#pierrot

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UGH.

That seemed to be the only word fitting for your situation right now. Well, the proper word wouldn't even be a coherent word, more like an EEUEUEUAAHGGHH, as that seemed to convey the agony a little bit better.

Your period started this morning, and it came full force and without mercy. So naturally, you were huddled up in your bed, heating pad turned to the max setting, and yet, your bed  -- hell, your whole ROOM -- felt way too hot and stuffy, but you can't exist without the heating pad. It's like accepting one form of torture for the sake of easing another that's much worse, but of course, the heating pad can only do so much.

You had already taken the maximum amount of painkillers recommended, and are waiting for the hours to finish up until you can take more, so there's only one thing left to do--

Sit there and bear it.

Thankfully, it was your day off, and even if it wasn't, you knew your boss would be more than accommodating, even if he doesn't understand completely what's going on. No man really truly does, but the more sympathetic they can be, the better.

Speaking of men...

Pierrot.

You knew he had a show tonight, and the night before when he came to visit you, you told him you'd be happy to attend his show for the umpteenth time, as you basically had a free pass and you and Pierrot had grown extremely close ever since his time here. You knew he looked forward to seeing you there, and you'd be sure to shower his pure art and athleticism with endless praise, which always made him red as a cherry and clingy in that way you absolutely adored.

He was a big, strong man, literally swinging effortlessly from swing to swing in his acrobatic stunts and throwing kunai knives with unimaginable force, but yet...

He looked at you with a gentleness and vulnerability that made your heart squeeze, carried with a heavy undercurrent of adoration (and obsession) that you have never seen in a gaze before. 

You would be lying if you said it didn't do anything to you.

Of course, lacking the oversight to remember your period and just how much it affected you, and saying yes to attending his show without hesitation, you felt immensely guilty that you couldn't go (there was just no way), and it was made even worse by the fact that you had no way to tell him.

You didn't have his phone number or any contact information, but yet, a part of you almost wondered if he even had a phone at all. Perhaps he did but wasn't allowed to carry it while working? But what about emergencies?

However, he did give off major home-schooled vibes, so you really are unsure if he does.

You groaned and rolled around on your abdomen to put direct pressure on your abdomen and hopefully force the heating pad to penetrate deeper. At this point, you didn't even care if you got toasted skin syndrome -- it was a small price to pay for any kind of relief.

Why did we women have to get cursed like this? What was the point? Why does the body do this every month? Seems like a very insufficient and flawed design system. Fuck you, evolutionary process.

Suddenly, you heard a tap-tap-tap against your window. 

Ah.

It was still a couple hours until his show, so you should have anticipated he might come. In your state, you just couldn't think about it, let alone think at all.

You didn't even get up, just lifted and extended your arm back and waved for him to come in while your face was squished in the pillow. You kept it unlocked now pretty much all the time. That was probably a bad thing, getting used to this, but Pierrot was just so sweet and adorable and damnit, if he wanted to come in through the balcony, he can come in through the balcony!

He came in right away and slid the door shut, zipping across the room right away and immediately kneeling at the foot of your bed while taking your extended hand in his, and you turned to look at him.

What you saw made you unsure of whether to laugh or cry.

He looked so concerned it was actually unreal. His whole frame trembled and shook, and his eyes were big and watery as he frantically stroked your hand while breathing erratically.

Did he think you were on your deathbed?

What you didn't know, you poor dear, was that to Pierrot, you practically were. You had just no idea how "homeschooled" this man really was, and all he knew is that when he came in, he immediately caught on to the scent of blood that permeated the air and grew stronger as he drew closer to you. That, coupled with your obvious distress, made him almost undone with anxiety.

He suspected that something was up, but he wasn't sure. After all, the night before, you did smell different, but not of blood or anything, just... different. He couldn't put his finger on it. You also seemed more tired as well, with more specific food cravings as well as a little grumpy, so he just assumed you had a tough day at work (of course, not without asking if anybody specifically caused you trouble, to which you laughed it off).

However, this smell was unmistakably blood, but it was...different. Deeper. The scent profile was muskier. He did faintly recognize it, maybe when closer to some of the fools at the circus, but truth be told, the entire circus reeked of blood at every corner and there was no concern nor reason to investigate it.

But for you, he was very concerned.

"My lady?! Are you alright, meu amor?! What's happening?! Do I need to take you to doctor?! Are you in a lot of pain?!  What ails you?!" his voice was cracking with fear, almost unconsolable at the fact that you were experiencing pain and he had no idea how to help you. While panicked, he didn't want to give away too much with his words, letting you know he could actually smell the blood itself, making you suspicious of him and -- God forbid-- see him for what he was. He would never let that happen.

You stared at him, unblinking.

For a good, long time.

Oh my God.

Is this guy serious?

Your blank stare actually made him shake even harder.

Oh no, something is truly wrong with my lady!

You blinked, and then...you laughed.

Actually laughed at him.

You laughed so hard, you got tears in your eyes as well, and Pierrot looked completely dumbfounded as you laughed at this poor man's cluelessness. But how could you help yourself?

"Pierrot, it's alright? I am okay! Everything is fine! I don't need any help. I am just on my period" you chuckled while letting out an exaggerated sigh "Uuuuughhh... always the hardest time of the month, am I right? But Pierrot, do you... do you seriously not know what a period is?"

