Annabel Caye (Outcast)

"Does that mean a sick person can become healthy? Even someone like me?" she asked, her eyes glistening. Her fingers brushed along the spine. The woman gasped, pulling the book closer to her chest, as though a shield. Caleb narrowed his eyes as the girl retracted to her spot on the floor, taking her warmth along with it as she glided from his lap.

He didn't understand the adults that "cared for them" at the shelter. They had marketed themselves as better than their life before, but why force themselves to fulfill that role, as if just simply reading mere tales to them every day was enough to make up for it, when they actively kept their distance? No one ever wanted to comfort or touch them.

The only thing we're good for is what's inside us.

The woman's eyes scurried to his, and she froze. Seeing what reflected in his gaze, she closed her eyes on a exhale. When she opened them again, she looked back down at the girl, and this time a soft smile curled her lips, so soft that one may think it actual genuine. But if that had been the case, then she would've been so from the start. "Yes. Especially you."

Caleb scoffed, crossing his arms. But the girl turned her glistening eyes to him.

"Caleb! Should we try it?"

He froze. The girl from the story never got her wish. It was proof that the legend was fake. Caleb didn't want her to turn into another sob story. Not when she was the only warmth, the only scrap of affection, he had ever gotten in this god forsaken place, a place that was cold even in the summer. He had already been without her once, and that had made life incredibly dull. He didn't think he'd survive another time.

"Weren't you listening? It's just a fairy tale. Wishes don't do anything. And even if they did, there's always loop holes."

Heavy silence consumed his words. The girl pouted at him, her lower lip wobbling. The rippled movement of her throat reminded him of a galliforme—not that he had ever seen one, but it looked an awful lot like the illustrations on the toys around the shelter and the pictures he had studied in books about birds, because he had nothing else to do, and he was fascinated by all areas of flight. But he was pretty sure her chin wasn't shaking because she wanted to impress him, and he had a feeling that teasing her about that now would only make her face worse.

Was that not the right thing to say? But it was the truth.

The woman closed the book, marking the end of his thoughts. "Well, believing is better than wallowing in despair. Sometimes faith is all you have left."

The woman walked away. They were now the only two left in the empty play area, the other children hiding in their rooms. The girl shifted her gaze to outside. The window was just a foggy mass of gray. A distant roar of a Wanderer gently rumbled the floor of the shelter as lights flickered on and off.

The deathly quiet was killing him.

"Okay, I'll bite. What's got you in such a mood, Pip-squeak?" Caleb asked. "Why are you so obsessed with that paper crane legend?"

One roar hit too close to home as dust settled between them, the ceiling sprinkling from the thunder. The girl curled into herself.

"Caleb, there are a lot of monsters outside," she finally spoke, her voice a mere whisper. "Will the world end tomorrow?"

Oh. Caleb swallowed. He hadn't realized.

Caleb had been so focused on making sure she didn't end up like the girl in the story that he failed to consider how she must have felt. It was sometimes easy to forget, with how she always managed a smile on her face even in the toughest of times. She was the one who got him through his day, but what was he doing to help her get through hers? That was an awful habit of his. Really, when was the last time they were able to just breathe? There had been too much uncertainty going around, looming over their heads, threatening their lives. Peace shattered ever since the girl was diagnosed with a heart condition and a time limit. With the rise of Wanderers in the skies and illness reports, doctors have been visiting the shelter to keep an eye on the growing pandemic, having yet to determine what the cause of this new condition could be. The children were told to remain inside while the situation was monitored, so Caleb had never been able to take her to the garden again, like how he had cheered her up before. The girl never said anything, hiding all her selfish desires behind that forced smile, so he assumed everything was alright. But Caleb knew better than anyone else that being cooped up in a single place wasn't pleasant, so the isolation must have been eating her alive, with nowhere else to escape bleak reality.

So if the girl wanted to cling onto hope... then Caleb had to oblige. If she was worried the world would end tomorrow, then Caleb just had to make sure it didn't end. He would take her back to the secret place, come what dangerous monsters may, and he would fight off any threat that tried to take her away from him. She had nothing to be afraid of as long as he was there, because he would always protect her and show her that life was worth living. But he could only be this fearless as long she was there with him. The story ended with the girl's death, a fruitless endeavor. But his desire for her to live was stronger than the will of the gods. He wouldn't allow such an event to transpire. If she wanted a different end to her story, then he would craft an even better one where they actually lived through the ending together.

Even if Caleb disagreed with her methods, if that was what she wanted, he would give it to her. He'd do anything for her. He had to provide the answer she was looking for, the smiles and joy and hope, the optimism, so she wouldn't keep dwelling in despair.

Caleb brushed his shoulder against hers. Nudging her cheek, he switched her attention back to him. "There's no need to be afraid of the end of the world. Where do you wanna go today? Let's have some fun."

He was going to get her mind off this gloom if it was the last thing he would do. He rather her focus on him instead of uncertain death. It wasn't that he had been secretly longing to go back to the garden himself, to escape the growing suffocation in search of fresh air. Not at all.

The girl lifted her head, color reappearing in her eyes as she cheered, wrapping her arms around his neck, "...The amusement park!"

She fit perfectly under his chin, and Caleb found himself embracing her back. He smirked at her, bringing his finger to his lips. "Alright. I'll come get you at night. Wait for my signal. We have to sneak out, so let's make it a secret mission."

Later that night, Caleb stared up at the large pagoda tree in the garden.

What better way to get closer to the stars and the world outside these walls? If the garden was no longer safe, then they needed a safer place. The tree would hide them, and they would be free to dream without any fear of ruin.

He hugged the bark, his feet scraping the wood, pulling himself up, climbing the tree to the topmost branch. And with that, he had a perfect view. The branch directly led to the window on the upper floor of the shelter, right where her bed was. He had first noticed this angle back in her bedroom.

Admittedly, perhaps he had snuck out a few times before despite the restriction, just to see if he could climb it. He was testing his physical strength, and he wanted a closer look at the planes that fell from the sky. He never intended to actually use it for her.

Okay, maybe the thought had crossed his mind once or twice before.

His feet dangled from the branch, swinging up and down. This was his first successful attempt. Not like there was any other choice. It had to have been, for his plan to work. He pulled out a page of colored origami paper he stashed into his pocket. He folded the paper into the shape of a crane as best he could, gazing at her favorite spring ride buried in the sand as reference, crisping the edges. Then aiming it at the window, he blew on the wings, and it floated in the air, soaring into the window, where it gently tapped the glass once, twice.

A second later, the window dragged open, and the girl's head peeked out. Her eyes widened at him. "Caleb?"

He held his hand out to her, the paper crane hovering by his side. "Come on. Adventure awaits."

Let me take you to a world where it's just us, where no one can hurt us. Our perfect little fantasy.

The girl blinked. Giggling, she scrambled out the window, then shakily slid up the branch. The paper crane circled around her, guiding her.

"This is new," the girl yelped, clinging onto Caleb once she got close enough.

"Well, it would get boring if we always did the same thing, right?" Caleb shrugged. "Plus, you said you like the stars."

The girl stared at the paper crane as it nuzzled her cheek. "I thought you didn't like that story."

"Well, it has some merit," he said, landing the paper crane into her palm. "I promise to give you a thousand paper cranes until you get healthy again. So from now on, enjoy a better world tomorrow instead of fearing the end. You won't die as long as you have me."

He needed her, and she needed him. That was a fact that would forever remain true. She was the only one who ever chose to be near him, and he was the only one who ever indulged her.

No one else wanted them. No one else would stay. No one else could relate to the feelings and situations they had gone through. They only had each other. As long as he could ensure that, then that was all they would require. And he'd do whatever it took to keep her alive. Because without her, he'd be alone in the dark again.

The girl gazed at him, then leaning in close, she brushed her fingers against his. "And you'll take me to paradise, each and every time."

*****

"So that's why he promised to fold you a thousand cranes?" Zayne asked.

"Yeah," the girl nodded. "He's always been creative. That's why I think he'd love this!"

She held up a badge. It was supposed to be an apple, but it looked more like a loopy blob of red strings. Zayne coughed. "That sure is... a unique texture."

"Is it that bad?" she pouted.

"Well, if you had been making a spider lily instead of an apple, it would pass," Zayne pointed out. But when that response only made her shoulders slump further, he awkwardly patted the curved blades. "It's your first time. You'll get better with practice."

"I didn't expect you to be skilled at something like this. You never seemed interested in any of the crafts Caleb did."

"Embroidery is not the same as building something up from scratch."

They sat criss-crossed on the floor of her bedroom. When the girl learned Zayne knew his way around a needle and thread, she invited him over to bring his kit. But when he arrived, the girl suddenly dragged Zayne into her home. Flustered and stumbling, the next thing he knew, he was alone with her in her room—the door closed. What was supposed to be a brief visit turned into a hostage interrogation as she demanded him to teach her how to embroider. It was nothing less than a kidnapping. He tried to meet her demands, but as always, she wasn't easy to teach.

"I wish I was as good as you, Zayne," the girl sighed, leaning over his shoulder. Zayne shifted as she got too close, her hair grazing his collarbone. He was once again very hyper aware of the fact that he was in her room. A private spot for a girl, not meant for a boy. He lowered his gaze, clutching the badge he had stitched himself. In his hands was a neatly outlined crane, with geometric edges similar to that of origami. He had remembered the promise Caleb made to her but had yet to fulfill. He hoped that maybe, he could make his own contribution to the number goal. But since it was a time before he had come along, he had inquired about the background significance of the paper crane to help aid his inspiration. The girl stroked the lines in his hands. "You're perfect at everything. Where did you learn how to stitch?"

"Dr. Fang taught me," Zayne cleared his throat, heat enveloping his face. "If I'm going to be a surgeon, I need to practice my sutures and precise motor skills."

The girl blinked at him. She scrunched her nose, making a face. "Su... motor... What does that even mean?"

Zayne sighed. "Forget it."

She pulled away from Zayne, giggling. "Caleb is gonna be so happy. His birthday technically passed, but since we were all busy with school, we couldn't celebrate. It's better this way, now that we're all free."

Caleb's birthday was June 13. It was also the day they were adopted. The girl had fought Caleb over who got to claim the day as their birthday, but in the end, Caleb won. She wasn't upset, though. His name meant summer after all, so it only made sense for his birthday to be in summer.

His first birthday in Linkon meant a year had already passed since they moved in with Josephine.

It was all the more special that they were spending the day with Zayne, even though it was closer to July now than June 13. But better late than never.

"Caleb? Happy?" Zayne shook his head. "With you, maybe. If I'm lucky, Caleb will use my gift as a reminder to not slack off on his progress. He never likes when I interfere."

Which makes it easy to get revenge.

"Of course you'd somehow make a gift a threat to do better," the girl clucked her tongue. "But you have to admit, I've made so much progress of my own, right? You guys wouldn't have gotten this close without my help. And now Caleb finally has a friend! One day, I'll make sure he gets along with everyone. Then they all can see how kind he really is."

Sure, Caleb may have been mean to Zayne when they first met, but he had slowly warmed up to him, even if he wouldn't admit it. The girl didn't miss the way his overprotectiveness and desire to make things right would also sometimes extend to Zayne, nor how Caleb never failed to include Zayne in on their adventures. If he truly hated Zayne, he could have just ignored him entirely, like how he had the bullies at school.

"He's only ever kind to you. We may be friends, but I still need to watch my back around him for any pranks," Zayne shuddered.

"He's still doing that?" the girl pursed her lips, pondering. That wasn't good. "Then we'll give him a sneak attack!"

She snatched Zayne's arm and dragged him once more, out of her room.

Caleb sat on the couch, playing some video game on the retro console in the living room. Josephine had given them the console on Caleb's actual birthday, and he had been rather addicted to it since. But of course, Caleb was always the first one to seek an escape from reality. When Zayne had showed up at their doorstep unannounced, Caleb had offered the extra controller to Zayne, but the girl had hurriedly ushered Zayne into her room before he could even decline or accept, which had left Caleb staring after them with a dark look on his face. Naturally, what kind of older brother would he be to just allow another boy enter his baby sister's room? Zayne had half expected him to be waiting on the other side of the door, ready to hound the girl for being careless, but it seemed he now found other ways to release his frustrations, such as the joys of taking it out on the TV.

As shooting sound effects blasted from the TV alongside the smashing of buttons, the girl signaled to Zayne. Lowering their bodies to the floor, they crawled their way to behind the couch, like soldiers navigating trenches in the middle of gunfire.

"Come on, come on," Caleb muttered under his breath. He was manning a starship and fending off enemies. Or maybe more accurately, chasing after enemies.

Just as the victory screen chimed, the girl jumped up, dropping the apple on Caleb's head. A tribute to that scientist guy he was always talking about whenever he wanted to make a joke about apples and gravity.

"Surprise!" the girl screeched in his ear.

Caleb whipped around, twisting his body. Before Zayne could do anything, the paper crane flew out of his hands and into Caleb's.

"What is this? A paper crane?" Caleb inspected the badge in his palm. He spoke nonchalantly, as if he had already been anticipating this. He was hardly ever caught off guard. He pulled off the one from his hair. "And an apple? It's so tiny."

"Hey, it was the best we can do!" the girl yelled. "So appreciate our efforts, okay?"

"This is what you shut me out of your room for? Poor Zayne. I don't even have to imagine how uncomfortable he was, stuck in a girl's room against his will. He should've just played with me when he had the chance."

Zayne blushed.

"It wasn't like that at all!" she stomped her foot, crossing her arms. "And Zayne doesn't like games. He wouldn't have played with you whether I was here or not. Seriously, it doesn't have to be that deep. He was just teaching me how to sew."

Caleb frowned. "Oh, really? Then, is this paper crane for me or for her?"

Zayne cleared his throat. "Both? It's my own wish for her good health, given to you."

Caleb stared at the paper crane. He scowled. "I could've done a better job than this. Just you wait. I'll leave your sewing skills in the dust."

Zayne's eye twitched. "Must you treat everything as a competition?"

"That's how you survive around here. You gotta be better than everyone else if you want to be useful."

"Sounds like an exhausting way to live," Zayne remarked. "If only you could use that energy towards more meaningful things, like getting rid of your procrastination, perhaps."

"Right, because everything just comes naturally to you, and you don't ever have to try," Caleb snarled. "Just like how you were born already the perfect adult, huh? So much so, that fun is beneath you."

The controller vibrated in his hands. Zayne's eyes widened. "Are you that upset I didn't join a game with you?"

"Would you play if I asked?" Caleb raised an eyebrow.

"Of course not. Games are for children."

Caleb blinked at him. The girl flitted her gaze between the two, gnawing on her fingernails. Caleb bursted out laughing, grabbing Zayne by the shoulder, but Zayne didn't miss the tight squeeze. "You just proved my point."

"But..." Zayne winced, throwing a glance in the girl's direction. "If you really wanted me to play with you that much, I guess I can give it a shot."

Tugging Zayne around the couch, Caleb tossed him the other controller and switched the settings to co-op mode. A few minutes later, both boys were hunched over—their gazes fixed on the TV.

The girl huffed, mumbling under her breath as she buried her chin into the couch cushions, "I thought you didn't like games, Zayne."

The front door opened, and the girl turned her head to see Josephine standing by the door, slipping off her shoes.

"Grandma!" the girl scrambled to her, feet sliding on the floor as she leaped onto the older woman. Josephine laughed, patting her head.

"Dammit," Caleb hurled his controller into the cushion beside him. "I lost focus. Why are you so good at this? Isn't this your first time playing?"

"I adapted quickly," Zayne pushed up his glasses. "After a while, I realized the game is only a matter of strategy and mathematics to excel."

Caleb grimaced. "You really can be scary sometimes. I wouldn't want to get on your bad side."

"That would require a lot of effort to begin with, seeing as you are not much of a threat."

"What did you say?" Caleb bristled.

"Xia Yizhou," Josephine scolded. "Watch your language. Zayne is a guest. Don't make me keep repeating myself."

Caleb rolled his eyes.

Josephine cleared her throat. Setting the girl down, she walked in front of the TV. "I know we couldn't do much for your birthday. So I arranged a little surprise with the help of your sister. How about a party at the amusement park?"

She revealed four tickets.

Caleb's eyes widened. He turned to Zayne, who was tearing at his lip. "You weren't forced into this, were you? Or is this the real reason why you came over today? You're seriously tagging along?"

"This is news to me," Zayne had stiffened. He felt like an outsider intruding on a family vacation. But looking into Caleb's eyes, any nerves he may have had about the sudden invitation slowly made way for a rare mischievous gleam. "Why, do you want me to go?"

When Caleb didn't say anything, Zayne shrugged. "Might as well. It will be a first time for all of us."

Caleb pursed his lips. "Bringing along a hostage wouldn't be fun. Besides, amusement parks aren't my thing. She's the one who always wanted to go. I'm just the excuse."

Zayne grinned. "Sure."

Caleb clucked his tongue. "But... since you're insisting..."

"Want me to sew the badges onto your clothes, birthday boy?" Zayne raised an eyebrow.

"Do whatever you want," Caleb whined, twisting his body away from him. But he didn't move beyond that, shutting his eyes.

"See, what did I tell you?" the girl laughed. "He's happy."

*****

"Is it wise to be spending all this money?" Caleb grumbled. "It's not like you're employed."

"Caleb Xia, never bring up someone else's employment status like that again," Josephine smacked his shoulder. "I still have funds saved up. I'll get a job when school starts again if that will make you happy."

Caleb averted his gaze. He caught a family of three, a mom and dad swinging their child between them. "I didn't say that."

The amusement park was crowded. And it was very, very hot. Almost too hot. His clothes stuck onto his skin and sweat dripped down his back. The crown on his head felt heavy on top of it all. An item that was "on the house for the birthday boy." The girl had taken a liking to pressing the buttons on the crown, making it glow up with bright lights.

Right, the girl. He didn't want to ruin her life-long dream. But so far, reality wasn't entirely matching with his fantasy of an amusement park. Wasn't this supposed to be paradise? It was more like a sweltering hellscape.

Zayne seemed worse for wear. He walked stiffly, shoulders up to his ears. He had a sort of stunned expression on his face, and flinched whenever they got a bit too close to someone. What was his deal?

"You don't like rides as much as games?" Caleb drawled.

"It's... an experience," Zayne forced out. "And I wouldn't say I'm too fond of it so far."

A screaming child punctuated his sentence. Zayne's eye twitched.

"Well, Pip-squeak is too small to ride most of them anyways," Caleb said casually. "So I'm not riding them either. Wouldn't be fun if I was the only one."

"I'm not small! It's just delayed growth!" the girl stuck her tongue out at him. "Besides, it's your birthday! Don't let us hold you back. I'll do something else with Zayne while you go on rides."

"Wait—"

But they were already gone, blending in with the crowd. Just a second ago, Zayne had looked out of place. Now, he couldn't tell them apart.

Caleb's fingers flexed, empty.

Earlier, when the girl had led Zayne into her room, locking Caleb out, he didn't know how to feel. She was his "little sister." Naturally he should feel disgruntled. If he wasn't allowed the privilege of going into her room because his gender and age made it "inappropriate," then the same should apply to Zayne. After all, compared to Caleb, Zayne was a stranger, which should have made it worse. But unlike Zayne, who at the end of the day was just a normal boy from the neighborhood, Caleb was her brother, and somehow that relationship made his entry more inappropriate. So really, did Caleb have the right to be upset, when he could just sneak into her room whenever he wanted to see what she was hiding? It wasn't like her door was closed all the time. She couldn't lock the room when she was away.

That wasn't what made him confused, though. What made Caleb confused was that he felt bothered by Zayne's refusal to play with him. Which didn't make any sense. Why had that irked him so much? Why would he even want to do anything with Zayne? He used to want him gone, not by his side. Since when did these complicated feelings start? He had only wanted to get close to him so he wouldn't be around her much. But as he was abandoned by both of them, he could no longer decide... was he jealous of Zayne, or the girl?

No. The issue was that they were supposed to be celebrating his birthday together. This had even been their idea, not his. So why were they going off without him on his birthday? Was he really that awful to be around?

"How about we get a balloon?" Josephine suggested. "They have some over there. All birthdays involve balloons."

Josephine grabbed an orange balloon from the stand. Wrapping it around Caleb's wrist, his heart skipped a beat.

"Get off me! I don't want to be locked up again! Don't make me go back there!"

Caleb stared at his hand. Not one of his best moments, a day where he had been peculiarly feeling rebellious. He shouldn't have lost his cool like that. That was a time where she only had him to rely on, and if he couldn't put on his tough guy act, then she would have no one to lean on. She would see that he was just a useless child who couldn't do anything to save her. But he had been vulnerable, and for once, he wanted to fight and scream and cry and kick. Because life wasn't fair, and he hadn't wanted to accept that fact. It was the first time someone had ever left him, never to come back, and he didn't want to be alone again. Now he was spending the rest of his days compensating for that loss.

He rubbed the strand. The balloon was weightless. It shouldn't have felt like such a burden.

Josephine grabbed his hand, and they began a slow walk around the park. It wasn't that Caleb wanted to hold hands with someone like Josephine, but more that he had no choice, was all. He absolutely wasn't feeling lonely, and even if he was, there was no way Josephine could fill that void for him.

Caleb stopped. The clinks of metal and copper capturing his attention as coins flipped in the air and plunked into water.

"That's a wishing fountain," Josephine explained. "You make a wish on a coin and toss it into the water."

"Sounds dull," Caleb enunciated. He never believed in wishes. But he walked towards it anyway, picking up a coin someone had left behind on the ground. He turned it over in his hands, the light blinding him as it reflected the sun.

I don't want to be on my own.

So let us remain together forever.

Closing his eyes, he flicked the coin, hearing the splash.

When he opened his eyes again, a harsh wind blew at his back, wiping away the tears that had been leaking from his pores since he arrived at the park. But the wind was also taking something away from him, as the strand on his wrist fled down his hand, past his fingers. His hand reached out, his fingers brushing the strands before it could fully escape.

Caleb gasped, the balloon slipping from his grip. He planted his feet on the ground and yanked it back, but it was already too far gone, snapping from his fingers. The air twisted around him as he forced it back with his Evol, but he could feel the balloon fighting against his current, too light to get a strong hold. The harder he pressed, the more narrow the balloon got, squeezed by the sides. He heard a low and steady whistle, the sound of a rubber band losing its threads. Caleb's eyes widened. But before he could let go of his Evol, a deafening pop exploded in his ears, and the balloon deflated, sagging to the ground.

"My balloon..."

"Oh my," Josephine's voice came from beside him. "That's a shame."

"Why..." Caleb croaked, his throat burning. Licking his lips, he swallowed and tried again. "Why did it pop?"

"Balloons don't mix well with air pressure," Josephine said, picking up the pieces. "They are delicate things."

Caleb sucked in a breath. "But... balloons can't be fixed."

"No, but we can always get another."

Why did it leave? Why won't it come back? Because you were too harsh with it. Those who are captured will only always long to be free. After all, we all have one life, and no one wishes to lose it.

So was it he who was captured, or the balloon?

"No. It's not special anymore if I get another. There can only be the one."

He didn't want to replace anyone, anymore than he wanted to be replaced. All lives were precious things.

"Caleb!" a hand pulled him from the darkness, and when he turned his gaze, it was full of her. She came back to him. She didn't leave him behind. "Zayne and I are going to some stalls. Come with us!"

"Yeah," Caleb smiled back at her. "Okay."

He had already forgotten about the balloon.

As the girl dragged them stall to stall, swaying their hands between them, Zayne kept giving Caleb glances.

Caleb had enough. "What?"

"Are you actually having fun? You look..." Zayne could only gesture at him, an arch to his eyebrows.

Caleb inhaled, straightening his face, wiping it clear of any discrepancies. He forced out a grin. "Yeah, I'm having the best time. Can't you tell?"

"Oh," Zayne blinked. "Okay then. For a second, I thought—"

"Why, you want someone to share your misery?" Caleb nudged him. "I bet you didn't even ride on the kiddie stuff because of all the germs, knowing you. That must be why she came back so soon."

"...Perhaps," Zayne smiled in resignation. "I think I've learned amusement parks aren't my thing. I prefer something quiet and simple."

That wasn't something the two of them could provide. It was always rowdy with them around. But Caleb had thought Zayne was finally warming up to that idea. Of course, why would he bother hanging around them so often if he truly couldn't stand them? But maybe they were too much for him to handle, after all.

"Quiet? You might as well as go to the aquarium," Caleb waved.

"Aquarium?" Zayne said thoughtfully. "That's a good idea. We should do that next."

We?

"That's not what I—"

"Zayne! Gege! Look!" the girl skipped over to them, two fluffy piles of pink and blue in her hands.

"What is that?" Zayne peered curiously.

"Candy floss!" she shook one towards him. "Want to try it?"

Zayne scrunched up his nose. "Floss? That doesn't look like floss at all. Who would name a type of candy after floss? That's an oxymoron."

The girl pouted. "Zayne is being weird again."

"Well, it's also called cotton candy," Caleb grabbed a handful and stuffed it into his mouth. He smacked his lips. "Could use more sour. This is just nothing but sugar."

Zayne immediately grabbed a handful of his own. He licked it, the sugar melting in his mouth, the sweetness of strawberry and raspberry coating his tongue. He licked it again. So soft. His shoulders relaxed, the first time since coming to the park. "Yes, cotton candy is suitable."

A seagull squawked above them, perching on one of the tent poles.

Caleb took another bite of the cotton candy as he stared at the Saundersilarus saundersi, the gulls native to East Asia.

"That sounds like you, Pip-squeak," Caleb said.

"As if! Would you even still like me if I was a seagull?"

A silly question. Caleb's favorite shows on TV would always remain the DAA news and that bird fossil series on Discovery. After all, there was no animal he liked better than the last remaining dinosaurs of this world. A species that could outlast catastrophe and was the inspiration of human flight, how could he not be interested? It was something to be studied. The knowledge was useful.

"Of course. You'd be an adorable seagull. We can all be seagulls, if that makes you feel better. We can fly away together."

"Why would I want to be a seagull?" Zayne frowned.

"You have no choice. You're stuck with us now," Caleb wrapped his arm around his shoulders.

"Oh! A photo booth! I always wanted to do this," the girl intercepted, already dragging them to their next adventure.

They slid into the booth, the curtain flapping around them and giving them privacy. They sat shoulder to shoulder, cramped inside the blue box. The three of them faced off a black beady eye that searched through their souls. Shoving each other around, fighting over who got to press the button first, Zayne broke through the tumble to slip a spare dollar into the slot. With the firm click, the trio scrambled to get into perfect posture for the OTTO camera.

Snap. Snap. Snap.

The curtain rustled once more with a light giggle, and the three hopped out one after the other, each with a strip of film in their hand.

Caleb stared at the column of three photos in his hand. It wasn't perfect. His crown had gotten lopsided, and he was mid-headlock with Zayne in one of them, but their smiles were big, and his eyes rippled as brightly as the last gleam of sunlight before it fell down into the night. He folded it neatly into his pocket.

"Now we'll remember this day forever!" the girl squealed, throwing her hands around Caleb and Zayne, just like she had done in one of the photos. "I can't wait to show Grandma! We should make this a tradition every birthday, Gege!"

Caleb looked away, trying to twist himself out of her grip. "Yeah."

Zayne's eyes locked onto some other stalls in the distance. "Should we go over there?"

"Those are gaming booths," Caleb said, finally unwrapping the girl's hand from his neck.

"Oh, I forgot. We got worried about you being on your own, so we came back without going on any rides," the girl tapped her chin. "Should we do some games instead?"

As they approached the booths, Caleb's frown deepened. "I can't do any of these."

"Hm? But I'm sure you'd do good at the shooter ones," the girl tilted her head.

"It's precise shooting," Zayne said, leaning forward. "While Caleb has exceptional marksmanship... he would still need to pinpoint the accurate target to find the prize."

Understanding dawned on the girl. She gave Caleb a pitying look. "You always sucked at spotting the difference."

Caleb's eye twitched. "Thank you so much for your words of encouragement, Pip-squeak. I'll be sure to remember that next time when you're still too short to ride the roller coasters."

The girl gaped at him. "That's so not fair!"

"Well, let's not leave empty handed," Zayne scanned their surroundings. "There's got to be something we can at least all do together."

"The merry-go-round?" the girl suggested. "I've always wanted to ride it."

The one that went up and down and all around? A motion nightmare. Zayne shuddered. "Anything but that."

The girl sulked. "You're not making this any easy, Zayne."

Yes, he was the problem. He didn't fit in anywhere. Zayne hung his head.

"We would have to be separated if we did the merry-go-round anyways," Caleb said, swinging his gaze to him. His eye caught on something up high. "How about that?"

"The Ferris Wheel?" the girl gasped. "It's true. I never would've thought of that before. And the fireworks should be starting soon, so we can watch it from there!"

Zayne blinked, the color draining from his face. "I don't know..."

"Come on," Caleb grabbed his hand. "We're not gonna get anywhere if you're gonna disapprove of everything. Get out of your comfort zone a little."

Zayne bit his lip. "I suppose."

"Aren't you going to have any regrets?" Caleb gazed at him. "You haven't been doing much."

"I never have regrets," Zayne said stiffly. "Every decision I make is carefully planned for that purpose. And why would I have anything to regret, when we have all the time in the world to just go another day and do the things we couldn't do before then? It also wouldn't be fun if we did everything today. At least this way, we still have something to look forward to. Don't you think?"

"Is this a promise to go again? You sure about that?" Caleb squeezed his hand.

Zayne winced. "Perhaps when it's night? It's less crowded at night. More quiet."

A half-hearted compromise. That's what he thought. Caleb laughed. "Don't make promises you can't keep. Don't worry about it if you don't like amusement parks. It's more than enough that me and her finally got to see a real one. You didn't even know we were going today. If anything, we dragged you here. It's not any different from a kidnapping. You didn't have to come. So... thanks for that, I guess."

Zayne wasn't able to say anything to that—they had arrived to the line, and their turn was already next, the compartment swaying and creaking in greeting.

The three of them clambered into the compartment, the floor wobbling under their weight. Caleb and the girl sat on either side of Zayne, who was stiff as a rod, his face pale.

"Don't be scared, Zayne!" the girl held onto his hand. "You got me!"

"That's not as reassuring as you think it is."

"What's that supposed to mean?" the girl squeezed his fingers, her eyes glinting dangerously.

The compartment lurched upward, slowly ascending into the air.

"Wow," the girl muttered, her hand falling away from his as she leaned forward, her gaze fixed on the sky before them. Caleb followed after her. Now this was finally something worth seeing.

As they reached closer to the top, the compartment stilled. They were surrounded by a sea of stars that were shot at by cannonballs of color, sparks raining down over their boat.

"Someone once told me that I used to be a star. I fell down to Earth, and that's how I met Caleb and Grandma," the girl extended her hand out the window, as if she could grasp onto a star. "Maybe we'll go back to the stars when our time on Earth is up."

Zayne scrunched his nose. "I thought we were seagulls. Now we're stars?"

"We can be anything we want to be. Do you think that's too childish?" she tilted her head up at him. Zayne gazed down at her, his lips parting. Their fingers were inches apart, just near to grazing each other, and Zayne seemed to be twitching.

"...No. Not at all. I find that stars are more pleasing than seagulls."

Caleb frowned. But if she went back to the stars, what about him? Stars were years apart. They'd never be able to be together again. No. He wouldn't let that happen. She wasn't going back to the sky without him again. And he didn't want damn Zayne going off with her, either. Why couldn't they just stay here?

His gaze locked onto the sky in front of him. He loved the sky. But dark like this, it felt ominous. Still, he supposed the subtle twinkling in the middle of the darkness was a sight to behold.

"Well, here we are now. It's no Cloudia Island or anything like our dreams, but it's as close to our paradise as we're going to get in these forms," Caleb stretched his arms behind his head. He turned to the girl, sliding his hand over the top of her hair. "You better really soak in this view. This will probably be the tallest you'll ever get, Pip-squeak."

The girl smacked his hand away.

"I'm sure she'll get tall enough eventually," Zayne said sagely.

"Thank you, Zayne! At least someone gets me," the girl snuggled up to Zayne's side, much to his flustered face, and glared at Caleb.

Caleb huffed. "Yeah, right. The day she grows taller than either of us is the day hell will freeze over. And neither is likely because there is no way Zayne is going to hell."

Zayne furrowed his brow. "Thanks for the compliment, I think."

The compartment shook again, and the carriage filled with silence as they descended back to the ground.

Shuffling along with the crowd, Josephine waited for them up ahead, waving her phone at them.

"I texted her," Zayne said, upon seeing Caleb's flat expression. "Should I not have done that?"

Caleb stared ahead. "Whatever."

As they got closer to Josephine, a parade of mascots marched nearby, dancing with holograms that flickered between them. They seemed to tell a story of an island adventure.

Zayne leaned toward Caleb, whispering, "We still got Cloudia Island. We'll aim as close as we can and settle for nothing less. That way, we won't have any regrets."

The mascots gathered around as the holograms turned vicious, dashing through them with swords. The mascots scurried and twirled, then began to fight back, defeating their captors as they emerged victorious warriors.

The girl stumbled forward, her eyes widening at one of the mascots, but Zayne pulled her back and continued to push her in the opposite direction, towards Josephine. Probably so she wouldn't get lost, but Caleb didn't miss the blush to his ears and the deeper furrow of his brow, the ticking of his jaw.

Spending so much time together must be rubbing him off on Zayne. A flutter twisted in Caleb's stomach. He cleared his throat, ignoring the weird sensation that overcame him, almost as if he was... giddy over that fact. Because that would be ridiculous. Why share so much joy in feeling the same intensity about a certain person, even more so the idea that it was Caleb's doing that made him develop a jealous streak? What jealousy even was there to be had?

Shaking his head, he strided past them. As Caleb was knocked by the crowd, he spotted a much smaller child on the ground, their hands shielding their head as everyone else rushed past them.

Caleb watched the scene blankly, his body roughly pushed back and forth like a ping pong ball in a machine. When the child's cries and sniffles reached his ears, Caleb stepped forward—

And walked right past the child, his face unchanging.

"Caleb!" the girl scolded, clinging onto him as she yanked him back.

"What?" Caleb called over his shoulder. "Gran is waiting."

"But you can't just leave the child like that! It's not right!"

"So? What do you want me to do?" Caleb snatched his arm back from her. "We have to worry about ourselves."

"How can you say that? Zayne, talk sense into Caleb!"

Zayne's eyes widened. Looking sheepishly at Caleb, he scratched his head. "It would be the right thing to do, ethically speaking. But efficiently speaking..."

"See? Even Zayne doesn't get it," Caleb shrugged. "Just leave it to the adults."

"But you're a good person, Caleb!" the girl grabbed his shoulders. "And walking away from that is just wrong! I want everyone to see just how amazing my big brother is!"

Caleb stiffened. His eye twitched as the girl continued to shake him, looking at him with those droopy eyes. She shoved her face closer to him, too close, so close he could see his reflection in her gaze. Those bright eyes wavered in front of him, flickering with light that broke through the colors, like a shattering mirror. Was it fear? Disgust? He couldn't look any longer. He didn't want to see that in her gaze. Not her. A second longer, and she would see right through his careful act. Averting his gaze and shutting his eyes, he pushed her away.

Seriously. What could he possibly do that no one else could do? Why did it have to be him?

Glancing at the child once more, Caleb saw someone trip from not too far away. The body tipped down, aiming straight for the child in slow motion. Before he could even think, Caleb waved his hand. The body froze, and Caleb trudged towards the child, even though he said he wouldn't. With a tsk, he threw the wannabe assailant a scathing look as they glanced around their surroundings with bafflement. With a sheepish apology, they ran away. Before anyone else could stomp on him or the child, Caleb compressed the air around them, creating a barrier.

"Hey," Caleb spoke, crossing his arms. "What happened to you? Don't you know sitting here like a duck is only going to put you in harm's way?"

The child stopped sniffling, looking up at Caleb.

"Uh..." Caleb rubbed his neck. He really wasn't good at this. He only knew how to talk to the girl, and even then, he was pretty sure she only paid his behavior no mind to see whatever it was she wanted to see instead. He tried to recall all those lessons Josephine gave him. "What I mean is... do you know where your parents are?"

The child shook his head.

This wasn't getting them anywhere. Caleb sighed.

"Hop on," Caleb gestured to his back. "I'll lift you up. See if you can point them out. If not, we'll head straight to the nearest security officer. Okay?"

Lifting the child up, Caleb maneuvered through the endless crowd with the help of his Evol, preventing anyone from getting too close. Then, using his Evol to slightly levitate the child higher above the crowd, they found an exit.

It was a coincidence, or perhaps luck, that the parents were by the nearest security officer. Caleb handed the child over to them, and unable to fully reject the parents' gratitude, he came back with three pieces of candy, free of charge.

He stared at the candy as the girl came over to him, praising his heroics. But he wasn't paying attention to her.

Did he... like being good?

