ItsaboutTheYearning

Cassie: Are you telling us you don't know the difference between a plum and a peach?

(imagine them running through the “incident” and someone coughs bullshit every time Clark speaks, Alfred is so obviously perched defensively near Bruce and furious, Red Hood somehow showed up? Dick is in full gaslight gatekeep girlboss mode even though Bruce wishes he Would Not, Damian is stuck in the elevator trying to get Batcow up to “witness this miscarriage of justice” and Cass keeps flashing increasingly concerning hand signs at Bruce up on the “stand” and every time someone mentions the complainant - Booster Gold - Tim says “who?” just loud enough for the entire room to hear)

Dick Learnt English young like really young despite traveling around. Right, except his parents never taught him. He learned bc one of the older folks at the circus has a tv (which John and Mary saw no point in bc what is a Grayson if not in constant motion staring at a box all day would be dreadfully boring)

Now the… slight issue with is? Well she was old

Like very old

And the shows she would watch would have been from when she was a young child

What I’m saying is Dick Grayson learned English through 40s tv shows and had a transatlantic accent and would say things like “gee” and “gosh” and “swell” and bc the rest of the circus were

A) not that well versed in English

B) far far far too charmed to ever correct him

Or

C) were well aware that an old timey accent added to the charm of the circus and brought it just that much more revenue

But you see the vision

“Boy oh boy I sure am excited to go out with you today!”

“Gee Gosh I hope I didn’t bug that poor kid”

???? ARE YOU SEEING MY VISION ????

Like everyone (including Bruce) thinks he’s putting it on until after his parents fall and Jim is like “kid you can drop the act no one is looking or listening it’s fine” and Dick states using his massive blue eyed that are very shiny with tears (should be considered a lethal weapon) and is like “oh well, what ever are could you speaking about” like he came out of the wizard of Oz

And like after he gets out of juvie he obviously got the accent beaten out of him but a few weeks living in a manor and he gets Robin and he starts to slip

And oh my days

Alfred is just. So. Charmed. By. The. Tiny. Young. Master. And. His. Little. Accent

It’s so perfectly quaint like it came out of a movie from the 40s

Dick doesn’t say go to the movies he says let’s see a picture

And like no one, not even Babs is aware that his og accent is literally a tv accent from the fifties. The only people who know are Bruce, Alfred, Clark, Lois, Selina and Diana.

Clark and Lois find out together bc Bruce drops Dick off at Clark’s bc he has a date a fight scheduled with Talia and like he can’t bring Dick bc they will fight. Just fight. Okay Alfred. Geez

Anyway Clark immediately goes “gee gosh Dick it’s great ta meetcha” bc Christopher Reeve was my Clark Kent for too long for it to not be and Dick immediately latches on to the familiar speech tone and replies to Clark with an equally antiquated expression with stars in his eyes.

And Bruce has to explain “no he isn’t mocking Clark, he came this way bye” before jetting off to FIGHT Talia that’s what they’re doing yep.

And Lois has to sit there and watch as these two people who talk like the movies her grandparents watch excitedly circle each other like a giant malamute and a Pomeranian becoming friends

It’s both horrifying to her sensibilities and inexplicably adorable.

Diana has a similar story but Lois isn’t there for comedic effect

And Selina well I like to think Selina puts on the like “old timey accent” whenever she’s being flirty to get away from stealing something like “oh dear, you think it was lil ole me who took that well I never” she’d do it

But like post baby Grayson acquisition she does it and Bruce like winces and is like “please don’t remind me of my son rn” and Selina is like????????? And Bruce/batman has to explain that Robins actually unironically deadest of asses has a transatlantic accent and

Selina to this day has never heard it but the sheer horror in Bruce’s face whenever she pulls it out is enough for her to buy it

Also side note

Diana: Which one?

Superboy 1994 Issue 1: I’m getting choked out on a beach in Hawaii

He’s forced to wear sunglasses and a baseball cap and referred to solely as Robin’s dad and he keeps making bitter and passive aggressive comments about Batman.

By all accounts he and Helena Sandsmark should get along as archeological associates whose kids became vigilantes and refuse to give it up but they absolutely hate each other. He & Bonnie also loathe each other. The fighting is a 1000 times worse and the entire snack table is destroyed.

Jack makes a very pointed comment about how Nightwing isn’t Robin’s father and everyone thinks Robin’s home life is a messy gay divorce soap opera between Batman, his civilian ex-husband, and his new partner Nightwing.

Robin!Dick: Okay, but it’s a little stilted. "I am feeling trepidation at the prospect of a parentless existence?" No kid talks like that.

Tim and Kon's part alien son: grandpa I promise if I ever become evil and take over the world I won't kill you

Bruce: thank you chum 🥰💖💖 do you want another ice cream sandwich