Use pattern recognition to find long term solutions
Once you have a big problem, assume it will happen again in your lifetime.
Debt, miscommunication, grief, depression, anxiety, unemployment, illness, breakup ....
Life is unpredictable and for a myriad of reasons you will face the same issues over and over again.
Be it financial, relationship or work related you should consider a solution that will work for a lifetime and not only for now.
Think of life in the long term by recognizing your own patterns.
If you keep over explaining it's a communication issue with you. If you don't have time, it's a prioritisation issue and management issue with you. If you are underpaid it's your skill issue. If you keep having the same fight with multiple partners it's an behavioral issue with you. If you never have money it's a money management issue with you.
Taking accountability for an issue, even if you feel that you did not cause it, is recognizing that there is a pattern happening and somehow that is related to you.
If you do your part to solve the problem and make sure that there is a plan in place for when it happens again you will be less likely to suffer bad and long consequences. Especially if it is a financial blow.
For habit changes making micro and macro goals works. 90 days plans work. But as soon as you hit that one year mark look back.
What worked? What didn't? Did you pivot or quit? Did you have to stop for any reason and could you have handled it differently? If the issue dragged for a long time could you have benefited from expert and paid help?
Answer these questions and find solutions for the next time.