a daydream dressed like a nightmare

God dam it Pete.

Reblogging for the sheer hilarity of the gif.

It would be a mistake not to

“Four score and one booty ago damn that’s a fine ass”

well well well. if it isn’t my old friend, the dawning realization that i fucked up real bad

If you replace ‘men’ with ‘Jews’, a huge percentage of Tumblr becomes nazi propaganda.

if you replace “beef” with “human flesh” a lot of recipes become disgusting and illegal

THIS IS SO SCARILY ACCURATE

me in any situation

10nant you in groups of people, precious anxious baby

Harry Potter as a teen comedy…

Seriously, I will reblog everytime. Whoever did this, I have eternal love for you.

There should be a word to describe that horrible feeling you get when you realize halfway through telling a story that it’s not as funny as you thought it was, but it’s too late to back out. So you just finish the story and everyone listening does that awkward polite laugh and then it gets quiet, so you burn your house down, fake your death, move to Chile and start a new life as a loner fisherman.

when you die and become a ghost are you forced to wear what you were wearing when you died for eternity or can you go to like Ghost Gap and buy some new ghost clothes

if theres ghost capitalism i swear to fuck ill be so mad

overthrow the boogeoisie

actually that is a rectangle cheese

[oxford comma laughing in the distance]

[vocative comma wondering what oxford comma thinks it’s doing here]

I already reblogged this for the pun but I’m reblogging again for the sick punctuation banter

it’s wild times on tumblr tonight

#also after you tell me you gotta convince me you aren’t just mocking me#’cause that’s the next problem (Via canaa)

zig-a-zig ahhhhh *jazz hands*