help.

[no beers in] do you think im ever going to belong somewhere

Like to charge, reblog to cast?

cradling the em dash in my hands what the fuck have they done to you

stop drinking beer with the deer and come have a cider with the spiderrrr

there is nothing more important than a dear friend you can be a huge fucking asshole hater with

being asked what i want for my birthday and suddenly I'm a minimalist who has never had a material want in my whole life

attempting to install linux , microsoft making me wwnt to (remembers i shouldnt make suicide jokes because its bad for my mental health);; Scream Very Loudly

god I'm such a slut for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce *decides it’s inaccurate to refer to myself as a slut in light of my minimal sexual activity* if The Enemy discovered my ardor for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce, they would gain a significant strategic advantage

Google search how to come up with an extra $2500 over the next year on top of studying and working

I need my weird alone time or I will explode

saying "question mark?" and "however comma," out loud are game changers. punctuation on the go. and it's always the funniest thing that anyone around you has ever heard

telling a vampire "youre not allowed in my house anymore" and they get blasted out through the nearest wall

guy currently hurtling toward a migraine at a rate that would impress most astrophysicists: i wonder wgat is happening in my beautiful telephone