Caleb didn't think he could ever feel satisfaction from performing deeds. He was always the center of attention, but that stemmed from cruelty and control. Constant victory was born out of a need to survive, not as a selfish past time. But Caleb had to admit, there was a certain thrill whenever he received positive attention instead of negative attention, whenever he completed a task thought by everyone else to be impossible. It was rare, and uncomfortable, since he never received heartfelt praise before. Praise that didn't commend the destruction he wrought. Cheers and unwanted hugs from the team whenever he successfully scored a basket, neighborhood boys begging for his time as they looked at him with awe instead of fear or cruel intent. Relieved smiles the family gave him for saving their child.

All he had to do was solve problems, problems with solutions that came naturally to him, and people acted like he was on top of the world.

It made Caleb realize maybe a life where he wasn't alone, where people wanted him for who he was without dissecting his worth and gains, who willingly sought him out as a reliable guy that could fix all their problems, and didn't see him as some entity who could easily destroy the world if given the proper training... could exist. This life had been denied to him, but yet, was so close within his reach.

Caleb wanted to be a hero. Not just because she wanted him to be a hero. But because for once, he genuinely wished he could do something useful that wasn't harmful to others. Because he was greedy, seeking attention he never got before, projecting his self onto others like him, desperate for connection to this world, and he wanted proof that he was who the girl believed him to be.

His heart twisted in his chest. This was a side of him he had already thought long dead. He should have done a more thorough job at killing it off if he wanted to remain hidden. Could he really help others, when his future was already set for him?

Zayne gave him a knowing look.

"...You actually like helping others. That's why you're always taking in strays. I've noticed."

Did he mean the kitten, or the dog? But those couldn't count as "taking them in." The girl claimed Caleb had a certain way of animals, but Caleb's experience with animals would say otherwise. The first "pet" he ever had was killed. So he thought the way he cared for it had been the issue. He kept a tighter leash on the kitten, but that only made the kitten long to run away, always scrambling from his grasp with a hiss. The dog was left to his own devices, coming and going as he pleased, and when he came, it was because of food and head scratches. An instinct, not by choice. Dogs were always the easiest to win over, especially when you dangled affection in front of one who had been long abandoned. He knew that better than anyone else. But Caleb only indulged the dog because it impressed the girl that he was some kind of "dog whisperer." Not because he actually cared for the dog himself. With time, he was sure the dog would leave him as well, seeing that his visits were sparse to begin with, and the dog was getting bigger—practically the size of a wolf. He would have other business eventually. A new family to worry about.

Still, Caleb had gotten more used to it. The dog would often sniff his right arm and seemed oddly fascinated by technology and engineering as much as Caleb was, always watching him with intensity as Caleb showed him how to put together model kits, occasionally sometimes bringing spare metal parts as offerings, but beyond that, the dog still snarled and growled and huffed. Caleb had a conspiracy that the dog only came because of the girl, and only tolerated Caleb as an extension of that—or perhaps he was keeping watch, guarding the girl from what he assumed was predators after his pack. Just like how Caleb only hogged the dog to protect her from any surprise attacks. Yes, Caleb wasn't fond of strays—they were untamed, uncivilized, unloyal. They only listened when they had a leader to follow, but Caleb never had willingly taken that role out of "just because," but simply obligation as his duty to protect the girl. It wasn't his intention to have helped others. That was just something that... happened. It couldn't be more than that.

Caleb scoffed. "No way. I just didn't want to make her sad."

She could never know the truth. That he wasn't the good person she thought he was. That was all it could be. He couldn't allow himself to have that weakness. But for how much longer must he pretend?

Zayne's eyes never left his soul, not convinced. "Still counts."

As they moved again, Caleb caught something from the corner of his eye. A man taller than the rest, his head bowed and obscured by a baseball cap. He sucked in a breath.

"You'll give us the next location, won't you? What do you think is a good spot?"

"Some place quiet. Not too crowded."

"The aquarium... or the park next to it. That's quiet enough. And the young Emissary frequents that area often."

"I've never seen him go too far away. It's not a guarantee he'll be there."

"Don't get a change of heart now. We'll meet again soon."

Caleb lowered his head. There was no way he could be a hero. Not when he had just sent them all to their doom for his own self-preservation.

Was there any way out of this?

He had to make sure the aquarium never happened. But he knew Zayne. Zayne would never have the courage to invite her out himself. They were just joking around, saying meaningless things in passing. It should be safe. Right?

He'd protect them. This was all for them. They'd understand.

He clenched his fists. From beside him, one of the mascots fell, betrayed by his own kind.

"Hey, Zayne," Caleb asked. "What do you think of sad endings?"

"Sad endings? Why, are you sad?" Zayne blinked. Then said thoughtfully, "It's okay to be sad. But... I don't like them. I rather avoid tragedies. Don't you think the same? So let's just have happy endings instead."

"What's this talk about sad endings?" the girl frowned. "You did a good deed. So it was a happy ending! And we'll keep having happy endings. We'll do this again and again, every year. And next time will be better because I'll be tall enough to ride! Just you wait, I'm gonna prove you wrong!"

"But Zayne doesn't like amusement parks," Caleb pointed out. "I doubt he'll want to go to one again."

"No way! I'm not letting Zayne get out of this one, either!"

"Well, if it's with you, I can make an exception. I'll never improve if I don't test myself," Zayne lowered his head. "It wouldn't hurt you to be more honest. Don't feel bad about enjoying yourself. It's your birthday."

Caleb froze. How did he know? But of course he'd know. It was Zayne. A chuckle escaped from him in disbelief.

"Kids! Smile at the camera!" Josephine called, finally reaching their destination. "I'll get the mascots in the background."

Zayne and Caleb glanced at each other. There were still many things left unsaid, but they forced smiles on their faces as always as they pretended everything was alright. Zayne really was becoming a pro at this.

After the camera flashed, Caleb yanked Zayne towards him, twisting his wrist in his grip. "Then that's a promise you must keep. You better still be here next year."

Zayne's expression wavered.

"Caleb! Zayne! Get over here!" the girl yelled.

Turning away from Zayne, Caleb threw a smile towards the girl, sashaying her way and bending down to peer at Josephine's phone, his eyes softening. "Nice shot."

"Then maybe we should take photos every year for your birthday," Josephine said. "Every memory counts."

Did it really?

Then why did it feel like he was about to lose everything, just like that deflated balloon he couldn't save?

*****

"Happy birthday to you!"

Voices rang out in the yard as Caleb blew out the candles of his birthday cake. The camera flashed in his face, just like it did every year.

"Thanks for the cake, Ms. Zhang!" a boy cheered, followed by rambunctious laughter. Friends. Caleb finally had some he could call his own. He never thought he would, after Zayne. But at some point, he had attracted a crowd who wouldn't leave him alone, worming their way into his life, and they just stuck.

It was painfully obvious to him he wasn't meant to have a life like this, yet somehow, he had managed to create one for himself. It felt too good to be true, but things have been going so smoothly, and Caleb hoped that maybe he could hold onto all of this for once, until his final breath. So he kept them around, even though a part of him screamed that he was being foolish for minding temporary things. But he told himself it was okay. Because even with friends surrounding him, there was always still just one person he cared about more than anybody else.

"Happy birthday, Gege!" the girl ran into his arms. "Hope your wish comes true!"

"It will, now that you're here," Caleb smiled at her.

"Ooo," the boys echoed. But Caleb could no longer see them. All he could see was her.

"No matter what we do to get her away from Caleb, she keeps coming back," another boy shook his head. "They truly are inseparable for a pair of siblings, don't you think?"

"That's simple. It's because no one will take her away from me again, no matter how hard they try," Caleb said, his eyes never leaving hers. "Just like gravity."

As the party faded out, Caleb and the girl approached Josephine. In her hands was a thick red book, filled with paper covered in plastic. She was arranging a group of photos she had taken into the book.

Caleb peered over her work. The page next to the one she was arranging were a few older photos. Photos he never thought he'd see again.

Something cracked inside of him. He had tried so hard to replace that crack, but once it cracked once, it was bound to crack again. No matter what you did to patch it up, it would never be the same. He couldn't lie to himself. Even with this new life he had, and with her by her side, there was stil a profound void, an emptiness he couldn't shake, and now it was back with a vengeance.

Because even with all the people there, there was one person he still had longed to see. And each year, that antcipation was disappointed, again and again, until no hope was left.

"Why do you still have that?" Caleb asked, pointing.

"Hm? These?" Josephine held the book straighter so he could see better. A pair of sharp hazel-green eyes stared back at him from behind rectangle glasses. It was almost mocking, seeing a photo when the man hadn't been present. He had left traces of himself all over the house, yet he could never show his face. As if he had forgotten all about them. "Don't you think it's a good idea to still remember him? Dr. Fang is still our family doctor, and the Lis have been sending you gifts every year."

Caleb scowled. "The Lis. Not himself."

"Gege..." the girl rubbed his back. "It's been years. Zayne is probably just busy. He's been accomplishing a lot. I'm sure he'll contact us again one day."

How could she have forgiven him so easily already, when she had cried her eyes out when he moved? Things were finally peaceful. If he came back, Caleb just knew that everything he had sacrificed in the past would come back to bite him. No. He couldn't let Zayne near them, where he would destroy this happiness, make her sad just like he did before. Caleb gritted his teeth. "Yeah, if I ever see him again..."

But for his first semester of medical school, he was required to take a communications and ethics class. His professor seemed intent on assigning narrative essays every week to judge the students' personal mental health and bedside manner. The subjects ranged from world views to ethical values. And Zayne just... wasn't getting it.

It wasn't that Zayne didn't understand right from wrong. The issue was that Zayne didn't know how to express himself.

In the past, when Zayne had to write opinionated essays during his primary and secondary education, the scores were based on how "right" he was and how well he provided evidence rather than how much he actually felt about the subject. He got the best grade every time because of his objective writing skills and reputation as a child genius. His teachers may have brought up the concern of his ever absent personal voice to his parents once or twice, but it wasn't something anyone dwelled on. And that had been what his planners were for, to experience the world through "normal people's" eyes.

But this was his first time not receiving an A on an assignment. His professor had given him a low grade for "lacking emotion."

He was so frustrated, that when he looked up from his breath of fresh air, he found himself in front of his parents' doorstep. Zayne lived in the dorms, so he never had any reason to come home since classes started. His parents were also hardly ever home, now that they were back into the swing of things and working abroad again, their true calling that they couldn't deny forever. At this point, "home" was just a formality—a place to own just for the sake of it. But Zayne remembered that his parents were home this week for a brief vacation, and Zayne just... needed to talk to someone. Anyone.

He had no one to talk to anymore.

It felt like he reverted back to the boy he was before he met them. The boy who only knew indifference. The boy who couldn't smile properly. It made him doubt everything. Maybe when he was around them, he started to develop a sense of humanity, but he was forgetting what that was like, the longer they were apart.

What Zayne did know was that if Caleb was here, he'd be making fun of him until no end, calling him out for pointing out psychological shortcomings of others when Zayne had a bunch of his own to deal with. So maybe Caleb wouldn't have been of much help, even if he were here. But at least Caleb would've told him to snap out of it. And the girl probably would've told him to look inside himself more, in her typical vague fashion that often left Zayne confused with more questions than answers.

Zayne had no peers to rely on back at campus for advice, either. Most students were already fully developed emotional adults and well under way on their path to success. Zayne was the only one his age in all his classes, the youngest—and the shortest. Students either looked at him in contempt or treated him with too much care. He just wanted someone to treat him normally. And Dr. Fang, the only one who did so on school grounds, wasn't available—he had become busier than ever since balancing Akso and Skyhaven, and right now he was at the former. That left his parents as the only option he had—even though he had always tried his best to never bother them with school worries, and Zayne felt like he was thrown several years back in time, reduced to a five year old unwilling to let go of his guardian's hand.

Zayne had wrapped his fingers around the knob when the door swung open, and he was greeted by his father.

"Xiao Shen?" his father blinked, rubbing his eyes. "Is that really you?"

Zayne grimaced, retracting his hand as he cleared his throat. "Yes. It's me."

"Xiao Shen?" a voice shouted from the back. Footsteps thudded closer until the view of his mother appeared behind his father, her hand cupping her cheek. "This is an unexpected surprise."

"Is it a bad time? I can come back later..."

"No, no!" his father reached out, grabbing his wrist before he could turn away. "It's never a bad time for you, Shen. This home is still yours too, you know."

"It's just you don't usually stop by, and we don't want to bother you while you're studying. We were in your shoes before, so we know how hard medical school can be," his mother laughed, beckoning him. "I've just made dinner. Come inside and eat."

Zayne stepped across the threshold, the door closing behind him.

"So what brings you here?" his father asked him.

"I..." Zayne turned his gaze, inspecting each familiar piece of furniture in the unfamiliar living room, adjusting his collar. "I was feeling homesick."

His mother spun around, hands on her hips. "Li Shen, I know when you're hiding something. Spit it out. Are you in trouble?"

"Our Shen? In trouble? Impossible," his father shook his head. But he bit his lip, his eyes trembling. "Although... maybe he was kicked out by his roommate because of his personality. He is constantly misunderstood."

"That's not it either," Zayne sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I got a D."

Their jaws dropped. Zayne's mother leaned forward, brow furrowing as she placed a hand on his forehead and squinted her eyes. "Are you feeling okay, Xiao Shen?"

He gently pushed her hand away. "Mom, my vitals are fine, the last time I checked. It was just a narrative essay. We have to write about how we feel towards life and death. Personal values. And my professor said my essay lacked emotion. But... I don't understand what feelings have to do with results. Aren't doctors supposed to remain unbiased?"

His parents looked at each other.

"Well, that's alright," his mother said, clasping their hands together. "It was your only D, right? I'm sure you're doing good otherwise. You've always been so digilent. Don't let one strict professor get you down."

Zayne averted his gaze. "Um, that wasn't my only D."

"What was that?" his mother asked, her eye twitching. His father rubbed her arm.

"I'm failing the class," Zayne said, louder this time. "The whole class is about bedside etiquette. Something about making sure we turn out more doctors with empathy. It's an introductory course. And I haven't gotten a single good grade."

She blew out a breath, placing a hand over her chest. "Okay. Let's eat first. I need to sit down."

As they all ate around the table, his mother put down her chopsticks. "So... you're struggling with a class. But usually you can handle it on your own. You've never went to us for anything."

"There's a first for everything," his father pointed out. "Like getting a bad grade. It was bound to happen eventually."

His mother nodded. "Yes, it's more strange that it took you this long to fail. It's part of the natural learning process. Still, I never thought we'd live to see the day when we can actually help our son with his homework."

"I didn't know who else to go to," Zayne mumbled, fiddling with his food.

"Have you tried anything on your own yet?" his mother stroke her chin. "Don't you still have the planners you've been using since fifth grade? Those are supposed to help you with getting out more."

"I don't have much time to go anywhere," Zayne shook his head. "Much less have anyone to go with."

"Have you tried writing about the time you spent with that girl?" his father asked. "We thought you were finally taking medical studies seriously because of her."

"I guess showing concern for one person is not good enough," Zayne frowned. "And it's hard for me to use her for every situation."

"Hm," his mother looked down at her plate. "It's not a clear cut answer we can just give to you. What's your next essay about? We can help you from there."

"It's about the use of nature in easing one's mind," Zayne explained. "But nature is ruthless and has a shorter lifespan than humans. So I don't see how that can be easing. Much less beautiful."

There was a time where Zayne thought he appreciated nature. But he now knew nature couldn't last. Flowers only reminded him of the day he moved, and the day he moved wasn't a happy one. So how could nature be happy? If all of it was destined to die, then... what was the point of living?

He was back to not understanding anything. It was like he had learned nothing last year, having forgotten what it felt to feel. He didn't regret leaving Linkon behind. Would he make the same choice, if given the option to repeat? Yes. He would in a heartbeat, again and again. So why was he so stressed? He had never felt so... riled before. That was always more Caleb's thing. And the girl had been the one to struggle most in academics.

Zayne pushed his plate away, losing his appetite.

"Shen, you're so great at analyzing situations from an objective point of view. I don't know anyone else who can pinpoint diagnoses off the top of their head, who practices every day to memorize anatomical and medicinal terms like it's their Bible," his mother grabbed his hand, rubbing his knuckles. "But that's not all there is to medicine. Sometimes, you have to think outside the box. Symptoms can overlap, or hide from you, and the diagnosis you give based on only the surface can be wrong. But there are some things you can never understand until you experience them yourself. If the reason why you are struggling is because you are no longer close to the things that used to bring you joy... maybe the solution is for you to return to the place of your memories."

Zayne wrinkled his nose. "You want me to go back to Linkon? But I have class again tomorrow."

"Well, you can either follow the rules to the book as you always have, but you'll never fix your problem and continue to get bad grades, or you can take a detour to sort out your problem, at the slight risk of being behind, but at least when you come back, you'll be smarter than before."

Zayne stiffened. No matter the choice, he'd be making a mistake. But which one was the worst mistake?

Somehow, some minutes to an hour later, Zayne stood outside his door, all bundled up.

"Mom... I thought we grew passed this," Zayne groaned, waddling his way down the steps.

"You haven't been dressing well enough for the weather," his mother said, adjusting his hat, pulling it down over his face. "It's the least I can do as your mother."

"And you haven't been calling us since you started school," his father scolded. "What are we, chopped liver? You wouldn't have even visited us if you weren't struggling. You don't need a reason to come over. Let's keep in touch more, Xiao Shen. We miss you."

Miss me? Zayne frowned. Hearing that phrase, it felt like something was on the tip of his tongue, the answer to his issue.

But his mother was thrusting a bag of candy into his hand, and Zayne forgot it all.

"Take this candy to pass out to the children at the hospital when you arrive. Pick out your favorites if you don't want anybody else getting to them before you."

Zayne's lips twitched upward. "You know I don't have any favorites. I like them all the same. It doesn't matter to me."

No amount of sweetness could be as good as...

"Well, even if you have no preferences..." his mother bent down, kissing his forehead. "You'll always be our favorite, Xiao Shen. Remember that."

Zayne squeezed the bag of candy, clutching it to his chest. "Okay."

"Don't get lost now, and follow the map!" his mother called, waving at him. "Take care!"

Zayne blew out a breath, his steps taking him further and further away from his house. His pocket was heavy and warm against his side, carrying the map filled with doodles. His mother had somehow talked him into going to Linkon after all, and since Zayne had never gone to Linkon from Skyhaven yet, his mother helped him sketch out a travel plan so he wouldn't get lost.

He still had a chance to decline. He could easily just turn his back and return to the dorms. He didn't have to go to Linkon. But the weight in his pocket was too heavy to ignore, and the warmth was practically burning. So even when presented with the opportunity to refuse, somehow, an answer he wouldn't be able to figure out for years to come, he still made the choice to divert from his usual path.

Zayne fiddled with his coat, bringing the collar up to his face, covering his mouth. At least no one could recognize him like this.

The excuse he gave himself was that he simply wanted to see Dr. Fang again. The last time he saw the graying, friendly doctor had been at the university's opening ceremony, when he was officially inducted into the medical school. Dr. Fang had immediately greeted him afterwards and was quick to introduce him to his colleagues. The dean even personally welcomed him, carrying high hopes for the child genius that Dr. Fang never shut up about. Zayne made sure to keep track of every important connection. It was crucial for his infiltration plan to succeed. But Zayne never had any time to properly discuss or show gratitude to his mentor, and since medical school required him to master a series of general courses rather than one specific field, he hadn't been able to make much progress on his personal research pursuits regarding cardiology. Zayne didn't want to wait eight years until graduation to finally dive into his life goal.

When Zayne sat down in the train, all the exhaustion from the day overcame him. It felt like his nightmares had only gotten worse, and Zayne was starting to suspect that he was developing insomnia. As the scenery swooshed by him like a lullaby, the train gently rocking side to side, his eyes drooped, and he thought, what could be the harm of falling asleep?

*****

"...Station. This is Osmanthus Grove Station. Please make sure to take all your belongings with you and exit in an orderly fashion."

Zayne gasped, jolting awake. Familiar lyrics looped in his ear—the song he always listened to whenever he was struggling. The messy beat and angry words resonated with all the chaotic feelings inside him, washing it away with overwhelming power.

He jumped to the window, his earbuds falling out his ears, dangling off his neck as all sound abruptly ended. His hands pressed on the glass. There were no buildings, no heavy crowds. Outside was an empty field filled with orange, only a row of osmanthus trees in sight.

This... wasn't the usual station. Did he miss his stop?

That wasn't possible. Zayne never made such a rookie mistake. He was always focused.

"Doors closing."

Zayne's eyes widened. Biting his lip, he swept his gaze to the doors.

Before they could click together, an arm shoved itself through the gap, interfering.

"Excuse me," Zayne bowed, sliding the doors back open as he slipped past. "This is my stop."

Hopping onto the unfamiliar platform, the doors finally shut behind him, and the light rail chugged along.

He took a deep breath, inhaling the sweet air. He had no idea how he ended up here.

The sole purpose of an alarm was to wake him from slumber. But he supposed, no matter how loud or noisy a song could be, if it's the one that helped him sleep whenever he was stressed, the effects would be rendered moot. That was a blunder on his part.

His lip twitched. The song was an indirect gift from the girl. She had led him to that song, the start of endless fated connections between them. Even when she was gone, it seemed he couldn't fully rid himself of her influence, always handing him surprises and strange coincidences that changed the course of his life.

Zayne took his first step forward, fully embarking on his side quest—the voyage through the sea of yellow and apricot. The musk of dry leaves licked his skin with the soft breeze, the changing colors among the thousands of petals flickering like sequins.

In all the time he lived in while at Linkon, he never knew a place like this had existed.

There was certainly no such place in his nightmares. His nightmares were as bleak as always. He wandered the remains of a city that never greeted a sun, permanently stained by clouds. There was a single jasmine the owner maintained by his side, but that too had started to wilt and wither away. He tried his best to keep it up right, but all his efforts were in vain. The owner lived alone, his days spent in quiet, a void in which he attempted to fill by endless television, but old pictures couldn't ever replace the real thing. When he did venture outside, and finally came across another human, that human never lasted long, always destined to die by his hand... for he only contacted who he sought, and everyone he sought had a mark on them. So really, what was the point of cheering them up, when that would just delay the process? It was more merciful to just let it be. No one could save a world on the verge of collapse.

Yet, for some reason, Zayne always woke up disgruntled. As if he wasn't satisfied with that answer. But what other answer could there be? Perhaps it would be the solution to his problem.

Ever since he moved, his nightmares had gotten more vivid. He had taken to writing down the experiences in a journal. It just felt like they were always trying to tell him something. A glimpse to a parallel universe hidden within the tunnel, maybe. Perhaps it would be important later. But he also felt he was slowly growing insane, keeping all that inside of him. When Zayne wasn't obsessing over cardiology research, he was hyperfixated on dream theory and psychology studies.

As he looked up at the canopy of trees, Zayne felt like perhaps he was getting closer to that answer.

She hadn't appeared in any of the dreams. Perhaps the nightmares wanted him to forget her existence. But Zayne didn't want to forget her existence. She had become integral to his life the moment they met, whether she realized it or not. He couldn't erase the effect she had on him, the way she made him feel. Supposedly you'd never forget an encounter that had a significant impact on your life, and she was certainly a person he would remember forever, who had upended his entire world. Both of them were unlike anyone else he had ever met, and he would carry that within his heart for as long as he could.

But in the dreams without her... that's what made them truly a nightmare. There was no warmth. No bright smiles. Only despair.

Zayne clawed at his heart, scratching his jacket. A dull ache started there, deep and familiar. Delayed Gastroesophageal Reflux? There were so many different conditions and he had never been able to accurately guess the pain he always felt in his chest. Or maybe that's because he was avoiding the real cause, once again ignoring the fact that the brain could send misfires, like his mother had warned.

It was like his dreams were slowly bleeding into reality—and with it, the owner's personality. He was seeing his future. He knew he was. A future where he was destined to be alone, to never be granted the privilege of feeling. He couldn't fulfill his duty otherwise. That wasn't him, though. As composed as he always pretended to be, Zayne could feel, and suppressing them so he could regain control over himself was what was creating this irritable, stoic person he was becoming. A person who was capable of murder.

Did he ever actually had any control to begin with?

Zayne now knew without a doubt... he needed her. He needed her to be human, to save himself from becoming his own nightmare. That was why he hadn't been himself lately. It was maybe shameful to admit that he couldn't be more independent, that the thought of losing someone was enough to make him go crazy, when it was best to separate emotions from responsibility, but he missed her.

Ah. So that's what that was.

He wondered if the other version of him also missed her deep down, and if perhaps she could stop him from fully losing himself even more. If only he even had the chance to meet her, like he had. That's where their paths had diverged.

The variable.

The wind turned harsh in defiance, whipping at the trees. A shower of osmanthuses cascaded down on Zayne.

His lips parted, and a dollop of soft yellow landed on his tongue. Bitterness exploded in his mouth, unlike the sweetness one would expect from osmanthus, and he couldn't resist the urge to repel the unnatural substance from his body, spitting it out.

He trembled from the embarrassing moment, his lips wobbling. But when the last of the shower fell, an uncontrollable laugh erupted from his throat. He laughed and laughed, until his insides hurt, and he had to clutch his sides as the muscles contracted from the quick, intense bursts of air.

A light snow fall had covered the scattering petals with tiny crystals, looking like tears that mourned a parting.

It reminded him of the last time he saw Caleb, the asiatic apple blooms kissing them goodbye.

It had been a sorrowful moment, but yet, they held strong with hope.

That's what life was. The longing, the sorrow, the perseverance. What made it beautiful was how such things could still exist despite the end being near. Zayne couldn't believe he had forgotten this important fact. They had both taught him this well. He had been ignoring the bigger picture, as always.

Zayne lifted his hand, the snow fluctuating with his fingers. He had resented the harm his Evol could bring. But despite how destructive it was, she had seen it as useful. And now that he saw how well snow mixed with flowers...

It wasn't all that bad.

There was always beauty to be found within every aspect of human life. That's what made humanity so interesting. There was always something new to discover. He didn't think there would ever be a time where he would be not surprised by it.

A petal fell into the palm of his hand. He wished he could only see how it would look on the girl. As a hair piece, or a bracelet. Perhaps they should've made friendship bracelets. A sign of their commitment to each other. She would've looked lovely either way, he was sure. Did she even keep the seals he gave her, or was he holding onto a foolish dream? He should've asked Caleb. But when he met her again, he could get the answers to all these uncertainities, and it would have made the wait worth it.

He folded his fingers over the petal, holding it close to his heart.

When he had met the girl, it was forced upon by his parents. He hadn't wanted it at first. And he now knew the whole purpose of them meeting was to keep an eye on their situation and stability, their own experiment of sorts. His parents had known the risks and wanted to test it. But regardless, he came to enjoy their play dates.

Now that he was in Linkon again, she was so close... but he didn't think he could work up the nerve to see her. He would only see her again when he was ready. When there was no pretense, and it was on his own terms. It would be his own will this time. And maybe she would want to meet him out of her own will as well.

There were no mistakes. Only choices. And all choices eventually led them down the path they were truly destined for. He would keep making the choice that gave him his own happy ending. As long as their choices and desires were mutual, they were sure to be fated to meet again.

The answer finally reached his lips, through his pen as he firmly sketched his answer onto paper. A proper farewell to life, witnessed only by the wind and looming grove that protected him.

As he retraced his steps back to Akso Hospital, he included the information on the map. It would become a tradition, so he would never lose his way again.

He hated it. They would never breathe at the same pace. Another factor driving them apart. And since he was the oldest, he had all these growing responsibilities... Josephine and his teachers carried a lot of expectations for him that he couldn't stand.

Caleb was cracking under pressure. There was too much change happening at once and he didn't know how to deal with it. It wasn't just school. It was also his body. Little things. Freckles had developed over Caleb's cheeks, blemishing his skin. Evidence of his sun soaked flesh, having spent a few summers outside now. Josephine declared it a sign of good health. But in a culture that valued purity over filth, it just gave peers another reason to bully him.

Still, he didn't care. As long as she liked the spots, he couldn't care less what the others thought. Caleb paid them no mind.

But... something wasn't right. After school, Caleb walked the path to their primary school to pick the girl up from class. Josephine had recently gotten a new job at some home or whatever, for extra funds, so it was up to Caleb to take care of the girl when she was gone. But the girl had a sour look on her face and wouldn't look him in the eye, much less talk to him. Was this what they called the silent treatment? When he cooked her dinner, she snapped at him for not enough seasoning on her plate, and refused to eat the rest. She never complained about his cooking. Never. And she most certainly never refused the opportunity to eat.

But whenever Caleb asked her what was wrong, she would only call him a dummy.

Which made him realize... she still wasn't relying on him, and he was still doing a bad job at taking care of her.

The rain was frequent again this year—a reflection of their moods, mourning their heartbreak. This time last year, she had been upset for being bullied. But she adjusted to her classmates better than Caleb ever had his, already making a handful of friends. So... what was bothering her now? Was she going to be upset about something every spring? A tradition that Caleb would need to learn how to navigate?

...No. That wasn't it. He was ignoring the real issue. This attitude had been going on for much longer than just today. He knew the reason. It was the same reason why he had been particularly overwhelmed and cynical.

It hadn't been too long since... Zayne left. His absence made the past few months extremely slow.

It was more glaringly obvious with him gone that Zayne had played a crucial role in balancing them out. He had been their tether. With him missing, there was lingering resentment and no one to hold it at bay. Caleb's emotions were all over the place. He was... angry, so angry. He hated this world. He hated everyone in it. And he had nowhere else to turn, since the girl was just as emotionally unavailable as he was. Their dynamic was falling apart.

They weren't helping each other. It was a cycle that just kept eating itself. If Caleb couldn't close the lid on his emotions, then the girl had no anchor, and if the girl could only match his energy, then Caleb had no warmth. It was just chaos bumping chaos. He was only making it worse on her, fighting more than they were getting along. He was rubbing off on her.

But she wasn't at fault for the mess inside of Caleb. The truth was... Caleb was scared. The year passing by just reminded him that this life was very real, very permanent. He hadn't known how to cope with that knowledge. He knew if he kept living like this, if he ever settled, he won't be able to help but get comfortable and warm up to the idea of... of a family. Something that was so out of reach for him. These feelings seeped through the cracks of his mask, losing the cool game of pretend he constantly played with himself. But if she saw who he really was, all the broken parts, then he failed as a proper supportive brother.

It wasn't like they could ever rely on Josephine, anyways. With her new job, she was gone more often. Caleb relished the space, but he shouldn't have, as the lack of a parental figure only made the girl even lonelier. Which meant it was solely Caleb's duty to lend an ear.

Caleb had been so focused on the negatives that he forgot about the positives, and neglected to pay attention to her. Well, he was done ignoring her.

After all, they only had each other. Who else could understand how he felt? The very person who was going through the same experience and emotions as him, his other half. They had both lost Zayne.

Only... Caleb was used to upsetting her, making things worse. No matter how hard he tried, he always seemed to perform the wrong choice that hurt her in the end. But Zayne had discovered a secret, hidden talent of cheering her up. How could he ever live up to that?

But the world wouldn't last long with two grumpy kids. It wasn't fair. She should never have to be as grumpy as he was. She should only ever experience sunshine, so that their days were always bright.

A heavy sigh caressed his ears once more, as if it carried the whole weight of the world. Let me take that weight off your shoulders. Please.

"You can't be grumpy forever, Pip-squeak. You're supposed to be the happier one between us," Caleb muttered, tugging the blanket away.

But she yanked it back, avoiding his touch. She still wouldn't look him in the eye. The pitter-patter of rain seemed to make that interaction final, but Caleb wasn't about to let her get her way.

She had been sighing all day. He could even hear them from far away, which was how he located her so easily. She was currently hiding in a pile of blankets in the utility room.

Well, if nothing was working... he would just have to cheer her up in the only way he knew how, right?

"Let's go outside, Meimei. I'll take you somewhere. Just like we always did at the shelter."

The girl finally looked at him, the first sparkle entering her eyes that he had seen in the past few months. "...Where are we going?"

"It's a surprise. Now hurry! If we go now, we can avoid Gran finding out."

He held out his hand to her, like he did several times before. The girl giggled, tickling his ears, taking his hand, and they were off.

The fresh scent of petrichor sprayed their cheeks, engulfing them as mud and wet leaves sloshed underneath their feet with each trudge through the park.

"Isn't this where Zayne took us...?" the girl scanned their surroundings.

"Yeah. You said it was better than the shelter," Caleb said, leading her to the riverbank. "I saw planes flying nearby the last time we were here. I checked the area again a couple days ago, and sure enough, this has a perfect view of the DAA's takeoff spot from Skyhaven."

"Skyhaven... that's where Zayne went... and someday, it will take you away from me too," the girl lowered her head.

"No. Think of it this way. Doesn't looking at Skyhaven make you feel closer to him?"

"That's—"

An engine's roar swooped down, cutting her off. The plane soared through the twilight sky, leaving a contrail from Skyhaven to somewhere beyond the horizon.

"It's taking off!" the girl yelled over the flying machinery, her hair going every which way from the powerful fans beating down on them from below. Her shoulders shook, and suddenly she was laughing an entire fit, tears rolling from the corner of her eyes.

Caleb squinted, shielding his face from the strong wind that blew at his bangs. "It's a L380 Airliner."

"Bye bye, L380!" she waved.

Caleb stared at her. "The L380 is flying to other cities. It might be far away now, but it'll be back before you know it."

Just like Zayne... hopefully.

The girl understood what he meant. She clasped her hands in prayer, whispering reverently into her knuckles. "Let's meet again, L380! Stay strong!"

Caleb turned his gaze back to the sky. Planes continued to shoot out from Skyhaven like shooting stars. He recognized each make, each brand. Refreshing his knowledge of each purpose, reciting them under his breath, etching it to memory. Some day... he would be the one piloting those planes, surfing the clouds. This close, he could picture it almost perfectly. It was his biggest dream.

If anyone asked Caleb what made him so into planes, he wouldn't be able to answer. All he knew was that... he liked them. He liked watching them soar high into the sky, far away from what was hurting him. He wanted to fly. It was an intricate part of his personality, ingrained to his being as long as he can remember. Flying had always been the only path for him. It was something that needed to happen, his inevitable future.

Maybe it was the only way he'd be free. He'd fly far away, higher than anybody else, and take her some place beyond the clouds where no one else could touch them.

If she ever went into the sky again... he'd find her. If he conquered the skies, he could conquer anything, right? They'd never be apart.

"Gege..." the girl looked at him with bright eyes, no trace of the gloom left. "Thank you... I know I was being difficult. But... now all my worries are gone. Zayne must be working hard, so we have to be ready for when he comes back."

The clouds parted, pushed aside by the planes like a giant curtain, and the last glow of the sun shifted over the trees, casting them in red shadows. Against the tan of her skin, it gave her a rosy hue, as if she was doused in blush. Her lips curled into a soft smile, but when their eyes met, hers hiding behind fluttering lashes, they widened into a full blown grin that revealed her pearly whites, glinting with two gaps.

Bump.

"Well? Don't you think it's romantic?" the girl rested her head on his shoulder, where she fit exactly, like two halves of a whole. Everything about them fit so well together. And at this angle, he could feel the rise and fall of her chest as if she was another extension of him, her breath hitting his cheek.

He blinked slowly.

"Yeah. Perfect."

She was. Compared to him. She was... so...

Bump. Bump.

Oh, no. Oh no, oh no—

A single petal spiraled from the tree above, pulled by gravity. It landed in the girl's hair, then left it with a kiss, swinging elsewhere. It fluttered to the ground nearby, seeking shelter in the mud, only for a bird to swoop down, stomping on the petal. With its vicious beak, it pecked at the fragment bit by bit, tearing it apart, swallowing the pieces whole, not leaving behind a single crumb to even remember it by.

Caleb's heart raced in his chest. He gripped his shirt, twisting the fabric, as his breaths got short. An ache started there, then descended to the pit of his stomach. The ache was similar to the one he got whenever he stared at a plate of food after skipping meals, not eating in a while. His teeth clamped down on his bottom lip, rolling the flesh within his grasp until he tasted copper. He sucked, gulping down blood. It didn't help.

A loose groan escaped his throat, and he squirmed, tilting his head away from her. All the hairs of his body stood on end like fuzz, shocked by her touch.

He had been doing so well. He had thought that this feeling had vanished completely, that he had finally managed to bury it deep inside of him. For so long, he had refused to name it, convincing himself that it wasn't serious. And it hadn't resurfaced in so long, as if settling after he came to terms with his new role. He almost forgot it even existed...

But gases couldn't be contained in a glass jar for long. He had seen a teacher in the chemistry lab do so before. They mixed carbon disulfide with nitrous oxide. Shaken together, they went along well, but with a single touch of heat, the glass was devoured by the blue flame, releasing a sad howl into the air, a signal of defeat. Once the gases were ignited, the container vaporized, never coming back.

Caleb let go of his lip with a pop. What a nuisance. This was only going to complicate things. And he wasn't stupid enough to risk their lives, jeopardizing his mission. But he had already been wanting things—small at first. It started with simply just longing to be close to her, never leaving her side... until it escalated, coveting greater aspects of her presence. It was a slow, greedy kind of hunger that snaked its way inside of him, and the more he neglected it, the hungrier it got.

