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I know how difficult it can feel to find someone here in the ABDL community.

I started my Tumblr in 2014 and I didn’t meet my now-fiancée until 2018, and didn’t officially become a couple until 2024. It took years, many conversations, several meet-ups, and a whole lot of patience.

So why share this?

Because what I’ve been seeing lately honestly breaks my heart..

I have several close friends in this community who are genuinely looking for someone to build a life with. Instead, I keep hearing stories about judgment, ghosting, impossible standards, and people giving up because they feel like they’ll never be enough.

I don’t pretend to have all the answers (and I am guilty of at least half of what I’m about to share) but after 12 years here, I wanted to share some of the feedback I’ve gotten and some of what I’ve learned:

Don’t lead with your dealbreakers.

I’ve seen a lot of blogs where the very first thing someone encounters is a long list of everything that will get them rejected.

Relationships aren’t built by eliminating people first… they’re built by discovering who someone is.

Let’s go back 50 years for a second. No social media. No profiles. No long lists of dealbreakers…

How did you get to know someone?

You struck up a conversation at a bar. You accepted a blind date. You spent time with someone before deciding who they really were.

Ok yes, social media is different.

Before anyone jumps on me – I completely understand why many have their guard up. If your inbox is full of crude messages, objectification, or people who can’t hold a normal conversation, of course you’re going to become more selective.

But somewhere between protecting ourselves and finding the right person, I think many of us have started filtering out good people before they ever get the chance to introduce themselves.

Today, it’s easy to judge someone by a profile picture, a single post, or one opinion that doesn’t perfectly match our own.

Let people introduce themselves before assuming they’re incompatible.

Be willing to take a reasonable chance.

My fiancée and I talked for six months before she flew to meet me.

Of course you should be safe. Meet in public. Tell friends where you’re going. Take sensible precautions.

But eventually, if someone has earned your trust, you have to give the relationship a chance to exist in the real world.

Many great relationships begin with one person deciding the risk is worth taking.

Don’t make ideological purity the prerequisite for getting to know someone.

My fiancée and I barely discussed politics during our first several visits together.

Instead, we talked about our families, our goals, what made us laugh, what we were struggling with, and ultimately what kind of life we wanted to build.

An imperfect union doesn’t require perfect agreement.

Some differences matter. Others simply challenge us to see the world through another person’s eyes.

If every disagreement becomes a reason to walk away, we’ll never discover the people who could have changed us for the better.

Authenticity beats image.

This is probably directed more toward the men (I’ve made these mistakes).

It’s easy to think you need the perfect career, the nicest car, or some larger-than-life personality.

But in my experience, women don’t care about that as much as they care about how you make them feel, how you treat them, and ultimately where you are headed.

When I met my fiance I had quit my job, drove a 10-year old Mazda, lived at home, and had no money.

But I had a vision and I had action to back it up.

The right person will see you for where you are going, not for where you are.

What mattered most was being vulnerable, making her laugh, treating her with kindness, and consistently showing up.

None of that had anything to do with status.

Final thought

The ABDL community is much smaller than the general dating world, which can make it feel impossible sometimes.

Don’t rush it…

Be someone worth knowing.

Take reasonable chances.

Treat people well.

Reblog if you would wear diaper 24/7

This is a edited version of the original post Trapped. I have edited it a little as well as added to it to turn it into a story of a 20-year-old collage boy with a kinky twisted side wishing he had no control and was forced back into diapers by a daddy.

So ever considered what it would be like to be trapped in a crib laying on a vinyl mattress cover with hands and feet restrained? How about waist trapped too while wearing thick diapers with locking plastic pants? Let’s add confinement in permanent metal chastity cage. But wait there’s more. Try this one for size for added terror, frustration, and denial. You have a Wi-Fi controlled vibrating butt plug securely inserted up your bottom. It’s a retention type plug so once carefully inserted with plenty of lubricant; it’s not slipping out even if you tried to expel the intrusive plug from your bottom

As you read this in the back of a fetish magazine you find yourself rock hard and dreaming of having this exact thing done to you. The acritical goes on to say that by filling out the contract listed below at my website and submitting it to daddy your dream can come true. Now rock hard and your brain running wild you open your laptop and find the web site filling the form out as you slowly stroke and rub the front of your shorts. Once done you hit submit.

