bites you bites you bites y

if you pick up a pair of tongs and dont click them at least twice you fail the turing test

probably nothing lesbian will happen to me this pride but by god i can Hope

batshit normal

I WISH THINGS HAD TURNED OUT DIFFERENTLY!!!!!!!!! goes to the supermarket

i refused to stay buried because i love you why are you running

babe it's me i'm just covered in dirt and blood because i had to claw my way up into the light and crawl on my hands and knees back home to you stop screaming

Oh, to be granted the power to speak to animals for just like 38 seconds, so that I could tell this pebble-brained feathery fuckass that nobody is impressed that he started singing earlier than anybody else. There's no bird pussy available at 2 am. The dames can sense your desperation. Stop screaming for at least three more hours.

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

Happy pride month! This website’s staff hates you

i love digesting lactose it’s so easy to do