But he was family. He could never be anything other than her older brother. That's the way she wanted it, the only way she had accepted him into her life. Sure, he messed up a few times, but that's why he had been regulating his emotions around her, so she wouldn't see how depraved he really was. He was fine with it, fine with only ever being with her older brother. He had to be. After all, it granted him the privilege of being by her side, being closer to her than anyone else. But... it was starting to not be enough. And that was a major hiccup.

What would happen if he couldn't be the proper older brother she wanted, after all? It was only a matter of time before all the cracks fell away, fully revealing the monster within, the version of him she didn't want to see. And then... she'll abandon him again. Like Zayne had. Caleb could still see that look of fear in his eyes, the way he willingly turned his back on him, his accusatory tone. Zayne had said he was going to Skyhaven for research, but Caleb knew that Zayne was leaving because part of him was afraid—afraid of allowing whatever it was going on between them. And how could anyone who saw his flaws possibly want something with him?

This was why Caleb never wanted a sister, someone to call family. It was a pretty little fantasy not meant for him. Family required loyalty that Caleb would always give but never receive, and that was a lonely existence.

He never wanted to fall in love with anyone, either. Not that he even knew what "love" was. Love was an abstract idea that he heard about from several others, but never had any chance to relate. To him, love must have been cruel. It was a gilded cage, filled with lies. People in love had their wings clipped, rendering them helpless. But Caleb didn't want to dance to the tune of others anymore. He wanted to fly. But without realizing it, he had flied too high, too close to the sun, and was now in danger of falling down, being crushed by gravity. Just like that flower petal.

Life was never fair. Now that he had finally got a taste of the sun's warmth on his skin after being kept in the dark for so long, he didn't want to let go. He craved the light. In a life that was never his own, where everyone always left him, he desired something that, just for once, could be wholly and completely his.

And why couldn't it be the girl before him, who smiled at him so cutely? The only one who appreciated his own presence, who didn't look at him in fear? As long as she continued to think of him as her hero... would she stay with him forever?

Even though he knew better, even though it was forbidden, even though he knew there were more deserving options...

"Gege?" the girl's brow furrowed in concern, her eyes wavering as she looked up at him, like he was her entire world and she was scared of losing it, too.

He was doomed. He wasn't sure for how much longer he could pull this brother act off.

And the worst part was, this peace couldn't last. There were too many eyes on them, too many who also coveted their worth. It was only a matter of time before she was swept away, stolen by someone else who wasn't him. Someone who would've been more appropriate and worthy than he was.

He wished he never knew what love was. Because now he couldn't imagine a life without it.

*****

On their way back home, it started to drizzle again.

"From now on, don't suffer on your own. We're both hurting, so it's better if we work things out together," Caleb waved his hand, using his Evol to prevent any drops from touching them. "I don't like to see you in pain."

Don't hide from me again. I want to see all of you.

"What if I just run away and hide? Then I'll never have to tell you my secrets," the girl crossed her arms with a huff.

Caleb grabbed her arm, pulling it to him, undoing her shield. "You can't hide from me. If you hide, I'll just keep searching for you until we meet again. You know I can always find you."

The girl pursed her lips. "Okay... but you need to promise me you will. Don't ever give up on me."

He tightened his grip on her hand, lifting them up between them. "Of course."

His gaze landed on the store they went to after school every week for groceries. They slowed to a stop.

"Remember when we went here with Zayne...?" the girl mumbled.

"Yeah..." Caleb headed towards the back. "Follow me. I want to show you something."

They snuck into the garden. It was the same place, but there were some changes. The endless summers were nowhere to be found, not yet the time for them to bloom. Caleb had also grown taller, his head now reaching past halfway the stone wall. He slid his favorite green messenger bag off his shoulder, never failing to bring it everywhere he went, rummaging its contents. He pulled out some finger paint.

"What are you doing?" the girl whispered, tip toeing to his side.

"It's just like how we doodle on the walls back home," Caleb said, dipping his fingers in white paint. He then smeared them on the wall. "Let's leave our mark here. Hurry, before it starts to rain again."

He handed the paint to the girl.

The girl glanced at it, then looked back at Caleb. "But Grandma always scolds us when we do that."

"Yet she never washes any of it away. Besides, she isn't here," Caleb shook the can. "You scared?"

The girl bit her lip, snatching the can from him. "I can't reach that spot yet."

"No problem," he offered his hand to her once more. She carefully slid her hand into his. Their fingers intertwining, a light glow wrapped around them, and the girl floated into the air. Together, their fingers brushed along the cold, smooth surface.

Pulling back from the wall, what remained was two stick figures. One tall, one short—their hands were connected. The tall figure carried an umbrella in his other hand, acting like a torch that led the way, its canopy extending over them, protecting the smaller one.

"Why an umbrella?"

"Because from now on, whenever it rains, I'll shield you from the cold."

They didn't need Zayne. He could do this on his own.

The girl stared at the painting, her hand clinging to his.

"Hey, Gege..."

"Yes?" Caleb asked, looking down at her.

"You... have always been good at finding me. How do you know where I am?"

He had given her a ton of reasons before. He swallowed. "Maybe it's because... I love you a little more than you realize."

“He’s gone!” the voice shouted, their grip squeezing her shoulders. “He’s… gone…”

The girl froze. A deafening silence had taken over.

No… No.

"…I’m sorry," the voice whispered, trembling, as if they were trying so hard to keep their words short to suppress any emotion, but failing as their breath hitched high near the end anyways, giving them away. But how could they choke? How could anyone possibly understand what she was feeling right now in this moment? The voice grew quieter, as if stepping back, leaving her cold. "There was nothing we could do. His body was completely burned when we found him. You… you were the only survivor, Ana.”

The world tipped upside down.

“No… No, you’re lying!” the girl slammed her fists against their chest. “No… No, he wouldn’t leave me… He promised…"

Her chest was heaving up and down. Why was it so hard to breathe?

Strong arms wrapped around her. Chill and familiar. “Well, he’s always been a fool… but you need to remain strong. I… I can’t lose you, too.”

“Grandma… Gege… I’m… I’m all alone now,” she sobbed. “What am I going to do?”

Zayne opened and closed his mouth. He wanted to tell her, “you have me.” But he couldn't bring himself to say it. He was never good at saying what he meant, always fumbling what could've been interesting if only he had the courage and proper skill. As if someone else was controlling his words to ensure he could never be honest or selfish.

He had been by her side the whole time, worried she would never wake up again. His eyes were heavy from lack of sleep. It was… strange. The last few times she was like that, in a coma, he had been too scared to face her. But he was nothing more than a silly child back then, having yet to grow into his full potential as a proper caretaker. Now… well, he had to be by her side. He was the only one who could save her. And… now he was all she had left.

At least, that's what he wanted to believe. But the truth was… he wasn't the only person in her life anymore.

And now that she was awake… he couldn’t hold off all the others worried about her. He frowned. Two of them were men. One of them was… one of those people. Silver hair, blue eyes. Not quite pure, like the ones he knew, with hair as white as snow, but… something dirtier. A false god who pretended they were the light they wielded. Although, the meddler claimed to be her partner in work. He had asked the most questions, seemingly more worried about the circumstances surrounding the explosion than the girl's own injuries. He then left without a word, save for the hardened glare he tossed Zayne. He hadn't been too happy to hear that he was her doctor. Perhaps it was more accurate to say he was worried about Zayne being near her, or that was Zayne's own guilty conscience talking again.

The other was a young artist Zayne recognized from the news. He was less inquisitive. Rather, he just complained about his "bodyguard" not being in touch, and how her injuries would prevent her from coming back to his side anytime soon. But years of being around Caleb had taught Zayne how to read people, and the artist's eyes… didn't match the friendly smile he gave. Regardless, Zayne had shooed him away so he wouldn't disturb the girl while she slept. Now the whole room smelled strangely of fish and ocean whenever he turned his head, but surely that wasn't possible. Those people were extinct, or at the very least endangered and filtered out, so it didn't make sense for one to be here. It had to just be some oddly strong choice of perfume. Just like his bold choice of hair dye… at least, it wasn't a color that could possibly be natural. But no, if he was like that, wouldn't he have scales?

And looking out the window… maybe Zayne was going crazy, but he could swear he had seen that same crow pass by three times already. And that was only today, not counting the other days. Crows didn't venture near the hospital. What kind of horrible luck was following this girl?

He shook his head. No. It wasn't any of his business. Of course, her line of work would have her meeting all kinds of different people. But he couldn't pass off this bad feeling he was having…

All these variables couldn't be a coincidence if she was involved.

“We were just talking not too long ago," the girl whispered, tugging on his sleeve, grounding Zayne in the present. "It’s all my fault… if I hadn’t argued with him outside… maybe he would've never gone inside… and at least…"

"There's no sense in what ifs and regrets now," Zayne clasped her hand with his, applying slight pressure. He sighed. “It’s not your fault… no one could have predicted this. But… you should stay low for the time being. The explosion impacted your chest which bruised your heart and triggered your arrhythmia. We had to perform an emergency procedure to save you from entering cardiac arrest. You just barely made it out alive. And… it’s possible someone is targeting you…”

She wiped her eyes. “But… who would do that?”

It seemed her senses had fully come back. Good. Now they can discuss properly.

“…Have you been prying into something dangerous?”

She bit her lip, her eyes wavering. “I…”

Zayne furrowed his brow.

And this was why she was a variable, a ticking time bomb. According to the rules, he shouldn't even be indulging himself around her. But no matter how much trouble she caused, he couldn't stay away from her. He was like a moth to a flame, or perhaps more accurately… she was a drug he couldn't let go. She was the one variable he didn't mind. He always came back to her, even though he knew she was bad for him. But… Zayne had always been one to turn his back on destiny. His destiny was going to be one he created with his own hands. Or else… he'd be breaking his promise to Caleb.

…He owed him that much, now that the recently deceased man had left this mess behind for him to deal with…

“Stay. Low. Don’t do anything on your own. Caleb will never forgive me if you hurt yourself.” 

“I miss him…” she sniffed. “And… now I’ll never see him again. I’ll never get the chance to apologize… to tell him…”

That you loved him? His heart twisted painfully. He understood that regret all too well.

If they had said it… if they had paid more attention… would things have gotten this far, gone so wrong?

Zayne wiped her cheek. “Don’t dwell on that. He wouldn’t want you to dwell. He always hated when you cried.” 

“Did he…?” she mumbled. “But then… why does he always make me cry?”

What on earth had they been arguing about?

“…Get some rest. I’ll be here if you need me," his thumb lingered on her cheek before finally pulling away. "Keep an eye on your heart. You'll need a few follow ups before you're safe to work again. Don't overdo it."

Zayne turned on his heel, leaving her alone in the room.

His feet wandered over to the lab where the bodies were. One of them was Josephine. The other Caleb. He was still wearing his DAA uniform, having just come home on a brief vacation… but now it was all charred and torn, crumbling to ash, as if it never mattered.

Zayne approached closer, his breath shaking. The burden on his shoulders weighed heavier with each step. He still hadn't had much alone time with the girl. It was always just… the three of them. Together. Wherever she went, Caleb had followed. He was her other half. Yin and Yang. Caleb had more experience than he did. He had spent fourteen years with the girl. Zayne had only known her for less than two. Would there ever come a day when he knew the girl for longer than Caleb…? That was a very real possibility. One he didn't want to think about, because Caleb was always supposed to be the one who knew her best, knew her the longest. Maybe Zayne had wanted the girl to himself at times, but Caleb was a non-negotiable part of her life that he couldn't ever deny, and he had been relying on him to guide their interactions, as things only ever went south when Zayne was left to his own devices. But now… it really was just the two of them. What was going to happen, without Caleb in their lives? Could he do this alone? The nightmare was just beginning. It was up to Zayne to protect her now… for the both of them. 

A task he had been given by the adults around them since the day they met, but that he had always seem to fail to do, no matter how much he strived to improve.

Was this how Caleb felt when he left? No wonder why he had been so desperate.

As he got closer— 

“Something feels… off,” Zayne frowned. He reached for the body—

“Dr. Li? What are you doing?”

Zayne immediately turned around, folding his hands behind his back. What was he thinking? That wasn't proper conduct. It was contamination of a crime scene, and well out of his own jurisdiction. One of the orderlies stood in the doorway, brow furrowed as they gazed at Zayne. “…I got distracted. Did you need something?”

“Yes, there’s a patient—”

The words faded into the background. Zayne was already walking out of the lab, listening to reports and giving orders.

No. It couldn’t be, could it?

*****

"Patrol complete. All routes clear."

The tall man in black lowered his gun, smoke coming off the barrel. The body before him toppled over, but before the face could hit the dirt, the body disintegrated.

Another failure…

Just how many were left to go?

Each time he did this, the man felt like he was observing everything through a small window. He was used to being the one trapped in a cell, studied like an animal. Now he was the one outside of it, but it still felt like he was being watched, caged within walls. Just another experiment.

That familiar feeling rose up from his stomach, into his chest, wanting to burst out from his throat. His heart constricted, its thuds echoing in his ears, throbbing until a small ringing took its place. He shoved it back down, into the tiny box where all his emotions go, untouchable.

Don't feel. Don't remember. That's how you survive. He let out a steady breath. His mind unraveled until there was nothing left, like a projector sucking up the film reel to completion. Only a still calm took its place, empty and numb.

He wasn't the one on the floor anymore. He was the one with the gun. They would never take him away again.

"Report back to HQ," the man said coolly, turning around, his back to the ashes scattering in the air. The men by his side slid their boots together and saluted.

The man took a step forward. From his peripheral, he saw someone break their formation and lunge for him.

They didn't get far. They were soon frozen in place, their body suspended in mid air. Their mouth released a garble of noises as the air compressed their insides. A few seconds later they collapsed to the ground, their cracking bones indistinguishable from the crunch of gravel, their muscles contracting and spasming. Then they went completely still.

The man sighed. "It seems we've left some moles to slip through the cracks."

His boot splashed into a puddle, leaving them all behind.

Heels smacked against clean metal as the man consumed the walkway in long strides, his coat flapping from th\e back, slapping his thighs. He adjusted his gloves, keeping the brim of his hat low on his face, obscuring his eyes. His foggy reflection was enlarged on the floor and walls, giving him a bigger presence.

He paused in front of a door. Swiping his right hand over the lock, the door clicked, and slid open.

As soon as he entered, a blue hologram displayed in the room. An elderly man, with a weathered face and graying hair. But no matter how much time had passed… the man still carried the dark gaze of a monster. A monster that matched his own.

“Professor,” the younger one said, halting to a stop, placing his hands behind his straight back, his head bowed.

"Colonel," its voice drawled. "Report…?"

"…We still have not uncovered any successful experiments," the Colonel said firmly. "And there is still conflict within the Fleet, but I'm taking care of any old-fashioned minds who feel too strongly about our new cause."

Out with the old, in with the new. That was the current objective.

"…Good. Within time, EVER will have full control over the Farspace Fleet, and we can start exerting our influence on the other Fleets. We'll wheedle out the rest of the competition accordingly."

"Thanks to the government leaving Skyhaven to scientists, and our implants in other areas, the take over has been easy," the Colonel stated. "Skyhaven is already dependent on the Fleet. They believe in our protection and technology." 

EVER’s slow reign over every aspect of research and warfare had been a long and steady process in the making. The implants in the Fleet, N109 Zone, Xander Sciences, Hunters Association, universities, and the major hospitals all led to the same goal of a new and better world. All expendable pawns in a grander scheme. The Colonel had played a very crucial role in setting it all in motion. The explosions and test subjects wouldn’t have happened without his help. From the beginning, the Colonel knew it was wiser to be on their side than against. 

"And that's how we slowly suffocate them until they have nowhere else to turn but us," the hologram smiled. "I trust everything is going to plan, then?"

"Yes, Professor."

"Excellent. I always knew you would be a valuable chess piece."

"I've been well aware of my place since the beginning. I'm simply following your orders."

"You're too modest," the Professor waved his hand. "I think of you as my son. The best out of all my children. It's a shame you still refuse to call me 'Father,' though… is some of that rebellious spirit still in there?"

The Colonel finally lifted his head to look the Professor in the eye. "…If that were the case, Father… may I ask why more and more of my soldiers are after my head these days? I thought you had already gotten rid of the resisters. But it seems you've been slipping. Almost on purpose. I'm still picking up extra work. It's distracting me from my other duties."

"You have complaints?" the Professor tilted his head. "I thought you said you were handling it. Naturally, no one would accept you with open arms. You still need to prove yourself. Haven't I taught you anything? Some friendly competition can do you some good, keep you ripe. You haven't fully passed the test yet. The others will come to trust your loyalty if you show just how dedicated you are to securing your position."

"Right…" the Colonel lowered his head. "My mistake for speaking out of turn."

"Don't let yourself turn into a liability, Colonel," the Professor narrowed his eyes. "Or that will become your biggest mistake. You're still flawed. I've been letting you off the hook because of the deal we made… but too much emotion will only hinder you. You're the Colonel of the Farspace Fleet now, and the Fleet has always stood for looking beyond the earth. Letting go of home would be so much easier if everyone only focused on their responsibilities rather than sentiments, don't you agree? That's why we're taking over the Fleet. They align with our goals. This is for the best of humankind."

The Colonel didn't say anything. The Professor continued, "Speaking of, we may proceed with the next step in our plan. You've been working in the shadows. Now is the time to make an appearance. That should help get rid of the back talkers."

The Colonel sucked in a breath. He had to keep his voice steady, uninterested. "You mean…"

"Yes. We'll take a break from the Deepspace explorations and focus on our real mission. It's time to come back… and remove the main thorn in our side," the Professor's eyes crinkled in what appeared to be the first genuine joy he displayed. The Colonel's stomach fell. "It's been a while, hasn't it? I'm sure you must be overwhelmed by this."

"…Not at all. I've left that behind me. I only care about our family's goals," the Colonel said monotonously.

"That's all you have to say about the one you grew up with, who you spent your whole life seeking…?"

He was taunting him. The Colonel clenched his fists.

"I won't let anyone get in my way."

That was the truth. What kind of fierce hunter would he be if he allowed a bird to take down a leopard? He was faster, stronger… more powerful.

He was used to falling behind. Watching from afar as they shined without him, an outlier who didn't belong. No more. This time, for sure, he was going to upstage them all. No one was going to take that away from him. This fate was going to be his, and his alone, no matter whose hands he had to pry it from.

Only he deserved to suffer. That was his repentance to bear.

"Well… maybe they will prove more useful than you, anyhow. You've always been a disappointment, but we can't let all our hard work go to waste. If you don't want to turn into a total failure, it would be wise to just do what you're told and ensure those pesky emotions don't resurface when you meet. In time… you won't have to worry about them, once we get rid of them all. Then you can focus on your role as the seeker without issue. The capture will be your own doing, just like we promised."

The Colonel paused, his body stiffening, like machine parts rusting over after a long time of disuse. “…Yes. As you wish.” 

"Keep me updated. The Fountain of Atei is within our reach."

The hologram turned off.

The Colonel strolled the lonely halls once again. Turning a corner, he caught a few of his soldiers. They didn't look at him, gave no greeting. Their stares were blank and cold, their lips set in firm lines. They never smiled, never laughed. Not that they could, anyways. A world filled with decay was not a world worth living in.

They were all the same. Faceless. Demons. Ghosts—neither alive or dead, hanging on in the between. Even the humans from before had more variety than this. More soul, however rotten. But there was always one face who stood out to him above the rest.

"Welcome home! How was your trip?"

Voices from the past long gone and lost caressed his ears, begging for his gaze. They vanished in the wake of these mindless drones, devoid of any warmth or life. He had already forgotten what a home felt like. Home was the privilege of good children. He was never meant to have one.

The puppets all sought… approval. For what? They were never going to get it. The moment the Colonel sought approval for anything would be the day he had fully lost himself. He may have lost his soul, sacrificed it for greater interests, but he had yet to lose his mind. It would be the day he became no better than them. It was best to remove the spoils before it infected him entirely.

It was all just… an act. A game for him to master. That's all it ever was. His life was never his own.

And now… he was going back to where it all started. Except this time… he had power at his fingertips. He was not sure if going back was wise. He was never the one. As much as he always wanted to be first, it just felt like he would always be second, just like his given number. He was stuck forever chasing like the leopard he was, never catching up. He wasn't getting anywhere by clinging onto something that would never be his. It only brought him despair. And they saw… they saw how broken he was. He wasn't able to keep acting. And in the end, he was abandoned. They were well without him. That's why… he left.

Guarantees were better than hopeless dreams. They never let him down.

But he should've known better. A pilot always reaches their destination eventually, no matter how far they stray. A flight path was like a circle—bound to come back around. And he had been gone for too long. It was time.

He had never been good at letting things go. His whole existence had been based on seeking things beyond his reach, after all.

The Colonel opened the latch. A series of lights popped up from monitors, showcasing coordinates and other data from Deepspace. But one display was different from the rest. It beeped on and off, a steady rhythm in time with his heart. It was the only signal from Earth.

His destination.

His gloved hand gently brushed the screen, feeling the smooth glass underneath his palm. His left hand, that was. He always used his left hand to feel. His right hand was no longer capable of such things. A reminder of all that he had sacrificed to get here.

An electric buzz sparked in his right arm. For the first time in a long time, against his will, his heart fluttered.

He had to admit, he was curious… what will happen when they meet? What expression will he see? He had imagined the scenario in his head, over and over again. But nothing could live up to reality. It was a day he had waited for with increased longing. No one was going to take it from him. He had always been a patient man, but he was reaching his limit, now that he was so close to his goal.

Things would never be the same again. They weren't innocent children anymore. He was no longer a lost, useless puppy. In his place was something dark and intense. Controlled. A predator.

But one truth remained. A motto he lived by. He would always be… a protector.

The Colonel lowered himself into the cockpit, steepling his hands over his stomach, crossing his legs. The fabric of his long coat rustled with his movements, flowing off the sides. 

He turned his head, the glint of the mirror catching his eye. His reflection stared back at him—two swirling pools of black holes.

“I’m coming home, Pip-squeak. Missed me?”  

#####

Now that the fic is over, it is time for me to do revisions! The revisions won't happen right away, as I plan on catching up with the game and waiting out more updates in case I need to make any drastic changes to the plot, but I'll be slowly working my way to making this fic better than before. These revisions might not happen for at least a year or so to accommodate updates and so I can also let it sit before coming back to it. I’ll let you know when I start them.

That said, NOTHING IMPORTANT WILL BE CUT FROM MY FIC. The biggest change would be me adjusting the background to suit canon more—which would mean rewrites regarding politics of the organizations and civilizations at play (Gaia, EVER, Lemuria, the Fleets).

I may also include possible sixth LI (Valko) references now that’s he’s been revealed, depending on if any of it can fit what I already have. If I can’t include Valko, I’ll make up for it in the bonus chapters. But he will be added at some point—I already love him.

This shouldn't affect the overall story too much. I had purposely kept these plot points vague to serve as placeholders until I formed a better idea for them. So really, all I'm doing is fleshing out the plot so it can hold stronger.

I have already done some minor revisions here and there, and these instances were as small as just rephrasing certain dialogue.

Besides that—the rest is just me cleaning up the logistics of my fic so it flows better. If anything, I'll be ADDING rather than removing (although I will be getting rid of fluff words). I'll be fixing/tightening up/strengthening plot holes, repetition, foreshadowing, themes, references to their past lives, structure, dialogue, pacing, characterization, descriptions, medical terms, real life inaccuracies (further research), basic grammar mistakes, etc. I may be working on this for a long time, as I always struggle with finding satisfaction in my work.

I will be reblogging the chapters after each major revision for anyone who wishes to reread. And I’ll be attempting to design my posts all fancy like I’ve seen some other writers do here.

The girl looked up, eyes puffy. "You mean... in episode 12, when Ta-Ta goes out to sea, but gets caught in a storm?"

Zayne's face fell. "Uh..."

The girl giggled. "Sure. Let's do that. And we'll do better than Ta-Ta!"

Caleb nodded his head. "Yeah. We'll be so good, we'll beat her in a race. How's that sound?"

The girl skipped outside. The boys sighed in relief.

"I was getting worried she'll never come back out," Caleb threw his head back as they walked along the park. In the distance, the floating island of Skyhaven loomed overhead. "...I don't want to see that look on her face again."

But Caleb glanced warily at Zayne, his eyes stormy. "I just wish... I was the one who made her smile instead."

Zayne faltered. "I didn't do much. I even almost messed up. She smiles at you more, anyways. I'm..."

"Wait," Caleb stopped, holding his hand out in front of Zayne. Up ahead, a jungle of trees invaded the sidewalk, their leaves grazing anyone who walked by. The girl had been wading her way through the ambush when a branch snagged onto her clothes, the leaves tickling the small patch of skin above her back.

"What... is that?" the girl went still, her eyes wide.

"There, do you see it? It's resting on the leaf," Caleb whispered, stalking slowly behind her. "That kind of beetle lived during the dinosaur's time. It's one of the oldest creatures on Earth."

The girl shuddered. Caleb tapped her shoulder, and she jumped back, flailing through the leaves, screaming on the top of her lungs. "Ah, take it away!"

"Oh, no. Pip-squeak," Caleb shook his head, sounding grave. "This beetle is poisonous. And it looks like it bit you. What are we going to do now?"

"Zayne, help me!" the girl cried, leaping into his arms, clinging onto him like a koala. "You're a doctor, aren't you?"

Awkwardly patting her, Zayne glared at Caleb, unimpressed.

Caleb clucked his tongue at her. "Maybe you should've stayed inside, after all. The outside world has too many dangerous things, doesn't it?"

"N-no," the girl shook her head, tightening her grip on Zayne, her fingers tugging on his clothes. "Then I would never have been here with you and Zayne. This park... it's better than the shelter, isn't it? Everything is actually in tact."

Caleb gritted his teeth. "But our shelter still had charm. Even with all the broken things... that's what made it fun."

"Caleb..." Zayne warned slowly. Cut it out.

Caleb suddenly smiled, flicking the girl's forehead. "Dummy."

The girl stiffened. "You... you were lying, weren't you? There was no bug!"

Caleb cackled, dodging her swing. "You're just too easy, Pip-squeak. But see? You didn't want to be cooped up. So don't do that again, okay?"

Grumbling, the girl pushed Zayne away and continued up the path.

Zayne glanced at Caleb, whose gaze was still fixed intently on the girl.

"...Why did you do that? Did you actually wish she was stuck inside?"

"No. I meant what I said about not wanting to see that look on her face ever again. Being shut out is the worst feeling in the world," he clenched his fists. "But... she went to you first, didn't she?"

Zayne blinked. "That's what you were trying to prove?"

Caleb shrugged. "Give yourself more credit."

He went ahead.

This guy... he's impossible to fully understand. Zayne sighed.

They rented out a three person pedal boat. The boat was in a shape of a swan, with wings on the sides and a head that craned above the center. The girl's feet barely reached the pedals of the swan boat, leaving Zayne and Caleb having to do most of the work. The two of them gazed forward to Skyhaven. Eventually, their careers would take them both to the floating island of dreams—the world's newest bustling hub of research and space exploration. But their futures were different. One was destined to become a doctor, the other a pilot.

Zayne stuck his hand out the side of the boat, stroking the water. The fish danced around his fingers, attracted to the cold.

The girl clapped her hands in glee. "Oh, this reminds me of—"

She frowned, lowering her hands. "Hm... at least, it feels familiar."

Zayne cocked his head at her. "What does? The fish?"

She nodded. "For some reason... I'm always drawn to the water."

Zayne looked down at the fish. "...Since we can't go to Cloudia Island... what about the aquarium?"

The wind howled, almost drowning out his words, but it was too late. They were out in the open. He couldn't take them back now. Zayne... had done the impossible. He finally gathered the courage to invite her somewhere. A normal outing.

It was just—she had looked so sad... and he simply wanted to cheer her up. That was all. He wanted her to reflect back on this summer with nothing but happy memories, no regrets. A replacement of the dreadful summer before. His way of making up for his mistakes.

That's... what friends did, right?

"The... aquarium?" the girl's eyes glittered.

"Yeah," Zayne nodded, looking away from her. "There's one close by."

Caleb flinched, his feet slipping from the pedals, swaying the boat. "What...?"

Zayne turned to him, startled.

"And... Caleb can come with," Zayne added, sweating. "For moral support."

"No..." Caleb shook his head. "Not there..."

"Oh..." Zayne tucked his hand back into his lap, water dripping from his fingers.

Was his suggestion really that awful? Was that not what people normally did? He thought it was a good idea...

"I mean..." Caleb waved his hands, settling back into his seat. "Just... too crowded, you know? We'd get lost."

Zayne frowned. "I'll make sure we don't get lost, then."

"But..." Caleb bit his lip. He closed his eyes. Then let out a long breath. "Okay. Fine. We can go."

But Zayne couldn't shake off the sad, resigned look that entered Caleb's gaze.

*****

The aquarium was a giant glass dome. Inside was a kaleidoscope of blues and pinks. The colors rained down on them like disco balls. It reminded Zayne of glitter in a snow globe. He wished he could trap all this happiness inside of one.

He had never actually been to an aquarium before, but it had been on his list of things to do that other people did. Clutching onto the girl's hand while Caleb held the other, Zayne swept his gaze over the glass cages. Their reflections melded with the sea creatures, as if they were all part of the same cell.

"I know some of these..." the girl mumbled. "Someone told me about them before."

"Who?" Caleb asked. His gaze had been flitting back and forth ever since they arrived. His fingers were wrapped in a death grip around the girl's.

"Gege... you're hanging on too tight," the girl whined.

Caleb released her hand, wiping his palms on his pants. "Sorry. It's just... we've never been alone in such a giant crowd before."

"Are you really alright? We can always head back..." Zayne furrowed his brow. Caleb was unusually pale.

"No, I'm fine. Meimei, let's get something to eat. Forget about the fish," Caleb said, dragging them towards the food court.

The girl blinked, then gazed at Zayne. "...He only calls me that when something's wrong."

But... what was wrong?

The buzz of the crowd accompanied their ears as they each held a bowl of sorbet in their hands.

"You guys go ahead..." Caleb said, his eyes looking at something behind them. "There's an... exhibit I want to see. Don't make me hold you back."

Caleb patted Zayne's shoulder, fading away. Zayne's lips pressed into a thin line. Caleb, wanting space from them?

"He just does whatever he wants," the girl sighed. "At least we finally got some alone time, Zayne. I don't think we've ever had that yet."

Zayne blushed. His clothes suddenly felt too tight against his skin.

Strange. He had wanted Caleb gone before, but now he was wishing the rowdy boy was still here as the girl tugged his hand, pulling him wherever she went, helpless to her desires.

"You know... I wonder if they actually like being trapped inside there," the girl whispered as they strolled down the windy paths.

Zayne glanced at a sign. Lemurian. It was the fifth tank they've passed by so far with that word. And each time, the girl sighed heavily, as if empathizing.

"I don't think anyone likes to be trapped," Zayne said. "It's not a great feeling."

"Mm," the girl hummed, staring down at her sorbet. Shadows fled over her features as a giant eel swam above their heads.

They headed into an open area, cascaded in a sea of bright lights. She turned to gaze at him, her eyes twinkling like exploding stars. Zayne's mouth parted, as if she was robbing his soul through his breath.

It wasn't the first time he thought this... but her emotions were beautiful. They flashed across her face like a fireworks display—never the same, constantly changing, impossible to keep up. Zayne had long thought he preferred consistency over change, statistics over the unknown. But since being with her, he discovered... change and raw curiosity weren't so bad.

He swallowed. His heart racing. Meeting her had also warped his perspective. He suddenly found himself wanting things he never wanted before—spending idle time together, worrying about his appearance, coveting her smile for himself. He was growing attached to sentimentality.

"Zayne...?" she whispered, blending with the vibrations and echoes of the ocean around them. "Is something wrong...?"

He leaned closer to her. "I can't hear you."

The girl laughed. It was always a delicate jingle that chimed in his ears. All she had to do was smile at him, and he lost any thought he had. It shouldn't have been so pleasing, not when her lips and teeth were stained orange. And yet, she was the sweetest thing in the room, sweeter than the candy he always snuck into his pocket.

It was illogical. It was irrational. It was... freeing. She made him free.

Oh. He sucked in a breath. Something was there. And he could feel it on the edge of his tongue, begging to be released to the wind.

But she had turned her head again, and the moment shattered. All that was left was a tiny speck of soft orange on her cheek, left over from the sorbet.

Even that was enough to contrast against the endless blue.

He reached out his thumb, swiping it away. She looked at him again, her eyelashes fluttering. A strand of her hair had fallen over her eyes. His hand moved, brushing the strand behind her ear. Then he pulled away. He averted his gaze, finding an interest in the display next to them. "You're a mess."

She opened her mouth. For a retort? But it never escaped her lips either. A ball of white zoomed past them, hitting her in the cheek.

Zayne blinked. The girl turned, but when she opened her mouth again, another white ball hit her in the mouth. She spluttered. The orange stains washed away, absorbed by the white as it fell from her lips.

Zayne followed her gaze to the center of the room. There was a seal laying on an iceberg, flinging its tail, throwing balls of ice and snow at passersby. Its high-pitched vocals sounded like melodious laughter. It bared its maw at the girl, catapulting another ball. She closed her eyes as it hit her in the chest.

Zayne covered his mouth, looking away.

"Not... not another word!" the girl yelled, crushing her empty sorbet bowl. She yanked on his arm, throwing the bowl away. "Let's go somewhere else! This place sucks."

"What about Caleb? He might miss us."

"Don't worry. Caleb always knows where to find me."

*****

They went back to the park, on Zayne's insistence, so that Caleb wouldn't have to look too far for them. He still hadn't come back, and Zayne still couldn't figure out what had upset him.

As they wandered, sounds of nature enveloped them. A swallow perched on a bench nearby.

"This is better, isn't it? The animals are free here," the girl said, staring at the swallow. "What do you think?"

The swallow gave a high pitched chirp in response.

"That swallow sounds like you," Zayne mused. But when he saw the expression on her face, he quickly backtracked. "But you sometimes look like a squirrel, when your cheeks puff out."

Oh god, he was rambling now.

"What...?" her face twisted, eyes tearing up.

"I-I mean... it's a compliment... I think they're very... cute."

Ugh. What was he even saying? This is why he needed Caleb here. He always screwed up around her. It wasn't that he was shy, he just... didn't know how to connect.

"You... really like animals, don't you, Zayne?" the girl sniffed, rubbing her eyes. But she was smiling again. That was good, right?

"They're... acceptable," Zayne pushed up his glasses, avoiding her eyes. "They're not human."

"And... what's so wrong about humans?" the girl asked, rocking their connected arms. "There's a swing set there. Come on! Caleb said he used to push me all the time back at the shelter."

She climbed onto the seat, beckoning Zayne over. Zayne hesitated. He only ever imagined this. He didn't expect actually doing it. He then settled behind her, and began to gently sway the chains dangling above her.

"You never answered my question," the girl stated, extending her legs with each incline. "What do you think about humans?"

"Human is... what you and Caleb are," Zayne struggled, the creak of the beams punctuating his words. "It's what everyone is. I can't say if that's good or bad. But... it's not me."

The girl looked up at him. "That's silly. What do you mean it's not you?"

"...It's just not," Zayne clenched the chains. "I don't feel things like you do. I... sometimes get jealous of how Caleb is around you. Like you're breathing life into him. I guess part of me thought that being around you would produce the same results. But I'm just as confused as before."

The girl planted her feet on the ground. "Jealousy is an emotion, isn't it?"

"What?" Zayne paused, his hands slipping from the chains.

The girl stood up, turning around to face Zayne. "Come here."

He maneuvered around the set, joining her in the grassy plain. She took his hands. "I'll be honest... I thought you were a snowman at first. But you're more than that, Zayne."

"A snowman?" he raised an eyebrow.

She twisted her arms, and he circled around her. Were they... dancing? Without music? No, he knew better. The environment was their music.

"Doesn't this feel nice? The summer heat on our faces, the grass underneath our feet. It's not often we can enjoy moments like this," the girl told him, twirling around, one foot in front of the other. Flower petals stirred with their movements. In the sunlight, her body seemed to glow. She had no care in the world. She faced him, placing a hand over his chest, where his heart was. "And... you have a heart beat. That's important, right?"

Zayne stiffened. His heart beat couldn't possibly be measured when it was going so fast.

The girl grinned at him. "See? You are human. You smile, you laugh, you frown, you dream, you breathe. That's all you need. It's not about who you are, where you came from. It's the experience. You're human because you here with us, in this moment."

Was that why she never concerned about her health, and prioritized her desires? What was truly best for the heart?

She slid her hand up his chest, then pressed both hands against his cheeks.

He froze, his eyes wide. This warmth...

Flashes of images broke through his reality, and with it, an incredible sense of loss. A cold hand that was never able to touch for the last time. That familiar ache in his head throbbed. He blinked it away. All he knew was...

He didn't want to lose this warmth ever again—the warmth she poured into him with just a single touch, ebbing away the coldness he had been accustomed to since birth. He'd do whatever it took to keep it.

A gnawing hunger consumed him, similar to the passion that grew in his chest. But stronger. More intense.

