your field of vision.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw a figure in purple exit out of the tent flap quietly, seemingly indifferent to the situation.

Pierrot growled lowly, and sat down, taking your hand in his. "They are not a 'patient,' doctor. They are my love.'"

To that, doctor said nothing, and turned to look at you.

"How are you feeling, sweetie?"

You opened your mouth and ... groaned.

Pierrot whimpered in response.

"That is to be expected, sweetie. What happened to you was truly awful, and you sustained quite the amount of injuries. A concussion, a direct jaw fracture near your left temporomandibular joint on the maxilla, a dislocated knee, broken nose, eardrum ruptures in both ears as well as auricular hematomas in both, and multiple rib fractures from blunt force trauma to the chest and abdomen. As well as bruising in the eyes and... well, everywhere. I'm also sorry to say you lost a couple of teeth as well. Sweetie... it is a truly a miracle you survived. If Pierrot didn't come..."

Doctor was interrupted by yet another growl from Pierrot.

"Do not speak of such things."

"Very well." The Doctor did not seem keen on testing Pierrot's limits. "But rest assured that you are under the best of care, my dear patient, and I will work to ensure a speedy and safe recovery while providing you with everything you require. It will be a long road, but I will be sure to monitor your progress at all times, much better than a human hospital ever could.

Well, at least that was comforting. By that point, while fuzzy, you could remember bits and pieces of what happened to you, and you were sure it would be the end for you.

Wait... did he just say "human hospital"?  What does that mean?

You tried to open your mouth a little, but the doctor immediately stopped you.

"Ah, I wouldn't do that, sweetie. We must minimize all movement. I have multiple bandages in place and will need you to limit speaking as much as possible. I am afraid we will have to put you on a liquid diet until your jaw fully recovers, as well as limit bright lights and noises. I will conduct an extensive neurological exam later, but for now, I will leave you to rest and be with Pierrot as I grab more morphine for the IV."

With that, doctor made a swift departure to another side of his tent, leaving you to process and Pierrot to fawn over you.

"My dear..." he squeezed your hand. "I know you must have so many questions, but please, just rest, you don't need to say anything," he looks at you with a teary gaze as his voice cracks. "As much as I adore the sound of your voice, you must recover first. I know you must be so confused, meu amor. But I will start here."

He slowly begins to stroke his long fingers up your arm in a soothing motion.

"It is night. My show has been canceled, and don't even think about feeling guilty for it." He knows you so well, even though you were the one literally attacked. "I was nearby when I heard your screams and decided to come to find you. The men ran off, and I took you here to Doctor's tent, where you will remain until recovery."

The tears welling in his eyes started to roll down his porcelain mask now.

"I am so sorry I couldn't protect you, couldn't stop them in time, couldn't prevent this, Oh God, I thought you were dead --"

He started to shake, but your faint squeeze brought him back to your comforting gaze. It's okay. You came for me. You couldn't have known.

Yet, in the back of your mind, that doesn't explain what you heard. The roars, screaming, begging for mercy, the sound of skin tearing and muscles ripping. Was Pierrot leaving something out?

Your head hurt too much to think about it, but you decided to push it aside for now.

"Here you are the one injured, and yet you are looking after me," Pierrot sniffles. "I meant it when I said I will protect you with my life. Those men will never hurt you again."

In your mind, that meant jail, or perhaps the fear of being caught. As for Pierrot, well... that meant something entirely different. The men physically couldn't, after all, they were... unrecoverable by now.

"I love you more than anything. You will stay here with me at the circus, where no one can hurt you ever again. I will take care of you, nurture you, cherish you with all that I am, and worship you in every way that you deserve. I do not deserve your forgiveness, as I cannot forgive myself, but I will spend every day making it up to you. I will never leave you."

He stared at you with an intensity so great it was almost painful. What does he mean stay here? I know to recover, but does he mean...

"Yes, I will never leave you, just as you will never leave me. We will be together, from now--"

He smiles a long, pointy grin at you. It was a crazed smile unlike anything you've seen before, from the man who just saved your life.

Why do you feel so scared?

"--Until the end of time."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Judgment has come, not just for the fate of those men, but for you, too. . . .

Translations!

1. "please, I beg you, stay with me, I'm here, oh God, no, no, don't leave me, I can't lose you, my love, my everything, PLEASE --"

2. "Oh God, what did they do?! I should have killed them slower, those monsters, those filthy bastards --!!"

You always admired Jack for how naturally caring and doting he was, like it was second nature for him. Even when you worried he would get tired, or even annoyed with you, he would laugh softly at you while ruffling your hair and say "Don't ever think that way, Sunshine! I love taking care of you!"

And it was true. Sunny Day Jack, all smiles and radiance, really did enjoy taking care of you, even coddling you at times. You were just so cute, sweet, and grateful, and any excuse he had to be close to you in some way made him feel loved, cherished, and important -- like he was still a big part of your world. Truthfully, he needed you as much as you needed him -- you were everything he could have hoped for and more. After spending so long in such a dark hellscape, he longed for you like a flower longed for sunshine.

Sunshine.

