Officer Dangus

OFFICER DANGUS: Hold up. Hold up. Let me get this straight. Ya tied yer car keys to a dang kite? That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard in my life! And I’ve heard a heck of a lotta crazy stuff.

DR. WILSON: I was going for authenticity. Benjamin Franklin style.

ALVIN 2.0: Aside from being very risky business, it really WAS kinda awesome! I wish I got to enjoy the moment more instead of freaking out at ya.

DR. WILSON: You and Brittany really rose to the occasion. I’m glad you were able to talk sense into me.

THEODORE: ME TOO! I was so scared you’d get struck by lightning! I’m really happy you’re okay! Getting struck by lightning is NOT FUN!

OFFICER DANGUS: Why’s he sayin’ that like he knows from experience?

SIMON: Because he does.

OFFICER DANGUS: What!?

THEODORE: It’s true! I got struck by lightning and then I thought I was gonna turn into an evil supervillain like Dr. Zap.

DR. WILSON: Oh dear.

OFFICER DANGUS: Wait just a cotton pickin’ minute. If ya got struck, where’s your scars? Don’t people usually get scars?

THEODORE: Uhhhh…I dunno.

SIMON: Mutant chipmunks are fairly resistant to scarring.

ALVIN 2.0: And yet, my freckle zit scars remain.

OFFICER DANGUS: I learn something new about you kids every day.

DR. WILSON: So, Officer Dangus, is it? I hear you’re basically a father now. Did you foresee this life changing development?

OFFICER DANGUS: Well, err, I kinda…I expected it a little. I’ve dreamed about Dave Seville for years. I knew these young’ns were part of the deal. They’re real good kids, the lot of ‘em. I’m livin’ my best life. They helped me gain the confidence to tell Dave how I felt….and the rest is history.

DR. WILSON & ALVIN: History. Our worst subject. (Laughing together)

SIMON: Truly a monumental change for the better.

DR. WILSON: It is quite an exceptional story.

THEODORE: This family is the best!

OFFICER DANGUS: Hey, Adam, you’re pretty much part of the family too...the way Alvin never stops jibber jabberin’ ‘bout ya.

DR. WILSON: Aw shucks. Really?

SIMON: One of the most influential people in his life.

ALVIN 2.0: You’re the first grown-up I’ve ever been able to call my friend!

DR. WILSON: This is…..my goodness….I don’t know what to say.

THEODORE: It’s okay. Take your time.

DR. WILSON: This is monumental. I, I’m not sure if you know this, but I don’t have very many friends.

OFFICER DANGUS: Well, now ya do. And I can be a friend too! (Teasing) Since ya finally paid all those parking tickets ya’ve been rackin’ up.

DR. WILSON: (embarrassed) Heh heh.

ALVIN 2.0: Of course, you’re probably gonna get another one since ya had to leave your car at school overnight, but…uh…maybe they don’t ticket ya for that!

DR. WILSON: (facepalm)

OFFICER DANGUS: Okey dokey! Here’s your stop. I got the address right….I think.

SIMON: No. This is 645 Cedar Lane. Dr. Wilson lives at 654 Birch Drive.

OFFICER DANGUS: Aw fudge nuggets! Cedar, Birch, they’re both trees! I got confused.

ALVIN 2.0: If ya let me drive, I can take us there! I know a shortcut.

OFFICER DANGUS: Uh uh little man.

ALVIN 2.0: (shrugs) It was worth a shot. You know, that time ya let me play with your walkie-talkie was fun and all, but I have always wanted to drive a cop car! I don’t think it would be that out of line for you to let somebody who is pretty much your son take it for a teensy weensy spin!

DR. WILSON: (trying not to laugh)

OFFICER DANGUS: Don’t make me yell at you like Dave does. Do you want that?

ALVIN 2.0: (shakes his head side to side)

OFFICER DANGUS: No. Nobody wants that.

THEODORE: I just wanna get home. I’m ready to make dinner…and eat dinner. (Stomach growling)

OFFICER DANGUS: Aw shoot! Was I supposed to make a left turn or a right at that intersection?

SIMON: Left. You know what? I’ll be your GPS.

DR. WILSON: What a splendid idea.

“First, Alvin woke up at the crack of dawn to climb on the roof and watch the sunrise. Theodore heard him and thought he was the boogyman.”

“Then, Simon and I played a game of Trivial Pursuit which was interrupted by Geizmo running into the room screaming about Warbie knocking down his Lego castle.”

“After that, the Chipettes stopped by for lunch and Eleanor pranked Alvin with some hot sauce filled pizza rolls as a late April-Fools joke.”

“Simon accidentally pulled a muscle in his back and I had to rub ointment on him.”

“Derek showed up with Eleanor for round 2 of the pranks. My car was covered in silly string.”

“I called Officer Dangus and he made Derek and Eleanor apologize and then took them for a ride in his cop car.”

“I got a call from him 30 minutes later saying that he lost Eleanor.”

“By dinnertime, I was about ready to fall over, so I took a nap on the couch. I woke up with Brittany testing her new makeup on me.”

“She was under the backseat! Got me in the face with silly string too! Oooh boy, what a day.”

It’s got the whole family in it! And a big Miss. Miller moment you won’t wanna miss!

Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas!

"Doris Dangus and I are officially...dating!"

“I hope that old lady with the cats don’t watch me.”