He held her wrists, his thumbs gently rubbing the skin, leaning into her touch.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For... making me see. Now I think I understand how Caleb feels."

Zayne still wasn't entirely sure if he was human. But... he was starting to figure out what was so special about humanity.

Caleb said Zayne was the one with the calming effect. He had to disagree. It was her. She stoked their fires but also cooled their demons.

Yes... he didn't want to lose this...

He understood. So that's what this feeling was. What he had failed to put into words earlier.

"During the time we've spent together, you've been the most compassionate person I've ever met," the girl whispered, her lips only mere inches away from his.

He closed his eyes. "More than Caleb?"

She giggled. "You know how selfish he can be."

What if... Zayne wanted to be a little selfish too?

He was tired. Tired of hanging onto the past, tired of fretting over a future that has yet to happen. He just wanted to live in the now. With her.

Zayne pushed closer.

"Oh!" the girl exclaimed, slipping away from him. All that remained was the breeze. A profound emptiness pooled into his belly. It always ended this way.

"Zayne, look! Popsicles!" the girl cheered. He opened his eyes. The girl had taken notice of a popsicle stall to the side. A figure stood underneath the mini umbrella, their eyes shielded by a cap. When they moved their gaze up, Zayne noted a flash of silver hair, but with a hit of sunlight, it glittered more like blond. The man's dark eyes burned through him, and Zayne couldn't suppress his shudder as the man handed a popsicle to an approaching family, but without a glance, his eyes fixated on him instead.

Quickly turning his gaze, Zayne caught notice of the popsicles he was selling as the family passed by them.

Old Popsicles.

The same brand from that day.

"Should we get some?" the girl pondered.

"But... we just had sorbet," Zayne said. His palms dipped in temperature.

"There's no such thing as too many sweets," the girl nodded her head. "You wait here. I'll get some for us!"

Zayne couldn't move. He could only stare as the girl sashayed away. He wanted to chase after her...

He looked down, flexing his hand. A glow flickered from it, like an old lightbulb fizzling out. Power slowly surged through his body, as if recharged.

Her touch... resonance.

The girl came back with a popsicle in each hand. But by the time she returned, the juice was already dripping down her fingers.

"Bummer... it's too hot," the girl pouted. "Oh, I know! Zayne, your Evol is ice, isn't it? Do you think you can...?"

She shoved the popsicles his way, lifting them up to his face.

His world was swallowed by darkness.

Zayne backed away. "S-stay away from me..."

"Zayne?" the girl frowned, following after him. "What's wrong—"

"I said stay away!" Zayne yelled, tripping over his feet.

"Oh... is it me?" the girl lowered her hands. "I just thought... I thought we were getting closer..."

A thick frost creeped over the ground around them. It stretched all the way to river, freezing it solid. The air turned rigid, white fog floating above the park. Only silence reigned. The end of the world.

His hands and feet hardened, black ice encasing his body.

He was transported back to that day they met. The creeping vines, the dead flowers, the creak of a swing set, the foresaken popsicle. It was all the same.

It was happening. It was happening all over again. He couldn't stop it.

One day... you will hurt her again.

That voice. That stupid voice.

He was a fool. Such a fool. He wasn't human. He didn't belong here. He never did. He couldn't be around her. Being around her only caused her to die. Every single damn time...

He was cursed. Just like Caleb claimed.

Zayne gasped, unable to breathe. The ice was constricting his neck, squeezing tighter and tighter. He had to release it...

The girl dropped her popsicles and started to sob. The high pitched wails bottomed out into a relentless ringing that pierced his eardrums.

"Zayne!" a voice cut through the fog.

He turned his head, but all he saw was a glimpse of silver. Squinting and blinking, Zayne was able to make out a man who vanished between the trees with a blinding flash of light. It might have been an illusion, but Zayne recognized him as the man who had sold the popsicles. Who was that…? How could he disappear into thin air?

Traveller.

"Zayne!" the voice shouted again, grabbing his shoulders. Zayne looked up and saw Caleb. Caleb. Where had he been?

But then Zayne saw something behind Caleb, growing bigger and bigger. A ripple in the sky.

"Watch out!" Zayne croaked.

And then he let go.

*****

"Zayne! Zayne!" voices brought him back into the light. Zayne fluttered his eyes. Something squished beneath him.

He was holding the girl in his arms. But her eyes were closed, and her pulse faint. Zayne shook her. "Wake... up..."

Please... don't leave me again...

It was his fault. It was all his fault.

He broke the rules...

"Zayne, calm down," a voice coughed. Caleb. He dragged himself to Zayne's side. Caleb tried tugging on his arm, but Zayne wouldn't budge. He only clung onto her even tighter, jerking his elbow back to fend Caleb off. Caleb paused, ice coating his hand. Had Zayne hit him, too? But Caleb lowered it, and it already seemed like his hand was... regenerating. Or was it... crystallizing? No, it must have been the trick of the light. His dreams messing with his mind. Caleb lowered his voice, "She's fine. I made sure I took the worst of it."

"We... we can't stop this," Zayne spoke, not looking at him. "As long as we're near each other, I will just..."

"Hey," Caleb said, his eyes widening. "No, no. Don't do that. She's fine, see? Nothing happened. It was just another explosion. I got us. We're okay. We can still be together. Don't... don't you dare back out now... you promised..."

Zayne gazed at Caleb. Why did he sound so... assured? Caleb's words were firm, but he had been anxious all day. And he had disappeared just before, arrived right on time. A crippling fear gripped his heart. "Did... you know?"

"What? No, I... it wasn't me..." Caleb shook his head, lifting his hands up.

But Zayne was already backing away.

"Zayne...?"

Caleb looked at him. His eyes looked like glass, shattering into a million pieces, each shard striking through Zayne's heart.

He didn't... he couldn't...

Caleb reached out for him, but Zayne revolted back, a wave of nausea hitting him. He saw it, the monster inside of him.

"No... don't you dare... Zayne!"

Caleb lurched forward, but a hoard of drones patrolling the area swarmed them, getting in his way. Their red dots flashed all over, signaling danger as screams filled the park, their electronic bleeps replacing the calm of nature.

"Coordinates..."

Footsteps pounded the dirt, as loud as thunder, crunching ice. Arms pulled Zayne from the pits, dragging him away from the girl. Zayne watched, as if he was simply just an outsider not part of his body, his fingers wrench from her flesh. So slow, yet so quick. The moment they were separated, it finally dawned on him that today was the final time he would see her after months of forced proximity.

Their wonderful game of pretend was officially over, the lie unraveled.

Zayne moved his gaze up. Caleb stood in the distance, surrounded by robots. Green and red clashed, piercing through the fall of hail, and the last thing he saw was the sun setting in Caleb's eyes.

White draped over Zayne, and his vision was blocked. Isolating him for good.

"Li Shen, oh Li Shen..." a voice said, pressing his head against her coat. His mother.

A noise wretched from his mouth. Cold dripped down his cheek. And that's when Zayne realized... he was crying.

He never cried before.

What an... odd sensation.

One last plea yelled in his ear. But Zayne closed his eyes, following his parents once again. Further away from Caleb. Further away from her. Just like that day. He was running once again. Except this time... there was no hope for reunion.

This is the way it should be. Caleb had been right. What they had was only a silly dream. The universe... would never let them be together. Opposites were never meant to attract. They were doomed from the start, destined to fight for dominance and snuff out her light. A tangly mess of strings.

"Zayne Li... you liar!" Caleb screamed at his back, the air further decreasing in pressure. "I won't forgive you! You hear me?"

"Shen... are you sure about this?" his mother rubbed his back.

"No, we knew this would've happened..." his father shook his head, cursing as he pushed through the chaotic crowd. "They weren't supposed to meet. We shouldn't have let you get too close... "

What was that even supposed to mean?

"We just thought for once... you could've lived a normal childhood," his mother whispered. "Everyone deserves that chance."

And he did. These past few months were the best in his life. He would always be grateful for it. But...

"I... I want to move next week," Zayne whispered.

His parents glanced at each other.

Zayne clenched his fists. It was time to grow up now, to wake up from the dream. Everything that went up always had to come down. Nothing lasted forever. This friendship...

He never should've clung onto hope.

Forbidden. That's what their relationship was. And always would be. As long as the universe continued to push against them.

"I'm here…" footsteps squeaked next to him, breath hitting his shoulder.

"Uh-huh," Caleb said mindlessly, his gaze still forward.

Zayne wiped his forehead, panting. "You've made me run faster than I've ever had in my life, just to get here in time, and that's all you have to say?"

"Good. You'll need the exercise for when the time comes," Caleb glanced at Zayne. "Now be quiet. You'll make me miss her."

"Blood hound," Zayne muttered under his breath. He straightened his back. "Do we need to go this far…?"

Caleb ignored him. Nothing was too far for her.

Zayne sighed. A few female students passed by, turning their heads at Caleb. They giggled. But still, he did not acknowledge them.

"You must be popular," Zayne remarked. "Although, I have no idea why."

"Caleb Xia! We have a score to settle!" a group of rowdy boys shouted at them from across the hall.

Zayne raised an eyebrow. "More fans of yours?"

"Who?" Caleb furrowed his brow, squinting at the door.

"Hey, we're talking to you!" a hand shoved Caleb's shoulder. "Or should we talk to your sister instead?"

Zayne eyes widened. "Hey—"

Caleb snatched the hand that touched him. He finally shifted his gaze, but his eyes were clouded over with storms. "Move it."

The boys froze.

"Are you deaf? Or do you want me to tell that teacher over there that you have Protocores on you?"

The boys scrambled.

"…Will you get in trouble?"

"Nah," Caleb shook his head. Josephine only told him to not get caught. And he made sure no one talked.

Besides… who would believe the golden boy could do such a thing? He was so obedient.

But most kids were too ashamed to admit they lost to the new weirdo. Or they suddenly got eager to be his friend, not wanting to upset him further. Word spread around, and the offers kept coming. He was drawing too much attention to himself.

He should really stop. But… a part of him thrived on it. And if it made her look up to him, too…

"Where did those kids find Protocores, anyways?" Zayne pondered. "The regulations have been getting stricter to protect against threats and smugglers."

"Rich and spoiled. Don't know, don't care," Caleb shrugged.

Zayne opened his mouth to say more, but the homeroom door finally opened, and a stream of students rushed into the hall. But somehow, among the crowd, only one person stood out.

Caleb's breath caught in his throat. Zayne gulped beside him.

The girl was talking to another student. She laughed at something the student said, turning her head. Her gaze landed on them. She smiled, waving them over.

The student beside her tapped her shoulder. Cupping their mouth, they leaned towards the girl and whispered in her ear.

"I miss our shelter…" Caleb mumbled. "At least then… I didn't have to worry about any interruptions."

"It's just a friend. At least it's not a boy, like we thought…" Zayne said, then gasped, a blush consuming his face. He tugged at his collar. "Which… shouldn't matter, either… Why are we doing this again?"

"That's not the point. It's one more person taking her away, when it was just supposed to be us…"

The girl pushed the student away, her forehead frowning down into a scowl. She marched towards Caleb and Zayne. The other student gave one last wave and a wink before disappearing back into the crowd.

"Zayne! What are you doing here?"

"Uh…" Zayne's eyes widened. He raised his hands, shielding himself from her. "It's my last day as well. I figured I'd surprise you."

Those were the lines they had rehearsed. Perhaps it would've been more believable, if he spoke louder. He always became a blubbering mess around her.

"You can't just show up whenever you want! You're like a magnet!"

Zayne blinked. "Huh?"

"I'm the one who hooked you! I'm not letting anyone—"

Caleb covered her mouth, muffling her next words. "Don't listen to a thing she says. She's just being ridiculous."

Caleb had been half-joking when he arranged for Zayne to come to their school. He knew enough about what general girls liked about guys to guess that Zayne would appeal to the eyes. He had an elegant air about him, an underlying warmth that wrapped everyone in a blanket. He was far more approachable than Caleb would ever be, even with that stoic expression, which only made people want to peel off those cold layers to get to the warmth. He hoped other girls would drive a wedge between her and Zayne. He had been serious about his revenge at least. But obviously, that back fired. He underestimated just how much she wanted him.

Oh, well. There would be more opportunities.

Just because he said they were friends didn't mean anything. He was just planning ahead. It's what he always did. If he got to Zayne first, she'd eventually give up… right?

"Gran wants us to stop at the store on the way home," Caleb removed his hand from the girl. "Let's go."

"Caleb Xia! Where do you think you're going? We need to talk…"

A group of boys in blue and white gym uniforms rushed at them. Zayne turned his gaze to Caleb. "Don't tell me…"

"Run," Caleb said, swinging the girl up on his back. They made a bolt for it.

*****

"Did we lose them?" Caleb asked. He hadn't even broken a sweat. His legs pumped with ease, toned from basketball practice. The one good thing about joining the sport.

"Yeah…" Zayne looked behind them, then glanced at Caleb's legs, frowning. "Thanks to your running. But… do you get into fights often? It seems like you have enemies everywhere."

"They're just jealous."

"We're used to it by now," the girl said. "The neighborhood bullies always chase after us. But Caleb, do you seriously need to carry me?"

Caleb tightened his grip on her legs. "But you like piggyback rides."

"I can run on my own!" the girl whined, hitting his back with her fists.

Caleb winced, setting her down. They fell into a leisurely walk.

Caleb and Zayne hung behind as the girl took the lead.

"…Are you getting the hang of it?" Zayne tilted his head. "Embracing the role of her older brother?"

Was he? It didn't feel like he was doing anything special. And did it qualify if she always rejected him? But… that was all he could do, all he had to cling on.

Caleb glanced at the girl. "Yeah… so don't go taking my spot."

"…You're not going to tell her anything?" Zayne whispered. "Doesn't she deserve to know what's going on?"

"Would you actually tell her?" Caleb snapped. "Yapping your mouth is what gets you killed. If that's all you're gonna do, then stay out of my way. I can't cover your butt if you screw up. I hate improvising."

"Are you… worried about me, Caleb?" Zayne leaned forward. Their shoulders brushed. When had they gotten so close?

Caleb blinked. That was preposterous. "Hell no."

Zayne smiled. "If you say so. But… should we really not tell anyone? What if she finds out and gets upset?"

"Don't act like you know her better than I do. No one knows her better than me. I'm her brother. I'll always be first—so remember that," Caleb looked away. "We can't tell her anything. She must never know. Not even anyone else. We take this secret to our graves. That's the price we paid. You're about to find out just how far we need to go for her. We have to always be one step ahead if we want a chance at winning this."

Yes. This was going to be the last time. He was sure of it.

Then when he was gone—

"But doesn't it get tiring? The act?" Zayne shook his head. "You should at least tell someone your secrets."

"Are you volunteering?"

Zayne smiled. "Perhaps. Want me to be your big brother, Caleb?"

Caleb cringed. "Get lost."

But… it felt nice, not having to shoulder everything on his own. The girl saw him, but… she only saw the version he wanted her to see. The good that he made everyone else believe. Zayne saw right through his act, though. He had since the beginning. He didn't need to pretend for Zayne. Didn't have to split himself into two. At some point… the girl wasn't the only one who could pull him from the darkness, as much as he didn't want to admit it. They both hung onto his arms, keeping him grounded so he wouldn't fly too far away. Without realizing it, they had become his gravity.

And perhaps… the envious gaze he sometimes caught Zayne having towards them wasn't just for the girl, but for their bond in general… Zayne was an only child. Did he wish he had a sibling to care for?

The girl stopped in front of them. She swung around. "You and Zayne have been super close lately… what are you two keeping from me?”

“You and Zayne have secrets too. But I can’t have any with him?” Caleb accused.

“That’s… well, I always tell you mine in the end because you demand them!” she stomped her foot. "I know you think I'm unaware… but I know something is up! Why can't you tell me?"

It was true. She always had a crazy sixth sense for reading people and picking up tension. And she was just as always good at defusing it. If his super power was finding her, hers was that. She masked her grim reality by forcing out a perky personality. That's how she always managed to tame Caleb when he got into one of his moods. And in turn, only Caleb ever got to see those gloomy bits when she could no longer hide it.

It was exactly why all of this was so risky. One day… she'll find out everything. And their world will crumble.

But she couldn't find out. Not yet. She'd jeopardize everything with her emotions, her face that could be read as an open book. She would just rush into things when they needed to take it slow. So… she needed to rely on them, just for a little longer.

“Well, I’m older than you. The oldest needs to maintain some degree of privacy that the youngest isn’t privy too," Caleb crossed his arms.

“You’re so unfair!” 

"I don't make the rules, Pip-squeak. That's just how it is."

"Xia Yizhou! Stop hiding behind that excuse!" she pointed a finger at him, eyes narrowed.

“Do you two ever stop arguing?” Zayne pinched the bridge of his nose.

“When no one else is around or involved," Caleb bit back. Yeah… the arguments only ever really started whenever Zayne was around, didn't they?

They finally reached the store. Caleb pushed open the door. It was just a small, local grocery store. Caleb thought it must have been one of the town's hidden gems, with how unique it was compared to other stores: hard-to-get niche brands, memboralia, and his personal favorite—

"Caleb, there's a garden behind this small store! Can you believe it? Look, these hydrangeas are so pretty," the girl gushed.

The back of the store ended in a stone arch that led out to bright, dusky light. It reminded him of an old chapel. Seeing something like this was rare in a world constantly growing with technology. Leaning over her pointed hand, his eyes adjusted to the light and made way to a garden filled with blues and violets. "Oh, I remember this particular species is called... endless summer."

"Huh? That's a weird name," the girl frowned.

"It's probably because the flower blooms for a long time. The name represents everyone's wish for a never-ending summer," Caleb whispered.

He may or may not have studied up on flowers… he couldn't have Zayne being more impressive than he was, after all.

Zayne stared hard at the flowers. "Never-ending summer…"

"Something wrong?"

"No, it's just…" Zayne shook his head. He smiled. "I hope we have a never-ending summer."

That was the most irrational thing he had ever heard from the stoic guy. The summer had just begun, but everything always came to an end. Nothing lasted forever. Nothing was strong enough to survive the end. But Caleb found himself nodding. "Yeah… me too."

He was the biggest hypocrite ever, because… he didn't want these days to end. He didn't want to lose anyone again.

As the girl tugged Zayne away, whispering in his ear, Caleb wandered into the garden, following along the smooth stone wall that extended from the store, dragging his hand across the surface. He stopped in front of a batch of endless summers. There was blue, purple… and a single white, growing different among the rest. Glancing back at the store, Caleb plucked each color.

"The more you have… the more you lose," a voice slithered into his ear, circling his neck. Caleb froze. He straightened up, the flowers wiggling in his hand.

"Don't lose focus. I trust you'll know what to do," a hand caressed his right shoulder, like a phantom. There and gone. Caleb looked. No one was there. An illusion.

Yet… the ropes tightening around his body felt very real. He clutched his neck, gasping as his vision narrowed. His sin… it was too much. He shook his head, swinging his arms, as if that would release the grasp.

He steadied his feet. Taking a deep breath, Caleb waltzed into the store again, ignoring the glare of the red eye at his back.

His steps faltered.

The girl was standing on her tip toes by the bookshelves. Her hands could barely reach the second shelf. Caleb took a step forward—

Zayne appeared behind her, his hand grabbing the book she had been looking for. When he turned back, his chin was close enough to bump her forehead. The both of them froze, as if stuck in time, their eyes meeting in a coy dance.

They looked… good, without him. Zayne obviously would've been the better choice.

Caleb clenched the flowers in his hand, his head buzzing. He strided over. "Are we ready to go?"

They both turned to him. Their faces flushed, guilty as charged. Zayne cleared his throat. "Everything alright? You look pale."

"Because I just saw something inappropriate," Caleb muttered. He glared at Zayne, pulling the girl away from him.

Zayne frowned. His eyes flickered to the garden. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"Peachy," Caleb said.

"What's that over there?" the girl moved to another shelf. She picked up a box with bright, bold colors mushed together—a flashy, ugly design. "Quirky?"

"Looks like candy. Want to try one?" Caleb sauntered over, leaving Zayne behind. "You might like it."

"I… would also like to try one," Zayne finally caught up, accepting the change in subject. Caleb took the box from her, giving them each a small wrapped candy. He read the box as they both popped one into their mouths.

Their faces simultaneously twisted.

"Bleh," the girl coughed, holding her throat. "What flavor is this? Caleb, you tricked us!"

"It tastes like… burnt toast," Zayne winced.

"That's better than mine…" the girl mumbled.

"You two just got unlucky. How could I possibly have known? At least you two were brave enough to grab them, not knowing what they were. That's an accomplishment," Caleb laughed. Finally, some proper revenge. "Hardly any of these ever get sold. They are notorious for their awful flavors. But sometimes you can get one that tastes good. They're all unique flavors."

From the corner of his eye, Caleb spotted the newest model plane kit he had been wanting. He picked it out, then headed to the register.

After wrapping up their shopping, they headed back home.

*****

The house was within their sights. Their steps slowed. Caleb wobbled.

"Gege, are you okay?" the girl rushed to his side, holding him up. He smiled at her.

"Yeah… it's been a while since you've called me that," Caleb sighed, leaning against her. He just had to keep remembering why he was doing all this. And then it would be all okay.

"I bet it's because his leg is killing him," Zayne mumbled. He shook the bag he paid for separately. "I bought some first aid stuff. I'll disinfect your wound. You shouldn't be exerting it so much."

Caleb groaned. "My leg is fine."

"You scraped it. Did you not notice?" Zayne shook his head. "I'm not interested in how you did it. Just let me help."

"Gege, how long ago did that happen?" the girl gazed at him with droopy eyes.

"…I saw it back when we were running," Zayne cleared his throat. "He probably got into another fight without us knowing."

"I'm the worst. I couldn't tell," the girl bit her lip.

"It's not your fault, Pip-squeak," he ruffled her hair.

"That's right. It's Caleb's for being a dummy," Zayne noted wisely. Caleb scowled.

They trudged up the steps.

A bark broke their squabbling, and they parted ways as a dog leaped up the stairs and jumped at the girl.

Caleb reached out, grabbing the dog by the scruff of its neck.

"Wait! Caleb, that's my friend!"

Caleb and Zayne froze. Caleb was so shocked that his fingers slipped through the red coat and the dog barreled towards the girl again.

"A… stray?" Caleb blinked. "What about that girl?"

"Huh?" she frowned. "Which girl?"

"Never mind," Zayne grabbed Caleb's shoulder, holding him back. His shoulders shook, a chuckle threatening to escape. Caleb glared at him, and he covered it with a cough. "Who's this little guy?"

Little? The dog growled at him, revealing sharp teeth. Yeah, he was "little," alright.

"I don't know," the girl pinched her chin. "He just showed up one day. I feed him sometimes."

"How did I not know this?" Caleb frowned. "And what about our kitten? Cats and dogs don't get along. If you keep feeding the dog, it will never leave. It's not safe."

"You never showed any interest until now. And it's fine. He never goes inside," the girl rolled her eyes. "I snuck some bread from the cafeteria. Want to help me feed him?"

The dog whimpered, its golden eyes glistening.

"…I've never seen such an expression before," Zayne mumbled. He sidled next to the girl, cupping out his hand. She poured the bread crumbs into his palm. But when he approached the dog, the dog cowered back, snarling at them. Zayne slumped his shoulders.

"Don't worry, Zayne! This one is very fickle. When I first found him, he was injured, so I think he still has some trust issues. He hasn't even fully warmed up to me yet," the girl glared at the dog, putting her hands on her hips. "He may be familiar with me, but he keeps a moderate distance. I've never even seen him wag his tail."

Now that Caleb was getting a closer look, the dog really did seem huge. What if there was something wrong with it?

"Is it rapid? Maybe it should be put on a leash instead," Caleb said. "A dog needs an owner, or it'll never trust anyone again."

Caleb dug his hands in the dog's rich red fur, scratching it behind the ears.

The dog paused, giving a little whine. Then its fluffy red tail began to wag, and it rolled onto its back, baring its stomach.

The girl sighed. "I should've known. Caleb always has a way of animals. I guess Zayne is too scary."

"Like recognizes like," Zayne pushed up his glasses. Caleb threw him a look. He snatched the crumbs from his hand, feeding it to the dog as he rubbed its belly. It gently lapped at his palm.

Caleb leaned towards the dog, whispering in its floppy red ear. "That's right. You only come to me."

An animal friend was still a friend. He wasn't going to be replaced by a literal dog, of all things. Especially one that wasn't tamed and could attack at any moment. He needed to ensure its loyalty before anyone else.

A shudder went through the dog's body as though it understood him, giving Caleb a cautious side glance. It huffed in response, giving a short bark. After trotting in a circle, and one last lingering glance at the girl, it disappeared into the bushes.

Opening the door, they all settled inside the house. Zayne pulled out a chair from the table. He gestured to the seat. "Come on, Caleb. It's bleeding. You must have reopened it when you were running. It'll get infected if we don't take care of it right away."

"Yeah, yeah," Caleb waved his hand, sitting on the chair with a huff.

"…Thank you," Zayne whispered, kneeling at his feet, dabbing a washcloth with some water. He pressed it to his injured knee. "Why do you hate hospitals?"

"It's… too white," Caleb mumbled. Perhaps it should have stung, but he felt no pain. Zayne always had that effect on him. Caleb closed his eyes, letting the tranquility sift through his aching bones as Zayne treated his knee with a well practiced hand. Zayne's special skill. Usually it irritated him, felt intrusive, but… just for today, he welcomed it. Maybe he didn't always need to feel the pain and suffering. "Full of misery. Just be glad I'm letting you do this much. Don't get used to it."

It was only because she was worried about him, and he wanted to forget about the house he was in.

Zayne smiled. He had been doing that a lot more lately, hadn't he? A true expert who surpassed the master. It was distracting. "Should've eaten an apple."

As Zayne peeled the bandaid off the paper and rubbed it on his knee, the door opened again. Caleb's face fell, the tranquility broken.

"Oh, Zayne is here! How wonderful!" Josephine exclaimed. "You should've told me."

"It wasn't important," Caleb jerked his knee away, hopping off the chair.

"Well… I think it is," Josephine placed her hands on her hips. "Since he's here, I think now's a good idea to measure all of your heights. It looks like you all have had growth spurts."

Caleb scrunched his nose. "But why does Zayne need to be measured?"

"Because he's your friend," Josephine pointed out. "And don't you want something to remember Zayne by?"

The girl's eyes sparkled. "Yes! That's a good idea! We can do it from now on."

Caleb sucked in a breath. No. He didn't want anything to remember him by. Why did the woman always have to interfere?

But everything was already moving along, and he couldn't tell the girl no when she looked at him like that.

They each stood side by side. Josephine carved their heights onto the wall. Once done, the girl grabbed the marker and wrote "Zayne" under his line.

"That way, I'll never forget," she whispered. Zayne smiled at her. Caleb's heart twisted once again.

Zayne was the tallest. Was that what the girl liked? Caleb would be even taller than him one day. He'd make sure of it.

"You're still so short, Pip-squeak," Caleb remarked. "You can't even reach Zayne's line on your tip toes."

"Hey! I'm getting taller just like you! One day I'll catch up."

"I told you before, I'm the oldest. I'll always be taller than you. That's just how it is."

Yes, the girl was still always be behind him. They'll never truly be on the same level or see eye to eye.

But… seeing her grow up before him was unsettling. Back at the shelter, when they measured their heights… they first started with the elephant slide. But since the elephant slide was toppled over and not in tact, progress was limited. Insisting that was the reason why she wasn't growing any taller, they started measuring their heights on the tree instead. It was impossible to grow so much in a week, but Caleb indulged her, always putting the line above her head, a little bit higher each time, to satisfy her. Their whole relationship had always been built on secrets and lies.

But… time was truly progressing now. And it went by fast. Multiple seasons have passed, and Caleb didn't need to lie about her height anymore. She was growing up on her own. And she would keep growing. Until one day… this will all end.

"You three sit down while I'll make dinner," Josephine said, taking the marker from the girl. "To celebrate your last day of school."

"Let's make a fort!" the girl yelled. "We can watch TV and eat."

A few minutes later, they were all sitting underneath a temple of chairs draped with blankets, the TV on.

Caleb snuck two cans of soda from the fridge. Josephine had forbid them from having soda, something about being too young for that much sugar, but the girl always wanted to try it. He popped the lid and slid it to her. She gleefully took a sip, then handed it back to Caleb. Caleb took a sip of his own.

Zayne flinched. "That's not sanitary."

Caleb stared at Zayne as he sipped from the can. "Just drink yours then."

The TV flashed. The girl took back the can and pressed a finger to her lips, hushing them. "Ta-ta's Perfect Vacation is on!"

The opening sequence started with a shot of a plane flying over an island. The girl awed at it. "Look at the plane on TV! It's so cool. It flies really fast and zooms past the clouds."

Caleb squinted, his hands working on the model kit he just got. "It's the FY-26. Do you like it? I'll be piloting that plane in the future."

"That's some clever DAA advertising," Zayne mumbled. His can crackled as he sipped from his soda, probably using his Evol to keep it cold.

The girl frowned, tugging on Caleb's sleeve. "Will it take you away? Like swoosh and you're gone?"

"You're so silly, Pip-squeak. I'll bring you with me. We'll fly wherever and whenever you want," Caleb plucked at her fingers. "Just like I've always promised. Did you forget again?"

"Where would you even go?" Zayne asked.

"Hm… I want to go to…" she changed her gaze to the TV, pointing at the screen. "There! Cloudia Island! The perfect vacation!"

"Cloudia Island? It's just a TV show though," Zayne frowned. "It's not realistic."

"Who needs reality when you have your imagination?" Caleb said.

"…Imagination?" Zayne shook his head. "But what's so great about a fantasy that can never happen? Just make it into reality. Why pretend when actions are better than words?"

Ridiculous. Why should he turn to reality when it was always disappointing, when he already knew it could never deliver? Fantasies were harmless. Fantasies were limitless.

"You get used to the impossible with her. She once asked me to make 1,000 paper cranes for her."

"Which you still haven't done!" the girl sang-sung. "Zayne has a point! Let's go, let's go!"

"Should I help plan out the agenda?" Zayne offered.

Caleb looked at them. He listened to the TV drone on as Zayne and the girl planned out the trip. Was… making something real, truly so wrong? If they could actually make it happen, then… He fisted his hands. “Yeah… should we make another promise then? That we’ll always be together like this, even in the future. Nothing will tear us apart, and we’ll find a way to overcome all our problems and live in our paradise.”

No. It won’t matter… the world will end soon.

Dreams… would always stay dreams.

But if they stay dreams… then he could continue having these forbidden thoughts.

“Let’s pinky swear it this time… that we’ll always be friends, and nothing will pull us apart," the girl whispered with reverence, her eyes filled with longing. Caleb and Zayne glanced at each other.

They lifted their hands, giving their life to her and each other. They swore it, their pinkies entwined.

Even though… Caleb and Zayne knew better.

But that was all just part of the act, right?

Still… Caleb found himself wanting… just for once… for nothing to be an act.

Right before Zayne left, Caleb grabbed the flowers he had picked.

"Here," Caleb thrusted the blue flower at Zayne, and the white flower at the girl. "With these… nothing will change between us. Right?"

"Flowers always fall apart with time…" Zayne took the flower. He stared at the white one in the girl's hands. He smiled. They really have been rubbing off on him. "But… I'll take good care of it."

Was he talking about the flower or the girl?

His father had been called to work. When Zayne finally peeked his head out of his room, the house was empty. And he was still stuck a mess, with her due at any minute.

He smoothed down the wrinkles of his shirt once more.

The doorbell rang. He shot up from his chair, the force of it causing the chair to fall on its side. Cursing, Zayne quickly repositioned it. Petting his bangs, he shook his tie one final time and hurtled for the door. Holding his breath, he opened it.

And immediately let the breath out.

“Hi, Zayne!” the girl waved at him.

“‘Sup,” Caleb scanned Zayne up and down. “You’re still in uniform?”

The siblings were still wearing uniforms as well, but unlike him, they had an excuse. Caleb had basketball practice, something about being an athlete prodigy, and the girl said she'd come over when it ended. But Zayne didn't think that meant so would Caleb.

Zayne pressed himself closer to the door, heat rushing to his face. “What are you doing here?”

He was suddenly and fully aware that he had been paranoid about his appearance in front of her.

“Was the invitation not extended towards me? I’m hurt,” Caleb gasped. His hand clasped on the door, preventing Zayne from closing it all the way. “But I just had to come. Someone should supervise.”

Bullcrap. He just didn’t want them alone together. Zayne narrowed his eyes.

Wait. Why did he even care so much? What had he been expecting? Zayne turned on his heel, going back into his house without a word.

The two followed him inside. Caleb wandered over to a dresser with photo frames stacked on top. He picked one up, examining a toddler Zayne in a penguin suit, waddling after a real penguin in the snow. Zayne snatched the photo from him, putting it back down. Cackling, Caleb turned his gaze, his eye catching the garden outside. Various flowers draped the yard. He scrunched his nose. “So much… color.”

“My mom’s hobby,” Zayne cleared his throat. “She swears it drives all the negative emotions away, when she has a bad day at work. She collects seeds from all the countries she visits.”

“Does that mean you know a lot about flowers, Zayne?” the girl stood on her tip toes, poking her head between their shoulders. “What flower do you think I’d be?”

Zayne didn't actually know that much. He never understood the allure of flowers. They were just an extension of nature, fleeting yet abundant, and putting meaning behind any of it was a strange activity he had no interest in participating. But if he had to choose—

“…Jasmine.”

“What? I didn’t hear you.”

Zayne coughed. “Jasmine. You have a very rich, sweet scent that reminds me of one. Like a breath of fresh air."

The girl scrunched her nose. It was almost identical to Caleb. “I do?”

She lifted up her arm and sniffed. “But I don’t smell anything.”

“What kind of lame answer is that? Asiatic apples are cooler,” Caleb pushed her arm down. “Always bringing different colors to boring landscapes. Like apples in a dry garden. Safe and comforting."

“Asiatic apples?” Zayne frowned. “The weeping flowers? I thought they represented sadness and parting.”

“Only if you will it. The flowers may be sad, but they’re never alone, are they?"

Zayne studied them.

Last night, he had another peculiar dream. In this dream, there were several golden threads, but only one stood out to him. When he snatched it, he was led to a forest. The forest was filled with wilting flowers.

Zayne fixed his gaze back to the garden. “…The topmost bloom is the lowest point. Looking at it that way, the other blooms are… shielding the flower. Or desperate to reach after her. The flowers fall, but they are always reborn, in different places and different times. Nothing changes.”

Caleb turned white, as if he saw a ghost.

Zayne closed his eyes. "Why not… a Bingdi lotus instead?"

When Zayne followed the path of the fallen petals in his dream, he found himself at a lake. Peering down, a strange flower he had never seen before floated to him. But when he went to touch it, it vanished—as if he was never meant to look. A dream warning him to not pry where he cannot belong.

He had researched the flower as soon as he woke up.

Caleb never left the girl's side. Their bond was strong. When Zayne looked at them, he felt like one of the 100,000 flowers who grew alone, watching the lucky stem blossom the two buds.

Caleb blinked at him, his brow furrowing in confusion, his eyes flickering. “What…?”

“I saw it in a dream,” he amended.

“You… have dreams like that?” Caleb swayed, then shook his head. “I thought it was your awful attempt at poetry.”

“Doesn't everyone?" Zayne diverted the subject. "Do… you have dreams?”

“Sometimes. Nightmares,” Caleb said slowly. "Not images. Voices. Senses."

“I have nightmares too,” the girl piped up. “But I never remember them. They feel so far away."

Zayne hadn't been expecting any answers. He assumed he alone was suffering from this phenomenon. But… maybe he wasn't as alone as he thought he was.

“Guess that makes us all weird then,” Caleb mumbled.

“Do you… believe in reincarnation?” Zayne whispered. “I’ve been reading books. Some theories suggest dreams are portals to other lives.”

“A bunch of hogwash,” Caleb scoffed. He gnawed at his lip. “But… maybe there is something more. Who knows. Pilots discover something new in the tunnel everyday. I believe in possibilities."

“Yeah… I’m not one to believe in stuff like that either,” Zayne moved away, heading into the dining room. “Well, that’s not what we’re here for.”

Caleb spotted something else in the corner. "Is that… an electronic keyboard?”

"Zayne, you play instruments?" the girl squealed.

"No, I—"

"I bet he doesn't know anything beyond hot cross buns," Caleb smirked. "Just look at the dust on that thing."

"Anyways!" Zayne shouted over them. "I'm supposed to tutor you, not chit-chat."

Finally regaining their attention, Zayne had them sit at the table.

As the girl went through her book bag to pull out her homework for each subject, Zayne turned to Caleb.

"I don't get it. If you're so suspicious of me, how come you never tutor her?"

"There's a reason," Caleb leaned back in his chair casually, steepling his fingers on top his stomach. "You'll find out."

Zayne furrowed his brow. But a few minutes later, he was beginning to see why.

"No, you don't do that—"

"Ugh!" the girl threw down her pencil, pushing her chair back. "It's too hard. I give up!"