That's what you were to him. The day after the endless night, the star shining in the eternal void. He was forever indebted to you -- and he would continue loving and caring for you forever.

So, it was no big deal to him when you fell sick with the flu. His poor sunspot! His heart squeezed in sympathy at seeing you feel so poorly.

As for you, you didn't even see it coming. One day, you were fine -- enjoying Jack's warm cuddles, eating his breakfast, and going to work-- the next, you woke up with a sore throat, runny nose, and body aches all over.

Fuck.

You told yourself it would be fine, this just happens sometimes, human bodies just sometimes downgrade for a day, so you kept getting ready for work and ignored the nausea creeping up in your stomach.

It's fine. If I deny it, and pretend it doesn't exist, then it will go away, right?

Right?

You got dressed and walked into the kitchen to greet Jack, who was just setting blueberry pancakes on the table. Again.

He looked up and beamed at you.

"Good morning, Sunshine! How did you sleep?"

"Good morning! I slept good-" Woah. Did your voice actually sound like that? It sounded like someone was playing it back through a scratchy vinyl.

"...Are you okay, Sunspot? You look pale. Do you think you might be getting sick?" Jack stared at you with those beautiful dark eyes full of concern.

"No. I'm sure I'm just tired but thank you, honey." You loved him so much. Ugh. He was too kind. You just wanted to grab the red marks on his cheeks and squish them together from cuteness aggression.

Unfortunately for you, that would not follow through. Because as you walked towards the kitchen table, you caught a whiff of the pancakes, and your body decided that something so usually appetizing would instead make you feel even more nauseated, the smell making bile rise in your throat.

You took one look at Jack.

Turned around.

And ran to the bathroom.

You hurled into the toilet, and not even a second later Jack was behind you (how did he get here that fast?) holding your hair away as you continued to retch.

"Oh sweetheart, it's okay," he cooed, rubbing his large hand on your back "I'm here, I got you, I'll take care of you."

You turned to look around at him after you were done.

"I'm so sorry, you shouldn't see this, I don't want to be gross, let me brush my teeth--"

"Sunshine, you could never gross me out. You're sick, and all of this is normal. Here," he gently wrapped his arms around you and pulled you to stand. "Let's brush your teeth and get you to bed."

Jack gently massaged your shoulders as you cleaned yourself up in the sink, and without warning, swept you up in his arms to carry you over to your bed.

"Jack! You don't have to do that!" You hoped he thought the red flush on your face was just from being sick.

"I want to. Isn't that enough?"

You never knew someone's eyes could hold as much adoration as his. Being looked at so gently, not to mention pairing that with how effortlessly he lifted you, had you internally squealing as you buried your face between the junction of his shoulder and neck. He was so warm.

After (reluctantly) laying you down in bed, Jack went off to get a thermometer, painkillers, tissues, and water while you settled under the sheets. Any last thought of you going to work was further erased when Jack read the temperature.

"101?! Oh no, you are staying here. No ifs ands or buts. There is no way you are working when you're this sick! You need to stay here with me."

You giggled, already feeling a little delirious. The way he talked was so silly, and yet, you could tell by looking at him that he was completely serious, so much so that it almost unnerved you a bit.

"Okay, okay, okay! I give up. Let me shoot Barry a text and then I'll rest, I'm sure he'll understand."

So quiet that it was almost imperceptible, you heard Jack mutter "He better," with a stony look on his face before he beamed and looked at you once again. "I know this might sound bad, but I'm glad that this means we can spend the whole day together, though I wish you weren't sick."

You smiled at him. "I couldn't think of a better person to spend my sick day with, Jack. Thank you so much. I love you."

You saw Jack cough a little before looking away, his eyes a little watery before he faced you again.

"I love you too, Sunshine. Now come here."

He walked towards you and began to climb into the bed when you held out your arm.

"Wait! You're gonna--"

Wait. Uh, can Jack-- can Jack even get sick? Because, you know, he's not exactly....?

"What?"

"Oh. nothing, sorry, haha."

He chuckled before he finally settled in, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you to his chest to be the small spoon.

"Let's just rest for now, and once your stomach has settled a bit, I'll make you some soup and anything else that you need, does that sound good?"

"Mmh," is all you could respond with.

He pulled you tighter and set his chin on your shoulder as he began to hum, lightly tracing one hand up your arm to soothe you and placing gentle kisses on the back of your head. It's too much and everything you need all at once, and you found the edges of your vision growing fuzzy within minutes while all you thought about was Jack's warmth.

I'm warm. I'm safe. I can rest now.

And with that, you are off and away to sleep.

.

.

.

.

.

.... Meanwhile, Jack felt your breath slowing and body relaxing as you dozed off. Unfortunately for you, your nose was so congested that you had to resort to breathing out of your mouth, which caused you to snore slightly.

But to Jack, it was all so endearing.

"Sunshine," he whispered. His voice carried a slight tremor. "I want to take care of you like this forever. Please. Please let me. Please stay."

His arms grew tighter around you, and within his heart are surging feelings of love and pure, utter madness.

"I love you, I always will," he continued. His eyes are completely crazed with obsession.