everyone needs to grow the fuck up and start playing pretend with toys
this is another one of those posts that gets tags like “i know this is a joke but…” and i understand why but i have to once again stress i have never been more serious
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Love Begins
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we're not kids anymore.

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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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@theinfinitelyclassyoctopus
everyone needs to grow the fuck up and start playing pretend with toys
this is another one of those posts that gets tags like “i know this is a joke but…” and i understand why but i have to once again stress i have never been more serious

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Occtis' guide to combat:
intimidate them with necromantic shadow magic and bolts of sickly green flame, drawn from grave realms far beyond our own
if that fails, say "hey, come on, I'm just a little guy, I'm a little boy, PLUS it's my birthday, I'm a little birthday boy"
Occtis you better run 👻
A couple of years ago we were all terribly concerned about the fact that a lot of American high schools are assigning such crushing homework loads that some kids literally don't have enough time to eat or sleep (and all this in spite of the fact that there's no good evidence that assigning homework actually improves academic outcomes at the pre-university level), but now we're hearing stories about those same schools struggling to stop kids from using ChatGPT to write their essays and suddenly It's The Children Who Are Wrong. Like, do you think maybe there's a certain level of cause and effect in play here?

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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FROGS, AZUNE!
Finished 😪
Print will be available at Mcm London this weekend!
Let her pet the damn fox.
Your body must be rested and fed if you wish to be a pervert.
ppl are rlly trying to defend being on your phone during a movie in the theater what is going on
using your phone in a movie theater is a symptom of long covid
the defense of being on your phone in a movie theater is who cares? by your own admission, you should be paying attention to the movie. so why do you care what other people are doing? you’re meant to be paying attention to the movie.

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i hope they make each other worse 🫶💕✨
someone in the tags said Thimble should make a little hammock on Tyranny's horns and then i blacked out and now i have this
“Every time I show the film – whether it’s to film students at USC or UCLA or I’m going to a festival – that’s always the first question: How did Kermit ride the bicycle? And my stock answer is: I put him on a three-wheeler until he got his balance, and then I put him on the two-wheeler.”
— James Frawley, director of The Muppet Movie
10 photos taken seconds from disaster
(dead) occtis tachonis

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It's kind of tragic how homophobia affects insecure men.
Like sometimes they want to experiment with a bit of anal and instead of just buying a sex toy and some lube like a normal person, they instead shove random objects up their ass that inevitably get stuck and then they try to get them out by themselves which makes things worse and then they lie to doctors about it and like this all leads to all kinds of extra complications like internal damage, risk of infections, bleeding, the fall of Yugoslavia, etc.
Come on guys, just buy a dildo. It's way safer and it leads to way fewer problems.
he's having a day