Zayne pressed the heel of his hands down on his eyes, his glasses askew, as he dragged out a sigh. It was like wrangling toddlers who threw tantrums at the hospital.

"Warned you," Caleb shook his head. "Unteachable. She doesn't understand a thing you say unless it has to do with hunting Wanderers."

Zayne swung his glasses back down on his face, jaw clenched. "No one is unteachable. It's just about finding the right method. We can keep trying—"

"Please, no more," the girl whined.

"There's a difference between being a genius and being an instructor," Caleb pointed out. "The two aren't mutually exclusive. And geniuses can't cure the stupid."

"Hey! I'm not stupid!" the girl slammed her hands on the table. "Just you wait, Caleb… I'll show you!"

"Pip-squeak, do you even know what the word 'Borborygmi' means?"

The girl blinked. "O-of course I do! It… it means... Uh…"

Caleb laughed, bending forwards, his hands holding his stomach.

"Caleb… don't be cruel," Zayne scolded, but he looked away, the corners of his own lips pulling up. He struggled to clamp his mouth shut.

"Hey, that's not fair! That's a big word! And it has nothing to do with third grade! What kind of word is that anyways? A foreign language?"

"It's the medical term for stomach growling," Zayne cleared his throat. "But I agree. I'm surprised Caleb knows that word, considering his fear of hospitals."

"Of course I know that word. Her stomach growls all the time. How can I not?"

Zayne slammed a fist over his chest.

"Make fun of me all you want. But Caleb is just as much of a dummy as I am. That's why he's still stuck in sixth grade instead of skipping ahead like Zayne."

"As if I even want to be like Zayne," Caleb shuddered.

"Yes, I've been meaning to ask that," Zayne closed his book. "Your intelligence is almost on par with mine. Yet, you haven't skipped a grade."

Caleb coughed. "Well, if I skip a grade, I'd have to go to another school, won't I? But I can't just leave her alone. She wouldn't survive without me. So, I stay behind, for her sake."

"That's not true! Caleb is top of his class, and he has excellent skills, but… he has a dense streak."

"Don't confuse me with yourself, Pip-squeak."

"Come on, be honest. You hate reading long blocks of text, so you don't do any homework that has it. Sometimes you don't follow instructions and do things your way instead of what the teacher wants. You keep getting penalties in basketball. Not to mention, you sneak out of class to check up on me, which has gotten you scolded several times. You only have not gotten expelled yet because Grandma pays everybody off."

"I understand pictures, not boring lines. And why should I have to follow archaeic methods when my modern methods are much more efficient? Rules are just a construct," Caleb listed each point off his hand. Then he paused, glancing at Zayne, that familiar gleam swirling in his eyes. He stared pointedly at the girl. "And I'm not the only one who skips class."

"Ahem. That's not the point," the girl cleared her throat.

Zayne blinked. "You… ditch?"

Her eyes widened, turning to Zayne. "Oh, no! Zayne, he's just exaggerating! I promise I don't actually skip…"

Caleb smirked, shrugging. "You always beg me to take you out for ice cream instead of taking a test."

The girl kicked Caleb's leg. She hissed, "Caleb! That was supposed to be a secret!"

"Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot you wanted to seem studious in front of him," Caleb sighed. "Oh, well. It's not like we'll ever be on his level anyway. Clearly we're not cut out to be in the same classes. Guess he doesn't want to hang out with us anymore since we're not as oriented as him. Let's go, Pip-squeak."

Caleb urged her to get up, pushing her towards the door. A coldness washed over Zayne. He shot up from his seat. He took two long strides before he was around the table, clutching on the girl's arm, pulling her towards him. Caleb let out a growl, tugging her back.

"Caleb Xia. Just where do you think you're going with my pupil? We're not finished with the tutoring session. Sit back down," Zayne pulled away, looking Caleb up and down. "And for the record, I don't care what you do with yourselves. It's none of my business, and it's not like I'm the one ditching school."

Caleb ground his teeth. "Great."

"Although," Zayne said, pushing up his glasses. "You'd certainly never pass the character or psychological evaluations at the Aerospace Academy."

"Why would I need to pass that? My skill alone is enough."

Zayne sighed. "Just sit back down. And stop trying to distract us. I know what you're doing."

They sat back at the table. The rest of the tutoring session went smoothly, and by the end, the girl was complaining about hunger.

"I've exhausted all my energy on those questions," the girl slumped over the table.

Zayne looked outside. "It's getting late. But I can maybe make something…"

Caleb stood up. "I'll help. Let's go to the garden. You got a lot of vegetables and fruits in there, yeah?"

Zayne nodded. "But… I was thinking ice cream…"

"Is this your sweet tooth talking?"

"No. But you take her out for ice cream whenever she wants a break from school."

Was… that too obvious?

Caleb hummed. "Then… apple ice cream."

Zayne scrunched his nose. "Apple? Why? And how?"

"Because apples are tradition. And I've been exploring recipes," Caleb tugged on Zayne's arm. "She's asleep. We can also talk."

*****

Caleb and Zayne sat underneath the tree. The sun was setting, casting the yard into a sea of oranges and reds. The cicadas clacked their wings together while a woodpecker drilled into the tree above them.

Caleb used his Evol to lower the apples after Zayne warned him to not disturb the bird.

Zayne grabbed knives, showing Caleb how to skin the apple. They quietly shaved off red clippings.

"So…why do you like apples so much?"

"It's always been our thing. For as long as I can remember, she would give me offerings. At the shelter, we had nothing. But we talked about what we could get from outside. So I snuck an apple from the kitchen… to pay her back. That place was dull, but a single apple was enough to brighten it up," Caleb lifted his apple, turning it under the glow of the sun. "It stuck. Now she associates me with apples. Whenever we make a silly promise about what we want to do in the future, we eat apples to seal the deal."

Zayne looked down, squeezing his apple. "Some say apples symbolize forbidden knowledge."

Caleb gazed at Zayne, setting aside his apple. "Right. We need to talk. Before I forget."

"How did you know?" Zayne blurted out. "That he had a Protocore. Did you see something?"

"'See'?" Caleb blinked. Then laughed. "I don't see anything. I have a hard time seeing the differences between people. It's more like… a hazy fog. But I can feel. And some people feel more threatening than others. I've said before, I just have good gut instincts."

So, it wasn't the same sight Zayne occasionally experienced. Caleb… wasn't like Zayne. Zayne ignored the disappointment, slicing off a shaving. "You have… Prosopagnoisa? But you can see her just fine."

He couldn't have mistaken all the times Caleb deliberately sought her out. He always knew where to look. Like a compass.

"No… I just don't care enough to pay attention to others," Caleb said. "I don't like other people. They're all just faceless beasts to me. Pip-squeak says I have a problem. But if I actually try hard, I can see differences."

Well, that didn't help.

"Then what do you see when you look at me?"

Does he see who I really am, as well? Of course Caleb did. That's why Caleb hated him.

Caleb squinted, pretending to think. "Hm… green."

"Green?" Zayne didn't see green. He only saw black.

"Yeah… like a pear."

Zayne squeezed his eyes shut. "Not that again."

"Can you blame me? You're so gullible," Caleb pushed his shoulder. His face hardened. "Protocores…I think they're the answer."

"We've already discussed this. Protocores are the cause of this mess. It can't result in anything good."

"But are they really to blame? That guy had a point. Protocores aren't much different from Evols," Caleb frowned. "No, they can even do more than Evols… they're raw magic. If there's one out there that can save her… then I'll do whatever it takes to find it. We just gotta follow EVER's movements."

"We're just kids… how do we go about that?"

"We're not just kids," Caleb mumbled. “Don't you know by now? They’re after us because we’re not normal. We’re the special ones. We're loners, outcasted by society, which makes us perfect targets. And apparently… there’s more like us out there."

Zayne remembered the day before. The strange man who appeared and disappeared. “Are there… any obstacles to their plan? I imagine they have many enemies. Why not leave it to them?”

“We can’t wait that long,” Caleb shook his head. “And if they truly were, then they would’ve done something by now instead of just sitting on their high horses and watching us suffer, don’t you think?”

“Maybe they’re closer than we think. Blending in with the crowd… from other worlds, even. Wouldn’t that make sense? The DAA says there are signs of life beyond the tunnel.”

“Like aliens?” Caleb laughed. “Well, blending in has its perks… we’re gonna have to exploit from the inside, just like how they’re exploiting us.”

"…What if we fail? What if we can't stop what's happening? And then she—"

The air around them stirred. A vicious look entered Caleb's gaze. It almost felt like the black holes were extending beyond his eyes. "I won't let them. They think we're just a means to an end. Everyone looks down on us. They're not different from the bullies at school. But I'm going to show them. Show them that they can't mess with us. That we're not less—"

Zayne grabbed Caleb by the shoulders. His apple fell to the ground and rolled away. "Caleb, calm down."

Zayne noticed a pattern. Caleb lost control of his Evol whenever his negative emotions overwhelmed him. It got worse whenever he was in contact with the girl—a result of her own Evol, which could amplify and repel other Evols. But Caleb always held back, only spiraling when he was away from her, when his body couldn't take it anymore. His unconscious way of protecting her, probably.

…Just like that day. Zayne had felt it then, too. His Evol spiraling out of control. His power had been tugged out against his will, a single spark created by a point of unusual contact, until it burst.

That was the nature of the girl's Evol. Her resonance called out to them, begging to be released, wanting nothing but destruction. A gnawing hunger.

Was that what EVER was looking for? Children who could… channel that sort of energy? But for what purpose? And how did it relate to the Tunnel, the start of it all?

Zayne let out a breath, flakes of frost falling over Caleb. He could feel his own Evol losing it, the ice popping over his arms and neck. His vision was tunneling. But he pushed through. No. Not yet.

He trickled his Evol into Caleb. Just a little bit. The wind stilled, and Caleb's eyes went back to normal. Zayne's vision expanded, and the pressure was gone.

Caleb glared at Zayne, shrugging him off. "I hate that. That… calming effect of yours. It's creepy. I never asked for it."

Zayne blinked. "Calming… effect? I calm you?"

"No, you don't calm me. You piss me off," Caleb shoved him away. "I don't understand what she sees in you. Why she feels so relaxed around you. When I can only…"

"Doesn't she feel more relaxed around you than me?" Zayne tilted his head.

"No, it's different with you. She…" he gestured around his face. "Gets all like that."

Is she sick? Maybe she was still nervous around him. Zayne furrowed his brow. "I'm sure it'll pass. It's just a phase. She'll move on by the time summer comes rolling around."

When I'm gone. His heart twisted. Yes, she would forget him again.

"Just a phase? No, you don't get it," Caleb shook his head. He gulped, then picked up his apple. "Nevermind. Keep that to yourself. I guess… it can be useful at times."

"Useful?" Zayne didn't like the calculative look in Caleb's eyes, analyzing his worth.

"You're gonna be a doctor, aren't you?" Caleb gestured at him with the apple. "But I don't plan on making doctor visits to you. Just so you know. And once she gets better…"

"Then stop being reckless."

"Don't worry. I'm cursed to live. I can't die. Not before I prove myself."

There he went again, acting mysterious. Caleb often had these weird bouts… like he knew more than he was letting on, like he was thousands of years old instead of eleven. "Why do you need me anyways? I thought you didn't want any help. I thought you hated me."

Caleb clipped at his apple. "Well… I figured out, people like us… we can get lonely. And… if anything happens—"

His next words were drowned out by the wind. The screen door slammed open, and the girl came rushing out.

"You guys were hanging without me?"

"You were asleep, Pip-squeak," Caleb said, reaching out for her, forgetting about Zayne. "We didn't want to wake you."

"Zayne, your parents are back," the girl said, twisting in Caleb's grip to look at him. "They said they'll show us more pictures!"

Oh no. Zayne paled.

*****

"Is that why you hate carrots?" Caleb smirked. "So would I, if I had to wear that every day."

Zayne groaned. "Mom…"

She was showing them pictures of his childhood. Pictures of when his parents had forced him to wear an oversized hoodie with an angry carrot design for his first few years at school. The girl was particularly obsessed with a photo of when he was five.

"Aw, look at Zaynie and his cute little cat paws!" she gushed. "Can you make the same pose?"

Zayne scowled. "No."

"…You really are just like a black cat," she huffed.

"This one is my favorite," his mother sighed. "Two years ago, Zayne and his father went to a pumpkin patch for some father-son bonding time. They haven't been as close lately…"

The girl peeked at the phone. "I wanted to ask… why is Mr. Ju an orange on your phone?"

"Oh…that's an inside joke. Jace's Chinese name means orange," Zayne's mother chuckled.

"Just like how Li means pear? A family of fruit?" Caleb asked smugly. Zayne rolled his eyes. Caleb continued, "Why is Zayne's surname Li anyway? Shouldn't it be Ju?"

"Well… you two don't have the same surname. It's something like that," his mother finally turned off the phone. "It was more-so a coincidence that my surname was the same as Zayne's. Although we always keep it simple and just say I'm the moneymaker in this household."

"Don't disagree with her on that one," Zayne's father laughed.

Zayne looked at his parents. Seeing the photos, and how his parents used to be younger… they really have given up a lot to raise him. And who knew how much more time he had left? As the days passed by, and the seasons changed… it was getting closer to the deadline, the deadline where he would lose everything.

He had already almost lost something once. Zayne knew by now that these things should be cherished more. That nothing was better than the present.

"Mom, Dad…" Zayne said. "It's getting late. And it's a weekend. Shouldn't they just spend the night?"

His parents looked at each other. Then clapped their hands. "Yes, that's an excellent idea! We'll help you make the ice cream. I heard that tonight is supposed to be beautiful for stargazing."

Zayne smiled. "And… maybe we can do something later as a family, together."

*****

"Hm… this reminds me of the shelter," the girl said.

They were sitting down on a blanket that Zayne's parents had set for them in the grass, picking away from their bowls of ice cream while gazing at the stars.

"The star gazing?" Caleb said, his spoon in mouth. He swallowed. "Yeah… we haven't done this in a while."

The girl shook her head. "No, not just that… The taste of apple makes me think about how happy we were back then. About the hope we had for the future. We've been missing that."

"Yeah… I guess we have," Caleb looked at the sky. "Man, we're just full of coincidences, huh? Maybe it really must be fate."

The breeze caressed their faces. The girl leaned forward, a strand of her hair falling onto Zayne's shoulder. He twisted his body, their noses almost touching. A dollop of ice cream rested on the top. Was she always this messy of an eater? Unconsciously, Zayne reached his hand out, swiping the spot away. The girl blinked at him.

For a moment, Zayne swore the strands of her hair turned red. The strands floated endlessly from her body, but three of them stuck out on end, twisting together. They reminded him of the strings of fate. He had seen this once before, the day they met. But where would those tangled strings lead? And how many paths were yet to be uncovered?

One of the strands seemed to point towards him, twirling around his finger. But the other extended past him—

Caleb grabbed his arm, and the strands fell back, fading back into her hair. Caleb let go, as if burned. Twisting his body to the side, Caleb pulled his green messenger bag onto his lap. "Hey, I still got those apple drawings. Should I show Zayne?"

"What? Caleb, no!" the girl lunged over, trying to snatch the bag from him. Caleb held it high above his head where she couldn't reach.

"Why not? We saw Zayne's photos. I think it's only fair. Plus, they're precious to me. That's why I still have them after all this time."

Zayne grunted. His stomach flipped, and he wondered if he may have eaten something bad.

Caleb kept everything he saw as vital in that bag. He pulled out two papers. One of them was scratched with crisp green lines in the shape of an apple. The other was a bunch of red scribbles, meant to be smaller than the other. "Caleb" was written around it, the letters far apart and lopsided.

"This is when we trying to figure out what apples looked like. When I made fun of her sketch, she claimed it only looked ugly because it was supposed to be me," Caleb laughed. "And that's how that all started."

Zayne devoured the pages, evidence of a life before him. Or perhaps they did this when he had also been there, none the wiser. If he had been more interested, if he had found the courage to speak to her earlier… would he have been drawing apples with them?

What was the point of these coincidences if he never acted upon them?

Zayne shoved a scoop of his ice cream into his mouth. The sweet taste washed away all his regrets. "Maybe… next time you're over, I can give you a full course on Wanderers. Something you're more familiar with."

"Did you forget what happened the last time we did that?" Caleb mimicked the slingshot with his spoon, swinging it in the air.

"I've… gotten better," Zayne insisted. It was true. Ever since that day, he realized he needed to take those training classes more seriously. He may still need work on controlling his Evol, but at the very least, he knew the basics of dodging and combat… and the weak points of certain Wanderers. He didn't know how much he could show her with her own skill level, but maybe… he could make for a more appropriate rival.

And well, the glasses did help. Caleb had a point there.

"Mm, I'll be the judge of that," Caleb sucked on his spoon. He popped it out when something flew by in the sky. "Hey, that looks like the D-37, the newest model at the DAA."

"You have to be an expert on planes to tell from that far away," Zayne said.

"When I like something, I really fixate on it."

"3… 7… lucky numbers!" the girl held her hands up. "Don't you think they fit us perfectly? Caleb's right. We keep finding coincidences. We must be blessed by the gods."

Zayne looked at his ice cream. "Maybe it really is the apple. It's a good luck charm. Full of peace."

Caleb and the girl looked at each other.

"That was… a very terrible joke," the girl giggled.

Zayne blinked. "I thought it was funny."

Wasn't the point of jokes to be witty? And he was only copying what they always did.

Apple, if said a certain way, can be mistaken for the word "peace."

From the distance, Zayne heard the constant clicks of his parents snapping photos of them from inside the house. He sighed, digging back into his ice cream.

"…You said I hated you," Caleb whispered.

Zayne paused, but didn't say anything.

"Well…I did. But we have something in common now. So this is a promise," Caleb grumbled. “…We’re friends."

Zayne dropped his spoon. Did he hear that right?

“Friends? We are?” Zayne asked, unable to resist the grin that was forming on his face.

“Yeah, you’ve earned it," Caleb glanced at Zayne and scowled, hitting his arm with his spoon. “Don’t act so smug over it. It’s not that big of a deal.”

But it was. It wasn't easy breaking down Caleb's walls, when he was always so rough around the edges, even now. Zayne grinned wider. He grinned so wide that his cheeks hurt. He didn't think he ever grinned this wide before, and so naturally.

If only he could protect this friendship forever.

Zayne found himself no longer wanting to leave. Maybe… he could convince his parents to wait another year? If he could prove his Evol is under control now…

Surely he was allowed this one indulgent thought.

"Are we really friends now…?" the girl widened her eyes. Clasping her hands with Zayne's and Caleb's—locking them together—she looked at them expectanctly, shaking their connection. "I've never seen Caleb admit to having friends before! This is huge!"

"Don't ruin the mood, Pip-squeak," Caleb winced.

Zayne coughed. "Well, since we're friends…"

"I should take you all to meet my other friend! This is so exciting..."

Now it was Caleb's turn to drop his spoon. A heavy silence descended upon them.

"I…I thought you said you were being bullied and had no friends…" Zayne cleared his throat. Then cringed. That didn't sound right, did it?

Friendships weren't meant to be exclusive. He should probably be happy for her… but, well… he thought he would've been her first friend, like she was his… and at least for a while…

Caleb clenched his fists. "Hold up… how am I just now finding out about this? And why does Zayne know about your school life more than I do?"

"I figured you'd already know," Zayne stared at him.

"I… I somehow must have overlooked…" Caleb bit his lip. "Who is it? And do they… do they make you smile?"

The girl laughed. "No stealing away my friend, you big meanie! You'll just have to see for yourself."

Caleb leaned to Zayne, whispering. "We have to find out who that is."

"Why you dragging me into this?"

"Because I know you want to know as well," Caleb's eyes glimmered. "And I need my revenge. Why did she confide in you but not me?"

Zayne sighed. Just what he had gotten himself entangled with? The hot air was filled with various emotions. But for the first time in a long time…

Zayne stared down the flying orb that hovered by his face, flashing a warning signal. Dr. Fang fought the board for so long against robotic help, but eventually he could no longer deny the beneficial possibilities, so robots gradually made their way into the hospital. Assistants, surgical tools, entertainment. 

Robots could never replicate humans. They were factual, but incapable of nuance. They drew a hard line between everything. Maybe one day, the division they cause would be enough to reduce the need of humanity and nature. 

Zayne wasn’t any different from a robot. 

“Zayne? Why are you so early? You came without your parents?”

Zayne turned to Dr. Fang, who came running out from the corridor. 

“I’ve gotten used to public transportation. Besides, my parents are busy with preparations.” 

It wasn’t a lie, but… Zayne was hiding from his parents. He had another nightmare, and it had been more vivid than the others. Like he was living an entire life in a world that was similar to his own, but also not. This world was bleak, on the verge of collapse, with no life on the streets, and robots filling the void of humanity. Zayne flitted through damp alleys, always in search of something. And when he finally found it… it was always the same case as before. Dark crystals crawling towards trembling figures—

Zayne rubbed his arms. Some days, his nightmares were symbolic, ambiguous. He couldn’t make sense of them. But on days like last night, he couldn’t tell anymore which world was his. He couldn’t look his parents in the eye, when the last memory he had of them was covered in blood. The images overlapped too much, like he was seeing something that wasn’t there, yet to be revealed to the surface, and that looking would only exacerbate that. What if the dreams were prophetic, and he messed up again? He wasn’t usually one to believe in stuff like that, but the past few months have been so bizarre and life altering that he couldn’t fully put it aside. These dreams were telling him something. A matter he would need to investigate eventually. 

“Hm, so you’re really moving then… a shame. I know it was our suggestion, but won’t you regret not spending more time with your childhood?” 

“We all need to grow up at some point.” 

“We’re just worried about you. Your parents are always talking about how you’re growing up too fast,” Dr. Fang ruffled Zayne’s head. 

Zayne jerked away from him. He couldn’t rely on his parents forever. He would need to carve his own path soon. And he couldn’t stand the sad gazes they gave him. It twisted his gut, making him choke on his words. He didn’t want to disappoint anyone. Didn’t want to hurt anyone. Distance was required. 

“Anyways, come with me. We have another check up with Josephine’s girl. You arrived early because you wanted to see her, right?” 

Oh…  was that today? 

Zayne’s heart thudded in his chest. He both feared and anticipated his meetings with the girl. He never felt more childish and out of control in his entire life. He disliked it. But also not. He couldn’t wrap his head around his clashing feelings. 

Zayne trailed after Dr. Fang back into the long white halls, abandoning the green scenery of the courtyard at his back. 

*****

“Zayne! We’re here!”

Zayne looked up from the medical textbook he was reading. Studying wasn’t unusual for him, but before meeting the girl, it had just been a mere obligation. He skimmed through the pages, not spending any more time on a passage than the other. But now his eyes soaked up each word, numerous annotations dotting each line. The pages were dogeared several times over, and a crumpled sticky note fluttered to the ground. 

He swallowed. The sunlight hit her figure and enveloped her in a halo, reminding him of a painting in a museum. Gazing at the girl, his heart raced uncomfortably. His hands twitched, needing to be occupied with something, anything. He was still trying to understand this…newfound desire. That’s what it was, right? Passion. Motivation. It burned through his veins, aching to escape. He didn't know it felt so…  chaotic, disorganized. But there was strange freedom within that chaos. The idea that, if only he could release it, achieve it, he would be so much lighter. It made him wonder why he ever tried suppressing it, when it felt so much better to rebel. 

“Zayne, you wear glasses?” her voice took him from his thoughts. 

Zayne brought his hand to his face, pushing them up his nose. He refused to wear them for so long out of embarrassment… but his parents kept insisting. And eventually, he caved. 

He wore the glasses during class to see the smart boards from a distance. Since he didn’t often need to see far away, Zayne kept the usage minimal. However, he sometimes brought them to the hospital, just to ensure accurate vision so he did not miss a thing. 

“Ah, so that’s why you couldn’t dodge the balls, four eyes?” Caleb taunted, stepping from behind the girl, ever her shadow. His hand was interlinked with hers. Zayne stared at the union. 

“I’m surprised you remember that,” Zayne said coldly, turning back to his book. 

“I remember many things, when it counts,” Caleb grinned. “Like how you ran from the pet shop.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Zayne lifted the book higher, concealing his face as heat creeped up his neck. “That must be a misunderstanding. But I do often frequent the bookstore. I believe there is a pet shop on the way. Perhaps you just caught me as I was going there.” 

“Ah. Wrong turn, was it?” Caleb nodded sagely. “Sure, sure.” 

It wasn’t entirely inaccurate. He did take a wrong turn when he first stumbled upon the pet shop. It had been pure coincidence. Until it no longer was. But Caleb didn’t need to know that. 

Zayne cleared his throat. “What are you even doing here? You don’t like doctors and always decline consultations.”

Caleb fluttered his eyelashes, placing his free hand over his heart. “I’m only acting like a proper older brother as I promised. Is that against the rules? She’s a total spaz without me. I have to tag along to make sure nothing happens.”

“I could…” 

“Children, children, settle down,” Dr. Fang knocked on the doorframe, swinging into the room. He glanced at Zayne, quirking an eyebrow. “Again? The Secrets of Cardiology?” 

Zayne closed the book, sliding it into his bag. He straightened his back. “I’ve developed an interest.”

“Well, that much is obvious. It’s not like you to have an interest in anything,” he glanced at the girl, a smile tugging at his lips. “Ana, sit on the table. Don’t be shy now. This isn’t your first rodeo and won’t be your last.”

The girl shuffled to the table only after Caleb had pushed at her back. She kicked her legs, her feet inches from the floor. Dr. Fang moved around the room, setting up the equipment. Zayne stood by the girl, her legs grazing his thigh with each uplift. A shudder went through his body. Zayne shifted his feet, putting distance between them, but the girl tugged on his arm, pulling him close. She pointed to her lips, eyes sparkling. Unable to deny her, he bent down, leaning his ear towards her. 

“Zayne! About the ‘Account Book’ you told me to make…” she whispered, shielding her face from Caleb. 

She meant the advice he had given her a week ago after she kept complaining about Caleb not doing things for her. It was mainly a joke to get back at Caleb. He never expected her to actually do it. “Yes, what about it?”

“You’re a genius! It’s been really helpful.” 

Zayne snuck a peek at Caleb, who was watching them intently. He leaned even closer to the girl, his legs caging hers, locking together as if sharing a secret. “It has? Let me see.”

The girl looked back, but Caleb had removed his gaze to the side, arms crossed. The coast clear, she rummaged in her bag and pulled out a small leather bound notebook. Zayne took it, flipping through the charted pages. 

He blanched. “It’s full already?” 

She pouted. Her puffed cheeks reminded him of that squirrel in the courtyard. “Yeah, he’s been a real meanie ever since school started.” 

“Most of these are about him not doing your homework…” Zayne trailed off. He blinked, then laughed. He couldn’t help it. It was a breathy chuckle that fanned her cheek. She stared at him, memorized. 

“Ahem. Are you really struggling with your homework? I can tutor you in his place,” Zayne whispered. 

“Really? You… want to tutor me?” her eyes widened. 

“Yes, I—” something smacked Zayne in the face. He rubbed his cheek, turning his head. Caleb was staring at him, his hand in the air. He shoved it into his hoodie pocket and looked away again, whistling. 

The plane made from a medical newsletter fell to the ground. 

“Caleb!” the girl scolded. 

“What? He was too close,” Caleb whipped his head, defensive. “Why do you two have to whisper?” 

“Maybe if you weren’t so picky…” the girl stuck her tongue at him. “Zayne is way nicer than you.” 

Caleb narrowed his eyes. “What happened to him being scary? You told me I was the best before coming here.” 

“Alright, enough,” Dr. Fang sighed, clapping his hands. “Let’s begin with the examination now.” 

The routine was standard. Dr. Fang first examined her with a stethoscope, beckoning Zayne to listen in. Then he switched to the ultrasound, asking Zayne to read off the results of the monitor. Praising Zayne for his analysis as always, he grabbed the girl’s arm, clicking some buttons on the watch around her wrist. He frowned, stroking his chin. 

“Your heart seems to be straining… have you been using your Evol lately?”

Caleb clawed at his knees with his nails, lowering his head. 

Interesting. 

“I only use it sometimes…” she mumbled. 

Zayne pushed his way through, peering down at the watch. Dr. Fang had pulled up the last few tests in her history, spiky lines followed by flat. 

“These energy charts suggest you’ve been using it more than just ‘sometimes,’” Zayne clicked his tongue. “What have I told you? Too much Evol worsens your condition. You need to monitor yourself more. Stop having people leech off you.” 

Zayne stared pointedly at Caleb. 

“Who’s leeching off of who?” Caleb muttered, quiet enough where she couldn’t hear. But Zayne had picked up on it. 

She clearly used her Evol to help him in some way. Knowing how erratic Caleb got, it was no small amount. 

…At this rate, it was only a matter of time before a repeat of that day would happen because of them. 

The girl blinked at Zayne. She looked back and forth between him and Dr. Fang, her cheeks growing paler by the second. Then threw her head back with a groan. “Oh no, there’s two of them now.” 

“It’s quite a miracle. Zayne has always been exceptional, but he never showed real interest. I was starting to think we were too hard on him. Now, he’s taking it seriously. I have to thank whoever gave him this sudden passion,” Dr. Fang smiled at Zayne. Zayne’s cheeks flushed at the praise. 

“Maybe you’re the one who inspired me,” Zayne mumbled. 

“Or someone else did,” Dr. Fang mused, looking at the girl. 

“Yes, well, it’s nothing special,” Zayne cleared his throat, busying himself with putting away the equipment. Dr. Fang chuckled. 

“Who is it?” the girl frowned. Zayne’s eyes widened. 

“Who knows? Could be anyone,” Dr. Fang shrugged, but there was a teasing crinkle in his eye. “You heard the boy. I’ll prescribe you a higher dose stabilizer today so your energy levels can go back down."  

When the girl groaned again, Zayne nodded. “It’s for your benefit. You wouldn’t have to come here so much if you regulated your heart better.” 

Dr. Fang turned his attention to Caleb. 

“Since you’re here, Caleb, shall I check on you? Josephine mentioned you’ve been complaining about nerve issues. It might be serious, if your arm and head are bothering you—”

“No, thanks. I can deal with it on my own. You just focus on my little sister,” Caleb wrapped an arm around the girl, helping her off the table. 

“Don’t be stupid. You can’t tough out everything,” Zayne scowled. 

“He never listens to us,” the girl sighed, leaning her head against Caleb’s chest. 

“I listen to you, Pip-squeak. But I’m not so weak where you need to worry about me. What kind of older brother would that make me?”

“Well, it can’t be helped. But do come to me if it gets unbearable,” Dr. Fang patted Caleb’s head. Caleb grimaced. Dr. Fang straightened himself and shook out his coat. “If that’s all, I have some time before my next appointment. You three can stay here and chat until I have to kick you out. I’ll let Josephine know.” 

The door slammed shut behind him. 

*****

Zayne wandered the expansive white halls, his heels smacking the sleek tile. It was oddly quiet today. 

He couldn’t stay in the cramped office. He was suffocating—two pairs of eyes on him, one expecting, the other venomous, draining him dry. He once again fled in a hurry. Was he destined to flee forever? How long could he flee before he couldn’t anymore?

He sighed. Before he knew it, he was already heading in the direction of the person he always went to when he was feeling lost, who could provide him guidance. 

But as he neared the general office, the voice he had been seeking gave him pause. 

“If you’re not here for an appointment, I have to ask you to leave. You are disturbing the patients and staff.”

Dr. Fang’s voice was clipped, when Zayne had only ever known him as placating. 

“Dr. Fang, you’re making a big mistake,” an unfamiliar voice coolly replied. “You fail to understand the power within your hands. If raised right, you can mold the power at your disposal to a very useful tool that can make or break the world! We just need him on our side.” 

“He’s a child. Not one of your experiments.”

“You know as well as we do that he’s not just any child. That’s why you went to the Arctic. It’s what our research is about.” 

“Leave. Now. While I’m still asking nicely. Or I’ll have to call security.”

Zayne flinched. Dr. Fang never shouted. Not even when he knew what Zayne had done that day. It went against his policy. Zayne frowned, piecing the bits he caught from the conversation so far. But none of it was making sense. He knew Dr. Fang went to the Arctic, but he never fully said what happened, other than that he had seen things… things similar to that day. What exactly was in the Arctic? His confusion only grew. Were they… talking about him? But what did that have to do with him and Dr. Fang's research? He couldn’t be sure. 

“…Everyone trusts us now. They expect us to lead them into the future with our world changing technological developments and our contribution to space that puts NASA to shame. We have entered a new industrial era, and soon… we will enter a new world, born from this one’s ashes, with us at its center,” the other voice said reverently. Then the tone changed, coming out as a dark hiss, “You are aware of what awaits us. Can you truly say you won’t regret it? That you won’t feel guilt? You’re going to risk all our hard work over some last minute morals? When the world ends because he couldn’t be tamed, that’s on your hands.” 

Dr. Fang was silent for a moment. “A child isn’t capable of the destruction you speak. He will grow as a child. Nothing more. They don’t deserve to be dragged into our mess. That’s our responsibility as adults.”

“But children are the key,” the voice said smugly. “Thanks to Unicorn, we’ve discovered the path to success… numerous children with hidden potential, special abilities. If we find all the ones with compatible DNA and Evols… we will be unstoppable. With them under our complete control, a disaster will become nothing. They are the team who will lead us into the bright future!” 

“…I’m not an idiot,” Dr. Fang snapped. “In the beginning, you only ever failed. And each failure brought complications. These Wanderers look awfully similar to those complications, don’t you think? It’s convenient how you are suddenly now profiting from all of this. Just what are you trying to achieve with these Protocores you created? You think you can replicate that?”

“It’s interesting, isn’t it? How Protocores work. They’re the raw and primal source of Evols, but yet they work just like magic. However, we are told to believe magic is fiction. But that’s what they said about the Lemurians. If one legend we’ve been told was a lie got revealed as the truth… just how many legends are real?” the voice mused. “You better make a decision soon, Dr. Fang. Before that boy you are so fond of brings us destruction. It’s only a matter of time until he awakens when he’s not on a leash. So what side will you be on? It would be a shame if you became another statistic like Gaia. You’ve heard the news, I’m sure.”

Something struck Zayne's head, his vision flickering. For a brief moment, Zayne was no longer standing on sleek tile, but surrounded by gravel, with white walls fading into dilapidated stone, and water pooling at his feet. When he leaned closer to the puddle, searching for his reflection, he was back at the hospital. Somehow, he just knew. That was all he needed. It was him. 

Zayne paled. He had seen the reports just like everybody else. Scattered explosions, a string of deaths and missing cases that seemed all connected… almost as if someone was behind the scenes. Conspiracy theorists linked this to the reveal and disappearance of Lemurians… the long hidden sea culture that had been abandoned. Zayne had thought the notion ridiculous. But the timing of it all… what were they doing? 

“Ha, your threats don’t scare me. Those experiments will continue to be pointless because you can’t replicate perfection twice. Years of history will teach you that. And your Lemurian research has gotten you nowhere. That’s why the seeker and provider died. That’s why you keep creating Wanderers instead of humans.” 

Zayne stumbled, covering his mouth so as to not get caught. What did he just hear…? 

“The boy… he is frequented by two other children, yes? Siblings. You think we wouldn’t notice? We have eyes everywhere. They make a rather curious pair, don’t you think?” the voice said pleasantly. “Fate is an interesting thing. It brings everyone together to a particular moment in time, a milestone of a branch that’s destined to happen. It’s inevitable. It serves a purpose. And it can be used.”

Boy and girl? Siblings? Only two people came to mind. The ones who have been at the scene of every weird turn in his life. Everything always came back to them. The Catastrophe. His nightmares. Protocore syndrome. Sentient eyes glowing in a crystal cave. Just who were those two? And what did they drag him into? 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Dr. Fang said stiffly. “We’re at a hospital. There are several boys and girls. The children you speak of can be anyone, and they still won’t be the ones you’re looking for. Don’t be a lunatic. The bodies were already uncovered in the explosion that day. The explosion you created. Another one of your failures.” 

That day… they couldn’t possibly mean… that was planned? 

“But that’s where you're wrong, old friend. Our failures have only presented us with new information. We have gotten close, and we’re getting even closer. You just need to make sure that boy stays in line, until the right moment arrives. We’ve come too far for it all to go to waste. Just think about what I’ve said. We're making history. I expect you’ll choose wisely in the end, if you value your life.” 

A man exited the office. He adjusted the collar of his suit, giving out a long sigh as he shut the door behind him. 

Normally, Zayne wouldn’t have been able to see that far, but thanks to his glasses, he was able to take note of the symbol that was embedded onto the man's breast pocket. He squinted his eyes. 

It… looked like the symbol Josephine wore. He had seen it a few times. Embedded on her lab coat when he first saw her, and then again when he snuck a peek at the cover of the notebook she wrote in after dinners. As if she was still actively conducting… experiments. 

Sound deafened as blood rushed into his ears, the thud of his heart overpowering everything else. Could it be… was this all still just an experiment? Even his parents and Dr. Fang… 

Hands grabbed at Zayne’s shoulders. Before he could scream, the hands slid up to his mouth, and he was pulled into an empty room. Just in time—footsteps faded from the other side of the door. If he had remained a second longer, he would’ve been spotted. 

