Sarcasm Pending

i’m gently cupping every woman’s face when I say this: there are things far worse than being single at any age

do not let your loneliness convince you that indifference or someone who is constantly hot + cold is better than being alone. being misunderstood or unappreciated is a loneliness of its own

what a beautiful day to not be in high school

This is the like those “remember to be grateful you don’t have a sore throat right now” posts. It IS a beautiful day to not be in high school! Thank you!

surprisingly forward-thinking of jim henson and co. to make a female character in the 70's that's allowed to be loud-mouthed and violent and kind of overwhelmingly romantic and even a huge bitch at times and not have a moment where any character asks her to change

going through all the muppet movies in a row made me realize that like. miss piggy was made in the 70's. and it's so rare even today to have a character like her. she's loud, she's selfish, she's funny, she's extremely vain, she's obsessed with romance, she's violent, she's kind of annoying, and there's not a single moment in any of these films where she's asked to tone down any of these personality traits. i am not joking when i say that miss piggy might be one of the best treated female characters ever written

Where I come from, we don’t worry about these fruity-tuity California style buds. Okay? I’m from Scranton. What i’m smoking is dirt. So lets get that straight jack. Pure brick. Ass. Okay? America- Americans are wanting to smoke that dirt, okay? You go up to someone and say, hey, I’m gonna give you a big bag of this heady bud, but I’m taking your stash of mids, they’re gonna say C’mon man! get out of here! *audience cheers* that’s right. that’s right. Get the hell out of here! We like stems! We like seeds! Where I come from.

this post is scripture to me like this is a seminal text. to me

I need her in more dropout content

we should start giving testosterone to ants

uncles

too much undertale/deltarune content has me playing other games and thinking "well naturally at some point they must address the seperation between player and player-character, their status as a vessel and the inherent unfairness of having us control their life, right?" as if thats just a normal thing for videogames to contain.

do you think mario resents me for making him drive go kart

this is going to sound like such a little sibling ass take but i genuinely believe that being a little bit annoying is actually a greater sign of maturity and self awareness than being universally likeable and on good terms with everyone

if some people find me annoying and can't stand me because of how i think and act then that means i'm a fully realized human being with my own personality and opinions and free will and not just a reflective surface for other people's desires, which is in fact a good thing despite what people who want you to just be a reflection of their own opinions and desires will tell you, and why being considered "cringe" or whatever doesn't bother me at all

also it's really funny when you're confident enough in yourself to know that people not liking you isn't always a sign that you're the problem. like there's something undeniably hilarious about being aware your mere existence has the power to piss someone off and ruin their day and i recommend embracing it.

Oh fucking thissss

Kid with a bluey backpack on the flight to Sydney this must be his mecca

everyone needs to hate the united states with me this saturday cause im gonna lose my goddamn mind having to hear the wildly undeserving american autofellatio that is the fourth of july.

hear me when i say that just about everything good that has come out of this country has come out of it in spite of what its founders intended it to be, in spite of what it sees itself as, in spite of its stated and unstated values and goals for itself and the world. in order to love the people of the americas you have to hate the united states.

every year around late may, without fail, this post starts getting notes again . and my little wet raw chicken breast of a brain gets puzzled. because i forget that summer is , in fact. a yearly event

You gotta watch this one the whole way through.