His void-like eyes boring into your soul only confirmed your suspicion.

"Uh okay, uh... wow. Really? I mean sorry, I don't mean to be rude or anything, but uh... did you ever learn? Nobody ever told you? I mean, you never met a girl who does? Uhh..."

You were truly befuddled.

This man was more sheltered than you thought. What, was the circus part of some sort of religious fundamentalism? 

Was Pierrot raised by monks?

Truth be told, before Pierrot met you, he had NO interest in anything to do with humans or their fragile ailments. Doctor did try to sit him down for lessons to teach him about human anatomy and biology, but every time Pierrot told him he was not interested and Doctor eventually gave up altogether. Pierrot was never really the type to try and push or convince. Even Jester mentioned to Doctor that he had no need to know, after all, it was better to keep him safe from humans and their inferior processes.

"My lady, are you sure? I must admit, I have never heard of a "period," but you say it is normal? Then why do you look so in pain?" His voice wobbled. He moved from his kneeling position near your bed to sit and stroke your hair out of your face.

"Yeah, sorry, haha, I know that must look bad," you moved to sit up, and you winced a little. You could have sworn you heard a small, deep whine from the back of Pierrot's throat at your action, but perhaps you were overthinking it. "But it's normal, well, at least for me and a lot of women."

Good thing was Pierrot seemed to have calmed down significantly, but he was still on edge. He wrapped his arm around you as he climbed into the bed fully and you leaned into his side, much to his happiness.

"Why are you apologizing for, my lady? You should never apologize for anything," Pierrot looked at you with a deep, irreversible obsession. "Please, do tell me everything."

Ugh, he was so good and such an eager listener. 

"Well, I guess I should start from the beginning, ha. Basically -- Oh God I'm gonna explain this so bad--" you rubbed your hands over your face. "It's so complex, and there are many variables, but basically, when a woman is just letting nature do its thing, not on any birth control or meds or anything, or doesn't have any hormonal imbalances or disorders, the body prepares each month for pregnancy after it releases an egg, which causes a thick, bloody tissue called "endometrial lining" in the uterus, er-- womb so that the environment is conducive to having a baby. Think of it like 'Hey! We prepared and did all this work and we want you to get pregnant!' But here's the kicker, if nothing happens, if the egg isn't fertilized and doesn't turn into a baby and go into the womb, then the body's like 'Well, what the fuck? We did all this work for nothing, gotta get rid of it now,' and then the tissue and blood come out through the closest exit, which is..."

You gestured down, shy.

"Well, there."

It looked like major gears were turning in Pierrot's head, and you fully expected to see smoke from just how hard he was thinking about it. Slowly, things started to click into place, and Pierrot looked at you with such surprise that it looked like he found the meaning of life.

"My lady... and this happens every month?"

You nodded.

"Yes. The pain comes from cramps from the uterus contracting to expel the tissue, and for women, the pain varies all across. Some women don't experience any, lots do, and for some it's completely debilitating."

He looked at you with both fear and determination, like he wanted to fight off the pain himself.

"My lady, is there anything I can do? I swear to you, I will do everything in my power to make this pain go away, or at least diminish as much as possible. Whatever you need, my lady, I am here, at your service, at your feet. I am willing to move the stars in the sky, should you ask for it. Anything, meu amor! I will do anything. What do you need?"

Your heart felt like it was about to burst.

He doesn't understand it fully still but yet, he wants to help so badly. He wants to understand.

How many men can you say even want to do that, or even try?

"Thank you, Pierrot. You are truly a gem, you know that? Right now, I have a heating pad on to help with the cramps, but I would love for you to cuddle me close and maybe just gently rub my stomach, if that's alright with you."

You didn't even need to ask him twice. He immediately scooped you in his arms and laid down with you as a big spoon, wrapping his arms around you and beginning to gently run them over your stomach.

"Oh, my lady, you need not worry or ever ask again, to touch you like this... what bliss! To feel the warmth of your skin, your presence, and your kind words... you are the one blessing me! Please, let me do this for you forever. It is a joy to be close to you like this, to be the one who eases your pain! To think you go through this every month, and yet you endure so bravely, so beautifully, my lady, you are divinity!"

He shuddered from behind you.

Wow. Oh boy.

"Oh, haha...thanks Pierrot. It's so great having you here too and being with you. You are the best." Is that enough? You didn't know if you could process all his intensity right now... In the past, you wondered if it was even performative just from how unbelievable it sounds, but now you know Pierrot, and the truth is unmistakable.

His words are, without a doubt, 100% sincere.

"Please, do not thank me, my lady. It is I who should be thanking you. Now rest, and I will protect you and hold you in my arms until the morning, and then you can tell me more about this "period" -- I wish to learn everything for you, meu amor. But for now, please--"

He gently kissed the top of your head.

"Sleep."

You almost felt like crying from how sweet it is. You couldn't see his face, but you wondered what it looked like then. You nodded, hoping he could see it, and nestled further into his muscular embrace as he enveloped you from all sides like a grounding, nurturing force. Your eyelids grew heavy, your movements slow, and you breathed in relaxation as Pierrot watched you with hearts in his eyes.

And soon, with you safely nestled in his embrace, you both drifted off into a comfortable, peaceful sleep.

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Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it! I actually proofread this time!