The hands let go of his mouth. “Just what do you think you’re doing? You have a death wish or something?”

Zayne released a breath of relief. Oh. It was just Caleb. 

Wait, was that really a relief? 

“She wanted to go after you, you know. She wouldn’t shut up about it. But she’d only get lost if she went by herself. I went looking for you despite all my doubts because I didn’t want her to worry, but I should’ve just trusted my gut,” Caleb rolled his eyes. “If I had known you were getting yourself into something dangerous, I would’ve just left you for dead.”

“Then why even bother saving me?” Zayne wiped his mouth, trembling. What was that? 

“It wouldn’t be good for me either if you got caught,” Caleb sneered. “I knew something was up since the moment we met.” 

Zayne pressed a hand over his chest. His breath was ragged, his heart still beating erratically. He heard something he shouldn’t have. If only he could go back to a few minutes ago… if only he had stayed in the room… 

Fate. That’s what the man said. Was it really fate? Was this all part of some grand plan? His dreams had hinted at something similar before, hadn’t they? A loop, they called it. A routine set of events destined to happen over and over again, impossible to prevent. 

“So… you’re going to end us, is that it?”

His accusation brought Zayne out of the fog. He lowered his hand, straightening his back. “W-we don’t know that. They never said that was me. Dr. Fang said that could be anyone.”

“You’re the only boy who follows him around that he’s fond of,” Caleb raised an eyebrow. He stepped closer. Zayne stepped back, hitting a wall. Caleb lowered his voice. “Well, are you?” 

Looking into Caleb’s eyes, Zayne saw entire galaxies. Each galaxy burned until they exploded, disintegrating into mist. The mist was like a wall, an endless void that approached closer and closer, inescapable. It kept going until there was nothing left, golden threads snapped and collapsed into dust. Forgotten and lost to time. And at the center of it all was his reflection, a black coat billowing behind him, extending its tails like shadows embracing death. The grim reaper. Total destruction. The end of the world. 

Zayne blinked. “…I’ve decided. I’m going to be a doctor. I’ll save people. It can’t be me.”

Caleb scoffed. “Don’t be naive. A killing machine can’t be a doctor.” 

“…I’m not a killer.” 

“But you almost were,” Caleb tilted his head. “And you’re destined to be. Well, I won’t let you.” 

“Huh?”

“I said I won’t let you. Don’t get me wrong. I couldn’t care less about this world. It’s as good as dead, if you ask me. You can destroy it all you want… but she’s in this world. And that complicates things. If you ever go berserk again… I’ll stop you. So don’t worry.” 

Zayne laughed dryly, shaking his head. “This is… this is bigger than me. I want nothing to do with it. I…” 

I don’t want to hurt her. 

“Are you gonna go back to your familiar bubble then? Pretend nothing happened, until you can’t anymore?” Caleb grabbed him by the collar. “Get over yourself. You know too much. That makes you an accomplice. So, what are you going to do about it?”

Zayne stared into Caleb’s eyes, swirling like two black holes. “And how much do you know? What happened when I met you?” 

Caleb tightened his grip on the collar, frowning. “I… I don’t remember much before Josephine. We… we weren’t there for long, you know? It felt long. But it was… was only a year. I don’t want to remember. But some things… some things come back to me. A certain word, a certain smell… it’s like… selecting a scene from a movie. I can pull something out of the memory bank when I need it most. I need to remember… because she’s unaware. Only I can protect her.” 

Zayne gritted his teeth. All his life, Zayne had been called a genius. No one had ever dared to look down on his skills… until Caleb. Caleb made him feel so… small, helpless. Dumb. 

Did he think it was that simple? Taking on everything by himself… Zayne could never compare to that fierce desire. It… irritated him. This boy with no thought of his own well being, arrogant enough to think he alone could solve any problem. Zayne wanted to chip that armor, try harder than ever before to keep up with Caleb, to show him he wasn’t the only one who can protect. He wasn’t the pathetic boy who couldn’t even save himself like Caleb thought he was. No, Zayne was done hiding. Done being blind. 

He just simply couldn’t be outdone by someone two years his junior, was all. He was the oldest. He needed to act like it. 

He wasn’t going to let him take all the credit. They were stuck in this together now, weren’t they? 

Zayne placed his hand over Caleb’s. “EVER is calculating the explosions, targeting Gaia and children.” 

“So? Why should I care about that?”

“Because sooner or later… Josephine…”

Caleb narrowed his eyes, the intensity dulling to immobile clouds. “What about her?”

Zayne tugged at his hand. “Death isn’t the solution. No one deserves to die.” 

“There you go again. Your kindness is sickening,” Caleb gagged, letting him go. 

“Aren’t you scared of dying?” 

Caleb looked at him. “Terrified. But that’s why I’m willing to do whatever it takes to save her.”

Zayne still didn’t understand. “You’re insane.” 

“Come up with a more creative insult, why don’t you?” Caleb brushed past him, peeking out the door. “Let’s get out of here. Before she gets too worried.”

As they snuck out, Dr. Fang was just coming back, and he stared at them in shock. “Zayne? Caleb? What were you doing there?”

“It’s… it’s not what it looks like…” Zayne yelped. 

“It’s exactly what it looks like,” Caleb corrected. “Whatever that is.” 

Dr. Fang opened his mouth, and Zayne braced himself for a scolding. But it never came. 

“Dr. Fang, is this him?” a voice intruded. Zayne jumped, his gaze swinging up. The man from before. Their gazes clashed. The corner of his lips twitched up. “Hello there. You must be… Zayne Li, was it? I’m glad I got the chance to meet you.” 

Zayne didn’t respond. 

“I thought I told you to leave,” Dr. Fang placed his hands on Zayne’s shoulders. 

“Don’t get your hackles raised, Dr. Fang. I only forgot something,” the man sighed. “It’s a happy coincidence.”

The man glanced at Zayne again. His eyes then took in Caleb. He leaned closer. “And this boy…?”

Caleb wrapped an arm around Zayne. “Not interested. Now scram.” 

The man stared Caleb down, his eyes widening. He backed away, chuckling. “This hospital carries an array of gems. Has that vulgar attitude landed you in trouble yet? You should watch yourself more. Nothing good comes from disobedient children.”

“I do my part well enough. But what about you?” Caleb lifted his chin. “How disposable are you? Enough to need a Protocore to defend yourself?” 

The man blinked. “You mean this?” 

He pulled out a crystal from his breast pocket. As he turned it, light bounced off it, shining at them in red. “This is as common as you are. Something that won’t be missed. It’s faulty. But can still serve a purpose, as long as it earns the right owner.” 

Zayne stiffened. How did Caleb know the man had a Protocore? But now that Zayne was aware, he saw something… simmering under the surface. He could feel it growing, getting out of control. If it continued to fester, it might peel off the skin, tearing through the cloak that rippled over his form. Zayne covered his mouth. That familiar wave of disgust washed over him. But Caleb remained straight faced, as if he couldn’t see what Zayne saw. 

“Children, didn’t your parents teach you not to accept things from strangers?” Dr. Fang pushed the man back. 

“Parents? Don’t be absurd. It’s impossible to be taught by something that doesn’t exist,” the man scoffed. He sidestepped Dr. Fang, which caused him to graze against Caleb. He grabbed at his arm, steadying himself with a squeeze. “Dogs should behave, don’t you think? They shouldn’t seek too much and start biting hands where they don’t belong. Don’t forget.” 

Caleb narrowed his eyes. The man let go of his arm and finally walked away. 

“Why did you two wander from the examination room?” Dr. Fang sighed. “Go back. Gentlemen shouldn’t leave a girl behind. I need to get Josephine.” 

Caleb and Zayne made their way back. Silence descended upon them. Until… 

“You’re… adopted?” Caleb whispered. 

Zayne looked away. “It’s… not that much of a secret.” 

“Then are you…” Caleb shook his head. “They must be using you as well.” 

Zayne widened his eyes. “No, I think you’re misunderstanding…” 

“No,” Caleb said firmly. “I know what it’s like. You don’t need to explain. Surely you’ve felt it. And now knowing what we know… it’s all some game to them. But… that just means we need to stick together. Outsmart them.” 

“Outsmart them? How are we supposed to do that?” Zayne distanced himself. “And I thought you sided with EVER.” 

Caleb pursed his lips. “That’s… complicated. But if they’re going after her…”

They opened the door to the exam room. The girl jumped up, rushing into Caleb’s arms. Caleb’s bitter expression melted in an instant. A strange pang hit Zayne in the chest. 

“Gege! There you are! And you found Zayne!” the girl beamed. “I was worried you got lost after all that talk about knowing the way better than me.” 

“How could you ever doubt me, Pip-squeak?” he ruffled her hair. “Anyways, say goodbye. We gotta go.” 

“But… I haven’t had a chance to talk to Zayne…” she pouted. 

Zayne placed a hand on her shoulder. “We can talk later when you come over to my house. I won’t be able to tutor you otherwise, remember?”

Caleb froze. His eyes shifted to Zayne. “Tutoring…?”

“Oh, right. We did say that,” the girl blushed, removing herself from Caleb. 

“Why… didn’t you ask me?” Caleb rubbed his neck. 

“Because you always say no!” the girl whined. “Zayne was kind enough to offer.” 

Caleb stared harder. But then a gleam entered his eyes. There and gone. “Okay… if you say so.” 

Zayne blinked. He wasn’t expecting that reaction. 

But he wasn’t able to elaborate. Josephine came to gather her children. 

Before they left, Caleb hit Zayne with a smirk. “We’ll just have to see. Talk to you later.”

What else was there to talk about? 

*****

Zayne reentered the corridor. He made his way to the reception desk in the lobby, his head down, filled with thoughts. 

He looked at his hands. The hands of a killer. Was his passion really just a farce? An escape from his guilt? A selfish desire… 

He opened and closed his hands. He had lost control before. What if he lost control again? Was that day… connected to his fate? Then… how much longer did he have before he “awakened”? What exactly was his Evol? 

A flash of white darted past him. Zayne stopped, looking up. A man stood at the desk, leaning against the wood. Where had he come from? His hair was white as snow, drooping over his eyes, bright blue like frozen water. A chill covered Zayne. An odd foreboding. Like he was seeing something he shouldn’t have been seeing. Not here. Not yet. 

“So… this is the hospital?” the man said. He glanced down at Zayne. “I didn’t think there would be so many travelers here. It’s so… antiquated. But it doesn’t matter. The goal is all the same, right?”

“Who… are you?” 

The man blinked at him. “I’m just like you. Although I never would’ve expected you to pick a place like this.”

Zayne backed up. “Huh? What do you mean, you’re just like me? That’s not possible.”

The man shrugged. “You’ll come to understand, little Emissary. Now that the loop has started, it’s inevitable.” 

The loop. That word again. From his dream— 

The man picked a mint from the jar. “You’re not tall enough to reach this yet, right? Here.” 

He tossed the mint. Zayne caught it, cupping his hands. 

“A wise man I look up to once told me that everything feels better after a taste of something sweet. You look like you need it.”

Zayne’s eyes widened. How did he…?

But just like that, the man was gone again. As if he was never there, a figment of his imagination. 

A lingering voice echoed in his mind. Don’t let the variables affect you. 

Zayne looked back down at the mint in his hand. Looking left and right, he unwrapped the mint and popped it into his mouth. 

His anxiety vanished. It wasn’t an addiction, but a taste he often found himself chasing… as if desperate to achieve something. 

The sweet flavor on his tongue brought him back to the smile he saw that day. 

“As long as I have something sweet, I can feel happy even on a bad day.”

He sucked some more. Ah. Maybe it was because… it felt like he was closer to her. 

It shooed away the loneliness. The guilt. 

He wondered if the other version of him felt the same way when he ate dark chocolate. 

No… where is she? I can’t be alone… 

Thunder banged like a gunshot. His head exploded into pain, turning his vision white. He gritted his teeth. Dammit. It escaped him again. 

He was slowly forgetting who he was. Bits and pieces—a hand tightening around his heart, squeezing until his soul scattered into a billion broken fragments, impossible to build back together again. A tug on the brain, as if something there was being… warped. Twisted to mush. Strangely, he only experienced this sensation every storm, and it got stronger after each one. Consuming him from the inside out. Anxiety crawled over him. 

Some days, he would black out completely, with no memory of what had just transpired. Nothing but the faintest emotion, remnant of what he had lost. Caleb was always watching a movie in reverse only to discover missing frames and a lack of context, while everyone else around him watched the movie forward. 

He didn’t like it. Didn’t like that he was forgetting. Didn’t like that she was leaving him behind once more. 

Once… more? 

Thunder clapped again. He clutched his head. 

He was forgetting something important. But what? Why couldn’t he remember? If he could just reach inside and retrieve it… 

But it was already gone, sunken into some abyss. Caleb could never make sense of his dreams. He only knew that in each dream, he felt… abandoned. As if he had just lost someone precious. An endless cycle of suffering, across several different lives. Would he ever get what he lost back? Would the cycle finally end? 

The sky cracked open, lightning striking the ground, eliminating the last of his thoughts. Groaning, Caleb opted to get out of bed.

At the shelter, he would sneak into the girl’s room to comfort her at night. But now that they were living with Josephine, the old woman made sure to separate them. Caleb hated it. And he hated even more how happy the girl was at the thought of having her own room. Because he wasn’t ready to sleep alone yet. 

Rubbing his bleary eyes, he entered the living room. Lightning flashed, illuminating the space. It was still dark outside. As Caleb ventured further into the layout, a thud from upstairs startled him. 

He slowly approached, stretching out his hand, gathering energy. But just before he could pounce, the girl emerged from the shadows. 

He quickly lowered his hand. “Pip-squeak? What are you doing?”

She gave an exaggerated yawn. “Had another nightmare. So I climbed into the attic. You can see the stars from the skylight…” 

Thunder interrupted her. She yelped, flying into Caleb’s arms. Caleb wobbled, steadying her. 

“But… but… the attic is very small, and the… the…” 

“Scared of a lil’ thunder, Pip-squeak?” Caleb tightened his hold on her. 

“So are you,” she mumbled into his shoulder. “That’s why you’re clinging to me, isn’t it?” 

He didn’t answer. Instead, he shifted on his feet, walking them to the couch. 

“So, what’s the real story? You haven’t had a nightmare in a while,” Caleb said. “And… you would’ve come to me otherwise, like you usually do, right? What are you hiding from me?” 

She stiffened in his hold. “You… you don’t know that! Now that school has started, we should be more independent, don’t you think?”

Caleb scoffed. Why should he care about what others think? It was just the two of them. They weren’t hurting anybody or each other. People were just too damn noisy and needed to learn to mind their own business. 

“You say that, yet you’re still scared of thunder and closed spaces. I also clearly remember you crying whenever you got lost on your own… which wasn’t too long ago, by the way,” Caleb flicked her forehead. 

“Hold my hand. You won't have to worry about losing your way when I'm here.” 

Yes, back when they had first moved in with Josephine, into this unfamiliar house, the girl had trouble gaining her bearings and remembering where she was. It was up to Caleb to remind her, as per usual, and comfort her. She would always be up late into the night, crying herself into a sobbing mess… 

Caleb blinked. Wait a minute…

He leaned forward. She bent back in reaction, averting her gaze to something over his shoulder. Clicking his tongue, he snatched her cheeks to get her to look directly at him again. His pupils flicked left to right as he inspected her face, not missing a thing. “Were you… crying?”

“N-no! Don’t be ridiculous!” she sniffed, wiping her eyes. 

There weren’t any tear stains. But he recognized those swollen, bloodshot eyes anywhere. 

“Why are you crying here by yourself?” Caleb demanded, his thumbs pressing down on her cheeks. Her memory had finally started to stick after a few weeks, and with it, her nightmares disappeared. She had no reason to cry anymore… unless… 

The only new factor was school. The girl was placed in a different grade than him, so they rarely saw each other outside the house. Caleb had never wished to be twins until now. The mistaken label had annoyed him at first, reminding him of the familial bond that was forced upon him. He was registered as eleven years old, while she was registered as eight—three years between them. A gap he now resented. Caleb wasn’t able to protect her from afar if he couldn’t see her. 

Rage boiled inside him. It erupted out his mouth, “Who bullied you?” 

The girl’s eyes widened. She shook her head. “When did I say I was bullied? You got it all wrong…”

But her body couldn’t prove her words. She broke off into a hiccup, then another, and she was no longer able to hold it all. Caleb shushed her, rubbing her back. “It’s okay, I’ll avenge you.” 

“No, I swear I can handle it myself,” she shook her head again. “I don’t want to bother you… You’ve been so kept together at school, so perfect. Everybody practically loves you. We really are in a different world from the shelter now, aren’t we?”

“Don’t say that. You think I’m perfect?” Caleb clenched his fists. 

…That wasn’t it. Caleb exhibited a talent for physical prowess, which made everyone, teachers and students alike, flock to him. Somehow he had already been roped into playing for the basketball team (“the boy will go far with those strong arms)”. His grades also excelled in math and science, which placed him at top of his class.

It wasn’t that anyone found him approachable. They were just in awe that the new kid from nowhereville was so good at multiple things. Yet no one actually knew him beyond that. They had no desire to investigate his background. He was upstanding… but still an outsider. Whenever he passed through the halls, stares burned his back, whispers irritated his ears. It didn’t matter what environment he was in. They all wanted a piece of his flesh. No one ever had pure intentions. The moment he disappointed anyone? They would all look away, discard him as trash. That was all he was worth. So he simply just didn’t disappoint. That way no one could ever throw him away. It was a function he couldn’t turn off. 

And… it worked, hiding all those flaws, those struggles. Observing what “good kids” do and enacting the role. It made her look at him, too. Like he was someone genuinely special. Her entire world. Not just a mere tool to be used on someone’s whim. But a person, a human. She made all the stares and whispers fade away whenever she directed her bright smile his way. His sun. 

Caleb didn’t care about the bullies, the teachers, Josephine, even himself… only she stood out. Without his sun by his side, he was just going through the motions, never retaining anything. The world was gray and dull and full of bodies that looked all the same to Caleb. But she was colorful. She gave his life meaning, gave him a purpose in protecting her, being needed by her. 

They would always have each other. They didn’t need anybody else. That’s how it always was. What did it matter if the whole population hated them, as long as they were together? 

“I wish we went to school with Zayne…” the girl sighed. “School would’ve been more bearable. But he’s older than both of us. A whole different level, too.” 

Caleb’s eye twitched. Zayne? That guy again? 

He tried to forget him, but the universe put them together with every sigh, forcing the memory out of his brain. An annoying reminder. He didn’t know how he would’ve coped if Zayne actually attended the same school as them. 

“Do you have a crush on him or something?” 

A blush overtook her cheeks as she shrunk herself even lower. But she didn’t respond. Caleb narrowed his eyes. 

“Wait—”

“And what would be wrong with that? Do you know how many girls in my grade obsess over you?” 

Caleb became slackjawed. No way. She couldn’t have a crush on somebody else. That would be—

“Kids? What are you doing up so early?” Josephine emerged from her room, tying her robe together. 

Streaks of lightning casted shadows over her figure. Caleb held the girl against his chest, glaring at Josephine. “She made a ruckus in the attic. Woke me up.” 

Josephine’s eyes widened. 

“Caleb, you meanie! That was a secret!” the girl pushed him away, turning to Josephine. “…I only wanted to see the stars. Caleb said we did that at the shelter whenever I got sad. It reminds me of home… wherever that is.”

“But she got scared of the thunder,” Caleb stated, tugging the girl back to him, never taking his eyes off Josephine. 

“Well, you were up because you got scared of the dark,” the girl prodded a finger at his chest. “Don’t try to deny it. I know that’s the real reason why you hate storms. It darkens the whole place.”

“Alright, enough,” Josephine pinched the bridge of her nose. “Neither of you should be in the attic. The door is old and can slam shut on you. I haven’t gotten around to replacing it.”

Caleb didn’t see what was wrong about being accidentally locked in the attic. After all, the girl had always kept her bedroom door locked, the few times he had tried coming in there. If it was to protect herself from him… it was effective. 

The girl pouted. “Fine…” 

Josephine clapped her hands. “It seems like you both had a rough night. When the storm lets up, we need to do repairs. Caleb, since you’re good at that, you can help.” 

Caleb scowled. 

“Mm, all these bad feelings made me hungry…” the girl yawned, rubbing her stomach. “Can we eat before we do that?”

“We can eat while we work. I’ll get it prepared.” 

“I’ll make the food,” Caleb said immediately. “That’s supposed to be my job.”

He didn’t trust anything Josephine made. At least when he cooked, he knew what he was giving to the girl. 

And… the nagging voice in his head fell silent when she praised his food. Her gratitude refilled his missing parts. 

Josephine simply smiled at him. “Sure. Let’s make it a picnic. The weather should be calming down soon.” 

*****

The air was damp. The pressure on his skin made his joints even worse, like old parts rusting over. Rain always made the pain in his arm flare up, the migraines ever present. Josephine insisted that was a psychological response. Caleb saw it as an omen. 

Caleb wiped the sweat off his forehead. The weather vane had fallen off, and he was giving it a fresh polish. But he could feel the girl staring intently at him as he worked. Just like she always did whenever he got fixated on building something. 

Caleb resented this weather vane. He didn’t think it would be so delicate. It felt like a reflection on how fragile their relationship really was.

“This is east, this is south, this is west, and this is north,” Caleb pointed to each painted tip of the newly constructed weather vane. “The next time you get lost, just remember these directions. The biggest star you see will always point north. And that’s how you find your way back home.” 

The girl watched his hand, then looked back at him with a pout. “If you're always by my side, do I need to learn anything?”

Caleb paused. It was true that he often held her hand, but… “Have you ever thought of leaving me one day?” 

“But where would I go? Are you going to kick me out?” the girl’s eyes wavered, turning downward. 

Caleb reached for her hand, turning her face back up at him. “I'll always stay by your side. I promise. And I won't ever go back on my word.” 

Except that wasn’t a promise he could ever keep. He made that weather vane so she wouldn’t be scared anymore when he wasn’t around, but all it did was drive her away. Ever since that day, the girl expressed a desire to be free. From him. She had grown too distant. The little push evolved into a chasm. That’s not what he wanted, was it? 

They used to be inseparable. That privilege had given him a knack for knowing her best. But now, it was as if they were never even close to begin with. He no longer knew her best. He couldn’t see what ailed her, and she didn’t want to tell him either, which meant secrets had formed between them. And that bothered him. 

Did she not trust him anymore? Did she see through his act? See that he wasn’t perfect anymore? 

Caleb tossed the screw driver onto the ground. “All done.” 

“Good as new,” Josephine placed her hand on his shoulder. Caleb twisted his body from her grasp and shoved the weather vane into her hand instead. Josephine only smiled at him. 

“Gege,” the girl whined, placing her chin on top of the end of the broomstick she was holding. “Can you…”

“No, Pip-squeak. It’s not fair if I do your chores,” Caleb gazed at the trees. They had planted them as sprouts when they first moved in. A reminder of the shelter. But now they started to grow, inch by inch. A reminder of their distance. The weather vane creaked behind him. “This is part of the growing up you wanted, right? I can’t interfere.” 

Highlights flashed in the girl’s eyes. Caleb bit down on the inside of his cheek, then pivoting on his heel, snatched back the weather vane from Josephine’s hands and brushed past her. The girl opened her mouth to say something, but Caleb had already begun climbing the long ladder to mount the weather vane back on the roof. 

Josephine sighed. “Well, since he’s going to be like that, I guess I’ll get the food.” 

Caleb had just finished twisting the weather vane. He stood frozen there as the screen door shut behind Josephine. Then he descended, his hands skimming the ladder as he landed on the ground. 

He headed after Josephine. The girl chased after him and tugged on his arm. He paused, his hand on the screen door. “Caleb, you’re too reckless! What if you got hurt?” 

His lip twitched. He shrugged her off, slipping through the door. 

“Hey! Don’t be mean to Grandma! I won’t forgive you!” the girl called after him. The door shut, separating them as her pleas fell on deaf ears. 

Grandma this, Grandma that. He was sick of it. She didn’t realize what trouble he went through just for her. 

He slunk into the kitchen, creeping behind Josephine’s back. She didn’t even flinch as Caleb reached his hand around her to grab the plate she had lifted. “I’ll take that.”

“Caleb, you can’t baby her forever,” Josephine wiped her hands on the cloth. “Give her room to breathe. If you get too close—”

“Let me handle this my way,” Caleb said, bringing the plate close to his chest. “That’s the only reason why I’m here.”

“Caleb—” Josephine raised her hand, but Caleb dodged it, moving forward. 

“The food is gonna get stale,” Caleb mumbled. “Sandwiches are so plain. Maybe one day you’ll trust me enough to actually cook over a stove.” 

Caleb went back outside. But when he looked up from the plate, he halted in his tracks. 

The girl was talking to a floating orb. 

The plate slipped from his fingers. But his body was already hurling towards her. He wrapped his arms around her in a protective barrier. Just before the plate could crash onto the ground, he froze it with his Evol. 

His breath hit her neck. Josephine came rushing out. “My goodness.” 

She caught the plate, and Caleb released his hold on it. 

“Gege? What’s wrong?” the girl asked, tapping his back. 

“Robot,” Caleb tightened his grip on her. A red dot beeped from its forehead. 

Robots were a recent development. They started roaming the streets when the Hunters Association formed. At first it was just surveillance, but as other companies got hold of the industry, they were made into other uses. People joked that robots would take over. 

And the number one manufacturer… was EVER. 

“Robots don’t usually venture onto personal property…” Josephine whispered. 

“Let go!” the girl squirmed. 

“Stay back, Pip-squeak,” Caleb held her back. “It’s dangerous.”

“Dangerous? Caleb, it’s a robot. They’re harmless! And this one seems broken, anyways,” the girl squeezed out of his hold. “I was going to ask if you can fix it before you went crazy on me.” 

“Fix it?” Caleb narrowed his eyes. “They should be left alone.”

“But all robots have different personalities. Doesn’t that make them kinda human? What if it’s in pain?”

“Pain? Pip-squeak, it’s a robot. They don’t feel anything. Robots aren’t humans. And they never can be. They’re too different,” Caleb hissed, his arms dropping to his sides as the throbbing returned. He didn’t move his gaze from the robot. 

“Well, at least it’s not a Wanderer,” the girl shrugged. 

“A sense of self can be more dangerous than a mindless beast that has lost all control,” Josephine walked towards the robot. “But it really does seem to be malfunctioning. Perhaps just a reset and then send it on its way.”

“…If you insist,” Caleb picked up his screw driver. “Certainly a new challenge.” 

Caleb tapped the robot, opening a latch. Then got to work. 

As he maneuvered around wires and screws, the robot flickered to life. Static came here and there. Flicking a few buttons, Caleb was able to activate its radio channel. 

“The DAA has reported back with findings from the Deepspace Tunnel. They will continuously make journeys to collect data for Earth.” 

Caleb paused, his fingers in the middle of plucking a wire. 

“The DAA? Isn’t that the place you want to get into when you grow up?” the girl popped up behind him once more to get closer to the radio. “Haven’t heard anything about them in a while.” 

“Because their missions are top secret,” Caleb said. 

“When we asked the Fleets about their goals for Deepspace, they declined to give us detailed answers. The Fleets continue to remain a growing mystery. The most we can gather is that Skyhaven intends to use the Fleets for greater and better things once the armed force is fully developed. The DAA is still limited in their technology, but is currently our best source of information and defense. They wish to use their data to protect Earth, while people speculate the Fleets are moving on….”

Caleb frowned. “If the DAA is competing with the Fleets, shouldn’t they be using Protocores to catch up? They’ll never win if they stick with the same methods.”

“The DAA is old-fashioned. After all, they’re a branch of our old Air Force catered to help with Wanderers and the aftermath of the Catastrophe. No one even knew the Fleets existed until the Catastrophe,” Josephine said, giving the plate to the girl. Caleb glared at the gesture. That should’ve been him. At least there was nothing she could’ve put in it.

“But the Wanderers are not from here. This isn’t something they can handle with normal means,” Caleb tore a wire from the robot. “People say this world won’t last much longer. It’s old and useless. Wouldn’t it be better to use the new technology to their advantage and start looking at one of the worlds from the tunnel?”

“It’s not useless, Caleb! It’s the world we live in.”

“Well, it’s useless if it’s destined to end,” Caleb slammed the latch of the robot down, dusting it off. He stole a part of the sandwich from her plate. “Didn’t we promise to explore other worlds when I become a pilot? This one isn’t anything special. We don’t have to rely on it. There has to be better ones out there. And once I find it, I’ll take you with me.” 

Where no one else can hurt us. 

Ignoring her protests, he shoved the stolen piece into her mouth. She shut up around the mouthful, swallowing. 

“There have been more reports on explosions around urban and suburban districts. Investigations are still ongoing for missing victims, most of which appear to be children. The cases are being handled by the Hunters Association. Protocores and Metaflux are suspected to be the cause. Some casualties have been identified as former scientists belonging to Gaia.”

Caleb turned his gaze to Josephine. 

Her arm appeared next to him as she cut off the radio. “You know what? Maybe these things are no good after all.” 

“They sound useful to me.” 

The vermin that created all this. The ghosts in his nightmares. All gone. Why wouldn’t that be a good thing? An enemy of an enemy was a powerful ally. 

Josephine closed her eyes and released a shaky breath. “Caleb… what do you think I had before I met you?”

He tilted his head. “How should I know? That’s not something I think about.”

“Well, I’m sure Grandma had something important,” the girl said. “That would explain why she’s so loving.”

Caleb rolled his eyes. But Josephine chuckled. That chuckle was filled with sorrow. “The truth is… I had nothing. There was always this… void in my heart that couldn’t be filled. I dived into my work, but that too felt pointless. I didn’t have a family. Didn’t think I needed one. I wasn’t fond of children. They were just a liability. But then you two came along… and I couldn’t bring myself to turn away. Maybe it’s selfish. But… I still want to try. I know nothing about what makes a family. I want us to learn and grow together… I think that’s what makes us a family more than anything else.” 

The girl sniffed, looking at Caleb with those puppy doe eyes. “I also want us to get along. Caleb, can’t you try?” 

Caleb looked down at his hands. One of them was curled into a fist. He hid it behind his back. “Don’t make me barf.” 

Thunder woke the earth once more. Josephine looked ahead, shielding her eyes with her hand. “Oh, dear. Looks like more storms are brewing.” 

Caleb glanced towards the roof. “The weather vane is weak. It won’t survive all these storms.”

“Then we’ll just have to keep putting it back together each time it falls apart.” 

Perhaps Caleb liked to fix things… because it made him foolishly believe he could be fixed as well. All the broken parts. 

“Is it… really worth fixing something that will keep breaking, anyways?”

“Well, I think so.” 

Caleb exhaled, releasing the knot in his chest. He refused to acknowledge it. He couldn’t acknowledge it. He didn’t feel warm. 

This family could only ever be a means to an end. 

Caleb crushed the device he had hidden in his fist. The red blinker died on the robot. 

*****

The doorbell rang. 

“Who is that? Grandma didn’t mention anyone coming over…”

“Stranger danger. If we don’t know, then don’t answer,” Caleb tapped the paper in front of her. “That doesn’t mean you can get out of homework. I’m not doing it for you.”

The girl pouted. “Meanie.” 

The doorbell rang again. Followed by a series of pounding. 

“They won’t go away,” she whispered. 

Caleb glared at the door. “Stay here. I’ll go scout.” 

Caleb slid open the latch to peek out the hole. High maintenance, but one could never be too safe. 

“Well?” the girl snuck up on him, leaning over his shoulder. “Let me see!”

Caleb pushed her. “Nobody important.”

It was a group of boys. Nobody Caleb recognized, but he had an inkling of why they were here. 

Ever since he learned that she had bullies at school, Caleb had… been keeping a closer eye. She still never told him the details, and their age difference kept them apart, so… he had to resort to other means in making sure she was safe. 

He was able to identify the problem. No one said anything when they were together, but when he was gone, they got… too comfortable. Her classmates would comment on how weird the girl was, how she couldn’t do anything on her own. They mocked her relationship with her brother, calling their closeness creepy. She had no friends. She was all alone. He was her only ally. That part, above all else, filled him with giddiness. She still needed him, even if she wouldn’t say it. 

Caleb had overheard some kids in his grade claim they wanted to make a pass at the girl he had been “so obsessed with.” Threats were usually empty, but apparently these ones were bold enough to pick a fight with him at their doorstep. Did they truly think they could get rid of him to get to her? 

He would never let that happen. These were small fry compared to the real deal he had to face. No one was going to take her away from him again. 

The girl placed her hand on the knob. “If you won’t open the door, then I will! Are they your friends? I can’t wait to meet them.” 

Her voice mellowed out into an irritating fuzz that pricked his ears, light fading into a bleak gray. He was back in the sterile room, his arms bound, never able to reach her. No. I’m losing her. His dilated pupils darted back and forth, wandering, searching for an escape route. He can’t lose her—

His gaze landed upstairs, towards the attic. His heart thudded in his chest. 

Caleb snatched the girl’s wrist before she could twist the knob. 

“Gege?” she looked at him, her brow furrowed, eyes wavering. 

“Oh,” Caleb mouthed, retracting his hand. “I left my bag in the attic. You know I can’t play without it, right?” 

“Your bag?” the girl blinked. “Why is it in the attic? Grandma said—”

“Pip-squeak,” Caleb gripped her shoulder. “I really can’t play without it. If you get my bag, I’ll let you play with us. Deal?”

“Promise?” the girl’s eyes sparkled, but then she frowned. “Wait. Why are you making me do it? You know I’m scared.” 

“Hey, you keep telling me you’re all grown up now. Was that a lie?” Caleb sighed. “Guess it can’t be helped. Fine. Be scared forever. You must not trust me anymore.” 

He turned away from her. One, two, three…

“…Fine,” the girl clung to his arm. “I’ll do it.”

Caleb smiled. Gotcha. 

No matter how far apart they were… he still knew how she ticked. He was relieved that she was weak to his provocations and demands. Just like he was to hers. At least that hadn’t changed. 

“Don’t worry, Pip-squeak. I won’t leave you to fend for yourself. I’ll be right here if you need me.” 

She pursed her lips. “You better.” 

She climbed up the stairs, mumbling under her breath all the while. She disappeared into the attic. 

After a few seconds—  

“I don’t see the bag. Are you sure it’s here?”

“Just keep looking, Pip-squeak. I’m sure it’s somewhere,” Caleb cupped his mouth. He trudged up the steps, where her grunts and fruitless shuffling got louder. Quietly, and oh so slowly, he drew closer to the entrance to the attic. Her back was facing him, completely unaware. 

The fuzz in his head twisted into silver-tongued whispers. They coiled around him like a snake, infecting him with murky poison. Safe, safe, safe. 

Then lifting his hand, the door shut in front of him, and the lock fell into place. 

The whispers silenced at once. His body unfolded, light and free. Caleb was at ease. He put his hand on the door, closing his eyes, releasing the breath he didn’t know he had been holding. Now she wasn’t in the way. 

She would be looking for a while. His gaze slanted down. His bag was in his room. And she had been so deep into her search, so trusting of him, she hadn’t even noticed him come up and lock the door. It was almost too easy. But that’s exactly why she couldn’t get involved. He huffed a laugh. Confident, he swaggered down the steps and swung open the front door. 

Three sets of eyes blinked at him. 

“That’s him? The ‘all star’ everyone’s talking about?” one whispered. 

Another nudged him. “Don’t stare at him for too long. Those eyes are creepy.” 

The one in front—the leader, presumably—puffed out his chest. “Caleb Xia. Are you alone? Where’s that baby sister of yours? You stalk her so much at school that I thought you’d never leave her side. Is she hiding behind you? Or did she go crying to that old lady?” 

“She’s…busy,” Caleb smirked, leaning against the doorframe, tilting his head. “Three guys against one small girl? That’s not fair. Sorry, you’ll have to deal with me instead. But let’s make this quick. I need to cook dinner soon—she gets nasty when she’s hungry.” 

He stepped out, closing the door behind him. The clouds were an endless expanse of gray. The telltale signs of another storm carved itself in the joints of his arm.

See? He had to do it. She wouldn’t have been able to take them all on her own. They would have all ganged up on her, using his name to provoke her. She would have been too consumed by rage to think about her actions. Then he would have to step in, protecting her while also fending them off. It wasn’t efficient. It was much better to just fight all her battles for her, so she wouldn’t be scared. A girl who was too scared to do things on her own, who could barely even win against him, who failed to hide her tears, who forgave and trusted too easily, would never be able to stand a chance against three bullies. He did the right thing. 

But he meant it when he said these three were nobodies. They looked just like everybody else—two eyes, four limbs, bad intentions. Standing close to them, he bet they didn’t even have any Evols. They didn’t exude any particular energy. All they had to offer was arrogance. It would be a swift victory, as expected. 

A minute later, Caleb was dusting off his hands while the boys laid in a crumpled heap at his feet. 

“H-huh?” one asked, wide-eyed. “How? Your Evol is…” 

“What kind of sick freak are you?” the leader shouted at Caleb. 

