My Non-Existant Soul Has Been Exposed By This App

When someone tells me I’m cute

Has no-one ever wondered how school toilet seats get broken? Was someone’s no2 to powerful for the pathetic seats?

There is a girl in my French class who commonly refers to herself as a potato and when she answers the register she only responds with ‘Je suis POMME DE TÈRE’

My little sister and my stepbrother are literally the same person - although one is blond and male and my sister is female and a brunette. They can’t see the resemblance. My dad and I are laughing behind their backs because they don’t realise it AT ALL. We are testing to see how far they will go. They have banned the other from their rooms. SO FAR SO GOOD 😂

This is definitely the best advice I’ve ever been given 😂