attention freaks: it's me

nice outfit dude LOL. legolas called. apparently they're taking the hobbits somewhere really crazy

my favorite thing about crocodiles is yeah they're fantastic swimmers and yeah they can run pretty fast and yeah the smaller ones can even climb trees but also. they don't wanna do any of that shit. they just go no, no thanks. that's not for me. i think i'll just wait for someone to mistake me for a log and get too close. and then i'll eat them. many reptiles love this strategy but none pull it off like the humble croc

The thing is sometimes you really do have to chuckle darkly

"less is more" is a lie perpetuated by big small to sell more less

everything will probably be fine but i have to get really anxious just in case

the idea of consuming two conflicting things that promise to do the opposite of each other has always been hilarious to me. there’s a liquid shot-based sleep aid called 6 hour sleep and as soon as I saw it i immediately imagined mixing it and a 5 hour energy together for a 1 hour nap

mix NyQuil and DayQuil to create Quil

what does Quil do

All the time all the time

Honestly you're beyond delusional if you actually really truly believe Taylor Swift isn't a right winger, if not straight up an asset of the regime.

the tweet pretending to be a japanese person going to a mexican restaurant is not a "milkshake duck" you are just stunningly racist and willing to believe basically any caricature of an asian person that's presented to you no matter how racist if it reconfirms your orientalist and chauvinistic biases

in addition, this has been a consistent trend, especially regarding Japanese people, on twitter. There is mombot, one of the first and certainly the biggest and the most long-lasting example that claimed to be "just a Japanese housewife concerned about games and anime" during the advent of gamergate that later got doxxed as a white guy living in one of the great plains state. He claimed that this is a troll that we all fell for, but it was painfully obvious from day 1. Then there's a British reactionary guy that pretended to be Japanese that went on for years, too. This is yet another one you all fell for, and this is not a new phenomenon. At some point, you all need to develop any amount of discernment for spotting digital yellowface, especially Japanese.

Fun how the bystander effect was coined to cover up how cops are bigoted cowards who let a queer person die and stockholm syndrome was coined to cover that the cops handled a hostage situation so badly the hostages trusted their captors more than the cops.

try not to laugh for 10,000 years challenge ends in failure when on the 3,652,424th day a delightful tumbling beetle causes me to chuckle whistfully

i coul dnever be the captain of a ship. everyday id be like third lieutenant ..... do a backflip lol

Not book smart or street smart but a secret third thing.

supid

supid.