Sarc

sex is a distraction from your true purpose in life which is to go to the aquarium and look at the fish and go "wooooooaaah.... fishies". cmon guys we all need to lock in.

happy june everybody i hope you get fucked and/or sucked this month

what if we don't wanna be?

date idea would you like to watch a youtube short with me

official cephalopod post

"hogwash" still one of the best words ever. this shit is so unbelievable its pig water

I think it's really funny that Japanese also has a word for "Edgelord" but theirs translates to "8th grader"

it's not even '8th grader' it's even funnier. chunibyo is eighth grade syndrome. like explicitly a diagnosis. i diagnose you with edgelord

I think I can confidently speak for all of us when I say we were all expecting a cat.

Boba is a good cat name.

@official-cephaloposts This count?

the girl who is comfy in bed yearns to be On The Computer. The girl who is On The Computer yearns to be comfy in bed. Thus does desire become the root of all suffering

Basically I like when there’s garlic and onion

thanks for being nice to me. in return i will die for you and never leave your side and go grocery shopping with you.