As fast as you sent the form to daddy, you receive an e-mail from daddy. As you read the e-mail you see a time and address to report to for your training. Now rock hard and mind fully in fetish mode you see that you have one hour to get across town to daddy's address. You jump in the shower and throw on a pair of sweatpants sock and t-shirt. Once dressed you more or less run to your car still sporting an erection thinking my dream is going to come true. You arrive at 3 pm like instructed on Friday afternoon and have the entire weekend free to be the horny diaper boy for a Dom daddy.

You ring the doorbell and a tall 30- to 40-year-old answers the door and say's hello boy come in and take your shoes off. Once inside you are instructed to call him daddy as he walks you to a room filled with baby furniture only everything in the room is built for an adult. Daddy instructs you to remove all of your clothes and get on the changing table. Once on the table you have lotion and powder rubbed all over you then a generous amount of lube is applied to you tight hole.

Daddy tells you to relax and the toy will be inserted. You feel the large toy press against your hole. You relax and take a deep breath as it is pushed deep in once thrust. Daddy looks you in the eye's and says that my good boy. Next you see daddy placing a ring around your balls and watch as he slides a metal cage over your hard pee, pee as daddy calls it. It takes some time, but daddy gets that cage on and you are now locked in your first every chastity cage. You lay back as you strain inside the cage. Daddy then slides the thickest diaper under you that you have ever seen. t is all white with cute baby prints on the tape zone. Daddy pulls it up and fastens the tapes before patting the front of the diaper as he say's you're such a good boy for daddy. You feel like you are in heaven this is a dream come true, something you have always wanted to try and have done to you.

You’re made to go to bed at exactly 8:30 pm and have to drink a large baby bottle filled with water every 30 mins. 4 hours prior to bed. What you don't know is daddy has added a generous dose of some medication that makes you sleep “like a baby” and behave like you are a toddler age 3-5 years of age that's been given at least one full course of electro convulsive therapy (ECT). You have no way to resist because the therapies, and medication have made you powerless to resist. This will be your new life.

You now not only are wetting all night long due these therapies and a prior history of bedwetting nightly till age 12, but now you wet uncontrollably in the daytime. You may be in deep sleep for 1-2 hours or possibly 4-5 hours but sooner or later your daddy is going to access the App to the vibrating butt plug and torment you for God knows how long.

You’re utterly powerless to do anything but struggle tug kick and pull against the restraints you find yourself in. At first this was exciting and thrilling but the weekend has come and gone, and you are still trapped in the crib at daddy's house.

Unable to touch yourself and kept locked in chastity months have come and gone. The collage has kicked you out and you now belong to daddy

The days of daily diaper masturbation are now a distant memory. Those days were fun. Wet a bunch and rub one off inside one’s soggy pampers. No mess no harm, just good clean fun compulsive masturbation.

All the little boys reading this know exactly what I’m talking about. However, you're no longer a teenager at you’re an adult with adult responsibilities but you find yourself trapped in chastity cage permanently, uncontrollable wetting 24/7 x almost a year and you sleep in a crib. It’s no longer fun anymore because your keeper doesn’t allow you to make cummies in you pampers very often.

Your penis has shrunk immensely too, and it is no longer firm enough to have normal penetrative sex. Your trapped and have nowhere to go except what you’re told to do by daddy.

The sound of all of this was exciting when you first read it 6 months ago. Now you have transitioned to spontaneously wetting yourself in the daytime with no control.

Daddy has broken you and turned you into a toddler kept locked in chastity and diapers just like in your fantasy?

This is how one little former chronic diaper masturbation adult lives his life every day. You are powerless too ever trying to escape. You can hear your vinyl crib mattress crinkle as you moan and try to break free. Daddy watches on his computer screen as the camara catches your every move. Daddy thinks it is funny but also sad because his baby has no more freedom. He’s in baby jail forever! Daddy 🤣🤣🤣