Assigned Cool Girl At Birth

the best part about having a job is being able to go through doors other people aren’t allowed to use the worst part is everything else

i see we are all angry about this

@artemispanthar

finding a new doctor. applying for jobs. searching for apartments. messaging used car dealers. getting your health insurance to do their job. getting a pharmacy to do their job. getting the dmv to accept the documents they told you to bring. just listing things they probably make you do in hell

the hottest thing a guy can be is barely conscious on the floor while someone lifts his head up by the hair so that you can see his glazed out eyes and the blood running down his face

there's something to be said about characters whose deep wells of love and devotion are connected to equally deep wells of violence, particularly when the dam between those wells bursts

the most important virtues for the young woman are as follows: time theft, selfishness, orgasms, irreverence to authority, sacrilegious behavior, a questioning mind, and eating regular meals.

Some of you are like "I'm fine with Jews just so long as they don't live in communities too large or have too much money or build community infrastructure or hold any political power or or or"

i hope i am not just an online presence to you all but also someone who has a really bad headache

When you get more objective about the way nature is & away from weird anthropomorphic carnivore slander it is a little funny when the baby sea turtles hatch and every other animal in like a ten mile radius goes "oh fuck yum one million mini sliders"

Oh, to be a little kitten who just got vaccinated and then taken to a high-end restaurant and tasted the best food the chefs could offer and then fell asleep in a basket.

The wall of durian to keep them off the table!

ㅤ

@kittybroker ... ?

Have fun with this bathtub delight now reduced for only $19.87!