Agent Hawaii

cutting a glory hole in the fourth wall

it’s called a “happy” trail for a reason… i see a man’s happy trail and i start jumping up and down in excitement saying “yay” “yippee” “this is the best day ever” “woohoo” and other things in that vein… u would too if u had any soul

bro doesnt even have the jennies (certain je ne sais quois)

i still dont know what backshots is i assume its when your friend bends over so you can stabilize your rifle betwern there butcheeks

Do y'all think I could get away with putting googly eyes on the back of the Counselor's head?

You definitely can, because I already managed to do so twice. Just don't say you've heard it from me.

i got that dog in me

my parents trying to figure out what to get me for christmas

i should mention that my roommate was on a video call with nasa while i was making this in the background

i see ass nasa is making the rounds again so might be a good time to add on that last semester, one of my precalc classmates pulled this post up on their phone to show me and i had to sit there and pretend that i wasnt the idiot who made it. cheers

These people were drawing dicks on the ground with the sun in 1000 BCE. All you fools messing with Sharpies need to step up your game.

pussy game so strong it scared the devil

no but literally that is what is happening, there have been long periods of western history where spirits were said t be frightened by the site of lady business. Sailor’s wives used to flash their husbands ships (mind you this was a time before underwear so you just lifted your petticoats and BAM) in order to scare away the spirits and devils that made storms. A woman could flash her crops to keep away spirits that might ruin them.This was also back when the vagoo was seen as something taboo and horrible so literally looking directly at some labia was thought to be so scary the devil would poop himself. Misogyny so intense it gave the pussy superpowers. 

Anásyrma is the gesture of lifting the skirt or kilt and indeed has a whole history of supernatural effects both negative and positive. Here’s the wiki on it: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anasyrma

Official Pussy Post

#lost in a fugue of penis delerium

did you try jerking it off and back on again

and how many of those synonyms am I actually willing to use

@official-penis-posts