Caleb stuck a finger in his ear and twisted it. Damn, they were so loud and annoying. “Shut your traps. I only taught you a lesson.” 

The leader trembled. 

Here we go. Caleb crossed his arms. 

But then the leader bowed to the ground in a kee-tow, clasping his hands together in prayer. “Please, be our leader!”

What…? Caleb blinked. That wasn’t how it was supposed to go. 

“Yes, please! Teach us more!” the others followed. 

Caleb raised his hands, backing up. “Wait. I didn’t—”

“Please, give us a chance!” they tugged on his arms. “No one is as strong as you in our grade. With you on your side, we can finally take down that rival gang down the block!”

“Yeah, that sounds like a you problem,” Caleb sneered. “Get off me.”

“Please! You don’t have any friends yet, do you? We’ll back you up if you help us out.”

Caleb just gave them all blank expressions. Friends? He didn’t need friends. Especially with people so average. 

Especially when it wouldn’t last. Nothing ever did. This life was temporary. Someday, when it was over, Caleb would need to adjust and move on. Meaningless attachments only complicated the process. Caleb never understood why anyone clung to objects long after their initial use. He resented them.

The only one he needed, who he didn’t want to be temporary… 

“Ugh,” Caleb hissed, doubling over, an intense pain hitting the back of his head. The boys kept tugging, and for a brief moment, Caleb forgot why he had been resisting. It would just be for a little while… 

The sterile walls were closing in on him again, and he couldn’t remember what happened next. 

*****

Floating. He couldn’t feel anything. An encompassing numbness that rid him of all his senses. It should have scared him, but it was… relaxing. There was no pain. No emotions holding him back. Completely empty. What would happen, if he just… let it all go? Allowed the darkness to consume him? 

No one could hurt him if he had no knowledge to use. 

As he drifted along the current, transparent claw-like shapes scratched his arms—daring to pull him back, hold him down. They were taking from him, taking what was his. But they couldn’t. He wouldn’t let them. It was his, his, his. 

Power surged through him. He grabbed a wispy shadow and twisted it as far as it would go. He was surrounded by shadows and apparitions. He tore them apart, piece by piece. They disintegrated in his hold like rotten ash. 

He wasn’t prey. Nothing mattered to him but survival. 

He climbed upon the pile as the sole victor. Blood gushed in his ears. His heart struggled to keep up, jumping at the competition, the adrenaline of the hunt. Yes, this was how it should be. Limitless power, unstoppable. On top of the world—no, the universe. 

It was always the challenge. The challenge of hiding who he was, retraining himself within all the rules of society to play the role of the perfect boy. Sure, it was interesting for a while, finding creative ways to play with prey while concealing one’s true nature… but nothing compared to being free to let loose, reaching one’s full uninhibited potential. He had never felt so raw, so primal before. He was one with everything. A cosmic energy beyond anyone’s comprehension. 

But… what was that? He felt so… close to something, just within his grasp. But the closer he got, the more his skull seemed to ache. It rung around and around, and he knew he was losing something. Gradually. But what was it…?

“Caleb!”

A voice in the distance. The circle began to unwind. A hand reached out through the black hole of his mind—

“Caleb… Caleb! Xia Yizhou!” 

Caleb jolted. Josephine had grabbed him by the collar, shaking him. 

She had that look on her face… the same look she had when she found him grabbing the stray kitten by the neck after it had run away again. The same look she had when she walked in on him lingering outside the girl’s bedroom door in the middle of the night, thumbing through everything she touched. The look that said he would never be good enough to stand by the girl’s side. 

“What were you thinking? You could’ve gotten yourself caught!”

Caleb’s head lulled to the side. He finally noticed the three boys scrambling away. More laid on the concrete, their limbs spasming like electrocuted spiders. A robot droned by, flicking its red eye at Caleb. 

How did they get here? Did… he do that? He couldn’t remember a single thing. A different entity had taken over his body, snatching the reins. Sometimes it was a comfort, an escape from reality. Other times, he lost control. His personality split into two, playing an endless tug-of-war, unable to decide which side was the real him. The boy everyone saw him as, or the boy he was trained to be? 

“You’re already making such a fuss at school… the least you could do is lay low when you’re outside in the neighborhood so I don’t have to stress so much,” Josephine combed a hand through her hair. “You’ve heard the news. If you’re feeling off, don’t stray from your sister. You can’t protect her like this. You know that’s exactly what they want… to get you unstable and alone. I don’t trust those robots anymore than you do. They must be tracking energy levels for anomalies…” 

Caleb snapped out of it. He pushed Josephine off him. “You’re worried about me, or yourself? You’re just like them. You and your damn notes.” 

“I’m just… trying to understand you better,” Josephine groaned. “But you’re not making it easy.”

“Yeah, yeah. I can never live up to her. You’ve made that clear,” Caleb walked away. “All I did was not fail. Why so disappointed? You taught me failure wasn’t acceptable.” 

“Caleb…” Josephine frowned, then glanced back at the broken kids, who were trying their best to crawl away. “Where is she, anyways? I’m surprised she didn’t come running after you herself.” 

Caleb stopped in his tracks. The gaps in his memories slowly came back to him. Along with it, what he had done. Hindsight after an impulsive action was such a bitch. 

He winced. “I… left her in the attic.” 

Josephine blinked. “The… attic?” 

She had that look again. But this time, her face achieved a new record of white. 

“What’s so wrong with that? It’s not any different from what you did to us. I was only shielding her from the crossfire. It was your idea to make sure she never finds out how I really am.” 

If she was locked up, no one else could get to her, and she couldn’t get to anyone else. It protected her from others, and himself. Isn’t that why cherished possessions were always shut tight? 

“Caleb, you… you can’t do that,” Josephine looked right and left. “I know we didn’t exactly teach you any morals, but there is an order to these things you need to follow. You’re only hurting yourself.”

“You told me to not get too close. That we couldn’t grow if we depended too much on each other.” 

“Yes! But… there is a middle ground. Who knows how much time you have. Isn’t it better to spend your time wisely with your sister instead of locking her away?”

Caleb frowned. He didn’t understand. Why was she always giving him such contradictory commands? He couldn’t keep up. This was why his personality couldn’t make up his mind. 

Josephine sighed. “Maybe one day you’ll realize. Just… let her out when we get home. You better apologize properly. Then I’m taking you with me to apologize to those kids and their parents. I already see several complaints in our future.”

As she dragged him to the house, the robot flashed its red light at them before moving on. 

*****

Caleb pushed open the door. He sucked in a breath. 

There she was, curled into a ball, her knees pulled tight to her chest, with glistening tears streaked down her face. With the light hitting them, they looked like crystals. 

Pretty… 

He shook his head. No, she wasn’t. He didn’t like these sadistic thoughts. They weren’t him. Couldn’t be him. 

Hide it. Hide it well. 

“Pip-squeak?”

But she didn’t respond. A shot of fear struck through him. Oh god, what had he done? But he had known, hadn’t he? Known she was scared. But he thought her being safe would overpower that. He really had no other thought behind it. 

He hadn’t felt guilt. Hadn’t even questioned it. He just wanted her to be safe. He thought it was the best option. But in the end, he only did what everyone else had done to her, didn't he? 

He was just as dangerous as the ones trying to hurt her. 

He was fooling himself. She wasn’t the one who was scared. It was him. He was losing her. It was completely out of his control. She was the only one who could save him from the darkness. The only one who could prevent him from losing himself completely. Because without her, he was… a monster. 

He sighed. If Pip-squeak didn’t work, then there was another name that would… and he always hated saying it. He never liked calling her a name that wasn’t one he’d given her on his own. He didn’t want to call her a name that was forced upon her by the people that caused them fear. 

“Meimei…” Caleb whispered. Baby sister. 

Calling her sister had become a habit after having to say it so long in front of others. Eventually, it became a way to coax her. 

Finally, she looked up at him, sniffling through her tears. 

“Do you… not see me as your sister?” she croaked. 

“What?” Caleb blinked. The second time he was caught off guard today. 

She buried her face back into her knees. “It’s just… I’ve noticed you don’t really call me that, unless it’s to make fun of me. Whenever people call us siblings or family, you can’t look me in the eye and get all upset. So… do you hate me? Do you not see me as family?”

Caleb laughed. The question was so absurd. “That’s not it at all…” 

“I know you prefer English and your Western name, but Zayne’s family is so much more intimate than we are…” she looked back at him, her eyes tearing up again. “If… if we’re not family, then what are we?” 

Caleb dashed towards her, pulling her into his arms. “I’m never leaving your side, Pip-squeak. We don’t need labels. But… if it would put you at ease, I’ll start calling you my sister more. So don’t cry.” 

Yeah, who cared about all the eyes on them, the label they were forced to live with? It was none of their business. They would make it whatever they wanted to be. Everything else can come later. 

She had relied on him in the past. Clung to him. Sought him out. He was her protector. He’ll always be her protector. What did it matter what form that took? That was the first promise he made to her. And he wasn’t going to let that be the one that was broken. 

It felt silly now. His avoidance. Why was he even fighting it? If she won’t look at him in any other way, if it was the only way he can maintain his relationship with her… then… 

He had sealed their fates. There was no going back. She pulled him by the chain wrapped around his neck. He would be her brother until the day this all finally ended. 

“I thought you sent me to the attic because you were embarrassed by me…” the girl laughed. “You haven’t been around much. It felt like you were avoiding me.”

Caleb shook his head. “I kept my distance so you would be bullied less. Even without me, you still have Grandma. I have no one. You’re all I have. If anything, you’re the one leaving me behind.” 

He had thought that she still was far behind him. But the truth was, he could never dream to get on her level. 

He wasn’t ahead. He was behind, always behind her. She shone brightly while he still wallowed in the dark. He could never live up to expectations, could never let go of his attachment. No. He was the one who couldn't get a hold of her anymore. 

Why won’t she lean on him anymore? Why couldn’t she see she needed protecting? He could protect her better than anybody else. This proved that she couldn’t handle everything on her own. So why… why did she keep avoiding him and going to others? He used to be the first person she clung to. But now she had other people in her life, and he was still walking in her shadow. Never good enough. 

“You have Grandma too,” the girl said. “I wish you could see that.” 

“Nah, you’re her favorite,” Caleb poked her cheek. Then whispered. “Why did you do it? If you were that scared.”

Why listen to me?

He didn’t deserve it. His desperation to protect had put those tears in her eyes, the scars in her mind. He could never erase that part of him. 

“Because I trust you,” the girl said without hesitation. “Because I wanted to prove myself to you, so you wouldn’t have to worry about me anymore.” 

No, he was the one who needed to prove himself. 

His hands clenched. He almost lost her again. He wasn’t sure if he even ever had her in the first place. He knew… he knew the right thing to do was to let her grow stronger without him. He couldn’t be there forever, and she needed to stand on her own toes for when their paths inevitably crossed again so that they could still be equals… so that, when they fought each other, it would be as true opponents. 

But… he never intended for her to be the one to leave him. 

And yet, even now, she looked at him. Really looked at him. He still had her. He had gone crazy for no reason. Those eyes saw something in him that he couldn’t see. He was worried if she looked for even a second longer, his whole act would crumble and she would see him for who he truly was, rather than the person she thought he was. He wanted her to keep seeing someone else in him, a good part he didn’t know he had, forever. 

No one else would give him this second chance. She’s the only one who accepted him. He had to make sure he didn’t ruin it again, that she wouldn’t throw him away once she saw all his ugly parts. 

“Oh,” the girl rushed out, her eyes widening. “Do you really think that someone else will steal me away? Zayne is… just a friend, you know. I admire him.”

Then why are you blushing with that dreamy look in your eyes as you mention him? 

Caleb swallowed. “And those girls… I don’t even know who they are. You’re the only girl who matters to me. And you’ll always be the only girl.” 

“Seems like we misunderstood each other again,” the girl giggled. “Will our lives ever be not filled with misunderstandings?” 

Caleb pushed her shoulder. A sweet silence descended upon them. 

The girl yawned. “Gege… can you read me a story?” 

Caleb quirked an eyebrow. “A story? How old are you, again?”

“Please. Grandma’s been reading to me.”

“…Fine. Which one?”

“This one.”

The girl revealed a book that she had been hiding behind her back. She must have been browsing through the books stocked up in here while she was locked in. 

Caleb looked at the cover, his expression unreadable. She bit her lip, nervous he would refuse her again… but he opened the book. 

“Once upon a time, there lived a hero…”

If she was the hero, then did that make him the villain? 

“You’re my hero, Caleb.” 

Caleb’s eyes widened. 

Such a precious opportunity, yet also a heavy burden. Would he ever live up to that role? Could he? It was his fault she was stuck here. He never even had the chance to properly apologize to her yet. But she thought he had come to rescue her, and he hadn’t wanted to disappoint her. He was still lying to her, as always. Would the lies ever end?

But when he turned his head for answers, she had already fallen asleep against his shoulder. 

“Then you’re my savior.” 

He whispered, kissing the top of her head.

#####

Since this kinda gets addressed— In my fic, the reason why MC only sometimes says “gege” is because she is technically still unused to the term after saying “Caleb” for so long at the shelter and lab, even if she doesn’t remember those times well. It is also because English and saying their Western names is encouraged to prepare for the “real world” and international relations. This is to make sure their Western and Chinese names can be used together for both types of audiences.

She says “gege” whenever she has a demand or is scared/goes to him as a brother.

She says “Caleb” whenever she gets super personal (speaking to Caleb as a person, rather than just her brother—ironically, whenever she’s feeling closer than family), angry, or serious.

He sighed. Ignoring the carrot, he prodded at the meat with his chopsticks. Focus on the food, not the girl. His mouth opened, but the food never touched his tongue.  

Something cold landed on his cheek. It slid down, dropping onto the table below. A glop of mashed potatoes. 

“Whoops,” a cool voice stated. “My finger slipped.” 

Zayne shifted his eyes to the chair next to the girl, where the glare of Caleb’s chopsticks pointed at him. 

“Xia Yizhou!” a stern voice came from the head of the table. “What did we say about playing with your food?” 

Caleb’s eyes flashed, then dimmed. “Playing with prey is not efficient unless the goal is to cause prolonged suffering with a confession or coercion in mind. But you must not attach any emotion behind it. Before I get too attached, I must go straight for a swift end.”

His voice sounded so… robotic. Like he was repeating something that had been told to him over and over again. The room fell silent. 

Josephine cleared her throat. “Yes… what he means is, you shouldn’t get attached to food you’re going to eat. Procrastination makes it go cold.” 

Zayne tilted his head. That explanation didn’t sound quite right. 

“Oh, Caleb! You can be so serious sometimes,” the girl chimed in, breaking the tension with her perky voice. “You’re still a kid. Stop rushing into military school without me!”

Caleb blinked, and the fog in his eyes disappeared as he turned to face the girl, his shoulders relaxing. His frown slowly twitched upwards, although there still remained a solemness to it. “My bad, Pip-squeak. I must have forgotten my manners again.”

Josephine clapped her hands. “That’s right! You must forgive him. Caleb had a… troubled upbringing that he’s never been fully able to get rid of. I keep telling him how to behave around others, but he still has not fully assimilated to society. Nothing sticks with that one. He has a hard time focusing.” 

The lab. Zayne traced the edge of his plate with his chopsticks, scraping at the bits of food. 

“Poor dear,” Zayne’s mother said, shaking her head. “You know, Josephine, if he ever needs help, we know a few good psychiatrists.” 

Caleb’s hands shook, his grip tightening around the chopsticks until his knuckles turned white. Raising it high, he then slammed the blunt edges down, stabbing the chopsticks through the meat, until the red myoglobin juice seeped out. It shouldn’t have been possible, but somehow Caleb was able to turn anything into a weapon. “No. Doctors.”

His gaze stayed on Zayne as he said that. Zayne gulped. 

“Ahem,” Zayne’s father interrupted. “This food is… rather bland. No seasoning?” 

Zayne’s mother nudged him with a shush, but Josephine waved it away. 

“No, not in this house. Caleb has sensitive tastes, you see. He does not appreciate herbs, especially cilantro. So we avoid spices.” 

“Oh, that sounds like our Zaynie!” Zayne’s mother perked up, eager to find something in common to talk about. She gestured to the lone carrot on Zayne’s plate. “He cannot stand cross-contamination. And while he eats healthily, he will never touch carrots. Such an odd preference for a boy who usually has none…” 

“They don’t taste like anything,” Zayne defended himself. “And when they do, the taste is… artificial. But what bothers me the most is the appearance. It simply just does not look edible.”

Zayne poked at the carrot with his chopsticks again, grimacing. It was almost enough to make him gag. 

Zayne’s mother tapped her chin. “Although, it’s strange. He didn’t used to feel so vehemently about carrots until… you know. That’s also when he developed a liking towards sweets. A boy who never once cared about food, now suddenly being picky…” 

“That is not entirely the case,” Zayne insisted. “Just… I rather taste something, than nothing at all. Sweets have stronger tastes. But it’s not like I only eat sweets. I’m not a small child.” 

The girl giggled. “That’s funny. You look the type to have a strict diet. Who would’ve thought? You always beat expectations.” 

“It’s not that amazing,” Caleb rolled his eyes. 

“You say that, but your tastes are actually similar to his,” the girl flicked his forehead. “You can’t survive without lemons.” 

“It’s the only thing that makes him concentrate,” Josephine sighed. “Since he refuses to see a doctor, it is our only solution.” 

Caleb swatted her hand away. “They go down easier than the green stuff does. But they have just enough pinch to keep my senses awake.” He turned his gaze back to Zayne, searing holes into his forehead. “Besides, lemons just pass the time. My real favorite is apples. They bring us together while keeping the… bad people away.” 

“Yeah, apples suit you more,” the girl patted his shoulder. Then turned back to Zayne. “While Zayne is… more like a pear. Narrow, but also round, and sweet, even though he looks more like a vegetable. Apples and pears can both be green, but they taste very differently. Apples can surprise you with their bitterness.” 

“Dummy, what are you even going on about?” Caleb looked at her like she grew a second head. Then gazed Zayne up and down. “Hm. Though his head does look like a pear, doesn’t it?” 

“Excuse me?” Zayne was having trouble keeping up with this conversation. 

The girl chuckled, then slammed her hands over her mouth to hide her bursts. “I mean… it’s a compliment, Zayne! We’re calling you sweet.” 

“Sure,” Caleb shrugged, utterly unimpressed.

“Anyways,” the girl piped back up, “If you don’t like carrots, I can eat them for you.” 

I don’t need a nanny!

“Hey. No stealing food from others,” Caleb pinched her cheek. “I already give you my cilantro. You don’t need to eat his carrots. He’s a growing boy.” 

“So are you, Caleb!”

“Yeah, but only you can eat my cilantro. No one else. I can’t have you swapping jobs on me.” 

“Perhaps you both should look in a mirror and take care of yourselves first before worrying about somebody else,” Zayne said, pointing to his mouth. “You got crumbs all over your cheeks. How can you possibly eat like that? Do you even chew your food?” 

The girl sulked in her seat. Caleb scowled at him, placing his hand over the back of her chair. “Right back at you.” 

Zayne blushed. He had forgotten. He quickly wiped the smudge on his cheek with a napkin, looking away from them. He really had no idea what was coming over him. He only wanted to remove the attention from him to something else. Zayne crumpled the napkin as he thought about her downtrodden face once more. 

The gentle white noise of the TV on the wall flickered then blared as the channel entered a news segment. 

“We have reached a groundbreaking discovery regarding the ancient civilization, Lemuria!” 

All three adults paused mid-bite. Josephine peeked at the girl, whose face was scrunched in concentration. “Lemuria? What’s that?”

“You don’t know what Lemuria is?” Josephine blinked, her fingers twitching around her chopsticks. The girl shook her head as the news continued. 

“According to reports and photographic evidence from Xander Sciences, a leading research facility in Lemurian studies that has replaced the faulty Gaia Research Center, Lemuria does exist! It is believed that the climate changes of the Catastrophe had caused the tides to rise and thus revealed ruins of the abandoned city near Hat Island, the long rumored resting place of Lemurians. The only question is… where are they now? Do Lemurians still exist? Scientists are currently scouting the land for samples. It is expected that this can create head waves for Protocore technology. However, it is advised you do not venture into the area for now, as Hat Island has become overrun by Wanderers and fluctuations. The Hunters Association plans on calling it a no-hunt zone similar to the infamous N-109 Zone, the scene of the crime, so tourism at this spot has been shut down indefinitely as the hunters and Xander Sciences take care of matters.” 

“Oh… I feel strange,” the girl mumbled. “Like we just lost something important. But I can’t place it.” 

“There’s no need to stress if you don’t know anything about it in the first place,” Caleb covered her ears. “It’s bad for your heart.” 

“Those fools,” Josephine mumbled. “Those resources are fragile and limited. They never should have been touched.” 

“EVER must be using Xander Sciences in the same way that they were using Gaia,” Zayne’s mother mused. “Which means no one will be allowed near the project without facing consequences.”

“Gaia… isn’t that part of the team you used to lead, Ms. Zhang?” Zayne asked. “So you must know a lot.”

Josephine stiffened. “Yes… I suppose you can say that. But it was a long time ago. I’m no longer a scientist.” 

“But then you can confirm or deny the rumors. Did Gaia really start the Catastrophe and conduct illegal experiments?”

Josephine glanced at the girl and Caleb. They both carried blank stares, as if they weren’t even present in the conservation. Zayne had a hunch it must have been linked to the amnesia the girl exhibited—a defense mechanism to block out anything that had occurred there. But was it natural, or induced? 

“Zayne… that’s not polite,” his mother warned. 

“It’s only natural for him to be curious,” Josephine sighed. “But yes, that’s confidential information. I’m afraid I can’t indulge you.” 

That is just as good as a yes. Zayne turned his gaze back to the TV. “Science shouldn’t interfere with nature. It should only be used to help it, not harm it. Harming it can upset the order and make humans lazy. That’s what Dr. Fang taught me. That’s what I believe.” 

Josephine smiled sadly at him. “Yes… it was wrong for science to have interfered in the first place. But humans are greedy creatures. They wish to live. Become equal. Achieve the impossible. So they’ll find any method they can to ensure that. But that’s what makes Protocores so dangerous.” 

Everyone nodded in agreement… except for Caleb, who finally fixed his gaze on them. “I don’t think they’re dangerous.” 

They all turned their heads to him. “The world has always been unfair. None of us asked for this to happen. But now that it’s happened, we have to make the most of it, or else all the suffering we are going through would be for nothing. You have to take that suffering with your own hands and build something new. That’s how we grow as a race. If Protocores can help us achieve our full potential as limited human beings… if they can solve all of our problems…” Caleb’s voice trailed off into a whisper as his gaze shifted to the girl, gritting his teeth, “Then doesn’t that make them good? We’ve already been exposed to them. It’s part of who we are now. No sense in defying progress if that is our only option. Instead of holding back our base desires, shouldn’t we focus on satisfying them so they don’t run rampant? Does following our desires and wanting to live as the best version of ourselves really make us monsters?” 

Caleb placed his hand over his heart, as if proving a point. Zayne looked down. “But it never should’ve existed in the first place if it had remained untouched. Those monsters—”

“That’s not our fault,” Caleb said. “The blame lies within the people who created it, not the beings who were born from it against their will. If you were to root out the problem, we can overcome all of that.”

“Your views are dangerously similar to EVER’s,” Zayne narrowed his eyes. 

“Perhaps,” Caleb tilted his head. “At first sight, maybe. But there’s more layers to my views. I believe in progress if it helps my own interests, but I’m against scientists just as much. Maybe one day you’ll understand that Protocores have more value than you give them.” 

“Ugh, my head hurts!” the girl screeched. “It’s bad enough that Caleb talks weird, but now I have to deal with two boys who talk like Einstein?”

Zayne’s father coughed. “Indeed. Zayne has always been a child genius, but I didn’t expect your grandson to be so into politics, Josephine.”

“Well…” Josephine tugged on her collar. “You know how it is… he can’t keep it in sometimes. He isn’t aware that those views can get him hurt if he speaks so casually about them.” 

Caleb blinked, rubbing the back of his head. “Sorry, Pip-squeak. I keep getting carried away today, huh? I promise I’ll make it up to you later.” 

“On that note, perhaps we should get going,” Zayne’s mother pushed her chair back from the table and stood up. But when she moved to the door, the wind howled from outside, and a cascade of white blocked the windows. 

“Oh my, it’s really coming down,” Josephine frowned. “Must be part of the climate change. We used to rarely ever get snow, but now snowfalls are becoming more common, even in summer.” 

Zayne could feel his parents gazing at him. His face heated up. 

“Yes… all the more reason why we should go. Thank you for the meal, Josephine. Remember our offer about Caleb, though. If he ever changes his mind,” Zayne’s father scrutinized him wearily. 

“Hm, perhaps you should stay,” Josephine said. “I’d hate for you to be out in this weather. We have a guest room and a sofa.” 

“Oh no, we couldn’t impose any further,” Zayne’s mother waved her hands. “The meal was already more than enough.” 

“Why not? Sleep overs can help with engagement. Zayne and Caleb need more time to get used to each other, and I’m sure once Caleb gets more familiar with Zayne he’ll turn it down a few notches.”

Zayne’s mother bit her lip as she glanced at Zayne, then outside. “I…”

“If I’m the issue, then I promise to behave myself,” Caleb spoke. “Zayne should stay.”

“Oh, yes! Caleb has been so eager to start cooking. Since Zayne has delicate tastes, he should find out more about what dishes to make for next time.” 

Stay? Next time? But all Zayne could say was, “You cook?”

With those horrible manners and disrespect for food? 

“Why, is that surprising? Gran says the quickest way to someone’s heart is through homemade meals. I’ve also heard you always remember a good meal,” Caleb blinked innocently at Zayne, then gazed at the girl beside him. A certain look entered his eyes as his voice went a tad lower, “I wanted to test if that was true.” 

Maybe it’s just me. 

Zayne’s ears were ringing. He swallowed, but it wasn’t enough. His mouth was so dry. His face was steadily growing hotter, but at the same time, a chill enveloped his hands. The snow outside was harsh, the frantic dance mirroring the turmoil inside him. He was one with the snow. 

“Zayne… what’s that on your arm?” her voice broke through the haze. 

Zayne jolted in his seat. Both siblings were gazing at something below him. He followed their gaze to find that his sleeve had rolled back, showing a peek of black patterns encasing his wrist. He yanked his sleeve down over it, tucking his arm away. He averted his gaze. “M-mind your own business for once, will you? Hasn’t anyone told you it’s rude to stare?”

Her eyes widened. She looked down, fisting her hands on her lap. He swore he could hear a light sniffle from her. Caleb shifted his gaze from Zayne’s wrist to narrow his eyes at him. 

Ugh, another thing I’ll have to apologize for later.

“God, we can’t even open the door,” Zayne’s father scratched his head after jiggling the knob to no avail. “Guess we have no choice in the matter, anyways.”

“Will the kids truly be alright?” Zayne’s mother fretted. 

Zayne took a few deep breaths before turning to his mother. “I’ll calm down. I’ll even take the sofa.” 

Staying here was a bad idea. 

But he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep if he didn’t solve this, and the adults were already moving to their arrangements, cementing the decision in stone. So he got up from his chair, taking a few steps towards the girl, but she had already hopped off and sped into a back room before he could ever reach her. 

She slammed the door shut behind her, leaving behind only the scent of jasmines in her wake. Zayne scrunched his nose. He only knew the scent because of his dreams. Why did she smell like jasmines? 

He looked down at his empty hands once more. That was the second time she evaded him today. And what felt like the thousandth time he had scared her or upset her accidentally over all. He sighed, clutching his open palm into a fist. Was this how Caleb felt? Always so close, but never fully able to grasp onto her? But then why did he still cling onto her? If she even evaded Caleb, her favorite person, how could he ever think he can repair their relationship? As if they even had anything to begin with. He wanted to kick himself. 

Zayne wanted to run after her… and do what, exactly? 

But he didn’t have time to answer that internal question. Caleb swiftly appeared in front of him, blocking him from the girl’s bedroom door. 

Zayne’s eyes shifted to the window as lightning flashed across the dark sky and thunder boomed. Thundersnow? That was weird. That never happened before whenever he caused the weather. But the air around him suddenly felt that much more dense… as if another force was colliding with his own Evol. 

He slowly moved his gaze back to Caleb, whose eyes seemed to flash along with the lightning. Surely not. The shadows and light played across his face, and his black hole eyes were sucking him in. It was more like when he had first seen the boy. Empty, dead. 

“I don’t like outsiders,” Caleb said simply. His voice was cold, monotone. Like he wouldn’t have bothered with this conversation, if it hadn’t concerned her. The voice struck through his heart, and it took all of Zayne’s willpower to suppress a shiver. He could feel it, the innate sense that something was wrong with this boy, the instinct he had when he met him. 

Zayne could affect the weather, but what were the odds the weather could affect Caleb? 

“I’ve noticed,” Zayne said, pushing his shoulders back in a brave front. 

“You need to earn the right,” Caleb hissed at him. “If she still doesn’t trust you, then you can’t approach her. And if I don’t trust you, I won’t ever let you approach her. And I’m much harder to please. The moment you screw up? You’re out. Hurt her again, and I’ll make sure your death is more painful. I won’t let you get in our way.” 

“I’m honestly surprised. I know you’re not one to care for others. Why are you so invested in her? And why are you so bothered by me?”

Caleb didn’t answer. He just continued to glare at Zayne, his mouth curling back as he let out a little growl. Zayne sighed, looking down. “Give me some time. If she is still scared of me by the end of this year, and if I can’t make things work, I’ll leave. Just let me focus on giving her joy this year.” 

That seemed to appease Caleb, for now. He gave a single nod. Before turning on his heel, he said over his shoulder, “I’ll give you some advice, just to help you out. You can’t force things. You’ve seen her condition. She needs to warm up to you again. So get some rest. Don’t take it too personally.” 

Then he disappeared behind his own bedroom door. Zayne frowned, tilting his head. Why on earth would Caleb of all people feel the need to give him advice? 

He wanted to go after the girl, to explain himself, to say something to her, but he didn’t know what, and she was probably fast asleep by now. She seemed the type. Unpredictable. Maybe Caleb had a point. 

Listening to his parent’s murmurs in the guest room, Zayne trudged his way to the sofa, where he would be sleeping. 

As Zayne laid down under the blankets, he glanced at the door that hid the girl from him. He popped in his ear buds, and turning on his phone, he selected a song. His ears rang as loud brass and percussion banged around in his head. A chaotic disorder of noise. To any other person, the music probably would’ve kept them up, but the sounds gave Zayne a sense of comfort as his eyes drooped to a close. 

Back at the hospital, while he had been still reeling from the shock, Zayne had found himself scrolling on his phone, desperate to distract his mind. The song had popped up on his feed—a heavy metal band, playing in the center of the Catastrophe. It was the first sound he heard besides the buzz at the hospitals. He had never bothered with music before, thinking all music was grating on the ears, and yet… he had come to cling onto this song in the middle of all the despair. 

Whenever he played the song before bed, his nightmares were usually held at bay. It drowned out the screams. Like a good luck charm. 

But now, as he glanced at the door once more, he discovered something else that could help him sleep at night. The sound of her breathing, the sound of her heartbeat. The sound of her by his side. 

He knew, without a doubt, that he couldn’t survive without sound again. 

*****

The winter break had come to an end as the new year drew to a close. Classes had started back up again, and Zayne was once again looking at his planners that he had been using since elementary school. He had hoped to accomplish some things before his inevitable move next year, but as he flipped through the pages, running his index finger over his neat handwriting, he passed by so many goals he failed to achieve. 

“Go to the Linkon New Year Lantern Festival and make a Linkon New Year's lantern." He had started writing in these planners as a way to… become “normal.” Zayne was a smart student, but he failed to understand human emotions and perspective, so his parents suggested he write stuff in the planner based on what other children his age did. He had tried his best, but he mainly used the planners to help plan out his agenda ahead of time, as he could not stand the chaos of the unknown and unpredictable, and thus often could not find the time to fit in extra activities, not that he even had any reason to go. It was all just a silly, foolish dream… but for some reason, Zayne found himself wanting to do all the things listed in his planner. A flash of a girl and her smile floated in his mind. He batted it all away. Letting out a long sigh, he closed his planner and fixed his gaze outside. 

Zayne’s house was situated in the suburbs, just before the town blended into tall skyscrapers. Over the past few months, he had come to know the path very well. 

Stepping out his door and heading down the steps, he then took a sharp turn to his right, and kept walking straight. He crossed three intersections, reaching the end of the block that opened back to the main city streets. At the edge was the park he passed almost every morning. 

The park was a fresh area of green. As he got closer, he could make out the specific trees and flowers. The shapes solidified—a brand new red swing set rested in the middle, surrounded by sidewalk. 

His vision wavered, overlapping with images of the past. The park reminded him of the encroaching vine on the rundown shelter walls, the swaying branches of a pagoda tree, the broken down swing set… 

Perhaps I should take her here someday, if we have time. 

He immediately shook his head. He had been acting strange ever since he met her, thinking of all the could have beens. He was going to leave, anyway. Why did he keep making promises he couldn’t fulfill? He wasn’t Caleb. 

He turned on his heel, going to his right once more and maintaining the single line until he reached the corner where a strip of various shops rested. Right before hitting the next major intersection, Zayne stopped in front of one of the shops. 

The jingle signified his entrance as he pushed open the doors. 

“Oh, Zayne! We were just about to feed them. Do you want to help?”

A series of barks and mews followed. Zayne silently approached a den of pets, but as soon as he rested his hands on the gate, the pets cowered into a corner and curled into balls. 

“Don’t give up, Zayne! Remember what we taught you.”

He had been coming here more frequently, ever since the wild animals returned. The living, breathing creatures and their noisy clamors provided a sense of comfort after months of silence. It reminded him of what they had lost, and what they had regained. He thought it best to not take life’s offerings for granted ever again. Ever since the incident, he had found himself appreciating life. Or perhaps more accurately, he simply wanted to learn how to appreciate life, what made life so special.

At any rate, his new fondness for noise had led his parents to mistakenly believe he must have an affinity to music, so they had been taking him to piano lessons for the past month. His liking to sound did not equal adept talent. Which was why the electronic keyboard they had given him for practice was only collecting dust. 

The pet shop staff talked amongst themselves as they watched Zayne struggle to get the animals to approach his hand filled with food. 

“Quick, quick! I swear I saw him go this way!” 

Zayne froze. He recognized that airy melody, the scent of jasmines that tingled his nose. 

“Remember, Zayne. They live just on the other side of town. The park splits us from the middle.” 

…Crud. 

Zayne immediately ducked behind a pile of boxes as the door jingled once more. 

When the door closed, Zayne peeked through a tiny gap to see two blurry figures come into focus. He squinted at them to get a better view. If he hadn’t recognized their voices, it would have been too late. His nearsightedness, mild myopia, had never given him much trouble before. But now he was wondering if he should invest in those everyday glasses his parents kept going on about, just so he would never be caught off guard again. It felt like his eyesight had only gotten worse since meeting those two. With glasses, he could remain more vigilant of his surroundings outside his books. He would get better at the game. 

“I don’t see anyone.”

“Aw, I was so sure he was here…” 

The girl pouted at Caleb. Caleb scratched his head. 

“Who did you even see…?”

“Zayne! Don’t you remember?”

Caleb frowned. “Doesn’t ring a bell.” 

Does he… truly not remember me? Zayne had been under the impression that only the girl had amnesia. But was Caleb simply hiding his own struggles, as per usual? He recalled the way he had looked at dinner, dissociated and robotic. Perhaps…

The girl sighed, interrupting Zayne’s thoughts. “I’m the one who is supposed to have the memory issues, not you. What am I going to do if we both forget?” 

“Well, at least we match,” Caleb ruffled her hair. “Although, I don’t like the idea of your memory getting better than mine. It’s been sticking more and more lately, huh?” 

She nodded. “But yours seems to be getting worse.”

“It’s because I have a lot to remember, if I want to make sure you don’t forget,” Caleb lifted one shoulder. “But I also just don’t care enough to remember anyone who isn’t you.”

Hm, so that’s the real reason. 

“Caleb!”

“It’s true. But I must say, who is this Zayne? I thought I was the only one who you would run to.”

“You really don’t remember? He was at our house a couple weeks ago. The family of doctors. Friends of Grandma.” 

Caleb’s brow furrowed. Then suddenly, his eyes darkened. “Pear head? You’re still obsessed with that guy? Didn’t he scare you with his whole high and mighty preacher act?”

Zayne grimaced. He didn’t know how to feel about that being his new nickname. He knew his surname was Li, but to describe his appearance as a pear itself…

“Yeah, well… he acts more like an adult than a child, which makes him seem scary, but… have you seen his eyes? I think he may be the same as us. Lonely. It makes me want to reach out to him, even though I fear him.” 

He sucked in a breath. He had noticed. Not from a distance, but whenever they were close. The way she would still tremble before him despite giving him a smile. The way her eyes glistened but she brushed it off with childish humor. He had deluded himself into thinking those tiny gestures meant he still had hope to repair things with her, to get closer to her and see if she can make him feel the same way she made Caleb feel. But he had to get rid of that fear for any real progress to be made. And how was he supposed to do that, when all she did was pity him? He must look more pathetic than he thought. His mask was slipping, or they saw through everything. 

Caleb bit his lip. “You think I wouldn’t notice? I can see it better than anyone else. But that doesn’t mean we need to shelter him with us. There’s not enough room for three.” 

As if I even wanted you to save me, anyways. 

“Can’t you try for me, Gege?”

“Where’s my ‘baby sister’ who begged me to come with her and hold her hand because she was too scared to wander the neighborhood by herself yet?”

She didn’t answer. Caleb sighed, looking around the shop. “He’s probably hiding somewhere, the coward. While we’re here, why don’t we get some food for the kitten?” 

The girl perked up. “And toys?”

“Sure, whatever you want, Pip-squeak. We’ll use up all the money Gran gave us.” 

The siblings dispersed, with Caleb coming closer to where Zayne was. Zayne shrunk himself even lower. He watched as Caleb grabbed one of the collars hanging from the shelf. He flicked his finger at the round bell in the center, which gave a soft ring. He peeked at the girl, which had wandered off closer to the pets, and stashed it inside his pocket. 

Zayne narrowed his eyes. But a sudden itch took hold of the tip of his nose, and he averted his gaze to sneeze into his elbow. When he looked back, Caleb was gone. 

“Where—?”

“Looking for me?” 

Zayne jumped, almost toppling the tower in front of him. Caleb snaked his arm around his torso and pulled him back to his chest. 

“Careful. You didn’t want to be caught by her, right?” He titled his head. “For someone who claims to know everything with just one single glance, you sure love to hide a lot. Are you scared to see something you don’t like?”

Zayne brought his elbow back, shaking Caleb off him. “I didn’t give you permission to touch me. Why are you even here?”

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that? She and I are nursing a stray kitten.”

“And that collar?” 

Caleb just grinned mysteriously at him. “She often gets into trouble when she’s out of sight. This way, I can know where she is if she’s in danger.” 

Zayne shivered. “Creep. Some animals like to be independent. You shouldn’t restrain them too much.” 

“Yeah, says the one spying on us,” Caleb rolled his eyes. “You don’t do a very good job at it, by the way.” 

“Caleb! You found Zayne? Not fair!”

Oh no. 

“Yeah, Pip-squeak. He’s right—”

Before he could finish, Zayne zoomed past them and rushed out the door, the jingle proving his exit. His ears turned red. 

If she ever mentioned this encounter to him, he would just pretend it wasn’t him she saw. But with any luck, she would have forgotten about this as well.  

Zayne came tumbling down, his knees skidding in the dirt. The ball that had hit him square in the chest rolled its way back to Caleb.

This is the boy who was tasked with watching us?

With a flick of his fingers, the ball shot up into Caleb’s palm. He stared at the snapped twig by Zayne’s feet, a puddle of dead leaves scattering in the air. “Too easy. Where’s the challenge? I can hear you coming from a mile away.”

Zayne coughed, spitting out a leaf that had gone into his mouth. Wiping his arm across his lips, he looked up, narrowing his eyes. “I thought this was just practice. Aren’t you taking this too far?”

Caleb finally met his gaze. He really hated those green eyes. “We’re in the middle of war. Don’t you have combat experience? You wouldn’t even survive on the battlefield. What a waste of time.”

Caleb wanted… no, needed to see him lose control. Just like that day. Anything to justify his hatred, his suspicions. The girl failed as a witness, so the only way Caleb could prove his own memory was with concrete evidence.

Those green eyes brought back to mind his first ever snowfall. The vivid white landscape broke through the gray fog that clouded all other thoughts. Blobs crowding his vision fell away into the initial few snowflakes dropping from the sky. The snowflakes then intersected and created an almond vesica that poked through that white, almost beautiful, curtain—staring into his soul, judging his very being. The white sharpened to a dark, vibrant green covered by black frost. The black frost quickly encompassed everything around it, once again concealing the world in an empty darkness, until nothing white remained. Caleb had never seen such an abundance of white and black before, consuming each other whole. A sign that they could never coexist without bringing mass destruction.

It took some time for Caleb to recognize those eyes, from a more distant past. Back then, the boy did not seem like a threat. A tall boy with round cheeks, not a hint of muscle to be found, untouched by strenuous labor. A boy who had not yet lost his innocence. He had kept his head down, trailing behind the trio of doctors, a duckling afraid to stray from the flock. Caleb had guessed he was shy, a typical boy of his age who followed the status quo like everybody else. Boring, dull. But then… why did the boy’s gaze follow him like a magnet, searing into him? He would look away, only to come dragging back, biting his lip as the doctors went on and on about treatment plans. Caleb kept his face straight, refusing to meet that gaze, the gaze that tore him apart.

Perhaps it was inevitable. The boy had strayed too far after all, despite having been so reluctant. His detour caused him to inadvertently fall right into Caleb’s path, and their eyes clashed at last. Caleb had been surrounded by green, transported from the makeshift infirmary to a silent forest. Even then, Caleb had hated those eyes—the judgment and the loneliness that reflected his own. He had hated them so much, that his own gaze transformed into a mighty glare. The boy jumped, bright eyes widening. A deer caught in headlights. Then his lips began to twitch, in what must have been some silly attempt of a sheepish smile, as he held Caleb’s gaze. Those eyes lingered on him for a few seconds longer, before vanishing behind the door. And he never saw the boy again.

With time, those eyes dissolved into the background, blending in with everyone else, tucked away into the space never perceivable by Caleb. The boy became nothing more than yet another lost piece in a massive, unsolvable, puzzle. Another fleeting encounter with no meaning. But that snowy day sent Caleb through time, unlocking the box that stored away his memories. Caleb had not gotten better at remembering faces. It was just that the snow had left an imprint on his soul. Zayne’s eyes burned him, each and every encounter, filling him with an emptiness that he did not want to fall into ever again. Not when he finally had crawled out of that abyss.

A challenge. A worthy opponent. Caleb longed to search for one. He had always been far above others. No one had ever come close. The adults had been so eager to control him, unable to meet his gaze, to see him as anything but a perfect weapon. Only the girl had seen him for who he truly was beyond that label, had looked him in the eye properly. It was so easy to fall under the delusion that he had met an equal, a perfect match, all his own. But now, there was someone who surpassed both of them. Someone else who could hold his gaze. He had been gravely mistaken to underestimate the boy. A mistake he would never make again. Caleb would prove to her that he was a dangerous foe, not a friend.

Zayne broke their staring contest. He stumbled up to his feet, brushing off the dirt from his firmly fitted pants—a stark contrast to Caleb’s loose jeans. Caleb despised stuffy clothing. Zayne leveled Caleb with his cool eyes once more. “They don’t give extensive training to middle schoolers. I am a genius, not a soldier.”

“Pity,” Caleb yawned. “Since you’ve taken those mandatory simulation courses, I thought you could prepare us for the real thing. That’s the only reason why I selected you to be the Wanderer.”

Zayne slouched forward, then recoiled. “Are you even human? I may not be well versed in children’s games, but I don’t think this is how they are supposed to go.”

“You already knew that,” Caleb tilted his head. “It’s too late to back out now. You had your chance, but you agreed to play with us. So you better hold up to that promise. I won’t forgive you if you don’t.”

Zayne opened his mouth, but he never got to speak. He was once again knocked off his feet, hitting the dirt.

“Score! That makes it a tie.”

The girl popped up from behind Zayne, twirling the slingshot around her finger.

“The longer we play, the more unfair this feels,” Zayne muttered.

“I dunno, seems fair to me,” Caleb grunted as he stretched his arms above his head, high as possible, teeter-tottering on his tip toes. He clasped his hands together in a pyramid and brought them behind his head in a laidback pose.

More than fair. He wasn’t even giving it his all.

“Oh, so you have to be hitting me with marble balls?” Zayne raised an eyebrow.

“Well, normally we use the flower petals, but that’s not fun. They don’t aim as well.”

“It’s also winter. Caleb suggested balls for better practice,” the girl frowned, lowering her slingshot. “But I didn’t expect you to fall after a single hit. They’re small and soft, so the impact should not be that hard. Who would’ve thought you’d be so… clumsy?”

Ugh. Caleb clutched at his chest, twisting the fabric of his shirt. That stupid organ screamed inside his chest, pulsing in his ears. A nuisance that had started ever since the shelter, persisting all the way to the city. He rubbed his chapped lips together then swallowed. His face grimaced ever so subtly as his gut bubbled, eating away at his flesh, rising up his tubes until it all threatened to spill out. He smoothed out his shirt, beating his chest as he cleared his throat. He didn’t like this vile feeling. Didn’t like how it affected him so much, how he could not escape. A million bugs had swarmed his mind, an endless buzz of screams, unable to be silenced if she wasn’t by his side.

I need to get him away from her. I can’t lose her again. Can’t lose sight of her again.

Caleb stepped over Zayne, ignoring Zayne’s yelp as he stomped a little too close for comfort. Once he reached the girl’s side, he stuck out his hand to her. “Let’s go, Pip-squeak. We don’t need him. We can play with just the two of us, like we always do.”

This was the part where she realized Zayne would not make a great playmate compared to him. She would view him as no one different from all the children who had avoided her in the past, and Caleb would be there to pick up the pieces. She would take his hand, and he would lead her away from Zayne for once and for all.

But the girl brushed past him, dodging his hand, leaving behind only a breeze in her wake. Wind slipped through the gaps of his fingers. The empty digits twitched, curling inwards, a claw that grasped onto nothing but a phantom. He squeezed his fist, turning it sideways, before falling down to his side. He lowered his head, staring at the space where she had escaped him.

The girl was now at Zayne’s side, bending over him, their foreheads practically touching. “How are you ever going to protect yourself without me? I’m going to have to keep a close eye on you at all times.”

Red painted his cheeks. Zayne scooted back from her, flailing his arms and legs in his desperate attempt to create more distance between them. As the girl blinked at him, brows furrowed, a nervous laugh erupted from his throat, which he covered up with a swift cough. “I’m the oldest one here. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?”

The girl rolled her eyes, snatching Zayne’s arm, preventing him from moving any further. Ignoring his protests, she gave the arm a few tugs before holding it limply and shaking her head. “Not with these skills. You may look terrifying, but you still have a long way to go.”

Now it was Zayne’s turn to blink at her, slowly. “I look… terrifying?”

“Yeah, because of your face,” the girl pointed at her cheek, using her finger to push the skin up. Zayne’s eye twitched. “Oh, but not as terrifying as a Wanderer… you’re not nearly strong enough…” she nodded, then hummed, tapping her chin. Her eyes lit up. “Maybe you could use your Evol! It’s against the rules, but Caleb’s been cheating this whole time anyways, so I’ll give you special permission. That should make things more fair, right? And even more realistic…”

Zayne’s face paled. “No!”

The girl startled, backing up from Zayne, dropping his arm. Zayne quickly brought his arm back to his chest, sucking in large gulps of air. His whole body shuddered with each heave. After rocking back and forth a few times, the trembles stopped, and he was able to get back up on his own. He swallowed, looking away from the girl. “Evols aren’t meant to be used so carelessly. Don’t you remember what Dr. Fang said? Too much abuse of power will put strain on your heart. I was tasked with keeping an eye on you to ensure that doesn’t happen. And I can’t guarantee nothing will go wrong when neither of us have much control over our abilities. So let’s end this here, before anyone gets hurt.”

The girl’s shoulders drooped. “But…”

“Don’t make me repeat myself,” Zayne swung his gaze back to her. His hands glowed. “If you find me terrifying now, you’ll see how terrifying I can really be.”

The girl took a step back, then another and another. She hiccuped, her eyes turning glassy, as she hugged herself like some kind of shield. “Gege…?”

Caleb blinked, snapping out of his daze, with just that one word. The noise in his head came to a quiet.

Brother. The title she had bestowed on him. Whenever their eyes met, whenever he rushed to her side and comforted her in his arms, she called him “Gege.” Big brother.

She had never called him that before. At the lab, at the shelter, he was just… Caleb. But after Josephine took them in, things had… changed. Their relationship became strained. It took a while to get her to look at him. And when she finally had… “Gege.” Brother.

That was the line she had drawn. The role she assigned him. And now, the life he lived by.

Her big brother.

And she… his little sister.

That word only made him want to scream.

She wasn’t his sister. They didn’t have parents. He may have been created from the essence of her, but he only saw that as a sign of their connection, their intertwined destinies and bonded souls. They were made from the same source, contained the same energy within their hearts, but they did not share the same blood.

Still, Caleb found himself moving forward. He slid in between them, blocking the girl from Zayne, giving a glower of his own. “Hey. You’re scaring her.”

His voice chilled the air. The oxygen around them swirled into a spiraling vortex, like a giant vacuum. Zayne gasped. The glow faded from his hands. He smacked his cheeks and averted his gaze once more. “I—I didn’t mean…”

Caleb’s lips morphed into a shit-eating grin. “My, my, have you been holding back on us, Zaynie? All because you’re scared of losing a little bit of control? Is that why you take those classes? No need to be responsible for our sakes. It’s not like you owe us anything, right?”

“Zayne… is that true?” she whispered. “You were holding back because you’re scared?”

Zayne hunched his shoulders, rubbing his arms, as if he were trying to wipe away something else. “That’s…”

“Come on, Zaynie,” Caleb took a step closer to Zayne. Zayne stumbled back, his eyes traveling from Caleb to the girl, and back again. “Give us a real show this time. Put those classes to proper use. Be the Wanderer I know you can be. If you’re uncomfortable with her, then you can just fight me one on one instead.”

“Caleb, I think you’re the one scaring him this time.”

“An eye for an eye,” Caleb drawled from over his shoulder. His gaze never left Zayne’s. “We’re still tied, aren’t we? Let’s make this the last round. No more holding back.”

“Huh?” she frowned. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Didn’t you say you wanted to quit, Caleb?”

“I changed my mind,” Caleb said, cracking his knuckles. He stretched out his slingshot, giving the rubber band a good smack. “I’m not finished whipping this Wanderer into shape.”

“Zayne, you were right. Talk Caleb out of this. You both wanted to quit!”

Zayne didn’t move his gaze to the girl again. Instead, he stayed fixed on Caleb. He mumbled under his breath, “This is ironic. Why must I be the Wanderer?”

“You’re backing out?” Caleb tilted his head. Zayne’s eyes wavered.

The girl nodded empathically. “Yes—”

“No,” Zayne sighed, interrupting her, hanging his head. “I’m not.”

The girl’s jaw dropped.

Zayne smiled apologetically at her. “How am I going to protect you, and myself, if I don’t try to get stronger? I can’t have you doing all the work for me.”

The girl pursed her lips. She squinted at Zayne, then let out a simmered groan, throwing her hands in the air. “Ugh, boys. Whatever. But no tricks this time, Caleb!”

Caleb rolled his eyes at her pointed finger. “Don’t worry, Pip-squeak. I won’t hurt him.”

Much.

“That’s not very reassuring,” she glared at him.

Caleb stuck his finger in his ear. “Blah, blah, blah. I can’t hear you.”

“You…!” the girl stomped her foot. Then swung her gaze back to Zayne. “Hey, Zayne, I know you’re the enemy, but how about we form a temporary alliance and get rid of Caleb?”

Zayne’s eyes widened. “Are you…”

Caleb already knew what he was going to say, and he wasn’t about to let him insult her any further. He was sick of that condescending attitude. Just like all the rest. Caleb clucked his tongue at her, cutting Zayne off. “Pip-squeak, you just said no tricks.”

The girl pushed her tongue out and wriggled it at him. “I’m planning ahead.”

“Fine. Enough chit-chat. No alliances. Let’s make this last round count and get this over with,” Zayne clapped his hands.

“Well-said. We can begin on the count of three, two…”

From the corner of his eye, the girl edged forward. Caleb’s lips twitched. He brought his hands behind his back, swiftly flicking a finger.

“One.”

“Xia Yizhou!” the girl shouted at him. “Put me down!”

The girl floated in the air, fighting off an invisible torrent.

Caleb didn’t look back at her. “Sorry, Pip-squeak. But I can’t have you taking my number one spot.”

Even though the lab was now far, far away… remembered only by blurry glimpses… the effects still lingered. The ingrained sense of competition, after months of brutal conditioning, raised to one day consume each other into oblivion, never left. Caleb needed to stay on top of his game. He couldn’t fall back. He especially couldn’t have her getting in his way.

Fate would always pit them against each other. It was inescapable. Caleb constantly lived reminder after reminder that they could never be together, that their coexistence was forbidden. He knew the very moment the girl said she’d become a hunter, their paths would eventually lead them right back to opposing sides.

It had been a shock when the girl announced the decision earlier that month. The three of them had been eating dinner, watching news on TV. The channel was doing a segment on the newly established Hunter’s Association. The reporter put great emphasis on the man behind it all, a figure only known by Lumiere.

“So… his name is Lumiere… and he’s a hunter?” the girl’s eyes sparkled.

“Why the sudden interest, Pip-squeak? He’s nothing special. I’m sure I’m a better big shot than he is.” Caleb squished her face, forcing her head away from the TV.

“Don’t talk about him like that! He saved my life!” she smacked Caleb away, a fierce glare in her eyes. Caleb’s eyes widened ever so slightly.

“Saved your life? What do you mean?” Josephine’s chopsticks paused before it could reach her mouth.

The girl shrunk back in her chair. “Well… I still don’t remember much… but, yes, I’m sure I met him. Before the shelter, I had been wandering the streets, and he saved me from Wanderers.”

She turned her gaze back to the TV, landing on a recruit ad for hunters. She nodded. “Yes… I think… I want to become a hunter! Then maybe one day… I can see him again… and thank him properly.”

Caleb scoffed, crossing his arms, tucking his chin to his chest as he slouched in his chair. “How very noble. He probably doesn’t even remember you. Didn’t you hear? He’s saved half the population.”

“I… am not so sure if that’s a good idea,” Josephine cleared her throat. “Being a hunter means extensive use of your Evol, and you’d be exposed to Wanderers on a daily basis. It’s not safe for you and your condition.”

“I’m not giving up on this. If my heart is the problem, then… I’ll go to that doctor you mentioned. I promise to find a way around that! I don’t want to be seen as hopeless anymore.”

Josephine sighed. “If you’re so determined…”

“You’re agreeing with this?” Caleb whispered. “You’re not gonna fight her on it?”

Josephine spared him a glance. Then put down her chopsticks and took out the notebook she always carried with her, clicking her pen. “Ana… what exactly do you remember of your encounter with this Lumiere?”

Caleb narrowed his eyes on her. Old habits died hard.

Caleb must work even harder to surpass her, to protect her. Being a hunter meant she was putting herself at risk. EVER would eventually catch wind if she truly achieves enough, and then…

Caleb clenched his fists, grinding his teeth together. Zayne had already turned heel and ran as soon as Caleb had trapped the girl.

That’s why he pushed her away. He wouldn’t jeopardize everything this time. Her chosen path had only bound him to his promises even further. Promises—once a blessing, but now… a curse. A cruel reminder that the happiness he tasted with her was fleeting and not meant to last forever.

The whispers of greatness had caressed him when he was at his lowest. He had been so desperate to forget his loneliness, so desperate to belong, that he didn't even stop to care if they were all lies… even now, he struggled to answer if he truly regretted it or not. He couldn’t find himself to feel shame, but this looming anxiety of the future ahead unnerved him. Whether his decision was born out of naivety, he would soon learn.

Caleb had done his research ever since he made up his mind to become a pilot. He would need to go to Skyhaven. Once he established himself there, he would regain the attention of those who have been seeking his uses. But while the pilots and hunters had similar goals of managing the Wanderer crisis, they often butted heads due to their different allegiances.

His bed was already made. Standing firm on this path, he was heading straight back for the lion’s den. After so long of breaking free from their grasp, he was running into the arms that still haunted his nightmares. But instead of the broken boy, they would be welcoming a fellow leopard. He needed to do this, needed to be on their side. He had to ensure he outshone the girl in everything, so when the time came, he could eliminate all threats before they could even reach her. Stick to the plan, or risk losing everything again. After finally living a life with her, Caleb didn’t want to let it go. Life carried too much meaning to him now.

She was his only weakness. The one variable that would always make him stumble, who would throw everything off base. So no matter how much she wanted him to stay, and how much he wanted to stay… he couldn’t. Nothing would change the choices they have made.

Now… it was time to focus.

Caleb dug a hand into his jean pocket, pulling out a small wrapper in yellow. It wasn’t the real thing, but it was all he could fit into his secret stash without going bad over time. He shed off the wrapper and popped the object into his mouth, the burst of sour hitting his tongue once more. That’s better.

Smacking his lips around the candy, he took a step forward—only for a shard of ice to rise up from the ground right in front of him. Caleb put his foot back and glared at Zayne. Looks like someone’s finally not holding back.

Zayne shook his arm, black specks fading in and out over his flesh. “Do you always suck on lemon drops before your attacks?”

Caleb narrowed his eyes. So, he managed to find an opening after all. He spoke around the candy, “Says the one who can be easily bribed with the promise of dessert.”

Zayne wasn’t the only one looking for weaknesses.

“That wasn’t…!” Zayne raised his voice, but cut himself off just as abruptly, grimacing. “I don’t understand how you can just stick to one flavor. My taste buds ache from looking at you. Isn’t it better to taste something different each time?”

“I hate surprises,” Caleb said simply, staring at Zayne. He then tilted his head, rolling the candy between his teeth, then tucking it back in his cheek before it could crack under pressure. “You don’t have any favorites?”

Zayne scratched the back of his head. “I like uniqueness. Even if they look the same on the surface, not one thing can taste exactly the same. In that sense, none can be compared to the other. It wouldn’t be fair. Despite all being ‘sweet,’ there are different degrees of sweetness. The only constant is the release of endorphins. So taste never matters because they all taste good…”

Caleb blinked. “I thought you were quiet. But you actually talk too much. What kind of weirdo reason is that?”

Zayne slapped a hand over his mouth. Then narrowed his eyes on Caleb. “And you bite on lemon drops. You can crack a tooth like that. I believe odd eating habits are a sign of—”

“I’m not here to get diagnosed, Doctor. Especially by one as hypocritical as you,” Caleb interrupted. He bared his teeth at Zayne, poking the candy out with his tongue, then ground it between his teeth again, until it started to crunch. Zayne’s eye twitched at the display. Caleb took that moment to step forward, raising his slingshot and quickly firing at Zayne. Before the ball could reach his face, Zayne shielded himself with his arms, a wall of ice forming in front of him. The ball bounced off the barrier, rolling back to Caleb’s feet.

“Now that’s the fight I was looking for,” Caleb whispered. Something surged inside of him. A rapid flutter of wings, soaring higher and higher, desperate to keep on moving forward. It was the rush of air as the bird swooped down, unsheathing its talons and digging the sharp nails into the flesh. Sinking deeper, and deeper still, until the squelch came, and spurts of red leaked out from its holes.

“Let this be the start of your lessons… if you want something, you take it. Weakness lies with your inability to hold onto possessions. If you spoil them too much, sit around and just wait, they’ll eventually fly away. Discipline and dominance is needed to keep them grounded. Don’t be kind. Show them fear.”

“Urk,” a small noise filled his ears, squeezed out from a tight restraint. Caleb blinked, a shudder going through his body. Zayne was now lying on the ground beneath him. He gasped for breath as Caleb’s fingers dug into his wrists, pressing his arms into the dirt above his head.

Whoops. He got carried away again.

“Caleb? Zayne? Are you alright? Do I need to go over there?”

“No,” Caleb replied coolly. He twisted Zayne’s skin ever so slightly. Just a tiny pinch. Sweat dripped down Zayne’s arms. “I’ve won, so why don’t you take a small break while Zayne and I have a heart to heart? I want to get to know him better.”

Caleb could only hold her for so long. The girl would break free from his Evol at any moment. But he wouldn’t allow interruptions. As soon as he felt a tug on his concentration, a kick to the barrier he had put up, he jerked his upper torso to the side, and the girl landed in a nearby bush, entangled with a bunch of leaves.

“As soon as I get out of this, you’re so dead, Xia Yizhou!”

Caleb sighed. “I wish you could trust me more, Pip-squeak. I promise I’ll make it up to you later.”

His voice sounded cheery, with a playful lilt to it, similar to a sulk. It was behavior that perhaps suited a puppy. Except, the face did not match the tone. The gaze was more cat-like in nature, observing his prey before him, waiting to pounce. Zayne gulped.

Caleb leaned in closer, his forehead practically touching Zayne’s, just like the girl had done seconds before. This close, Caleb could pick up on the pitch of Zayne’s breathing, short and sporadic. From the grip on his wrists, he could feel the rapid pulsing of his heartbeat. Interesting. Who knew the block of ice had a heart? But that didn’t matter. It didn’t change anything.

Caleb leaned in further still, his lips barely grazing Zayne’s ear. He rolled the candy between his teeth again, until it finally gave way. “Do you know why I suck on lemon drops?” he bit down with a deliberate crunch. “It aids the hunt.”

Caleb could feel small bumps form along Zayne’s skin as Zayne shivered. “It would seem your family has an issue with boundaries.”

Caleb finally backed away, scoffing. “Who broke those boundaries first, I wonder?”

Zayne blinked. The skin got colder underneath Caleb’s fingers. Prickles stung his tips and crawled towards his palms, but Caleb kept his hold. Something inside of Zayne was rising up to match Caleb’s own monster. “Does your sister know who you really are? Do you ever get tired, putting on that act of yours?”

“Watch it,” Caleb said lowly, his eyes becoming vacant. “You only just appeared. I’ve been with her since the beginning.”

“But…you can’t have her,” Zayne wheezed out. The air had gotten thicker. Just like that day. “Why bother clinging onto her like a lost puppy, using all methods to get her attention, only to push her away in the end? Your ambitions can’t become reality if you just let them soar into the sun.”

“And what would you know? Stay out of our business, interloper,” Caleb sneered at those green eyes.

“Is it because she forgets—”

“Shut up!” Caleb yelled. “It doesn’t matter if she forgets. As long as I can keep getting her attention. Even if she forgot… I didn’t.”

Caleb had been trapped all his life, living by other people’s orders. Never once had he been capable of living his own life on his own terms. Freedom was a foreign concept. A fragile creature with a devastating end. It was the heartbeat underneath his fingers, using every last muscle to pump out whatever blood it could muster. It shook with each pump until eventually it withered and beat no more. It was watching his palms bruise black and blue from the way he had grasped on too tightly, the screeches and flapping wings, the snaps and bits.

The feeling had infected his veins, boiled in his own blood. It was the constant whisper in his head.

“Take this as part of your lesson… those captured can never be free. They won’t survive the wild on their own. It’s eat, or be eaten.”

He did not want the same devastating end. One second, he was holding life in his hands. He carried the full authority. But the next, he was the one whose life was being snuffed out by a higher power, helpless against the master. Always chasing after the illusion of choice, something that he could never fully achieve. Each decision he made, each path he took, every place he went, just led him into another trap.

I just want to be free… Free.

It’s why he had wanted to take to the skies, go to a place where no one could reach him.

She was the only one he could truly call his own. The only one he could recognize in the endless fog. She had been his the moment he was created. It had always only ever been her. Without her, he would never have existed. Their connection wasn’t just spiritual, it was corporeal, tethering them to this plane of existence. His identity revolved around hers. They couldn’t be separated.

But they could never be free together, could they? Their fates meant they could not coexist. The peace they had now wouldn’t last. It never did.

That’s why… he needed to search for a way. A way to avoid their fates. Deep down, he knew getting entangled with her wouldn’t set him free, but trapped in yet another prison of his own making. She had poisoned his mind too much. It was more accurate to say that she was just another master of him. Yet… he found himself thinking, her prison wouldn’t be so bad. He couldn’t stop himself from wanting more, despite knowing it would only lead him to doom. He was weak. So weak.

But… that had been more painful than anything else. More painful than losing his own freedom. The day he thought he lost her again. He had been wandering in darkness so long, guided by one beam of light. When it went out, everything had collapsed. He was falling, falling. No. He didn’t want to be alone again. Without her. It had been so cold. He hated the cold. Hated not knowing where he was, who he was. Hated the way his heart stuttered, how he couldn’t breathe. He was no better than a caged animal.

If he chose to suffer… they should suffer together.

She had him by the leash. She didn’t even realize it.

And that… pissed him off.

He shouldn’t be. Shouldn’t want her to suffer alongside him, after everything they had been through. It was better to watch from afar, to keep her safe, as long as she could be happy. She wouldn’t survive the suffering like he could. Being together like this, as a family, should have been enough. But he couldn’t help it. They had always been one body. Was it so wrong to want to create a reality with her, rather than just always imagining one?

And… he couldn’t stand the thought of another boy taking his place. No, it was his role to be by her side, and his role alone. He wasn’t going to let some outsider who had hurt her be able to close the distance he so desperately wished he could close instead.

He… didn’t understand what she saw in this boy. This boy with weak convictions. At the shelter, the girl never glanced at anyone else but him. But now, her gaze was constantly directed at Zayne. He held her smiles, even though he didn’t deserve it. He left enough of an impression for him to even remain in her memory for more than a week, something that Caleb had been struggling so often to do. She offered her hand to him, while Caleb was stuck watching from the sidelines, unable to get closer than what society had deemed appropriate. The attention that should have been on him, was put on someone else. She was so… at ease. And it wasn’t with him.

The idea that she no longer needed him… that she would cast him aside… for someone else…

He couldn’t let that happen. Never.

Not by the person who almost took her away. Why were they always taking her away?

Zayne stiffened in his hold. Suddenly, the cold got too much, even for Caleb. He jumped up, shaking his hands, now coated in ice. He looked back at Zayne.

“You… didn’t forget? Then you know the monster isn’t me,” Zayne said, carefully. “I know what I did. But… you had to have seen it. Treat me however you want. But I’m not… like you. I’m not—”

Caleb lunged forward, flipping Zayne over, pressing his arm against his neck. He narrowed his eyes. “You really do talk too much. I prefer you best when you’re quiet.”

Zayne coughed. He waved his arms, tapping Caleb’s hold. Ice blasted Caleb away once more, an impenetrable fortress. Zayne placed his hands on his knees as he stood up.

“Caleb? Are you guys still fighting?” the girl emerged from the bushes, dusting off the stray leaves that had gotten on her clothes. But this time, an ice wall sprouted from the ground, blocking the path, shielding her away from Zayne and Caleb. Caleb raised an eyebrow at Zayne as the girl pounded on the ice.

Zayne glared at Caleb. “Let’s stop this nonsense. You’re being childish.”

Childish? He had no idea.

“The way you behave is… too strange. She’ll find it odd. It could cause a relapse. You’ll need to act more normal if you are going to blend in. Observe how other children behave.”

He had been bred into a weapon. Trained to let go of his emotions. Violence was the only solution he learned. Obedience second nature.

And somehow… he was expected to just undo all of that, to act like a proper child, as if he had grown up conventionally and healthily. He tried to dumb himself down. To be an upstanding role model for her. To be the “big brother” she needed, a person she could be herself with. The perfect boy. He thought… if that's what she wanted, if that would make her happy, to keep believing that Caleb was this great guy who would always have her back, who she could live her childhood with, then he could do it. He would do anything for her. He didn’t care about anyone else.

But some things just… stuck. Some things couldn’t be undone. He couldn’t be fixed. An “act,” as Zayne had called it, was the best thing he could do. Pretending became instinctive. This whole family had been built on pretend. A beautiful lie, just for her.

But clearly, it hadn’t been good enough.

Josephine introduced the girl to Zayne. Her excuse was so that they could have a friend before they start school, but he knew the real reason was to have someone keep an eye on them. That was always the case. And he noticed the way Josephine kept glancing at him, biting her lower lip. The way she would scold him for lingering around the girl too much, not giving her enough space.

Caleb wasn’t stupid. Josephine was banking on the fact that the girl would move onto Zayne, instead of staying attached to Caleb. Caleb was always… “other.” Not good enough. No matter how much he strived to be the best, he’d always be flawed.

“Childish?” Caleb repeated, eyes glinting. “I wonder if you’d still think that after this.”

It didn’t matter if he had already won. His bloodlust could not be easily satisfied.

He raised his slingshot up again. He tugged the rubber band back, stretching the band until it thinned out into vibrations, until his right arm exploded into tiny bursts of pain—while the arm had long since healed, it still hurt when exerting too much pressure. A side effect of healing too fast, but Josephine liked to call it psychological trauma.

Putting all force into the slingshot, he could feel his energy leave him. The slingshot wavered. Like hell he’d allow her to get close to the person who almost took her life. He was going in for the kill. Enough games.

“I’m not going to give up,” Zayne said. “I know what I did. But I’m not going to let it happen again. I finally discovered my own purpose.”

“You think a murderer can protect their victims?” Caleb scoffed.

“I… no,” Zayne sighed. “But I refuse to sit by and continue doing nothing, to act like everything is alright when it’s not. I want to do something. So… I’m going to do whatever it takes to regain trust, to make things work.”

Caleb blinked. So… noble. It was twisting his guts, making him feel like he had been kicked out of his body. He swallowed hard. He covered it up with a brisk laugh, short and harsh. “Yeah… pretty words won’t be enough for that.”

How can a cowardly boy who was used to avoidance change so drastically?

“I’ll prove it. I’ll show it,” Zayne insisted. “I… want to be more human. Not a monster.”

Ridiculous. He already was. And acting like he can fix things all on his own, that he can actively fight whatever may be in store for him later? Even more preposterous. He was more naïve than two children who were sheltered all their lives.

Because if he succeeds… then what was everything he sacrificed for?

He didn’t dare hope. He couldn’t go soft. Couldn’t let room in for disappointment. And he certainly wasn’t pitying this boy.

Caleb lowered his slingshot, placing his hands on Zayne’s shoulders. Looking into those distasteful eyes, he opened his mouth—

The ice wall behind him exploded. Tiny flakes descended upon them. The girl emerged from the other side, panting.

Caleb’s eyes widened. How is that possible? So far, the girl had only ever been able to interact with Caleb. Their energies matched each other, and they had the same wavelengths. A perfect fit. She often could not replicate the same performance with others. She could only resonate with someone she had formed a close bond with, someone she entirely trusted, someone whose energy could somewhat match hers.

Zayne had nothing to do with them. So how was it that she was able to use her Evol to wield it as her own?

Wait… she had done it back then, too. Did their Evols call out to each other, complement each other, just like with his? But… he thought he was the only one—

No. There have been others, haven’t there? There had always been others—

“Finally! Is anyone hurt? Do I need—”

“We’re fine, Pip-squeak.” Caleb rolled his eyes. “Didn’t I mention it before? I wouldn’t hurt him. Stop using your Evol all willy-nilly.” He mumbled under his breath, “He’s right about that, at least.”

“Well, I was worried…” the girl paused, looking between Zayne and Caleb, her lips stretching out into a grin. “Oh. You guys do look close, don’t you? I seem to always catch you in… intimate situations.”

Ah. So she had seen that before, too. Red heated Zayne’s cheeks again. Good grief. He got flustered way too easily. His lips moved, only a tiny wheeze being gasped out, “Close?”

Caleb let go of his shoulders, then dusted them off, as a favor. Zayne flinched, rubbing the tender areas. Caleb turned away from Zayne, smiling at the girl. “Yeah, Pip-squeak. That’s right. We finally overcame our differences. Turns out, we have a lot in common. I look forward to… seeing him around more.”

Tormenting, I mean.

Zayne looked at Caleb as if he had grown two heads, or rather, like his skin had erupted.

He turned his smile to Zayne, raising both eyebrows. Zayne’s cheeks puffed and puckered like he had swallowed a lemon whole. His brow furrowed. “Y-yes… I suppose so.”

As Zayne took a step forward, his footprint left a puddle of frost in his wake. His hand flickered between blue and black.

“Watch out!” Caleb bit out, although he no longer knew to whom. He found himself grabbing Zayne’s wrist, ice coating up his arm. The light snowfall seemed to be getting heavier…

“Oh my, what timing. It’s snowing again,” Josephine’s voice echoed from the distance. “And this winter has been so lovely so far.”

“It’s time for dinner anyways. Let’s eat. Maybe the snow will have let up by then,” another voice said. Zayne’s mother. Caleb vaguely remembered seeing his parents before, surrounding the child. But he never guessed that they were related. They looked nothing alike, nor shared any personality or mannerisms in common. But then again… “families” weren’t always how they were made out to be, were they?

Zayne was about to learn just how far they would have to take their pretending, for her sake.

“Kids! Time for dinner!” Zayne’s father shouted. Zayne gasped, shaking his hand away from Caleb’s. The ice melted once more. Taking a deep breath, closing his eyes, Zayne regained his composure. He took a step towards the girl again, but this time, the girl had fled, already disappearing into the house. Zayne stared, stupefied, at the girl’s retreating figure. He blinked. Then looked at his empty hand.

Caleb smirked, relief flooding his chest. “Welcome to the club.”

When Zayne didn’t move, he hit Zayne’s shoulder until he keeled over. “But this doesn’t mean I accept you.”